Experienced every man's worst nightmare today

[Jim Jones]

On my lunch break today I went a local mexican place..it's mostly for takeout, pretty small and very limited seating. So I order and then go to take a piss, but the bathroom is locked. OK, I wait.

About 5 minutes passes, I can tell my burrito is just about done, and the door opens and a GORGEOUS looking woman walks out. Brunette, perfect body, wearing a low-cut tank top and fairly short shorts. Couldn't have been more than 27 or 28. I sneak a peak as she walks by, then open the door and encounter one of the foulest scents I've smelled in recent memory. I grew up in a house with three other guys (brothers and dad) and what I smelled in that bathroom would rank right up there with some of the most toxic smelling dumps I ever experienced in my house growing up. I stepped inside and literally let out a loud "OH MY GOD" and then quickly turned around to see if anyone heard me. The door had already shut behind me, and now I was trapped. So I held my nose, pissed, and wondered to myself how such a gorgeous creature could push out something that smelled so utterly disgusting.

[Chief Chief]

Originally Posted by Jim Jones

About 5 minutes passes, I can tell my burrito is just about done,...

How, from just outside the restroom, could you tell that your burrito in the kitchen was just about done?

[kysirsoze]

Originally Posted by Norman Einstein

In Podunk America I might expect that, but I don't think I've ever been in a Restaurant that only had a single.

I live in Los Angeles and I see this all the time. Small places, but sometimes they're still pretty nice. Just no room for two restrooms.

[kysirsoze]

Originally Posted by Chief Chief

How, from just outside the restroom, could you tell that your burrito in the kitchen was just about done?

The smell of the burrito put the other scent to shame.

[BWillie]

How long would you wait to PIHB if she allowed you to defile her?

[BigMeatballDave]

Its called shit. We all produce it and it all smells.

Get over yourself.

[Chiefs Pantalones]

This is completely false.

[googlegoogle]

Please keep posting these wonderful stories

[Jim Jones]

Originally Posted by Chief Chief

How, from just outside the restroom, could you tell that your burrito in the kitchen was just about done?

I said it's a very small place. They cook the food right out there in view of everyone and the restroom is literally like 10 feet away. It's not a sit-down restaurant.

[Jewish Rabbi]

Originally Posted by damaticous

So, my girlfriend and I ate Mexican food last night and had a lot of alcohol. After we went home, made sweet love, then passed out on the bed. we woke up this morning and did our normal routine.

We decided that we'd meet for lunch at Taco bell for something quick and Mexican...again.

Tonight she still had a hankerin for Mexican food so we went to this local Mexican place. It's mostly a little hole in the wall for take out but some people like to stay and eat at the little tables that are inside.

Well, as we walk in my girlfriend says "I've gotta take a massive poo! Could you please order a beef Chimichonga for me?".

So, she goes to the bathroom while I order our food.

She comes back a little later and sits down with me at our table and says.

"Holy crap!!! That was the stinkiest poo i've ever had!!! All the recent Mexican food and alcohol hasn't been very nice to my tummy."

i say "bummber deal" as I proudly munch on my burrito.

"I went poo, and there was this cute little man waiting in line for the bathroom. I felt so sorry for him. I left a nasty smell for him".

"bummber deal" I say again.

"as I left the bathroom on my way to the table I heard him say 'OH MY GOD!'. I had to laugh. If he thought that was bad...."

"yeppers", I say. "you get some nasty smelly poo and farts after that much alcohol and Mexican. Maybe you should go back and let another one rip just outside the door before he comes out."

So she leaves the table and comes back a few seconds later.

"Whew! that was worse than my poo. Poor bastard. At least I'm wearing a low-cut tank top and these fairly short shorts, otherwise he'd think I was a totally disgusting gross person."

"maybe you should to say you are sorry and let him grab a boob?" I ask.

"yeah. i feel kind of bad. i think you are right."

She comes back and says....

"I was gunna lift up my low-cut tank top and let him feel my right boob, but when he came out his face was green. So I said 'i'm sorry about my stinky poo.' The guy said 'holy crap lady. that was nasty, but...."






I thought I'd continue the story.

Who's going to continue it??????/

Oh my god fail. Jesus Christ.

[GordonGekko]

Not saying that it could not of been her, because it could of been, but you do realize mexican joint, lots of bean items on the menu, and only one restroom for both sexes, that the restroom might of just smelled god awful to begin with. Could of very well been her though just saying.