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Old 07-20-2013, 10:24 AM  
Dante84 Dante84 is offline
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Close call this morning
My girl's roomie is out of town and her great dane got violently ill yesterday... just destroyed their carpeting. I guess her mom took the initiative to call a cleaning company to come out this morning, and didn't tell my gf until 7am today that the company would be there at 8.


Well, she calls me at 8:15 and wakes me up. Tells me that she let the guy in and that while he was upstairs, she decided to clean the wood floor in their kitchen. She was on all 4, scrubbing the floor, and she hears him right behind her say, "mmm... You sure are pretty" in a creepy ass voice. She immediately went outside and called me, asking if I would come over until he leaves.

I was ready to kill, man. Threw on shorts and a tshirt, grabbed my 9 iron, and sped over to her place.

I park, and this dude is a sweaty guy in his 50's with a weird, bent pigeon leg. He's in the driveway turning on his power vac. I walk right by him into the house with the club over my shoulder, and he looks really confused.

I sit on the couch in the entry way, holding my club, and 5 mins later he walks in, says, "hi," to which I don't respond.

He goes in the kitchen and says to my girl, "is that club for me?!"

She says "he's going to the range in a bit" at the same time I say "maybe"

He starts to ask her another question and I let him know that is done speaking with her, and to finish cleaning the carpet and leave.

Son of a bitch shuts his mouth, hops the **** to, and leaves the second he's done.

I haven't been that heated in years.
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Old 07-20-2013, 10:14 PM   #76
J Diddy J Diddy is offline
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Originally Posted by MOhillbilly View Post
I had a golf club for about three weeks. It some how ended up in a tree.
True story.
Prior to did you yell "pull"
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J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 07-20-2013, 11:04 PM   #77
CanadianChief CanadianChief is offline
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Wasted opportunity for a three-way if you ask me.
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CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
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Old 07-20-2013, 11:30 PM   #78
J Diddy J Diddy is offline
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Wasted opportunity for a three-way if you ask me.
Nobody wants to risk the splinters from the hard wood
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J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.J Diddy is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 07-20-2013, 11:53 PM   #79
'Hamas' Jenkins 'Hamas' Jenkins is offline
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don't **** up an important one like a 9 iron. What the hell you gonna do when you are 125 yards out? .
Hit a gap wedge.
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'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.'Hamas' Jenkins is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 07-21-2013, 07:58 AM   #80
CanadianChief CanadianChief is offline
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Nobody wants to risk the splinters from the hard wood
Dog vomit lube to the rescue.
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CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CanadianChief must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
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Old 07-21-2013, 08:26 AM   #81
Nickel D Nickel D is offline
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If the Great Dane's a male, ya shoulda forced the dude to get it doggy-style with him.
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Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.Nickel D would the whole thing.
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Old 07-21-2013, 08:39 AM   #82
Aries Walker Aries Walker is offline
Back again, again.
 
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A baseball bat's a better weapon. Stay away from crowbars though - they're too heavy and slow.
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Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Aries Walker has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
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Old 07-21-2013, 11:01 AM   #83
Goldmember Goldmember is offline
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maybe he was talking to the Great Dane
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Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Goldmember must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
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