Some Raiders Jokes...

[brent102fire]

Did you hear that the Post Office has just recalled their latest stamp? They had photos of Raider players on them and folks couldn’t figure out which side to spit on.

What would you call a pregnant Raiders fan? A dope carrier.

What do you call a Raiders fan with half a brain? Gifted.

There’s a rumor that Al Davis has lined up a new corporate sponsor for the Raiders – Tampax. He though it was appropriate since the team is going through a very bad period.

How do you save a Raider fan from drowning? Mop up the vomit.

What’s the difference between a Raiders fan and a Chimp? Ones hairy, stupid and smells, and the other is a Chimpanzee.

How do you knock out a Raiders fan when he’s been drinking? Slam the toilet seat on his head.

What are silver and black, silver and black, and silver and black? A drunken Raider fan rolling down the bleachers.

What do Raiders fans and laxatives have in common? Both irritate the absolute crap out of you.

Two Chargers fans were walking through a cemetery when they happened upon a tombstone that read: “Here lies Jose’ Sanchez, a good man and a Raiders fan.” So, one of the Chargers fans ask the other: “When the hell did they start putting two people in one grave?”

You’re trapped in a room with a Lion, Cobra snake and a Raiders fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do? Shoot the Raiders fan – twice.

What do you call a Raiders fan in a suit? The accused.

What do you call a Raiders fan that does well on an IQ test? Cheater.

What do you say to a Raiders fan with a job? I’ll have a Big Mac, fries and a coke.

A little boy took his parents to court because he did not want to live with them anymore. The honored Judge said to him, “So why don’t you want to live with your Dad?” “Because he beats me,” said the little boy. “Why don’t you want to live with your Mother then?” asked the Judge. “Because she beats me as well.” “Oh,” said the Judge “Well who would you like to live with then?” The little boy replied, “I would like to live with the Oakland Raiders because they don’t beat anyone.”

A Raiders Coach was wheeling his shopping cart across the supermarket parking lot when he noticed an old lady struggling with her shopping cart full of groceries. He stopped and asked, “Can you manage dear?” to which the old lady replied, “NO WAY – you got yourself into this mess, don’t ask be to sort it out!”