Hamas Chats with Sprint

['Hamas' Jenkins]

4:20:11 PM : Nathan Y: Hello. How are you.

4:20:15 PM : 1430: I am fine

4:20:41 PM : Nathan Y: I am glad to assist you.

4:20:56 PM : Nathan Y: Please allow me a few moments to check your account.

4:22:06 PM : Nathan Y: Can I have your account PIN or the security answer of your question?

4:22:11 PM : Nathan Y: Street you grew up on?

4:22:21 PM : 1430:

4:23:11 PM : Nathan Y: Please confirm me the phone line you want to change the plan and want to activate the phone?

4:23:29 PM : 1430:

4:23:36 PM : 1430: The phone is an HTC Hero

4:23:41 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

4:24:36 PM : Nathan Y: So, you want to change the Plan to Everything Data 450 for $69.99?

4:25:21 PM : 1430: Actually, we want to change the following:

4:25:29 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

4:25:41 PM : 1430: 1) We want to change our plan to the Everything Data Family (1500 minutes, Unlimited Data)

4:26:01 PM : Nathan Y: Ok. That's fine.

4:26:07 PM : 1430: 2) I would like to remove the equipment replacement insurance from the line

4:26:23 PM : 1430: 3) We would also like to remove the GPS locator feature

4:26:26 PM : Nathan Y: Please allow me a few moments to check this for you.

4:26:36 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

4:27:46 PM : Nathan Y: If you want to remove the Insurance on your line, it is not possible to add the Insurance (TEP) again.

4:27:56 PM : Nathan Y: Is this ok with you?

4:28:15 PM : 1430: That's fine. We have another phone exactly like the one on line should that phone fail or be lost.

4:28:36 PM : Nathan Y: Ok. Please allow me a few moments.

4:30:51 PM : Nathan Y: There is a feature of Sprint family locator. If I am correct, do you want to remove this family locator from line?

4:31:11 PM : 1430: Yes

4:31:36 PM : Nathan Y: I am removed the (TEP) from phone line.

4:31:41 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

4:32:41 PM : Nathan Y: I have also removed the Sprint family locator from the line.

4:33:42 PM : Nathan Y: Please allow me a few moments to change the plan to Everything Data Family 1500 ($129.99).

4:33:59 PM : 1430: Ok

4:35:02 PM : Nathan Y: To avoid the partial charges on your account, I suggest you change the Plan on first day of the next bill cycle that is on 21 July, 2010.

4:35:44 PM : Nathan Y: Do you want to still change the Plan to Everything Data Family?

4:35:51 PM : 1430: I don't believe I can activate my phone without changing my plan, can I?

4:36:47 PM : Nathan Y: No, the plan has to be changed to activate the HTC Hero phone

4:37:37 PM : Nathan Y: Actually the partial charges are ::-

4:37:37 PM : Nathan Y: The Monthly Service Charge for each plan is calculated with the number of days in the billing period the plan is active on.

4:38:26 PM : Nathan Y: If you want I can change the Plan to Everything Data Family.

4:38:35 PM : 1430: I was under the assumption that should we update the plan, that for the remainder of the cycle we'd have the difference in our new plan subtracted from the difference of the old plan

4:39:20 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

4:39:32 PM : 1430: Given that our bills are normally 83 dollars or so, pre tax, the extra bill for roughly half a cycle should be 129.99-83 divided by two or roughly 23 dollars in extra charges.

4:41:12 PM : Nathan Y: Let me help you to understand this.

4:41:32 PM : Nathan Y: The account will get the credit for the unused period of old service plan.

4:42:09 PM : Nathan Y: Also, the pro-rated charge of the new plan and one month advance monthly charge will be charged for the new plan.

4:42:39 PM : 1430: Would this not be the case if I waited until the 21st?

4:43:05 PM : 1430: (Referencing the one month advance charge)

4:43:22 PM : Nathan Y: That's right, the account will not be charged for the pro-rated if you waited for the July 21, 2010.

4:44:08 PM : Nathan Y: The pro-rated charges are not additional charges, however, these charges are partial charges for the service plans.

4:44:50 PM : 1430: I understand the need for pro-rated charges. I also understand the need for advance charges upon connecting new service. Such things happen all the time with utilities

4:45:02 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

4:45:20 PM : 1430: What I'm finding illogical is the need to surcharge me a month should I activate now and yet not do so should I activate in two weeks

4:46:15 PM : 1430: That just seems like a way for the company to gain more money from its customers by bringing in capital over the short term so that it can falsely represent its earnings

4:47:42 PM : Nathan Y: It's does not mean that your account will be charged additional for activating a new phone.

4:48:02 PM : Nathan Y: You will get the credit for the old service plan based on the unused period.

4:48:52 PM : Nathan Y: Also, the pro-rated charge will be billed for the new plan.

4:49:14 PM : Nathan Y: In addition, the new plan advance monthly charge will be billed for next month.

4:49:20 PM : 1430: So, which of the following will happen:

4:49:32 PM : 1430: Provided I activate today

4:50:33 PM : 1430: A) I am charged the pro-rated fee (I know of this), the one month advance charge, and I'm charged the next month's bill upon the first day of the billing cycle (which for me is the 21st)

4:50:35 PM : 1430: or

4:51:25 PM : 1430: B) I am charged the pro-rated fee, the one month advance charge, and that charge serves as my bill which would have been posted on the 21st.

4:51:56 PM : Nathan Y: The following charges will be billed, if you choose to activate the phone today:

4:52:19 PM : 1430: Essentially, what I want to avoid is paying the one month advance charge AND another bill on the 21st. Because if so, I'm essentially paying an extra month of service for no reason

4:52:27 PM : Nathan Y: The credit of $27.53 from July 06-July 20 for the old plan.

4:53:07 PM : Nathan Y: This credit is for the unused period.

4:53:42 PM : Nathan Y: Then pro-rated charge of $60.66 for the new plan from July 06-July 20, 2010.

4:54:02 PM : Nathan Y: After that next month charge of new plan $129.99 will be billed on your account.

4:55:05 PM : 1430: And what then happens on the next billing cycle (the 21st)?

4:55:57 PM : Nathan Y: Then next bill cycle, you will be charged $129.99 for next month and it keeps continue.

4:56:27 PM : Nathan Y: So, the monthly charge is always billed one month in advance.

4:56:52 PM : 1430: That would make sense if I were a new customer, but I’m not

4:57:07 PM : 1430: I'm already paying a pro-rated bill, if such a formula applies

4:57:22 PM : Nathan Y: It is always billed by every service provider.

4:57:59 PM : 1430: I'm not disputing the fact that service providers operate that way, I'm the one who established that earlier in the conversation when I mentioned how utility companies operate

4:58:31 PM : 1430: What I'm disputing is the fact that I am currently a Sprint customer

4:58:38 PM : 1430: Because of this, I am paying a pro-rated bill

4:58:57 PM : Nathan Y: I appreciate you for choosing Sprint as your wireless provider.

4:59:21 PM : Nathan Y: However, had it been possible for me to avoid this charge, I would have surely done it for you.

4:59:24 PM : 1430: Why then, would I need to be surcharged again, when I am already paying a bill that is applied in advance of future services rendered

5:00:17 PM : Nathan Y: You have already paid the advance monthly charge for the old plan and therefore you will get the credit of the old plan for unused period.

5:00:52 PM : Nathan Y: Since that advance charge will be credited, you will be charged one month in advance for the new plan.

5:01:07 PM : Nathan Y: This is how it works. I appreciate your understanding.

5:01:15 PM : 1430: Do you realize how myopic that business model is?

5:01:43 PM : 1430: You are essentially costing yourself the revenue that you would get from me upgrading today and paying for a higher plan

5:02:14 PM : 1430: Because I can wait two weeks and upgrade to a new bill without surcharges

5:02:47 PM : Nathan Y: Let me discuss your case with my supervisor to check the best I can do for you.

5:06:17 PM : Nathan Y: I am sorry for the delay. Please allow me a few more moments. I'll be right back.

5:09:43 PM : Nathan Y: I discussed your case with my supervisor and convinced him to offer the credit of pro-rated charge of new plan which will be approximately $60.66 and the credit of $27.53 will be reversed of the old plan.

5:10:36 PM : 1430: I'm sorry, these ESL errors make understanding difficult

5:11:27 PM : Nathan Y: I apologize for the inconvenience caused due to this. So, the credit of $60.66 will be applied for the pro-rated charge of new plan.

5:11:42 PM : Nathan Y: You will be only charged for the new plan monthly charge of $129.99.

5:11:52 PM : Nathan Y: I hope this make things more clear.

5:12:27 PM : 1430: I'm still getting charged significantly more than I would if I just waited two weeks.

5:12:39 PM : 1430: I'm gonna have to say no to that offer.

5:12:52 PM : Nathan Y: Ok.

5:13:31 PM : 1430: If this were done in an intelligent manner, you would charge your customers the difference of their plans for the remainder of the cycle given that they are existing customers

5:13:32 PM : Nathan Y: I am sorry; this is the best I can offer you as of now.

5:13:38 PM : Nathan Y: I appreciate your understanding.

5:14:33 PM : 1430: But this is Sprint, so expecting common sense is like asking you to perfect cold fusion with a table leg, a fish carcass, and a Zippo.

5:14:33 PM : Nathan Y: The advance monthly charge cannot be removed, it will be billed upon change of the plan in the mid of the bill cycle.

5:16:03 PM : Nathan Y: To better assist you with your concern, I can transfer your chat to my supervisor.

5:16:35 PM : 1430: It's irrelevant if you are insistent upon charging me a full month surcharge in the middle of a billing cycle

5:18:53 PM : Nathan Y: I apologize for the inconvenience, but the charges are valid, if you want I can clarify this from my supervisor

5:19:20 PM : Nathan Y: Or if you want I can also arrange a call for you.

5:20:07 PM : 1430: I'm not saying the charges are a pyramid scheme, I'm saying that the execution of such charges now, but not two weeks from now, only serves to undercut your own business. It's a self-defeating model that relies on the ignorance of the clientele in order to survive and wreaks havoc upon your customer service.

5:22:08 PM : Nathan Y: I understand and appreciate your feedback. However, I have already offered you the credit of $60.66 for the pro-rated charges looking at your long-term association with us.

5:22:41 PM : 1430: Did you know that Ted Bundy's first dog was a collie, named Lassie?

5:24:25 PM : 1430: I'm out. Do not change my plan, I will talk to a flesh and blood human being that can actually rectify the situation (assuming sense prevails).

5:24:53 PM : Nathan Y: I am sorry for the inconvenience.

5:25:14 PM : 1430: I am sorry for Bhopal

5:25:45 PM : Nathan Y: I will not change the plan on your account.

5:26:40 PM : 1430: We've established that

5:26:44 PM : Nathan Y: Please understand my limitations, as I already discussed your issue with my supervisor.

5:26:55 PM : 1430: I'm well aware of the limitations

5:27:12 PM : 1430: I'm ranting at the institution, not the individual within the instituion

5:27:18 PM : 1430: They are discreet entities.

5:27:24 PM : 1430: *discrete

5:27:24 PM : Nathan Y: If you want, I can also arrange a call for you from the supervisor at a convenient time.

5:27:37 PM : 1430: Don't worry about it. There is a Sprint Store in my town.

5:28:15 PM : Nathan Y: I have also added the account notes so, you need not tell to him about your concern.

5:28:45 PM : Nathan Y: I understand your frustration and regret the inconvenience you may have experienced as a result of this issue.

5:29:14 PM : 1430: Conflict mediation via photons and binary language, FTW!!

[DeezNutz]

I had a particularly frustrating exchange with a representative for a conglomerate recently, and I actually used the phrase, "Do you understand the words coming out of my mouth?"

[DaFace]

I've just about given up on Sprint's chat support. Half the time, my conversations have ended with "call this number - they can help you."

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I almost felt bad about the Bhopal reference. Almost.

[CaliforniaChief]

"I'm sorry for Bhopal"

[pr_capone]

Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins

5:14:33 PM : 1430: But this is Sprint, so expecting common sense is like asking you to perfect cold fusion with a table leg, a fish carcass, and a Zippo.

LMFAO

[Silock]

I never understood people that yelled at CS representatives who obviously had no control over company policy.

[NewChief]

Originally Posted by Silock

I never understood people that yelled at CS representatives who obviously had no control over company policy.

He says as much in the chat.

[bevischief]

Welcome to Ericsson, be glad you where not moved to another call center in another country with no notes from the earlier conversation.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

5:24:53 PM : Nathan Y: I am sorry for the inconvenience.

5:25:14 PM : 1430: I am sorry for Bhopal

Now THAT, is one of the best lines I've ever seen in a CS rant and I'm fully going to steal it.

[CaliforniaChief]

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts

Now THAT, is one of the best lines I've ever seen in a CS rant and I'm fully going to steal it.

Agreed. It was epic. If that didn't break poor Nathan off of his script, nothing would have.

[vailpass]

I'm impressed at your desire and ability to type that much for a bb post.

[Reaper16]

Originally Posted by vailpass

I'm impressed at your desire and ability to type that much for a bb post.

Copy/paste.

[OnTheWarpath15]

Not sure which I like better:

5:22:41 PM : 1430: Did you know that Ted Bundy's first dog was a collie, named Lassie?

Or:

5:24:53 PM : Nathan Y: I am sorry for the inconvenience.

5:25:14 PM : 1430: I am sorry for Bhopal

[teedubya]

Not sure why I read all of that.