Cowboy wants a beer (off-color joke - you've been warned)

JazzzLovr · 08-18-2005, 07:49 PM

I didn't want to take the time to hunt down the Friday goof-off thread. This is copied and pasted exactly how it arrived in my email, although I find it difficult to believe that a cowboy would actually use the term "wee-wee." But anyway...

-----

A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in he realizes it's a gay bar.

"But what the heck," he says to himself, "I really want a drink." When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, "What's the name of your wee-wee?"

The cowboy says, "Look, I'm not into any of that, all I want is a drink."

The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your wee-wee.

Mine for instance is called Nike, for the slogan 'Just Do It,' and that guy down at the end of the bar calls his, Snickers, because it really 'Satisfies'."

The cowboy looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over.

So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of yours?"

The man looks back and says with a smile "Timex," and the thirsty cowboy asks, "Why Timex?" The fella proudly replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'!"

A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fellas on his right, who happen to be sharing a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you guys call yours?" The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because Quality is Job One." Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford lately?"

The guy next to him then says, "I call mine CHEVY, 'Like A Rock'." and gives a wink.

Even more shaken the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name.

He exclaims, "The name of my wee-wee is 'SECRET'. Now give me a beer."

The bartender begins to pour the Cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asked " Why Secret?"

The cowboy says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"

**KC Dan** · 08-18-2005, 07:59 PM

Whatever has that young man done to you? My word.........

JazzzLovr · 08-18-2005, 08:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KC Dan

Whatever has that young man done to you? My word.........

Yeah, because I was so innocent before...

Actually, that email came from the co-worker that sits in the cubicle next to me. David had nothing to do with this particular corruption.

PastorMikH · 08-18-2005, 09:03 PM

Wow, I am like so offended by this. Phobia, I would like to request that you take action against this tasteless garbage and I also think that you should ban that Jazzzlover dude for posting it.

tk13 · 08-18-2005, 09:07 PM

Ban this newbie. Don't need this tasteless stuff on our family friendly board.

08-18-2005, 09:11 PM

I've banned the dude a million times. He keeps coming back with some other variation of Jazzzzzzzlovr.

tk13 · 08-18-2005, 09:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phobia

I've banned the dude a million times. He keeps coming back with some other variation of Jazzzzzzzlovr.

Darn. That's bad news. I say we send raiderhader after him then... he does a lot of NyQuil, and it helps you get your Z's.

**KC Dan** · 08-18-2005, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tk13

Darn. That's bad news. I say we send raiderhader after him then... he does a lot of NyQuil, and it helps you get your Z's.

Plus, Phil could pick him up and swing him like a weapon. You know a tree branch, twig, etc...

08-18-2005, 09:15 PM

Oh damn. No, you didn't. OMG. Groan.

C-Mac · 08-18-2005, 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phobia

Oh damn. No, you didn't. OMG. Groan.

See....now your inviting trouble.
No, I dont have a name for mine but a friend of mines cousin knew a guy who named his once.

**Reaper16** · 08-18-2005, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by C-Mac

See....now your inviting trouble.
No, I dont have a name for mine but a friend of mines cousin knew a guy who named his once.

I have a friend who named his piece "Gustav." Further baffling is the fact that's he's a sane man, well-adjusted to society's mores, and sexually comfortable despite naming his schlong "Gustav."

Hammock Parties · 08-18-2005, 11:58 PM

tk13 rules!

08-18-2005, 07:49 PM	Topic Starter
JazzzLovr Old timer Join Date: Jan 2002 Casino cash: $10004925	Cowboy wants a beer (off-color joke - you've been warned) I didn't want to take the time to hunt down the Friday goof-off thread. This is copied and pasted exactly how it arrived in my email, although I find it difficult to believe that a cowboy would actually use the term "wee-wee." But anyway... ----- A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in he realizes it's a gay bar. "But what the heck," he says to himself, "I really want a drink." When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, "What's the name of your wee-wee?" The cowboy says, "Look, I'm not into any of that, all I want is a drink." The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your wee-wee. Mine for instance is called Nike, for the slogan 'Just Do It,' and that guy down at the end of the bar calls his, Snickers, because it really 'Satisfies'." The cowboy looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over. So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of yours?" The man looks back and says with a smile "Timex," and the thirsty cowboy asks, "Why Timex?" The fella proudly replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'!" A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fellas on his right, who happen to be sharing a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you guys call yours?" The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because Quality is Job One." Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford lately?" The guy next to him then says, "I call mine CHEVY, 'Like A Rock'." and gives a wink. Even more shaken the Cowboy has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name. He exclaims, "The name of my wee-wee is 'SECRET'. Now give me a beer." The bartender begins to pour the Cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asked " Why Secret?" The cowboy says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"
Posts: 8,156

08-18-2005, 07:59 PM	#2
KC Dan Red, White & Blue for the U.S. Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: The Great Northwest now.. Casino cash: $-2025765	Whatever has that young man done to you? My word......... __________________ "And if you don't know where you're going Any road will take you there" - George Harrison
Posts: 7,087

08-18-2005, 09:03 PM	#4
PastorMikH Will KC ever be better? Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Land of Red Dirt & Necks Casino cash: $9905087	Wow, I am like so offended by this. Phobia, I would like to request that you take action against this tasteless garbage and I also think that you should ban that Jazzzlover dude for posting it. __________________
Posts: 20,454

08-18-2005, 09:07 PM	#5
tk13 ... Join Date: Nov 2001 Casino cash: $-1667500	Ban this newbie. Don't need this tasteless stuff on our family friendly board.
Posts: 56,594

08-18-2005, 09:11 PM	#6
Phobia Guest Casino cash: $	I've banned the dude a million times. He keeps coming back with some other variation of Jazzzzzzzlovr.
Posts: n/a

08-18-2005, 09:15 PM	#9
Phobia Guest Casino cash: $	Oh damn. No, you didn't. OMG. Groan.
Posts: n/a

08-18-2005, 11:58 PM	#12
Hammock Parties I'll be back. Join Date: Nov 2002 Casino cash: $1030478	tk13 rules! __________________ Chiefs game films
Posts: 296,719