Beware of Angry Asian Girlfriends - Page 3

**CosmicPal** · 02-13-2005, 08:23 PM

Well, I just woke up from three days of partying that started Thursday night and culminated with last night's fiasco. My head hurts and my body aches for reasons other than the abuse of alcohol.

Some of you may recall my short-lived post regarding a date with a hot Asian chick I met a couple of weeks ago. Well, she's been nothing short of a spectacular, and quite honestly, some of the best damn sex I've ever had.

Well, last week, I get a call from an old girlfriend in KC. Turns out she's now divorced and some of her guy pals are coming for the weekend to do some skiing up in Vail. She wanted to know if I would like to hook up with her as she just wanted to hang in Denver and let the guys go skiing. I said, "Sure, we'll definately have to get together."

Anyways, so I tell my Ninja bed-buddy I'll be out of town this weekend and for her to make other plans. She was cool with that. My ex-girlfriend and I go out last night and we hooked up for some late afternoon drinking and catching-up. With the night still young, I suggest we go back to my place for some wine and some TV. She accepts my invitation, and so we go back to my place.

When I walk into my house- there's my Ninja boyfriend beater on the couch. She gets up and starts screaming at me in her poor English. It was like an intolerably bad Japenese film. I was shocked 'cause she doesn't have the keys to my house, and I didn't know if she had broken in or what. Needless to say, she's pissed. During her act of screaming at me, I try to calm her down and tell her that the female on my right arm happens to be an old friend from out of town. Well, my Ninja baby didn't by that and before I could say, "OH, s..." I hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. Within say, .08 seconds, my Ninja lover sent a furry of arms and legs at me. She killed CosmicPal. I was in some great deal of pain- writhing on my own living room floor watching the feet of the best sex stomp out my front door.

Of course, none of this went over well with my ex-girlfriend. So, she called a cab while I polished off a bottle of wine myself with an ice pack to my groin. I'm awake now. I screwed up again.

**Mr. Kotter** · 02-13-2005, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amnorix

Rep just for admitting all this.

Rep? Hell, he ought to be banned.

**Rain Man** · 02-13-2005, 10:15 PM

Of course, the Asian chick might not have been that great a catch if, as cosmic claims, her arms and legs were furry.

Mosbonian · 02-13-2005, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Of course, the Asian chick might not have been that great a catch if, as cosmic claims, her arms and legs were furry.

I didn't catch that until you pointed that out....

mmaddog
*******

go bo · 02-13-2005, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Kotter

You got your clock cleaned by a chick?

And you posted it here?

And I'm a drama-queen.

what do they call that?

a trifecta?

go bo · 02-13-2005, 10:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Of course, the Asian chick might not have been that great a catch if, as cosmic claims, her arms and legs were furry.

hey, what's a little fur here and there?

PastorMikH · 02-13-2005, 10:39 PM

I've always thought dudes were better off dating women that couldn't whip them. Consider yourself lucky to find this out now. Had you waited until after you were married to know that she could whip you, the relationship probably wouldn't end so easily and you could turn into one of those rare battered husbands that's afraid to leave the wife and has to keep being subjected to her violent ways.

go bo · 02-13-2005, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PastorMikH

I've always thought dudes were better off dating women that couldn't whip them. Consider yourself lucky to find this out now. Had you waited until after you were married to know that she could whip you, the relationship probably wouldn't end so easily and you could turn into one of those rare battered husbands that's afraid to leave the wife and has to keep being subjected to her violent ways.

yeppers...

he's already a battered boyfriend...

it's a short step to battered husband...

[creepy music]be careful cosmic...

be very, very cafeful...[/creepy music]

BIG_DADDY · 02-13-2005, 11:19 PM

She is Chinese you freak, not Japanese, ninja isn't an issue.

02-13-2005, 11:29 PM

Dude, seek help.

How many presses of 5 lbs can you do?

KCWolfman · 02-14-2005, 06:54 AM

Let's recap - Screw girl, go out with old friend, go home with friend, find girl broke into your house, and girl kicks your ass?

I must have missed something here.

Fairplay · 02-14-2005, 07:02 AM

Some stories are better left unsaid.

**CosmicPal** · 02-14-2005, 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PastorMikH

I've always thought dudes were better off dating women that couldn't whip them. Consider yourself lucky to find this out now. Had you waited until after you were married to know that she could whip you, the relationship probably wouldn't end so easily and you could turn into one of those rare battered husbands that's afraid to leave the wife and has to keep being subjected to her violent ways.

True, but I never planned on marrying her. I really wasn't even that interested in dating her. She was nothing more than a sexual adventure and she obviously wanted more. Her broken English didn't go over well with me...

**CosmicPal** · 02-14-2005, 07:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phobia

Dude, seek help.

How many presses of 5 lbs can you do?

I can handle myself pretty well, thank you. When you're drunk and you have a gal standing next to you and you're not expecting someone to hit you- well, you're just not prepared for what will happen next.

I've had plenty of past girlfriends yell at me, but I've never had anyone hit me before- particularly a drop kick to the freakin groin.

**Bwana** · 02-14-2005, 08:28 AM

Dude

BTW: Did you ever figure out "HOW" she got in your house?

**ptlyon** · 02-14-2005, 08:32 AM

If there were a song written for this, I'm sure it would go something like this...

Dang - it won't attach.

02-13-2005, 08:23 PM
CosmicPal Learn it. Know it. Live it. Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: St. Petersburg, FL Casino cash: $10004900	Beware of Angry Asian Girlfriends Well, I just woke up from three days of partying that started Thursday night and culminated with last night's fiasco. My head hurts and my body aches for reasons other than the abuse of alcohol. Some of you may recall my short-lived post regarding a date with a hot Asian chick I met a couple of weeks ago. Well, she's been nothing short of a spectacular, and quite honestly, some of the best damn sex I've ever had. Well, last week, I get a call from an old girlfriend in KC. Turns out she's now divorced and some of her guy pals are coming for the weekend to do some skiing up in Vail. She wanted to know if I would like to hook up with her as she just wanted to hang in Denver and let the guys go skiing. I said, "Sure, we'll definately have to get together." Anyways, so I tell my Ninja bed-buddy I'll be out of town this weekend and for her to make other plans. She was cool with that. My ex-girlfriend and I go out last night and we hooked up for some late afternoon drinking and catching-up. With the night still young, I suggest we go back to my place for some wine and some TV. She accepts my invitation, and so we go back to my place. When I walk into my house- there's my Ninja boyfriend beater on the couch. She gets up and starts screaming at me in her poor English. It was like an intolerably bad Japenese film. I was shocked 'cause she doesn't have the keys to my house, and I didn't know if she had broken in or what. Needless to say, she's pissed. During her act of screaming at me, I try to calm her down and tell her that the female on my right arm happens to be an old friend from out of town. Well, my Ninja baby didn't by that and before I could say, "OH, s..." I hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. Within say, .08 seconds, my Ninja lover sent a furry of arms and legs at me. She killed CosmicPal. I was in some great deal of pain- writhing on my own living room floor watching the feet of the best sex stomp out my front door. Of course, none of this went over well with my ex-girlfriend. So, she called a cab while I polished off a bottle of wine myself with an ice pack to my groin. I'm awake now. I screwed up again.
Posts: 10,840

02-13-2005, 10:15 PM	#32
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-632449 VARSITY	Of course, the Asian chick might not have been that great a catch if, as cosmic claims, her arms and legs were furry. __________________ Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history.
Posts: 145,434

02-13-2005, 10:39 PM	#36
PastorMikH Will KC ever be better? Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Land of Red Dirt & Necks Casino cash: $9905087	I've always thought dudes were better off dating women that couldn't whip them. Consider yourself lucky to find this out now. Had you waited until after you were married to know that she could whip you, the relationship probably wouldn't end so easily and you could turn into one of those rare battered husbands that's afraid to leave the wife and has to keep being subjected to her violent ways. __________________
Posts: 20,454

02-13-2005, 11:19 PM	#38
BIG_DADDY THE RED MENACE Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texas Casino cash: $2558410	She is Chinese you freak, not Japanese, ninja isn't an issue. __________________ The diabolical genius of Marxism-Socialism is that it provides the emotional and intellectual road map for autocrats to persuade millions of people to support their own enslavement to government. ~Mark Levin April 15, 2019
Posts: 32,522

02-13-2005, 11:29 PM	#39
Phobia Guest Casino cash: $	Dude, seek help. How many presses of 5 lbs can you do?
Posts: n/a

02-14-2005, 06:54 AM	#40
KCWolfman Fall down 7 times, get up 8 Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $10004900	Let's recap - Screw girl, go out with old friend, go home with friend, find girl broke into your house, and girl kicks your ass? I must have missed something here.
Posts: 15,474

02-14-2005, 07:02 AM	#41
Fairplay A certain set of skills Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: texas Casino cash: $10026683 VARSITY	Some stories are better left unsaid.
Posts: 25,265

02-14-2005, 08:28 AM	#44
Bwana It's Five O'Clock Somewhere Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Billings, Montana Casino cash: $2135883647	Dude BTW: Did you ever figure out "HOW" she got in your house? __________________ Adventure is dangerous....but monotony can kill you.
Posts: 70,486

02-14-2005, 08:32 AM	#45
ptlyon Bono & Grbac wasn't enough Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Sioux City, IA Casino cash: $9283829	If there were a song written for this, I'm sure it would go something like this... Dang - it won't attach. __________________ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Advertise here: $19.99 a month
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