Marriage, divorce, etc... - Page 8

Jenson71 · 10-17-2005, 08:24 PM

Hi. I've fallen in love in the past few months. And I've been thinking about marriage. I also read beer me's thread about his ex-wife and I got to thinking about that.

So here's a poll.

angel · 10-18-2005, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by htismaqe

Ahhh...the sweet smell of idealism.

How old are ya, 21? 22?

25

and yes, I know about Santa and the Easter Bunny...
they don't bring presents to you once you're 21

keg in kc · 10-18-2005, 02:29 PM

Ohh, "lazy and has no ambition". God, I shouldn't let myself get started on that.

Not everybody is built to be a captain of industry, and not everybody values the same kind of things, or wants the same stuff out of life. I'll use myself for an example. I have one dream right now: I want to write a novel. Why? To prove to myself that I can do it. Not that selling it wouldn't be a nice thing, too, of course. But I'm more interesting in proving something to myself. That's my one and only ambition.

Problem is, no matter how much I work at it, I'm not going to make any money for the hours I spend working toward that goal. Not now.

But, in the eyes of...everybody (including myself, sometimes, because peer pressure is a bitch, even at my old age), I'm lazy. No ambition. The general consensus is that I should give up this one thing that I want in my life and step onto the corprate treadmill, while away my life doing something I don't give a damn about.

And that bugs me, sometimes. What is life supposed to be about, and when did "happiness" or even "contentness" stop being a part of that?

But I digress. I've got to take myself to my "real" job now, and do something I'm really sick of doing for the next 6 or 8 hours, something I don't care a whit about except for the fact that I believe that whatever kind of work I do, it has to be good.

htismaqe · 10-18-2005, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by angel

25

and yes, I know about Santa and the Easter Bunny...
they don't bring presents to you once you're 21

25 and idealistic...

MMMMMMMMMMMMMM

htismaqe · 10-18-2005, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc

Ohh, "lazy and has no ambition". God, I shouldn't let myself get started on that.

Not everybody is built to be a captain of industry, and not everybody values the same kind of things, or wants the same stuff out of life. I'll use myself for an example. I have one dream right now: I want to write a novel. Why? To prove to myself that I can do it. Not that selling it wouldn't be a nice thing, too, of course. But I'm more interesting in proving something to myself. That's my one and only ambition.

Problem is, no matter how much I work at it, I'm not going to make any money for the hours I spend working toward that goal. Not now.

But, in the eyes of...everybody (including myself, sometimes, because peer pressure is a bitch, even at my old age), I'm lazy. No ambition. The general consensus is that I should give up this one thing that I want in my life and step onto the corprate treadmill, while away my life doing something I don't give a damn about.

And that bugs me, sometimes. What is life supposed to be about, and when did "happiness" or even "contentness" stop being a part of that?

But I digress. I've got to take myself to my "real" job now, and do something I'm really sick of doing for the next 6 or 8 hours, something I don't care a whit about except for the fact that I believe that whatever kind of work I do, it has to be good.

Dude, I'm pretty lazy with very little ambition. But I know you're smart, and alot of times that can overcome laziness and then some. Sometimes, you just have to pick your battles.

I gave up my "dream" (my full-time band) to go corporate. I worked 70 hours a week getting good at what I did and taking advantage of the fact that the one skill I have is that I'm a mental sponge.

Now I make good money, never work overtime, and basically get to surf the Planet all day. And now, not only have I restarted my band, but I've got multiple guitars, the amp I always wanted, recording equipment, PA equipment, etc., all financed by my "day job". Stuff that I could never afford before...

Katipan · 10-18-2005, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc

Ohh, "lazy and has no ambition". God, I shouldn't let myself get started on that.

Not everybody is built to be a captain of industry, and not everybody values the same kind of things, or wants the same stuff out of life. I'll use myself for an example. I have one dream right now: I want to write a novel. Why? To prove to myself that I can do it. Not that selling it wouldn't be a nice thing, too, of course. But I'm more interesting in proving something to myself. That's my one and only ambition.

Problem is, no matter how much I work at it, I'm not going to make any money for the hours I spend working toward that goal. Not now.

But, in the eyes of...everybody (including myself, sometimes, because peer pressure is a bitch, even at my old age), I'm lazy. No ambition. The general consensus is that I should give up this one thing that I want in my life and step onto the corprate treadmill, while away my life doing something I don't give a damn about.

And that bugs me, sometimes. What is life supposed to be about, and when did "happiness" or even "contentness" stop being a part of that?

But I digress. I've got to take myself to my "real" job now, and do something I'm really sick of doing for the next 6 or 8 hours, something I don't care a whit about except for the fact that I believe that whatever kind of work I do, it has to be good.

See, I don't like the people around you. I think I'd like to give them a swift kick in the nuts.

I want to write a book. But I'm in my late 20s. I look at it as I have all the time in the world. Right now my life is about building the foundation for my kids until I send them off to school. Then it'll be all about my dreams.

If anyone has called me anything negative because I've delayed a goal, it certainly wasn't anywhere I could hear it.

TIIIIIIIIIIIME is on your side.

keg in kc · 10-18-2005, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by htismaqe

Now I make good money, never work overtime, and basically get to surf the Planet all day. And now, not only have I restarted my band, but I've got multiple guitars, the amp I always wanted, recording equipment, PA equipment, etc., all financed by my "day job". Stuff that I could never afford before...

Well, right now I "work" about 1 month out of every 3 - that's where the "lazy" talk comes in - and make enough in that one month to live for 3-4. The down side is the risk of projects falling through, no health/dental and when I do have to work, I work very, very long hours But I have all the time in the world when I'm not on a project to work on things that are important to me, namely getting my weight and health under control and developing my writing skills.

And I have no real problem with that. Until people start nagging me about it. Apparently I'm somehow...less, because I decide to work smarter rather than longer. And that just sets me off. I'm even getting it from my family occasionally, now.

But we're on a tangent here: the central issue was the money. As long as writing is my goal, money will be tight. So I sacrifice dating for it, too.

htismaqe · 10-18-2005, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc

Well, right now I "work" about 1 month out of every 3 - that's where the "lazy" talk comes in - and make enough in that one month to live for 3-4. The down side is the risk of projects falling through, no health/dental and when I do have to work, I work very, very long hours But I have all the time in the world when I'm not on a project to work on things that are important to me, namely getting my weight and health under control and developing my writing skills.

And I have no real problem with that. Until people start nagging me about it. Apparently I'm somehow...less, because I decide to work smarter rather than longer.

Well, those people can honestly fug off. If they *really* think blindly working hard without any ingenuity is gonna pay off, they're pretty naive. This ain't the 50's anymore.

stevieray · 10-18-2005, 03:01 PM

first off, don't take any advice from someone who hasn't had a successful marriage.

Second, don't take any advice from someone who has a successful marriage.

keg in kc · 10-18-2005, 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevieray

first off, don't take any advice from someone who hasn't had a successful marriage.

Second, don't take any advice from someone who has a successful marriage.

It's all individual anyway. What works for some won't work for others, and vice-versa. But it's interesting tossing tales of battle back and forth across the campfire.

And my lazy, unambitious ass really needs to log-off. This is ridiculous. I'll be working until midnight. Dumbass.

htismaqe · 10-18-2005, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevieray

first off, don't take any advice from someone who hasn't had a successful marriage.

Second, don't take any advice from someone who has a successful marriage.

Brilliant!

DJay23 · 10-18-2005, 04:54 PM

I'm 28. Not married. I've broken hearts, and had mine broken. I've been in love and been cheated on. I've casually dated and had casual sex. I've tried just about every relationship a man and woman can have with the exception of marriage. And now recently I've met someone who I could see as the one. But I'll let it play out. And that is my advice as a single man. Take things a day at a time. Allow yourself to live life instead of letting life live you. (hmm, not sure quite what that means).

Jenson71 · 10-18-2005, 05:46 PM

Thanks for all the replies so far.

Most important to know, is I am not thinking directly about sexual thoughts with her. I want to, and so does she, but we both agree we're just not gonna do it. I have never been too much of a womanizer, and have only liked (liked) one other girl besides her. This one though, I was determined to do something about. I wouldn't have lived with myself if I hadn't.

If that makes me less of a man to some of you, that's fine, it won't hurt my feelings.

I agree with the waiting part. Again, I don't plan on marrying til after college, it's just not practical and "healthy", I guess could be the word.

I am 17, I am a senior in high school, and I do think I'm better than the average male in this country. I'm just being honest.

nychief · 10-18-2005, 05:55 PM

How many ****ing times has this thread come up? I swear he was waxing poetical and threatening marriage a couple of months ago - am I wrong?

Jenson71 · 10-18-2005, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nychief

How many ****ing times has this thread come up? I swear he was waxing poetical and threatening marriage a couple of months ago - am I wrong?

Who me?

Yes, this is the 5'9", curvy, strawberry blonde girl I talked about earlier this summer. One time we were hanging out and she told me her secret of why she avoided me with the movie. She didn't want me to kiss her, she says she would have been freaked out. She's pretty innocent. Obviously, she doesn't mind kissing me now though.

Hammock Parties · 10-18-2005, 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jenson71

I do think I'm better than the average male in this country. .

You and Fire Me Boy! should get together and watch some "films."

View Poll Results: Which one?
I've been married once, still to the same person.	55	44.35%
I'm divorced and single.	17	13.71%
I'm divorced and have remarried.	22	17.74%
I have never married.	24	19.35%
I'm a different option (please explain)	6	4.84%
Voters: 124. You may not vote on this poll

10-17-2005, 08:24 PM
Jenson71 fides quaerens intellectum Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: United States Casino cash: $8330900	Marriage, divorce, etc... Hi. I've fallen in love in the past few months. And I've been thinking about marriage. I also read beer me's thread about his ex-wife and I got to thinking about that. So here's a poll.
Posts: 15,986

10-18-2005, 02:29 PM	#107
keg in kc oxymoron Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: OP/KC/Whatever Casino cash: $9556299	Ohh, "lazy and has no ambition". God, I shouldn't let myself get started on that. Not everybody is built to be a captain of industry, and not everybody values the same kind of things, or wants the same stuff out of life. I'll use myself for an example. I have one dream right now: I want to write a novel. Why? To prove to myself that I can do it. Not that selling it wouldn't be a nice thing, too, of course. But I'm more interesting in proving something to myself. That's my one and only ambition. Problem is, no matter how much I work at it, I'm not going to make any money for the hours I spend working toward that goal. Not now. But, in the eyes of...everybody (including myself, sometimes, because peer pressure is a bitch, even at my old age), I'm lazy. No ambition. The general consensus is that I should give up this one thing that I want in my life and step onto the corprate treadmill, while away my life doing something I don't give a damn about. And that bugs me, sometimes. What is life supposed to be about, and when did "happiness" or even "contentness" stop being a part of that? But I digress. I've got to take myself to my "real" job now, and do something I'm really sick of doing for the next 6 or 8 hours, something I don't care a whit about except for the fact that I believe that whatever kind of work I do, it has to be good.
Posts: 58,682

10-18-2005, 03:01 PM	#113
stevieray Most things I worry about… Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Under Pressure Casino cash: $-1174727	first off, don't take any advice from someone who hasn't had a successful marriage. Second, don't take any advice from someone who has a successful marriage.
Posts: 74,040

10-18-2005, 04:54 PM	#116
DJay23 Rock Chalk Jayhawk Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: PA Casino cash: $-406683	I'm 28. Not married. I've broken hearts, and had mine broken. I've been in love and been cheated on. I've casually dated and had casual sex. I've tried just about every relationship a man and woman can have with the exception of marriage. And now recently I've met someone who I could see as the one. But I'll let it play out. And that is my advice as a single man. Take things a day at a time. Allow yourself to live life instead of letting life live you. (hmm, not sure quite what that means). __________________ "True bliss is not something you search for, true bliss is already living inside us all, and sometimes it takes a roomfull of others to lead us to the mirror of your soul." - CosmicPal (10-3-03)
Posts: 9,180

10-18-2005, 05:46 PM	#117
Jenson71 fides quaerens intellectum Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: United States Casino cash: $8330900	Thanks for all the replies so far. Most important to know, is I am not thinking directly about sexual thoughts with her. I want to, and so does she, but we both agree we're just not gonna do it. I have never been too much of a womanizer, and have only liked (liked) one other girl besides her. This one though, I was determined to do something about. I wouldn't have lived with myself if I hadn't. If that makes me less of a man to some of you, that's fine, it won't hurt my feelings. I agree with the waiting part. Again, I don't plan on marrying til after college, it's just not practical and "healthy", I guess could be the word. I am 17, I am a senior in high school, and I do think I'm better than the average male in this country. I'm just being honest.
Posts: 15,986

10-18-2005, 05:55 PM	#118
nychief MVP Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: NYC Casino cash: $5409466	How many ****ing times has this thread come up? I swear he was waxing poetical and threatening marriage a couple of months ago - am I wrong? __________________ Good Time Charlie, Uncle Doobie and the Great Frisco Freakout.
Posts: 8,159