Shit your wife does that MAKES YOU INSANE

[Frazod]

The first week of December, I finished my Christmas shopping. One of the gifts was a Best Buy gift card for the brother-in-law. I put it in a spot in the kitchen where it wouldn't get lost. So, I went to wrap it tonight, and GUESS WHAT - it's gone.

I didn't touch the ****ing thing. But, like every other goddamn thing that dissappears around here, the wife HAS NO IDEA WHERE IT IS AND NEVER TOUCHED IT. Just like every other damn thing that she swears she never saw or touched that I find in some maddeningly stupid-assed place that only she would put it, anywhere from a week to a year later, and always when I'm looking for something else that magically vanished in the same manner. "Wasn't me, honey. Must have been you. And why do you always blame me?"

BECAUSE YOU'RE ALWAYS THE ONE WHO ****ING LOSES THINGS!



And then, when I clearly bust her on it, she still denies it. Never an apology. Never an "I was wrong." Just I DIDN'T DO IT.



Well, I don't have a week to a year to wait for this to turn up, so I'll have to go back out at the height of last-minute-rush Christmas shopping hell and replace it (I'd make her do it, but she doesn't drive). I'M SO ****ING PISSED OFF I CAN'T SEE STRAIGHT. More money flying out of my wallet after a month that has already seen me melt my friggin credit cards into goo.

WHY DOES SHE DO THIS? WHY WHY WHY

[Brando]

Originally Posted by RedNeckRaider

Said yes to the dumbest question I ever asked

Is Kerry Collins a capable backup to Rich Gannon?

[JazzzLovr]

Originally Posted by Brando

Is Kerry Collins a capable backup to Rich Gannon?

I thought maybe he asked if those pants made his butt look fat.

[RNR]

Originally Posted by Brando

Is Kerry Collins a capable backup to Rich Gannon?

Putem up putem up!

[RNR]

Originally Posted by JazzzLovr

I thought maybe he asked if those pants made his butt look fat.

Leave my butt out of this I lost that in my divorce

[Iowanian]

I thought of something.

Your woman ever try to talk to you through the door when you're birthin a R@ider Fan?

Originally Posted by Iowanian

I thought of something.

Your woman ever try to talk to you through the door when you're birthin a R@ider Fan?

That doesn't really bother me. For some reason, I have a real problem with people seeing me wiping the afterbirth away, though. Go figure. Fortunately, this one was resolved early in the relationship by showing her the shit blots on the paper. She didn't even see an angel or anything.... Ain't happened since.

[picasso]

The fan.
My wife from the time I met her has gone to bed with a fan on. (We met in the summer) For white noise to help her sleep. That is fine - BUT NOT IN THE FRICKIN WINTER!!!! I complain about it every year and it doesn't change a thing.

Now recently I stopped smoking. It's been 2 months and I am feeling pretty good, but I have started snoring for some damn reason. Probably cause I am not inhaling all day and my breathing is out of whack. Now she's pissed at me every morning because she can't sleep.
I explain it's just intermittent white noise.

[KevB]

My wife is very cool, let's me do my thing, takes care of the kids....but after 9 years of marriage.....

I hate that we get the kids to bed, sit down to watch a movie together and she's out like a light 5 minutes in. Why not just go to bed and let me watch my mindless action adventure without the sawing wood background noise?

I hate that she gets new (nice) tennis shoes every few months because she treats them like shit. Never unlaces to put on/take off, etc. I've still got shoes from 6 years ago that look brand new, while her 1 month old shoes look like she mugged a homeless person.

I hate that she won't move into the 21st century with our finances. Still wants to write in a check register and balance manually. Um, that takes 1/2 the time and is more accurate on the computer....she'll have none of it.

Doesn't swallow....I know, I tried to set the precedent early on, but it wasn't happening. She's open to other things, so I don't push it.

Plays the "wait 'till Daddy gets home" card with the kids. Yet, disapproves when I yell at them. Well, the reason they listen to me is because there is a hint of fear. That fear comes from my ability to become visibly angry in a matter of seconds. Perfected by watching the Chiefs BTW.

Having said all of this, I couldn't ask for a better mate and mother to my children. I'm sure her list about me is longer than this entire thread....

[JazzzLovr]

Originally Posted by picasso

I explain it's just intermittent white noise.

Originally Posted by KevB

My wife is very cool, let's me do my thing, takes care of the kids....but after 9 years of marriage.....

I hate that we get the kids to bed, sit down to watch a movie together and she's out like a light 5 minutes in. Why not just go to bed and let me watch my mindless action adventure without the sawing wood background noise?

I hate that she gets new (nice) tennis shoes every few months because she treats them like shit. Never unlaces to put on/take off, etc. I've still got shoes from 6 years ago that look brand new, while her 1 month old shoes look like she mugged a homeless person.

I hate that she won't move into the 21st century with our finances. Still wants to write in a check register and balance manually. Um, that takes 1/2 the time and is more accurate on the computer....she'll have none of it.

Doesn't swallow....I know, I tried to set the precedent early on, but it wasn't happening. She's open to other things, so I don't push it.

Plays the "wait 'till Daddy gets home" card with the kids. Yet, disapproves when I yell at them. Well, the reason they listen to me is because there is a hint of fear. That fear comes from my ability to become visibly angry in a matter of seconds. Perfected by watching the Chiefs BTW.

Having said all of this, I couldn't ask for a better mate and mother to my children. I'm sure her list about me is longer than this entire thread....

Holy crap. Your wife is the polar opposite of mine. She has sneakers that look brand new that may predate me. She swallows. She's an electronics whiz. I'm the one falling asleep during the movie. But, I'm also sure her list about me is longer than this thread. Heh heh. I have it pretty good, I guess. My only real complaint is that she won't pick up hot women to bring home. Not a deal breaker.... for now anyway.

[Frosty]

Originally Posted by picasso

For white noise to help her sleep. That is fine - BUT NOT IN THE FRICKIN WINTER!!!! I complain about it every year and it doesn't change a thing.

I do that, too, otherwise every single noise will wake me up. The drone of the fan covers that up.

Fortunately, my wife doesn't care. She could sleep with a train going through our room. Twice we have had our smoke detectors trigger in the middle of the night. These are the kind that if one goes off, they all go off. The noise is mind-numbing.

She slept through it both times.

[PastorMikH]

Originally Posted by KevB

I hate that we get the kids to bed, sit down to watch a movie together and she's out like a light 5 minutes in. Why not just go to bed and let me watch my mindless action adventure without the sawing wood background noise?

Yeah, mine does all that, except for the snoring. I can't put "We Were Soldiers" in because we're supposed to be watching it together. However, 5 minutes into the movie she picks, she's out.

I did switch on her once though. She was out like a light, I threw in "Rules of Engagement". There's that part at the beginning where Tommy Lee Jones is in Nam. They're sneaking through the jungle and I cranked the sound. All of a sudden there's a fire fight with all kinds of explosions and bullet zings. She came up about 4 feet off that couch with the funniest look on her face.

[chiefs4me]

The crap my husband does to piss me off,,,,,,,,

How about suprising me with cooking breakfast,,only to dirty every freaking pan we own,,grease everywhere and not cleaning up the mess.

How about starting a new project every couple of days and not finishing the one he was working on.

Not ever picking up his dirty clothes from the bathroom floor when the hamper is a foot away.

I make him a list for the store with the price,aisle,shape,form,color of what I want only to have him come home without anything on my list.

Spending an hour picking out a movie to watch only to have it be the most boring movie ever.

Driving MY truck,,,but me never getting to drive his camaro.

Oh I could go on and on,,,but these are just a few.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by chiefs4me

The crap my husband does to piss me off,,,,,,,,

How about suprising me with cooking breakfast,,only to dirty every freaking pan we own,,grease everywhere and not cleaning up the mess.

How about starting a new project every couple of days and not finishing the one he was working on.

Not ever picking up his dirty clothes from the bathroom floor when the hamper is a foot away.

I make him a list for the store with the price,aisle,shape,form,color of what I want only to have him come home without anything on my list.

Spending an hour picking out a movie to watch only to have it be the most boring movie ever.

Driving MY truck,,,but me never getting to drive his camaro.

Oh I could go on and on,,,but these are just a few.

Until you got to the part about the truck and the camaro, I was thinking that maybe you were my wife.

[stevieray]

Originally Posted by chiefs4me

Oh I could go on and on,,,.

We know, trust us.