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View Poll Results: Did you seek father's permission/blessing?
Yes, it is a tradition I wanted to keep 42 27.10%
Yes, it is a tradition I knew spouse's family wanted to keep 19 12.26%
No 78 50.32%
I've never proposed 16 10.32%
Voters: 155. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 01-16-2013, 10:43 AM  
La literatura La literatura is offline
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Married members: Did you seek permission/blessing?

Just wondering what the practice/custom is.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:10 PM   #121
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
People have to remember when this tradition started, the daughters were getting married at the age of 14
And taking a daughter was the equivalent of asking to borrow the man's hammer or fence post digger thingie.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:13 PM   #122
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post
And taking a daughter was the equivalent of asking to borrow the man's hammer or fence post digger thingie.
Yeah, he wasn't through with either
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:13 PM   #123
DonkyPuncher DonkyPuncher is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
People have to remember when this tradition started, the daughters were getting married at the age of 14
Well in that case if it were my 14 year old daughter my answer would be F**K NO
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:20 PM   #124
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DonkyPuncher View Post
Well in that case if it were my 14 year old daughter my answer would be F**K NO
Then you would have a Romeo/Juliet scenario on your hands, and you wouldn't want that...
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:23 PM   #125
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Nope, didnt bother because we both knew they couldnt stand me and my awful, immoral long hair and rowdy reputation.

They pretty much came around after i joined the army though, so it was mostly "all good" after that.

We made it 13 years, not bad for a couple of 19 year olds.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:29 PM   #126
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Quote:
Originally Posted by seclark View Post
yeah, but it was a little awkward, since she was already knocked up.
her dad was a big old boy
sec

THIS


Hey I broke this jar...I'll go ahead and pay for it.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:30 PM   #127
Canofbier Canofbier is offline
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Originally Posted by Rausch View Post
...

True.

Would you decide to care less then?
I'd probably wish that I could, but no. It's a complicated situation, but ultimately I'd just try to be happy that she's happy.

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So on both fronts, deep down, you can admit it's important to look that man in the eye and be good?...
Definitely.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:55 PM   #128
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Originally Posted by lazepoo View Post
It only occurred to me after speaking with friends. An overwhelming majority of my friends asked for permission before proposing. I am 30 years old for generational reference.

The idea rubbed me the wrong way, though, because we were both independent adults which is why I made it clear that I sought their support rather than permission.

In talking with her parents that day, I found out that her Dad had not asked, which I found humorous.
No one actually asks for permission, and anyone who says they have, is wrong whether they realize it or not. What they are actually doing is asking for the father's blessing.

If he says no, they would not have shrugged their shoulders, said "well shoot, so much for that", and broken up with the girl.
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:07 PM   #129
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Hell, I never asked the wife to marry me; it was just understood that we would.

She was raised by her grandmother, so I had ask her permission. When we announced our plans, her question to me was "How do you expect to provide for my grandaughter in the style for which she has grown accustom?" I answered "Go on welfare."

Game on! We have been married now for 46 years.
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:26 PM   #130
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My mother in law wasn't even invited to the wedding.
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:39 PM   #131
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20 years later I am wishing I had just accepted the "No" rather than convincing him to let me marry his daughter.
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:43 PM   #132
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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Originally Posted by I Am The Walrus View Post
20 years later I am wishing I had just accepted the "No" rather than convincing him to let me marry his daughter.
Karma's a bitch, man
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:48 PM   #133
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He told me no.
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:50 PM   #134
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Strongside View Post
My gf and I were high school sweethearts. We were together for 10.5 years before we decided to get engaged. By that point, it was a nonchalant formality.

"Hey, I'm gonna ask Heather to marry me. Is that cool?"

"Are you serious? I thought you guys were married already."
That is right out of the story books, hopefully you are still happily together.

ours was just opposite

After knowing each other for three weeks, we just ran off and got married and didn't invite anyone from either side of the family. We didn't even take friends along. We told them when we got back.

The funnest part of the whole thing, is she stayed in the car while I went in the Marine barracks and won enough money playing pool to do the deal, with a couple bottles of "Cold Duck" and a room at the Holiday Inn to go along with it.
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:52 PM   #135
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Originally Posted by Bo's Pelini View Post
He told me no.
Are you referring to the father here?
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