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Old 02-10-2013, 10:39 PM  
"Bob" Dobbs "Bob" Dobbs is offline
Kickin' it in Dobbstown.
 
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So, I need the Planets' wisdom (such as it is)

So I went out with a new girl over the weekend. Friday AND Saturday nights. No I have not hit it yet, but, yeah it's gonna happen soon. I asked her out again for Wednesday night. NOW I realize that's the night before Valentine's ****ing Day. Crap. What is the gift protocol?
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Old 02-11-2013, 08:49 AM   #76
Saul Good Saul Good is offline
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Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins View Post
Buy two 50lb sacks of lime, some rope, and a trash bag. Take her out somewhere secluded, make sure that the radio in the car is off. Once you pull over to the destination, ask her to get out as you have a surprise for her. Take her back to the trunk, open it up, give her a second to realize what is in there, then nudge her like you're going to shove her in. Once she stiffens up, break out a smile and say "Gotcha!!" Then go watch a Kevin James movie.
What the ****? Do not do this if you ever want to see her again.

Seriously...Kevin James? That's ****ed up.
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Colon is 0.7 WAR or 5M in value. He makes 500k. Getting pretty close, and since he's producing war each of the next 4 years of club control, he's fair value for Upton straight up. More than fair actually.
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Old 02-11-2013, 08:53 AM   #77
"Bob" Dobbs "Bob" Dobbs is offline
Kickin' it in Dobbstown.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch View Post
You'll break up with her in 2 months anyway.

I still don't get why you're sweating this...
Not sweating it, just trying to ensure tapping it.
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"Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing."Bob" Dobbs would the whole thing.
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Old 02-11-2013, 09:04 AM   #78
LoneWolf LoneWolf is offline
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Pearl necklace.
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Originally Posted by Chiefs Pantalones View Post
If we win 8 games I'll post a nude selfie.
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Old 02-11-2013, 09:49 AM   #79
tooge tooge is offline
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give her a job. Planin tulips
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Old 02-11-2013, 09:52 AM   #80
Rausch Rausch is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by "Bob" Dobbs View Post
Not sweating it, just trying to ensure tapping it.
Install the camera in the light above the bed.

End of story...
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"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).
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Originally Posted by rico View Post
I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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Old 02-11-2013, 10:08 AM   #81
Old Dog Old Dog is offline
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Second page and no one has suggested a tube of Astroglide.....I am disappoint
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Old 02-11-2013, 10:21 AM   #82
lcarus lcarus is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by "Bob" Dobbs View Post
I guess I'm just pissed at myself for starting this shit BEFORE VD. Dammit.
Stage chest pains Valentines day morning. You'll be in the hospital and she'll have to bring you something.
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Old 02-11-2013, 10:21 AM   #83
Rausch Rausch is offline
Gonzo = Sexy Bitch
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Old Dog View Post
Second page and no one has suggested a tube of Astroglide.....I am disappoint
No pics...
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Quote:
"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).
Quote:
Originally Posted by rico View Post
I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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Old 02-11-2013, 01:52 PM   #84
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Originally Posted by Dayze View Post
Just get a nice simple bouqet of flowers and give them to her saying something like you'd like to commemorate this huge occasion etc. sort of playfully not making a huge deal of it, but at the same time saying you thought she should have something nice etc.

I would not get roses at this point, Colorful bouquet of carnations and daisys is a good route. The colored/dyed kind
Flowers. Carnations are pretty universally reviled. Gerber daisies are nice, also can't go wrong with a mix of lillies and purple flowers. Stay away from roses of any color this early.

I just met an awesome girl at a SB party. Plan is flowers (DELIVERED TO HER WORK), homemade shrimp scampi, and wine
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Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 02-11-2013, 01:54 PM   #85
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins View Post
Buy two 50lb sacks of lime, some rope, and a trash bag. Take her out somewhere secluded, make sure that the radio in the car is off. Once you pull over to the destination, ask her to get out as you have a surprise for her. Take her back to the trunk, open it up, give her a second to realize what is in there, then nudge her like you're going to shove her in. Once she stiffens up, break out a smile and say "Gotcha!!" Then go watch a Kevin James movie.
The Kevin James movie is the worst part of this scenario....
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Old 02-11-2013, 02:00 PM   #86
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Originally Posted by Old Dog View Post
Second page and no one has suggested a tube of Astroglide.....I am disappoint
Astroglide is for amateurs (or poor people). Gotta go with a classy lube.

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Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 02-11-2013, 02:09 PM   #87
BigChiefTablet BigChiefTablet is offline
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BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.BigChiefTablet Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
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Old 02-11-2013, 02:10 PM   #88
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Giver her a Hot Carl, or a Donkey Punch, or a California Mudslide, or a Cleveland Steamer, or a Dirty Sanchez, or a Pearl Necklace, or a Cincinnati Bowtie, or a Boston Pancake, or The Shocker.

You have a plethora of choices....

I think I need to SING about it!


Last edited by gblowfish; 02-11-2013 at 02:24 PM..
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Old 02-11-2013, 02:24 PM   #89
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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Take her to see the new Die Hard movie.
And put a hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket for your dick
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