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Old 06-18-2013, 03:54 PM  
shitgoose shitgoose is offline
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Power Dumps

You know what I'm talking about. As you're making your way to the throne you've got back in black playing in your head. You sit down and waste no time unleashing a monster brown trout that makes a sound similar to a bowling bowl being dropped down a well. Sometimes its shaped like a question mark or looks exactly like
a Chipotle burrito if they wrapped them in brown tortillas.

You finish up with a smile on your face and a little pep in your step.

God those are great
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Old 06-18-2013, 10:33 PM   #16
notorious notorious is offline
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Clean Break Power Dumps are the stuff that dreams are made of.
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Old 06-18-2013, 10:39 PM   #17
'Hamas' Jenkins 'Hamas' Jenkins is offline
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I'm a fan of the ones where you sit down, fart, and the fart makes a leaking air sound around the shit before it blows it out into the toilet with explosive force. You can empty your bowels and fill a toilet in two seconds with that kind of crap.
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Old 06-18-2013, 10:39 PM   #18
Simply Red Simply Red is offline
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VARSITY
stop eating processed food you ****
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Ryan:

* The Chiefs have more player-committed murder-suicides than playoff victories in the past two decades.

* During last year's meltdown against the Colts in the post season, it looked like the injuries slider was turned up to 100% and they were carting bodies off the field like they were filming B-roll for "The Strain".

* Brodie Croyle (!) is the only quarterback drafted by the team to start a game for them since the mid-80's...and he barely beat out Damon Huard in the process. Croyle then promptly lost all six of his starts. He couldn't even beat out Tyler Thigpen once he returned from injury.
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Old 06-19-2013, 03:40 AM   #19
listopencil listopencil is offline
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stop eating processed food you ****
Yeah, that made quite a difference for me. I came to the realization that I was being lazy with dinner for the kids so I made a point of purchasing mostly raw product. We still get carry out once in a while and I still cheat with a few items. I like to use canned spinach for instance. But we are all eating healthier and my food tastes better than the shit in a box on that grocery store shelf.
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Old 06-19-2013, 10:18 AM   #20
Kerberos Kerberos is offline
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Just got done with a power dump. Had to take a magazine in with me just in case. Nothing like feeling of getting paid at work to let the tortoise out of the shell.

Had some of my wife's amazing stir fry last night that was a 9 on the hot scale of 1-10.

With that pushing on the Chef Salad I had for lunch yesterday I can tell you that the skid marks were a plenty on the toilet as the mass tried to break up to go down the toilet.

I feel at least 4-5 lbs lighter. The pep in my step is noticeable.
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Old 06-19-2013, 10:45 AM   #21
shitgoose shitgoose is offline
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Hearing about other peoples power dumps makes me wish I was power dumping right now.

I wish they could bottle and sell the feeling you have post-power dump.
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Old 06-19-2013, 10:55 AM   #22
Mr. Flopnuts Mr. Flopnuts is offline
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This is a solid poop thread, which is unfortunate because I've been shitting through a screen door for the last 3 months.
Almost like a prophecy, I absolutely destroyed the plumbing this morning with a poo that must've weighed the same as an average 4 year old child. Thank you for your blessings, Lord Shitgoose.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins View Post
I'm a fan of the ones where you sit down, fart, and the fart makes a leaking air sound around the shit before it blows it out into the toilet with explosive force. You can empty your bowels and fill a toilet in two seconds with that kind of crap.

Ahh, yes. The Assplosion. Such a satisfying collection of sound, force, and feeling. When in public, I don't hide those. I revel in them. Your discomfort is my full comfort. That's your problem, not mine. I walk with a swagger from my public stall back into the store with confidence, and invigoration.
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Old 06-19-2013, 11:40 AM   #23
Dartgod Dartgod is offline
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I had one of those yesterday that was a bit too "large". Still feeling the pain today.
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Old 06-19-2013, 11:54 AM   #24
Superturtle Superturtle is offline
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Logs so massive they rip your asshole are no fun indeed...
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Old 06-19-2013, 02:33 PM   #25
Kerberos Kerberos is offline
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Originally Posted by Superturtle View Post
Logs so massive they rip your asshole are no fun indeed...
After my carpal tunnel surgery I was taking some codeine pain killers and did not think about the side effects of that while eating solid food and drinking low amounts of water.

After 3 days without taking a shit I knew something was wrong.......

MAN... I had constipation like I'VE NEVER had it in my life. I was taking Metamucil and some OTC constipation liquid by the cup full

When I finally got the first round to exit ..... I felt like what can only be associated with being VIOLATED with what felt full beer can.

MY ass was so sore I had to go lay down in bed for 4 hours in a fetal position.

NEVER again will I take codeine based pain killers without drinking a plethora of water and downing copious amounts of Metamucil and maybe even a bottle of Phillips to wash it all down.
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Old 06-19-2013, 02:41 PM   #26
saphojunkie saphojunkie is offline
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Posting from the toilet. Power dump in session.
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saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.saphojunkie has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 06-19-2013, 02:50 PM   #27
Fish Fish is offline
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Thought this was a Paula Dean recipe thread....
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Old 06-19-2013, 02:58 PM   #28
J Diddy J Diddy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kerberos View Post
After my carpal tunnel surgery I was taking some codeine pain killers and did not think about the side effects of that while eating solid food and drinking low amounts of water.

After 3 days without taking a shit I knew something was wrong.......

MAN... I had constipation like I'VE NEVER had it in my life. I was taking Metamucil and some OTC constipation liquid by the cup full

When I finally got the first round to exit ..... I felt like what can only be associated with being VIOLATED with what felt full beer can.

MY ass was so sore I had to go lay down in bed for 4 hours in a fetal position.

NEVER again will I take codeine based pain killers without drinking a plethora of water and downing copious amounts of Metamucil and maybe even a bottle of Phillips to wash it all down.
Day 4 in the hospital without a dump, I plead to the nurse. She brings me back a tube of lube, a glove and a suppository. The look on this cute little things face said it all, "it was a please don't make me shove this up your ass" face and I didn't have the heart,(mostly because I hadn't bathed in about 5 days.) So I didn't, however every now and then I masturbate about it.

Anyway, in terms of the dump I think they had to bring in 4 toilets and repaint the walls.
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