prayer request: for my children

[big nasty kcnut]

Keep the faith what comes around goes around. Remember that to defeat the enemy you must find out what she does and sometime just call the cops to a suprise search warrent.

We got custody of my teenage girls 2 months ago and have to attend their mother's appearl next week. You can do it.

[Hydrae]

Originally Posted by Phobia

We got custody of my teenage girls 2 months ago and have to attend their mother's appearl next week. You can do it.

Congrats Phil, I know how much that means to you!

[go bo]

Originally Posted by Phobia

We got custody of my teenage girls 2 months ago and have to attend their mother's appearl next week. You can do it.

wow, that's great news...

it's hard for a father to get full custody in missouri, real hard...

whether it's a missouri or texas decree, congratulations...

you must have had one a hell of a good lawyer...

congrats again...

[Loki]

Originally Posted by Phobia

We got custody of my teenage girls 2 months ago and have to attend their mother's appearl next week. You can do it.

congrats on your victory.

[Bugeater]

Our legal system is entirely ****ed up when it comes to this stuff, I'll never understand why the men are always at such a disadvantage. The fact that DSS is entertaining accusations from someone with her background is disturbing as well.

I just hope all turns out well for you & your kids.

[Loki]

Originally Posted by Bugeater

Our legal system is entirely ****ed up when it comes to this stuff, I'll never understand why the men are always at such a disadvantage. The fact that DSS is entertaining accusations from someone with her background is disturbing as well.

I just hope all turns out well for you & your kids.

dude, that makes two of us!!! WTF is up with the bias against men?

as far as DSS is concerned i fully agree. 45 fuckin days of those assfucks crawling up my ass and dragging my kids down "memory lane"... AGAIN...
everyone keeps saying we need to move the kids beyond all this, yet they're going to drag them through it all over again. hypocritical jackasses... . they're going to find me "negligent" in my children's development when asshole the crackhead is the one calling them 40 times a week making the claims and halting all and any means of forward progress??!!

good work DSS. real perceptive...

[luv]

If you and your ex's roles were reversed, she'd have already been granted full custody. I don't know why it is that the law thinks that mothers deserve more slack than fathers, or that they can somehow care for their children any better than the fathers just because they gave birth to them. Fathers are just as much a part of their children as the mothers are.

You're in my thoughts. Best of luck to you.

[go bo]

loki...

congratulations for getting custody of your kids...

i wouldn't worry too much about the court giving custody back to your ex... i mean asshole...

once you've gotten custody based on the mother's behavior, the likelihood that she would regain custody s roughly equal to the likelihood that that i could fly away like a hummingbird any time soon...

don't hold your breath...

you've already won the war (custody), a few more skirmishes and it will all be over with, is my guess...

[Loki]

Originally Posted by go bo

loki...

congratulations for getting custody of your kids...

i wouldn't worry too much about the court giving custody back to your ex... i mean asshole...

once you've gotten custody based on the mother's behavior, the likelihood that she would regain custody s roughly equal to the likelihood that that i could fly away like a hummingbird any time soon...

don't hold your breath...

you've already won the war (custody), a few more skirmishes and it will all be over with, is my guess...

i was hoping to hear your perspective on this. (you're an attorney aren't you?)

i understand that once custody is granted that it's going to take some SERIOUS pull to overturn the decision. (as far as i know, the intricacies of this case may or may not have set some new precedence in my state... @ least that's what the judge and the GAL were discussing at the last hearing)

my questioning deals more with what GOOD is this decision going to do for me or my kids when she has:
a. visitation
b. is already violating the court order (and in contempt of court) with said visitation based on the fact that she is NOT to have my kids anywhere near ex-convict and gangsta-boy. (according to the order set @ the hearing before custody was assigned to me)

she is the type of asshole that will "agree" with everything in front of the judge, but will do whatever the fuck she wants to do when she leaves the courtroom. she violated the separation/divorce agreement(s) the moment she stepped foot out of the courthouse and never got in trouble, and she is already violating these custody proceedings and we're not even done with all the hearing for fuck's sake!!!

so what good is "full custody" when she has ANY visitation whatsoever considering her blatant disregard of the judge's orders??!!

*groan*

anyways, thanks for your thoughts bo.

[Valiant]

Originally Posted by Loki

i was hoping to hear your perspective on this. (you're an attorney aren't you?)

i understand that once custody is granted that it's going to take some SERIOUS pull to overturn the decision. (as far as i know, the intricacies of this case may or may not have set some new precedence in my state... @ least that's what the judge and the GAL were discussing at the last hearing)

my questioning deals more with what GOOD is this decision going to do for me or my kids when she has:
a. visitation
b. is already violating the court order (and in contempt of court) with said visitation based on the fact that she is NOT to have my kids anywhere near ex-convict and gangsta-boy. (according to the order set @ the hearing before custody was assigned to me)

she is the type of asshole that will "agree" with everything in front of the judge, but will do whatever the fuck she wants to do when she leaves the courtroom. she violated the separation/divorce agreement(s) the moment she stepped foot out of the courthouse and never got in trouble, and she is already violating these custody proceedings and we're not even done with all the hearing for fuck's sake!!!

so what good is "full custody" when she has ANY visitation whatsoever considering her blatant disregard of the judge's orders??!!

*groan*

anyways, thanks for your thoughts bo.

You get your cop friend or hire a PI to follow her and take pictures of her when she is violating these agreements..

Personally I would be more worried about her just nabbing the kids coming from what you have wrote...

[Loki]

Originally Posted by Valiant

You get your cop friend or hire a PI to follow her and take pictures of her when she is violating these agreements..

Personally I would be more worried about her just nabbing the kids coming from what you have wrote...

strange that you mention the "nabbing" issue. just within the last week, i believe she planned to do that when she came to pick up my son for his "dinner/brainwashing" visit.

the whole scene reminded me of some pervert who would stake out some kiddie playground and try to lure kids into his van with the promise of a box of candy or some sh*t like that.

i mentioned in my initial post that asshole has been unable to see my daughter while the physical abuse/hospitalization was being investigated. well she came over this last wednesday with the intent of luring my daughter into her vehicle with my daughter's pet dog (also mentioned above). now asshole was SUPPOSED to give the dog up a few months ago, but has kept it because she knows it's the ONLY thing my daughter likes about being at her house. my daughter has missed the dog horribly and asshole knows this. she still won't give the dog up because she knows it makes my daughter sad... what an asshole!!
anyways, if i hadn't been home from work sick this last wednesday, she might have gotten my daughter into the car because my daughter really wanted to see her dog. asshole tried to lie to the babysitter last week and told her that my daughter was supposed to go with her from now on... luckily my sitter knows what asshole is all about and called me on the phone and asked me first before letting my daughter go ANYWHERE with asshole. (smart kid!) i can't describe the expression on asshole's face when i came to the door instead of the babysitter. she was NOT expecting me to be there for certain.
anyways, she shows up at the door, her jaw hits the ground because i'm there, but she still decides to go thru with her plan of luring my daughter into her car. everytime my daughter stooped over to pet the dog, asshole would reel the leash in and my daughter would have to step forward. what began in the doorway soon ended up out on the front lawn. once my daughter was down on the front lawn, asshole and asshole's mother both blocked her path back to the door and started grilling her with questions as to why she didn't want to go visit them and why she wouldn't talk to them on the phone and such. they then told my daughter that she had to hug them (now remember... asshole threw my daughter into a wall 2-3 weeks ago putting her in the hospital... asshole's mother saw this happen and LAUGHED at it... again, i have no hard proof of this, but BOTH my kids said they saw this happen, and i am used to my son lying for his mother.) watching this all happen made me boiling angry and i was about to say something to these two harpies when my daughter made a break for it and ran back into the house begging me to get her dog for her.
asshole's reply to this was, "if you want to see your dog, you need to come with us..." my daughter burst into tears, my neighbors started coming to their doorways so asshole and her asshole mother beat a hasty retreat.

good thing i was home.

[go bo]

Originally Posted by Loki

i was hoping to hear your perspective on this. (you're an attorney aren't you?)

i understand that once custody is granted that it's going to take some SERIOUS pull to overturn the decision. (as far as i know, the intricacies of this case may or may not have set some new precedence in my state... @ least that's what the judge and the GAL were discussing at the last hearing)

my questioning deals more with what GOOD is this decision going to do for me or my kids when she has:
a. visitation
b. is already violating the court order (and in contempt of court) with said visitation based on the fact that she is NOT to have my kids anywhere near ex-convict and gangsta-boy. (according to the order set @ the hearing before custody was assigned to me)

she is the type of asshole that will "agree" with everything in front of the judge, but will do whatever the fuck she wants to do when she leaves the courtroom. she violated the separation/divorce agreement(s) the moment she stepped foot out of the courthouse and never got in trouble, and she is already violating these custody proceedings and we're not even done with all the hearing for fuck's sake!!!

so what good is "full custody" when she has ANY visitation whatsoever considering her blatant disregard of the judge's orders??!!

*groan*

anyways, thanks for your thoughts bo.

i'm retired and have successfully completed rehab and been readmitted to the human race...

turning to your question, there are many substantial advantages to having custody such as control over the kids medical treatment, control over the activities going on around them, etc.

but most of all, they get to live with you and are safe from asshole and her excon boyfriend most of the time...

when your kids get older, they will remember what happened to them when they were forced to live with asshole and friend, and they will love you all the more for rescuing them from a very negative environment...

you should also be aware that judge's rarely order the mother to stay away from the kids, no matter how bad she is, unless of course she gets convicted of some drug related or child abuse crime, it is very unlikely that a judge will cut off all visitation for asshole...

otoh, there will come a point when the judge gets tired of it all and will start enforcing his his orders with comtempt charges and it's possible that the judge could even refuse to schedule any more hearings in the absence of any real evidence to support her position...

regarding asshole having visitation, it's almost impossible to cut off all visitation, but if things don't calm down and the children can testify as to what's been going on whern they visit asshole there's a remote possibility...

when you go to court next time, ask for supervised visitation for asshole (that will put a crimp in her efforts to turn the kids against you and would go a long way towards protecting them from abuse - and they would never have to see assholes butt buddy again)...

btw, i assume you have a lawyer handling this, so none of this is "legal advice, etc. etc.

just friendly suggestions, if you know what i mean...

personally, i'd try for supervised visitation at the next hearing, but obviously i don't have all the facts nor do i know about divorce and custody laws in your state, so i can't really advise you about a pending case...

but from personal experience, i can tell you that it is very very difficult for a father to get full custody, but once granted, it would take a miracle for asshole to get them back...

regarding the judge's order not being followed and/or enforced...

annoying as it is, asshole will be able to file various crap seeking to regain custody for awhile, but at some point the judge will get tired of all the frivolous motions, which won't help her any when it comes to the judge making his decision on what really matters, getting supervised visitations...

hopefully, your lawyer will continue to serve you well (he's a friggin miracle worker already) and at some point he should be able to cut off all but supervised visitatoin...

but that's probably about the best you could hope for...

almost no judge would refuse a mother having supervised visitation with her kids (except under exteme conditions, which you don't have here, afaics)...

you should discuss all this with your lawyer, he's you point man now...

caveat: everything i've said is subject to what facts you're are able to prove in court regarding the need for supervised visitation and subject to, of course, the law in your state...

but pm me if you have any questions that i may be able to help you with...

and good luck to ya, bro...

[Loki]

Originally Posted by go bo

...
turning to your question, there are many substantial advantages to having custody such as control over the kids medical treatment, control over the activities going on around them, etc.
...
...

first of all, her visitations ARE supposed to be supervised. for some fucked up reason they seem to think that having the visits at her parent's house qualifies as being "supervised". they ALL know that the kids are NOT supposed to be anywhere near ex-con and gangsta-boy because mother-of-asshole has been at most of the hearings, and was certainly at the last hearing when they looked straight at her in the courtroom and said that supervised visitations would take place in their house.
they also looked straight at her when they reiterated that the kids would not be anywhere near ex-con and gangsta-boy during these supervised visits.
this is also written in plain english on the damn court orders we all have copies of.

regardless of such, ex-con and gangsta-boy have BOTH been at the "supervised" visitation house when my son goes for his "supervised" visits. asshole even had the audacity to pick my son up with ex-con and gangsta-boy in the fucking car with her!!! she sent my son back in to tell my mom (who was watching the kids for me while i was working) that it was an old neighbor in the passenger's seat (gangsta-boy was hiding in the back seat). my mom has met that particular person and KNEW it wasn't him. by the time she got the camera, asshole had sped off down the street with my son in the car with the fucking people she isn't supposed to have him around...
cripes... i picked him up from his visit tonight and my daughter saw them peeking out the windows... again. my son also confirmed that they had been there all weekend... again.

WTF??!!

yeah... "supervised" visitation. they're ALL thumbing their noses at the court while i follow the rules like a friggin' chump. this SUCKS bo... for real.