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Old 01-27-2008, 05:35 PM
Smell My Dump
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Old 01-27-2008, 05:49 PM   #2
Hydrae Hydrae is online now
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I just eat a prune every day. These make it really easy and convenient:

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Old 01-27-2008, 06:53 PM   #3
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I used to have constipation problems (still do, actually). I went in for a colonoscopy this past fall and the results I got were kind of underwhelming. I was psyched up for some sort of fatal cancer-like colon disorder and all I got was, "Eat less starches. More grain and fruits." I asked about colon cleansing and my doctor pretty much told me that the stuff they show on TV is natural. It's not necessary to cleanse the colon at all.

I've changed my diet a bit and my bowel movements are bigger and a lot more frequent. As long as that happens, I don't think it's really necessary to worry about the stuff your body secretes.
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:21 PM   #4
the Talking Can the Talking Can is offline
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I used to have constipation problems (still do, actually). I went in for a colonoscopy this past fall and the results I got were kind of underwhelming. I was psyched up for some sort of fatal cancer-like colon disorder and all I got was, "Eat less starches. More grain and fruits." I asked about colon cleansing and my doctor pretty much told me that the stuff they show on TV is natural. It's not necessary to cleanse the colon at all.

I've changed my diet a bit and my bowel movements are bigger and a lot more frequent. As long as that happens, I don't think it's really necessary to worry about the stuff your body secretes.
colon cleansing is a scam

drink plenty of water, get sufficient fiber, crap like an allstar....
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:26 PM   #5
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colon cleansing is a scam

drink plenty of water, get sufficient fiber, crap like an allstar....
RoR craps like an all star. But it comes out of his mouth instead.
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:57 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by the Talking Can View Post
colon cleansing is a scam

drink plenty of water, get sufficient fiber, crap like an allstar....
This.

You're ingesting something that intentionally congeals in your colon. Don't be surprised when you crap out a nasty lump of jellified junk, because that's what you're putting into your body. The nasty gooey blob only comes out of people who take the colon cleanser, because the gooey blob is created by the colon cleanser. Seriously, before you spend money on this junk, go ask a gastroenterologist. Or read up a little bit...

http://hubpages.com/hub/Colon_Cleanse_Scams

http://quackfiles.blogspot.com/2004/...ious-idea.html
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Old 01-27-2008, 07:31 PM   #7
stonedstooge stonedstooge is offline
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colon cleanser

Having taken narcotics over a length period of time constipation is a major problem that does not go away. Is that why you are considering a colon cleanser? If its due to constipation use a stool softener. I've used them, they sell them at Wally World and is the only thing I have found to help from getting consipated. Before I started using them, I went for 5 or 6 days without a bowel movement and it would all clog up about 4 inches up my colon. I would feel like I was carrying a little friggin baby down in my ass. One time it got so bad and needed to get it out that I had to shove a spoon up my ass to pick off pieces and get it down to a size that would finish exiting the colon. I mean when it finally came out it was like 4 inches in diameter and close to a foot long. That's what killed Elvis you know he was plugged up tighter than a drain pipe with cement in it. Not a good thing to experience.
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Old 01-27-2008, 07:48 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stonedstooge
Having taken narcotics over a length period of time constipation is a major problem that does not go away. Is that why you are considering a colon cleanser? If its due to constipation use a stool softener. I've used them, they sell them at Wally World and is the only thing I have found to help from getting consipated. Before I started using them, I went for 5 or 6 days without a bowel movement and it would all clog up about 4 inches up my colon. I would feel like I was carrying a little friggin baby down in my ass. One time it got so bad and needed to get it out that I had to shove a spoon up my ass to pick off pieces and get it down to a size that would finish exiting the colon. I mean when it finally came out it was like 4 inches in diameter and close to a foot long. That's what killed Elvis you know he was plugged up tighter than a drain pipe with cement in it. Not a good thing to experience.
GOATSE will be along shortly to make fun of you for not being able to handle something 4 inchs in diameter and a foot long in your ass.
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Old 01-27-2008, 11:31 PM   #9
acesn8s acesn8s is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stonedstooge
Having taken narcotics over a length period of time constipation is a major problem that does not go away. Is that why you are considering a colon cleanser? If its due to constipation use a stool softener. I've used them, they sell them at Wally World and is the only thing I have found to help from getting consipated. Before I started using them, I went for 5 or 6 days without a bowel movement and it would all clog up about 4 inches up my colon. I would feel like I was carrying a little friggin baby down in my ass. One time it got so bad and needed to get it out that I had to shove a spoon up my ass to pick off pieces and get it down to a size that would finish exiting the colon. I mean when it finally came out it was like 4 inches in diameter and close to a foot long. That's what killed Elvis you know he was plugged up tighter than a drain pipe with cement in it. Not a good thing to experience.
I'm kinda wishing that I never read that now.
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:10 PM   #10
The Bad Guy The Bad Guy is offline
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One time it got so bad and needed to get it out that I had to shove a spoon up my ass to pick off pieces and get it down to a size that would finish exiting the colon. I mean when it finally came out it was like 4 inches in diameter and close to a foot long. That's what killed Elvis you know he was plugged up tighter than a drain pipe with cement in it. Not a good thing to experience.
Mother of ****ing christ.
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Old 01-27-2008, 11:18 PM   #11
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Constipated

Ineeded it to come out, not get pushed in further. If he could reach it.
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Old 07-25-2009, 07:26 PM   #12
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Alrighty then. I am on week 3-4 of Colon cleanse. The brand the guy with the black mustache has the infomercial on. That goes on and on about having healthy bowel movements.

Talk about nice healthy bowel movements! I'm impressed. Plus it doesn't make you have the feeling you have to run to the bathroom or anything.

So i recommend the product. That is all.
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:18 PM   #13
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Alrighty then. I am on week 3-4 of Colon cleanse. The brand the guy with the black mustache has the infomercial on. That goes on and on about having healthy bowel movements.

Talk about nice healthy bowel movements! I'm impressed. Plus it doesn't make you have the feeling you have to run to the bathroom or anything.

So i recommend the product. That is all.
You could have gotten the same results by eating a lot of veggies and cutting out sugar.
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:26 PM   #14
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You could have gotten the same results by eating a lot of veggies and cutting out sugar.

I have been eating a lot of veggies the last month or so. Way more then i normally do. So maybe its a combo of both.

Pus i take a medicine that constipates you. I hate constipation!! So that i why i have been a veggie whore lately.

Regardless it doesn't hurt anything doing both.
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Old 07-25-2009, 08:20 PM   #15
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Clogged is a mother-fer .. Ive used softeners and over-niters both help ...
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