Frozen Pizza and Life

[Rain Man]

I went to the grocery store tonight to hunt dinner, and decided that a frozen pizza was the way to go. The village cheered when I brought it home, and we used every part of it as part of our pact with The Great Creator in the Sky.

But anyway, back to the point.

Our grocery store arranges the frozen pizzas by price. On the far left, you've got the Totinos and other stuff that's food in name only. Then you move to the right with Tony's and then Red Baron and Home Run (blech) in the middle. As you move further right you get to the highest-priced stuff like DiGiorno and the overpriced California pizza kitchen.

As I stared at the pizza freezers making my decision, I had an epiphany about life. I thought back to my high school days when I was more or less a third worlder, and in those days there was no option but Totino's. I ate it and I liked it because it was a treat. I didn't get it very often.

Then I got into college and actually did okay on money, and I graduated to Tony's where possible, going the Totino's route only when money got tight. After graduation, when I got a real job, it was Tony's all the way for years.

Then I got married. Dual income, no kids, and frankly it wasn't an issue to pay more for a frozen pizza. I stood at the freezers tonight and grabbed a DiGiorno for $8.49, an act that would have been unthinkable for the first half of my life.

I'm in my prime earning years right now, making reasonable money with few financial worries. If I want to eat out of the right side of the pizza case, I can do it. No problem.

But a time will come when I can't eat out of the right side. I'll retire and I'll have to watch my money and my savings will dwindle, and at some point I'll start eating Tony's again. But this time I'll eat Tony's with the memory of once having DiGiorno. That might make my pizza night melancholy.

And the end of the story is inevitable. I'll be an old man sitting in my house watching TV, and I'll heat up my Totino's pizza and I'll consider it a treat because I don't get to have it very often. Eventually the police will do a welfare check because I'm not paying my property taxes, and they'll find my mummified body in a chair, holding a piece of mummified Totino's.

I wish they would rearrange that pizza freezer.

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by Bearcat

I've never had provel, but I've been told numerous times that I'm not missing out .

It's not my favorite pizza, but it's not nearly as bad as some make it out to be. I've never not enjoyed an Imo's pizza. The bigger hurdle is that they're more expensive than several chains the happen to like better. And they rarely issue coupons

I can't say for sure that the thin crust and Provel are acquired taste, but is distinctive and I get cravings for it regularly. The Provel really mates up good with their sauce, and its gooeyness has a side effect of keeping the red pepper flakes from flying off the pizza if a breeze comes up.

As for frozen I never understood the premium placed on self rising crusts. Costs more and really ****s up the crust to topping ratio.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Mr. Laz

so how did you originally taste afterbirth to get the reference experience?

Totino's, I bet.

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

It's not my favorite pizza, but it's not nearly as bad as some make it out to be. I've never not enjoyed an Imo's pizza. The bigger hurdle is that they're more expensive than several chains the happen to like better. And they rarely issue coupons

I can't say for sure that the thin crust and Provel are acquired taste, but is distinctive and I get cravings for it regularly. The Provel really mates up good with their sauce, and its gooeyness has a side effect of keeping the red pepper flakes from flying off the pizza if a breeze comes up.

As for frozen I never understood the premium placed on self rising crusts. Costs more and really ****s up the crust to topping ratio.

I have had individual bites of several St. Louis/Provel pizzas. And I have left the remaining slice(s) in the garbage.

[Donger]

Originally Posted by Mr. Laz

so how did you originally taste afterbirth to get the reference experience?

I don't know about taste, but I unfortunately know what afterbirth smells like.

[gblowfish]

Yeah, we've talked about Imo Pizza here before. It's one of those St. Louis things that we don't really get here in KC. They love White Castle, Steak n Shake, provel cheese on pizza, and think Maull's on a pork steak is BBQ. Whatever St. Louis.

I will admit, that Ted Drewe's is the shiznit for custard. And the Italian food on the hill kicks major ass. Otherwise, we've got you beat on food six ways to Sunday.

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by gblowfish

Yeah, we've talked about Imo Pizza here before. It's one of those St. Louis things that we don't really get here in KC. They love White Castle, Steak n Shake, provel cheese on pizza, and think Maull's on a pork steak is BBQ. Whatever St. Louis.

I will admit, that Ted Drewe's is the shiznit for custard. And the Italian food on the hill kicks major ass. Otherwise, we've got you beat on food six ways to Sunday.

I wish there was a little green card next to the yellow and red. Yellow=Warning, Red=Infraction, Green=Megarep.

[srvy]

Nobody ever ate Leo's Pizza in KCNorth. I believe it a a mix or Mozz and Provel. It was pretty darn good.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Originally Posted by Hootie 2.0

not to mention Papa Del's here in Champaign...

probably the best deep dish pizza ... ever.

so good

I was 80 miles from there last week for work. Should've came and got one. I've never had legit Chicago deep dish.

[gblowfish]

Now I'm hungry for Pizza you bastages!!!

[Easy 6]

Originally Posted by KCUnited

I don't have much to add other than to avoid the Aldi brand frozen pizzas. It has like a weird sweet sauce and is hands down the worst frozen pizza I've had.

Mama Cozzi's... yeah, not very good.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Sounds like Mama Rosa's. I hate that shit.

[lcarus]

I eat the Totino's dollar pizzas. Should give you a clue as to where I'm at financially currently lol

[Easy 6]

Originally Posted by lcarus

I eat the Totino's dollar pizzas. Should give you a clue as to where I'm at financially currently lol

Totinos are great at any price, the best one they still make is the canadian bacon, the ham is very sweet and tasty... and all for a buck?

Theres no shame in my game.

[KCUnited]

Originally Posted by srvy

Nobody ever ate Leo's Pizza in KCNorth. I believe it a a mix or Mozz and Provel. It was pretty darn good.

I know the one that used to be in Blue Springs by the movie theater was a mix of mozz and provel. I ordered from the NKC location a few times and had to have them up the mozz for me.

Originally Posted by scott free

Mama Cozzi's... yeah, not very good.

It's a shame really, as I like most everything from Aldi.

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by gblowfish

Yeah, we've talked about Imo Pizza here before. It's one of those St. Louis things that we don't really get here in KC. They love White Castle, Steak n Shake, provel cheese on pizza, and think Maull's on a pork steak is BBQ. Whatever St. Louis.

I will admit, that Ted Drewe's is the shiznit for custard. And the Italian food on the hill kicks major ass. Otherwise, we've got you beat on food six ways to Sunday.

First, St. Louis has evolved a ****ton on barbecue. Maull's is for amateurs phumphering with pork steaks on the grill, and aren't harboring any illusions that they're doing anything gourmet. Hot dogs and burgers are there right alongside the pork steaks. Sugarfire, Pappy's and Bogarts are quality. Bandana's is reliably good too, and has sauces I actually prefer to a lot of KC joints.

White Castle is what it is, late night drunk food. I know some St. Louisans get cravings for them, but I don't. That said, St. Louis White Castles are better than the shit that opened in KC area. They screwed the pooch on the rollout. Don't know if it was inventory or training or what.

Outside of an edge in barbecue, and Strouds, I don't see KC beating StL '6 ways to Sunday.'

Great Mexican on Cherokee, great Vietnamese and Thai on Grand, about 15-20 ethnic places on The Loop, lots of great diners and great pub foods, a good handful of local sourced eateries, another handful of great Indian smattered around, Central West End, Soulard and the ace in the hole Iron Barley.