Funny Stuff Drunk Teacher Resists Arrest - Squirts Cops With Breast Milk

**DaFace** · 06-29-2011, 10:15 PM

http://deadspin.com/5816435/drunk-oh...her-breastmilk

Drunk Ohio Teacher Resists Arrest, Sprays Cops With Her Breastmilk

Jack Dickey — We're not sure we know the precise meaning of the term "hot mess," but this just has to be the perfect application. Meet Stephanie Robinette, 30, a lactating charter-school teacher from Westerville, Ohio (a Columbus suburb), who got drunk, disorderly, and weird over the weekend.

Robinette was attending a wedding at the Bridgewater Banquet & Conference Center—the self-proclaimed "premiere banquet facility of Central Ohio"—with her husband, but apparently the two got in a kerfuffle and all hell—or at least several ducts—broke loose. Namely, she hit her husband, locked herself in the car, he phoned the cops, who then arrived and tried to remove her from the car, at which point she squirted the car and the cops with breast milk.

And at which point American civilization reached its nadir, until the next time.

**Bugeater** · 06-29-2011, 10:17 PM

I'd hit it.

**kysirsoze** · 06-29-2011, 10:18 PM

This might seriously be the best thread title of all time.

BillSelfsTrophycase · 06-29-2011, 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bugeater

I'd hit it.

With a shovel

**Bwana** · 06-29-2011, 10:31 PM

Mr. Kotter?

Dante84 · 06-29-2011, 10:33 PM

Repizzle

SDChiefs · 06-29-2011, 10:38 PM

Should be in the would you thread.

stevieray · 06-29-2011, 10:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bugeater

I'd hit it.

I'm picturing the scene from the elvator on the blooper reel for LIAR LIAR.

Stinger · 06-29-2011, 10:52 PM

Lucky it was not freezing out side she could have been book on having a congealed weapon.

RedNFeisty · 06-29-2011, 11:16 PM

Why would the police try getting her out the car? As long as she doesn't have the keys, what does it matter? Let her sleep it off in the car.

booger · 06-29-2011, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedNFeisty

Why would the police try getting her out the car? As long as she doesn't have the keys, what does it matter? Let her sleep it off in the car.

not sure butt if i was to guess i'd say they were concerned that she would roll up the windows and drown herself in breastmilk.

RedNFeisty · 06-29-2011, 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by booger

not sure butt if i was to guess i'd say they were concerned that she would roll up the windows and drown herself in breastmilk.

I'm sure she would be able to drink her way out.

booger · 06-29-2011, 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedNFeisty

I'm sure she would be able to drink her way out.

i don't know about you but the thought of a woman drinking her own breastmilk sure gets me all hot and bothered!

BillSelfsTrophycase · 06-29-2011, 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by booger

i don't know about you but the thought of a woman drinking her own breastmilk sure gets me all hot and bothered!

Those would have to be some floppy flapjacks to make that possible

Just Passin' By · 06-29-2011, 11:34 PM

Until we see the weapons, we can't evaluate the charges.

06-29-2011, 10:15 PM
DaFace Kind of a mod Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Donkey Land Casino cash: $2066899	Drunk Teacher Resists Arrest - Squirts Cops With Breast Milk http://deadspin.com/5816435/drunk-oh...her-breastmilk Drunk Ohio Teacher Resists Arrest, Sprays Cops With Her Breastmilk Jack Dickey — We're not sure we know the precise meaning of the term "hot mess," but this just has to be the perfect application. Meet Stephanie Robinette, 30, a lactating charter-school teacher from Westerville, Ohio (a Columbus suburb), who got drunk, disorderly, and weird over the weekend. Robinette was attending a wedding at the Bridgewater Banquet & Conference Center—the self-proclaimed "premiere banquet facility of Central Ohio"—with her husband, but apparently the two got in a kerfuffle and all hell—or at least several ducts—broke loose. Namely, she hit her husband, locked herself in the car, he phoned the cops, who then arrived and tried to remove her from the car, at which point she squirted the car and the cops with breast milk. And at which point American civilization reached its nadir, until the next time.
Posts: 51,749

06-29-2011, 10:17 PM	#2
Bugeater The Maintenance Guy Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Renovated Bugeater Estate Casino cash: $6252680	I'd hit it.
Posts: 70,443

06-29-2011, 10:18 PM	#3
kysirsoze SNAP THE ****ING BALL!!! Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: KCMO Casino cash: $3796946	This might seriously be the best thread title of all time.
Posts: 11,281

06-29-2011, 10:31 PM	#5
Bwana It's Five O'Clock Somewhere Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Billings, Montana Casino cash: $2139583647	Mr. Kotter? __________________ Adventure is dangerous....but monotony can kill you.
Posts: 69,730

06-29-2011, 10:33 PM	#6
Dante84 Tossed Salad & Scrambled Eggs Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: ATX & OPKS Casino cash: $1821996 VARSITY	Repizzle __________________ ..
Posts: 19,591

06-29-2011, 10:38 PM	#7
SDChiefs Veteran Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Americas Finest City Casino cash: $8260778	Should be in the would you thread.
Posts: 2,320

06-29-2011, 10:52 PM	#9
Stinger Bazinga Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Springfield, MO Casino cash: $4304507	Lucky it was not freezing out side she could have been book on having a congealed weapon. __________________
Posts: 10,179

06-29-2011, 11:16 PM	#10
RedNFeisty Smokin Join Date: May 2003 Location: Wichita Casino cash: $10004900	Why would the police try getting her out the car? As long as she doesn't have the keys, what does it matter? Let her sleep it off in the car. __________________ F.O.C.U.S sportsshrink: Don't bite the hand that feeds you!!!! "We the Fans" feed you Morons!!
Posts: 8,393

06-29-2011, 11:34 PM	#15
Just Passin' By In Search of a Life Join Date: Feb 2009 Casino cash: $5460524	Until we see the weapons, we can't evaluate the charges.
Posts: 69,748