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Old 07-17-2007, 11:38 AM  
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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I'll bet I did something less fun than you did last night.

So...I've got this bottom eyelid infection right now. I think it all traces back to an eye socket injury I had a decade ago, and every two or three years it flares up and gets all swollen and looks like I just got punched in the eye and it hurts to even touch it.

Anyway, it's been messed up for the last week, and I've got some antibiotic eye drops from the doctor that I think are more placebo than anything, but hey, I still take them.

Last night, it started feeling worse, and I was checking it out. Lo and behold, inside the eyelid, in my eye socket, it was swelling up and getting some sort of blister/pus thingie/swollen area of death that was impinging on my eye.

These are the times that separate real men from men who clog up emergency rooms. I knew that it was going to keep getting bigger, and it was just going to get more uncomfortable on my eye as it did.

Remember that scene in Cast Away where Tom Hanks has the rock and the ice skate, and he's whimpering as he's about to remove his abcessed tooth?



So I'm sitting there with a sanitized safety pin and a lot of willpower, breathing deeply and relaxing. Then, slowly, resolutely, surely, I put the safety pin to my eye... pull forward on the eyelid...insert the safety pin...and slowly and steadily poke around until I can destroy the interloper. I missed on the first try or two and started crying tears of blood, but then was able to harpoon my nemesis. After a bit of rinsing and a case of the retroactive willies, I appear to be on the mend.

So how was your evening last night?
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:40 AM   #2
Redrum_69 Redrum_69 is offline
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You realize that if you had flinched and poked your eye..youd have one less eye?


how about next time go see a doctor
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:41 AM   #3
The Pest The Pest is offline
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Wow.....Jesus.

That reminds me of a Tech Sgt. that I used to work with. He had a wart on his hand and it was annoying the hell out of him. So one day he went home and burned the top part off with a soldering iron and then grabbed the root with a pair of needle nose pliers and yanked it out. He had a hole in his hand for the longest time.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:42 AM   #4
TinyEvel TinyEvel is offline
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TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.TinyEvel has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:44 AM   #5
Redrum_69 Redrum_69 is offline
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Different kinds of ailments attack your eyes causing eye infection. It can be due to many reasons but some of the common reasons for this infection is bacteria, viral or foreign object. It is known that people who wear contact lenses are more prone to eye infection due to presence of bacteria.

Some common eye infections are

Pink Eye (Conjunctivitis): It is one of the common infections which causes irritation and leads to redness of the eye. It is an air-borne disease so one has to be very careful.

Stye - Medically known as hordeolum, it is a small harmless lump formed at the base of an eyelash or inside the eyelid.

Blepharitis - It is an inflammation that affects the eyelids, causes itching, burning and irritation.

Orbital Cellulitis - It is the inflammation or infection surrounding the eye. This can get very serious, like losing your eyesight if the required treatment is not provided.

Keratitis (Corneal ulcers) - This is caused due to an injury to the cornea by a foreign body.

Dacryocystitis - An infection which happens to the tear duct.

Some common sign and symptoms are

Redness of eye
Yellow, green discharge
Irritation of the eye
Pain in the eye
Blurred Vision
Watery eye
Swelling of eye
Photophobia
Constant itching

Home remedies for Eye infection

To get rid of stye you can use hot compresses on the swollen lump with the help of hot cloth.

You can make herbal eyewashes by using 1 tsp dried eyebright herb steeped in 1 pint of boiling water. Cool and strain this liquid and use it as eyewash.

Avoid swimming in chlorinated water.

You can make warm compress by using chamomile, lavender or rose oil for conjunctivitis.

Soak aloe vera juice in a cloth to be placed over your eyes to soothe them. Aloe vera juice can be used as eyewash by following similar procedure.

To reduce inflammation and itchiness you can keep cold bread over your eyes.

Make an elderberry blossom tea and use it as eyewash, to soothe your eyes.

Antifreeze works best either poured directly into the eye or injested.

Use artificial tears to moisten your eyes, to flush out the foreign body.

You can put honey directly in your eyes or make honey eyewash by using three tablespoons of honey in two cups of boiling water.

For pink eye(conjunctivitis) fill a glass jar with distilled water and in that add 7-8 Jasmine flowers. Cover it with a lid and leave it overnight. The next morning pour drops of water in your eyes with the jasmine flower. Keep repeating till your eyes get soaked. Do this at least three times a day to notice the difference.

Warning: The reader of this article should exercise all precautionary measures while following instructions on the home remedies from this article. Avoid using any of these products if you are allergic to it. The responsibility lies with the reader and not with the site or the writer.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:45 AM   #6
Gonzo Gonzo is offline
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I have a new found respect for you Rain man.

That took some stones. I'll keep an eye out for ya.
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I loved the guy on top of the pole starting at around 3:15.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:46 AM   #7
Redrum_69 Redrum_69 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gonzo
That took some stones. I'll keep an eye out for ya.


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Old 07-17-2007, 11:47 AM   #8
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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I had no idea that antifreeze was so versatile.

Maybe I should write to whatever site that is, and offer up a new home remedy of poking a safety pin in there. I feel soooooo much better today.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:48 AM   #9
Fire Me Boy! Fire Me Boy! is offline
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About half-way through I started realizing where this was going and actually began reading with both of my hands on my head, as if to say, "Oh my god" with body language.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:49 AM   #10
Redrum_69 Redrum_69 is offline
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I think this thread needs a good song lyric to fit the mood


Hello?
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone home?
Come on, now.
I hear you're feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.
Relax.
I need some information first.
Just the basic facts,
Can you show me where it hurts?
There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ship's smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're sayin'.
When I was a child I had a fever.
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I got that feeling once again.
I can't explain, you would not understand.
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.
Ok.
Just a little pinprick.
There'll be no more ...Aaaaaahhhhh!
But you may feel a little sick.
Can you stand up?
I do believe it's working. Good.
That'll keep you going for the show.
Come on it's time to go.
There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ship's smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're sayin'.
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse,
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone.
I cannot put my finger on it now.
The child is grown, the dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:52 AM   #11
Hog's Gone Fishin Hog's Gone Fishin is offline
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I'll bet you've never had Boar Semen squirted in your eye. Until you have you'll olways hold second fiddle.
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Old 07-17-2007, 11:58 AM   #12
FAX FAX is offline
testing ... 1, 2, 3
 
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There once was a poster called Rain
Who performed a legerdemain
He can make grown men cry
By jabbing pins in his eye
And incising his ophthalmic vein

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Old 07-17-2007, 12:02 PM   #13
Redrum_69 Redrum_69 is offline
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Old 07-17-2007, 12:06 PM   #14
cdcox cdcox is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TinyEvel
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Old 07-17-2007, 12:30 PM   #15
stumppy stumppy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hog Farmer
I'll bet you've never had Boar Semen squirted in your eye. Until you have you'll olways hold second fiddle.
UH.....shouldn't you be pointing that thing the other direction ?


NTTAWWT


Wait a minute.... there is something wrong with that.
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