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Old 03-19-2014, 08:49 PM  
ROYC75 ROYC75 is offline
Time For Your Wake Up Call !!!
 
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Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party.

As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!!

Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: 'Honey,breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian.

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, 'Son, what happened last night?

Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind you fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door. Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean "? I have a rose and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?

His son replies, 'Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, Leave me alone bitch, I'm married!

Broken Coffee Table: $239.99
Hot Breakfast: $4.20
Two Aspirins: $.38

Saying the right thing at the right time......

PRICELESS
Last edited by ROYC75; 03-19-2014 at 09:59 PM..
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ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.ROYC75 has enough rep power to blowy ou to bits.
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Old 03-19-2014, 08:59 PM   #2
Jewish Rabbi Jewish Rabbi is offline
What's up braj?
 
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Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.Jewish Rabbi is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-19-2014, 09:14 PM   #3
In58men In58men is offline
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In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.In58men is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-19-2014, 09:36 PM   #4
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Wow, this doesn't sound like something Jack would do at all. I wonder what happened.
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Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-19-2014, 09:38 PM   #5
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
Inmem 2.0
 
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Too long didn't read
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Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.Titty Meat is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-19-2014, 09:57 PM
Fish
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Old 03-19-2014, 10:24 PM   #6
Jimmya Jimmya is offline
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Nice story.
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Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.Jimmya must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
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Old 03-20-2014, 03:51 AM   #7
ForeverChiefs58 ForeverChiefs58 is offline
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I heard Jack was interested in the chiefs
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ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.ForeverChiefs58 has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
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Old 03-20-2014, 03:56 AM   #8
Pushead2 Pushead2 is offline
**** off
 
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Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.Pushead2 would the whole thing.
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Old 03-20-2014, 05:32 AM   #9
InChiefsHeaven InChiefsHeaven is online now
Rockin' yer FACE OFF!
 
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I thought it was funny.
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Old 03-20-2014, 07:30 AM   #10
BlackHelicopters BlackHelicopters is offline
Spiraling down the Drain
 
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Bring him in for a look?
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BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-20-2014, 07:35 AM   #11
Sully Sully is offline
It Goes On
 
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Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.Sully threw an interception on a screen pass.
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Old 03-20-2014, 08:00 AM   #12
Lzen Lzen is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InChiefsHell View Post
I thought it was funny.
5 years ago?
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Old 03-20-2014, 08:02 AM   #13
Dave Lane Dave Lane is offline
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Quote:
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15 years ago?
FYP
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Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-20-2014, 09:05 AM   #14
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I remember when Jesus Christ used to tell this to all his followers. It always got the crowd into the game.
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Old 03-20-2014, 09:47 AM   #15
Chief Pote Chief Pote is offline
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