Doggity Report - Week Three

[gblowfish]

From my pal Mr. Doggity.

The Doggity Chiefs Report
Week 3 – 2017
Chiefs at Dolts
The Stub - Carson, CA

Overview: In a weekend when stupid bubbled up and rained down and oozed out of every corner, I'm going to attempt something no one else seems to have been able to do, and talk about football. In my only nod to the behaviors of the weekend, I will turn to the Chiefs' emotional leader, Justin Houston who said, "I kneeled, but in a prayer for unity." This pint-sized park was only about half-full, and half of that half was wearing red. This is a real embarrassment for the NFL (as if it needed any help). The game itself was exciting for about 5 minutes at the beginning and end, but a sloppy snoozer for the other 50. The worst part continues to be penalties. KC may be the best team in football right now, but it is also the most penalized, and that has to stop. Yet again, another talented young hot-head drew an "unsportsmanlike" penalty, this time he wasn't named Kelce. The most important part is that it tied the record for most number of consecutive regular-season wins over division opponents by any team since the 1970 merger of the NFL and AFL. Any road win over a team in your division is a thing of beauty, even if it looked pretty ugly at times. With the Broncos, Steelers and Raiders all taking a dump this week, who's your daddy, now?

Offense: Overall, Alex Smith reverted to being the Alex Smith we know, with a very workman-like, efficient showing. He made some good, if not great throws. He was off-target on some attempts to stretch the field. But he threw two TD's (granted, one was a shovel pass, just like last week), and zero picks. Hard to hang it all on Smith, however. The O-line was dreadful in pass protection. And I can't just blame it on I-70 this week. The entire line took water like the Edmund Fitzgerald. And again, way too many penalties. Kelce was shut out, and Hill was limited, but Kareem Hunt came through again with 172 yards, including another very "Jamaal-like" 69 yard TD dagger that finished off the Dolts. This kid gets more impressive every week.

Defense: We finally saw the thievery we have come to expect from Sutton's D, with three picks of Phyllis Rivers in the first quarter. Two by Terrance Mitchell, who has been picked on mercilessly this season. The other by Marcus Peters, who, like Kelce, giveth and taketh away, with his bone-headed inability to control his mouth and temper. Must be something in the air this week. Justin Houston rode the young man like a rented mule, and rightly so. Rivers is one of the hardest QBs in the league to sack, because of his quick release, so while they only managed two sacks, the front 7 got enough pressure to force some really ill-advised throws. Three were picked and another two could have been. Houston has taken over Eric Berry's role as the heart, soul and conscience of this unit. But like the other side of the ball, they need to clean up the penalties.

Specials: The Petite Brazilian nearly got his leg ripped off on a FG attempt, resulting in a 15 yard penalty against the Dolts, and a shorter attempt. Colquitt dropped 3 of 5 inside the 20. Akeem Hunt (not to be confused with Kareem Hunt), managed a 33 yard average on returns, by far the best this season. Like last week, the Specials were again involved in a really stupid play. This time a fake punt that went nowhere, and set up a short field for Rivers. Thankfully, it ultimately didn't matter.

Doggity Dog – With Travis Kelce's picture on a milk carton this week, I feel I need to stay true to form, and "award" Marcus Peters for cussing at an official, and drawing an "unsportsmanlike" flag. Regardless of what else anyone does, that's always going to get the "dog" from me, because it is inexcusable.

Give Him a Bone – Hard not to give it to Hunt, but because he's been picked on and beat up so much, I'm going with Terrance Mitchell, who had a phenomenal game against one of the best passing offenses in the NFL.

The Rest of the West -
The Las Vegas Criminals – Punked by the Washington Indigenous Pejoratives in DC, the Faders looked really terrible. Derek Carr in particular, looked lost.

The 420 Donkeys – Shuffled by Buffalo. Siemien looked like garbage, but Jamaal had flashes of the old Jamaal, with 9 for 56 and a score.

The Lost Angel Dolts – As noted above. Man that stadium looks dreadful. The Dolts have a lot of talent. Their greatest talent seems to be their ability to find creative ways to lose.

Next up – Back home to host the Washington Politically Incorrects
at the Head.

Your faithful Scribe,
Mr. Doggity.

[Halfcan]

Nice one!

I loved how Houston got in Peter's face and told him What's What. Nobody disrespects Houston-period.

[Buehler445]

Edmund Fitzgerald.

You can let him know I'll be stealing that.

[Sandy Vagina]

Definitely worthwhile read, thanks to you both (writing it and posting it).

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by Halfcan

Nice one!

I loved how Houston got in Peter's face and told him What's What. Nobody disrespects Houston-period.

Look at how big, strong and fast he is. Nobody is giving him shit. Unless they want to die.

Seriously though. I was more happy that he was notably disgusted with himself when he missed a tackle than getting in Peters face. I've seen enough douches execute like middle schoolers and be happy about it. Hopefully that era of Chiefs football is over.

[Simply Red]

Originally Posted by Sandy Vagina

Definitely worthwhile read, thanks to you both (writing it and posting it).

you seem nice.

[underEJ]

I kneeled, but in prayer for Mitch Morse's foot. Not loving the line without him.

Speaking of snapping, hail to Colquitt for still punting nicely with those awful long snaps.

It is hard to watch Jamaal with them, but then I watch Hunt and feel much better.

[Bwana]

Nice, good read.