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Old 09-30-2012, 06:47 PM  
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Ten Things About Today's Game

Ten Things About Today's Game

10. Well, that wasn't so good, was it?

You would think a team playing for a share of the division lead, at home, in perfect weather, coming off a big come from behind road win on Chiefs alumni day, would not brown out in their collective shorts. But shat in the shorts they did. Big time, massive stinkage. If you didn't get to watch the game, good for you. You were spared three hours of your life you would never have gotten back. I'm going to give you the speed reading version of the game, so you can re-live the horror in double quick time. I don't think I've ever seen a worst first half of Chiefs football at home, ever. And that's saying something.

9. First Quarter: Refs come out for the coin toss, people cheer the "real" refs. SD wins the toss, takes the ball. Special teams guys come on the field all chippy, picking fights from the opening kickoff. First SD series, Berry gets a PI penalty on a third and 10 trying to cover Antonio Gates, sustaining a SD drive. Fans boo the refs mercilessly. SD pushes in our shit all the way down the field, five minutes in, score on an easy four yard pass to Royal, SD goes up right out of the gate 7-0. KC gets the ball back, special teams guys are chippy on the kickoff. Casshole tries to move the team, under throws Bowe by a good five yards, pick by Weddle (turnover #1). SD gets a gimme 24-yard field goal, it's now 10-0 SD nine minutes into the game. SD kicks off, KC gets ball on the twenty. Moeaki jumps offsides on first play from scrimmage. Next play, Charles gets the ball ripped out (turnover #2), SD gets the ball on KC five yard line. Two plays later, Jackie Battle easily scores. Ten minutes into the game, SD 17-0. Stadium music guy plays Quiet Riot doing "We're Not Gonna Take It." KC gets the ball back, Casshole throws a three yard pass to Baldwin on 3rd and 10. It's a three and out, KC punts.

8. Second Quarter: Casshole drops back, gets whacked, tries to fumble but refs call it an incomplete pass. Couple of plays later Casshole actually hits Bowe in stride on a 36 yarder that could have turned the game momentum, but Winston is called for lining up too deep behind the center, and play is called back. Very next play, Winston and Gray both fail to pick up a blitzing Phillips, Casshole gets whacked, fumbles, KC thankfully gets the ball back. KC loses all momentum, punt. Gates beats Berry downfield again, SD kicks a 47-yard field goal with a back up kicker, now it's 20-0 with eight minutes left in the half. Chiefs get ball back. First play from scrimmage, Charles fumbles again (turnover #3). Luckily, Chiefs get the ball back on a Phyllis Rivers' terrible throw towards Flowers. Charles then scores on a busted play. Fans go ape shit. Chiefs respond by blowing the extra point on a bad snap. Now it's 20-6 SD with five minutes left in the half. KC holds, gets ball back with about three minutes left in the half on their own twenty. Moeaki jumps off sides, again. Casshole misses Gray on a pass, then on 2nd and 15 throws a ball behind Moeaki, it bounces off his hands, right to Butler for SD (turnover #4), now it's 27-6 and any momentum from the Charles TD is lost. Stadium music guy plays The Ramones "I Wanna Be Sedated." Chiefs get ball back, go into two minute drill, and work all the way down to the SD 22 Yard line with :46 left. Casshole fires a pass at an injured McCluster, ball goes right through his hands to SD defensive back (turnover #5). SD takes a knee. At least we get the ball to start the second half.


7. Third Quarter: Chiefs do what they needed to do to have any conceivable chance at all: they get the opening kickoff and have a scoring drive. Charles gets his second TD on a swing pass, Chiefs hold SD scoreless for awhile. In a big series they sack Phyllis Rivers on his own one yard line and force a punt. Arenas gets a nice return to midfield. But Hartman is holding on the play, moves KC back to the 37. Field position lost. On third and three, Casshole overthrows Bowe on a fly pattern by ten yards. Three and out, KC punts, never gets a sniff the rest of the day.

6. Fourth Quarter: Draughn is now in, as Charles has been used like a paper towel again this week (17 carries, 92 yards). Right at the start of the quarter, Casshole calls a draw play on 3rd and 14. Draughn gets whacked, fumbles at mid field (turnover #6.) SD gets the ball and runs clock down to 7:54, Battle catches a pass in the end zone uncovered, easy TD, SD now up 34-14. Now it's classic Casshole garbage time. He under throws a TD to a wide open Bowe (Bowe has to wait for the football to come down), KC draws to 34-20, but is still two TDs behind. There's now about five and a half minutes left. Romeo does NOT onside kick. He kicks off. SD runs the ball up our ass. Runs the clock down to two minutes, kicks another FG, goes up 37-20, a three possession lead with two minutes left. Stadium is totally vacant:
Casshole goes into warp garbage time mode. Actually gets a delay of game with :11 left. His final pass? A 13-yard in bounds pitch to Baldwin on a 3rd and 15. So he throws short of a first down again. Game over, we lose.

5. OK, so what do we take from all this? General observations on defense: We've been outscored by 33 points in two home games. That's shameful defense at home. Hali today had one sack, the one on Rivers at the one yard line. Houston did nada today. You can't just disappear like that. Belcher is great on stopping the run, but he can't cover a back in the flat to save his ass. He is miserably bad on pass coverage. If you can't cover Jackie Battle, then you monumentally suck. Eric Berry may have played his worst game as a professional today. Antonio Gates owned him, simply owned him, all day long. I don't think Berry is nearly back from his knee injury, maybe 70%, but that's about it. Daniels and Routt were both missing tackles. Save for an injured Flowers the secondary pretty much stunk up the joint today. The only bright spot -if you want to call it that- was Ropati Pitoitua -lets call him Ratboy Pituitary, since nobody in this hemisphere can pronounce his name. Ratboy had two sacks, which is what one would expect to get from the first round pick Dorsey who he replaced today. Dorsey is expendable. Ratboy did more in one game to pressure a QB than Dorsey has done in his entire Chiefs career. Ratboy came to play.

4. Stupid Penalties: Nine for eighty yards. Chiefs came into this week being one of the least penalized teams in the NFL. Now with the real refs, we see what they really are. A poorly disciplined bunch who continually kill their own momentum with stupid, stupid penalties. Moeaki and Winston should be forced to kick one another in the nads for their combined penalty day. Both hurt this team over and over.

3. The Duke of Dink: I bet the guy who went to the game with me that Casshole would throw short on third down at least four times today. I counted three times. Too many other times they were too busy either fumbling or throwing picks. Casshole's accuracy, or lack of it, it appalling for a starting NFL QB. He's high, he's behind guys, he's over or under throwing. He guns it when a touch pass would suffice. He has no feel for the passing game. He is abysmal. I stayed for the whole game. I know you guys who watch on TV hear the booing, but the fans where I sit were really blasting Casshole today. They called him (among other things) a terrible leader, a choker, a quitter, a giant bag of suck, and a pussy. They also called for (in order of popularity): Quinn, Stanzi, Grbac, Bono, Thigpen and Palko. You KNOW you suck like a Hoover when your home fans are begging for Tyler Palko. The stadium CIA wanks (who were back behind the bench again today)

really gave the fans the ole stink eye when they were yelling at Casshole. The natives are indeed restless. So if you were yelling at home, believe me, they were also yelling for you right behind the Chiefs bench.

2. There were only a couple of things I really enjoyed during the crap fest of a day. One, they put the Chiefs Hall of Honor ring back up in the stadium. Its now across the very top ring, with the player name and number. I took a picture:

And at halftime they inducted Will Shields as the latest member of the Chiefs Hall of Honor. Well deserved, he played his whole career here and should be in Canton someday. They had sixty former Chiefs players show up to honor him.

Very nice day for Will, and well deserved. Here's his picture up on the stadium video board during the ceremony:


1. I'm afraid to say, I don't think we have a very good team on our hands this year. We'll be lucky to win six or seven games at this rate. The offense is terrible save for Charles. Our gaudy offensive stats mean nothing. We've never led a game this year, even in New Orleans we only won with an OT kick. The defense is way too porous. I think we're seriously missing both Brandon Carr and Kendrick Lewis, and of those who are left in the secondary, Flowers is gimpy, and Berry is only a shadow of what he was before the injury. Routt can't tackle. Today DJ got dinged up in the fourth quarter. Hali has done very little for an All Pro. Poe, our first round draft pick, was on the bench in the fourth quarter. Why not give the kid some reps, and let him get some experience against an AFC West opponent that he's going to see over and over again in the course of his career? I just don't get a lot of the personnel moves. I believe Casshole will not make it through the year again this year, as he's bound to get destroyed, maybe even next week against Baltimore. If you think San Diego's defense was good, just think was Ray Ray and Company is going to do to this offense next week. Shudder to think, shudder to think.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:24 PM   #16
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Those are a bunch of really horrible things, Mr. gblowfish.

And one good thing. It was nice that so many players turned out for Shields. He's a great example of a great player whose career was essentially wasted on this cat puke of a team.

Sorry you had to endure all that, but I'm very proud of you for screaming obscenities at Cassel. Good job, there.

Also, have we yet determined the purpose and meaning of the CIA operatives? Anybody leaked anything on them ... other than used beer?

FAX
I'm guessing Pioli has a mole here that reads how we all post about how we want Cassel to break his neck or fall out of a plane. Hell I think I even joked once how if Cassel got sniped, I'd immediately think it was Clay. So then in fear for his nancy boy Cassel, Pioli hired a security team behind the bench.

That's my theory and I'm sticking to it. Now we gotta figure out who the mole is. LAChiefsFan?
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:25 PM   #17
Lonewolf Ed Lonewolf Ed is offline
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Great write up, as usual. May I point out, however, that Twisted Sister and not Quiet Riot, play that song "We're Not Gonna Take It." I wonder if the selection was meant more for the fans than the players?
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:27 PM   #18
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At what point does the "loudest stadium in the NFL" thing become false advertising? That probably hadn't been true in the 21st century.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:27 PM   #19
Bugeater Bugeater is offline
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The CIA operatives tell you all you need to know about how ****ing clueless this organization is.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:29 PM   #20
lcarus lcarus is offline
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At what point does the "loudest stadium in the NFL" thing become false advertising? That probably hadn't been true in the 21st century.
It was still loud at points during the Vermeil era. Once the Herm era started...
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:33 PM   #21
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At what point does the "loudest stadium in the NFL" thing become false advertising? That probably hadn't been true in the 21st century.
I was at a couple of games where the "Fire Carl and Herm" yelling was really, really loud. I think we can hit that volume again pretty soon.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:36 PM   #22
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Great post as always. Happy to hear fans in your section were giving Cassel a tongue lashing. Cassel can't hear me from my seat, and that old drunk lady wasn't there to yell at me for being mean to him, so I made a makeshift sign out of one of those roster/program thingies that said "Cassel is not very good." I held it up with an angry, determined look on my face through the 4th quarter and after the end of the game.

It wasn't much, but it made me feel better. I at least had some fun for about 20 minutes.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:39 PM   #23
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Great write up, as usual. May I point out, however, that Twisted Sister and not Quiet Riot, play that song "We're Not Gonna Take It." I wonder if the selection was meant more for the fans than the players?
Sorry, had my 80's hair bands mixed up. Rep to you, sir.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:42 PM   #24
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I'm amazed you still have the motivation to do these things. Props for the dedication, though.
2nd always a good read.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:45 PM   #25
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Romeo said this after today's game:

"I don't understand what happened with the team."

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Old 09-30-2012, 07:47 PM   #26
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The CIA operatives tell you all you need to know about how ****ing clueless this organization is.
If they were CIA you would never know they were there, those are Secret Service cats.
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Old 09-30-2012, 07:53 PM   #27
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If they were CIA you would never know they were there, those are Secret Service cats.
That's what they want you to think
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Old 09-30-2012, 08:18 PM   #28
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I'm amazed you still have the motivation to do these things. Props for the dedication, though.
No shit. George has all-world fortitude.

Nice read, as usual.
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Old 09-30-2012, 08:20 PM   #29
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Romeo said this after today's game:

"I don't understand what happened with the team."

****, Romeo's like 65 or something right?

That's too early to be senile.
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Old 09-30-2012, 08:33 PM   #30
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My section started the "Brady" (a la Rudy) chant today. It was pretty funny.
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