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Old 10-21-2009, 11:41 PM  
Silock Silock is offline
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Next time you get pulled over... Do this.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showt...did=2055684400

I don't get to see my girflriend too much because I work so many hours a week that it's almost impossible. That, mixed with her schedule, doesn't make for much time to see her. When I do find time to see her, I fly from work to her house going 90 in a 55 MPH zone.

That being said, Monday I was speeding to her house from work. I was on a local highway and about 5 minutes from her house when the blue lights blinded my eyes from my rear-view mirror. Damn, I've just been pulled over.

The officer walked up to my car, asked how I was doing, then the usual "license and registration, please". Nothing out of the ordinary.

I carry a gun for my profession and still had it strapped to my side, so I showed him my work ID and gun permit BEFORE whipping out the gun and saying:

"Here's my gun! I'm allowed to carry one!"

Phew, won't do that one again.

After looking over the permit, he eyeballed my crotch.

"I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car, sir. Keep your hands where I can see them."

Either he's a gay cop, or he has a problem with the gun.

I was asked to put my hands on the roof of the car. He pulled my 357 out of its holder.

"I'm going to hold onto this while I run your license, if you don't mind. You can step back into the car."

I got in and shut my door.

"So, Mr. Justin, why were you driving so fast?"

At this moment, my bull**** dispenser started cranking. I could afford another ticket, but would rather not deal with an increased insurance rate. I started spitting a line of total BS.

"Well sir, my job doesn't allow me to see my fiance very much. Since this is the first time in forever that I'm going to see her, I'm rushing to her house to pop the question. I apologize for speeding, I'm just so excited to see the look on her face when I ask her to marry me."

"Do you have a ring?"

"No sir, can't afford one."

"Ah, poor kid."

"I know. Could you do me a favor and write me a ticket? I'd like to look back on this night and laugh about the time I was pulled over and given a ticket the night I was rushing to propose to my wife."

The reason I asked him this is to make my story seem to check out. I'm calling his bluff, if you will.

"Haha, you kids. I'll tell you what-- I'll do you one better. I'll escort you over there through traffic if you're in that much of a rush. Wouldn't that be more of a story?"

Damnit. The guy's caught up in making a Kodak moment when all I want to do is get him off my back and eat tacos with my girlfriend... NOT propose. I've only known the girl for two months-- not exactly ready for the big commitment yet.

"Yes sir, I do believe it would."

After giving him her street name and address, he knew exactly where to go. ****. I got in my car and followed him as his siren rang out. Traffic pulled to the side, peopled yielded at red lights, and cars stopped-- all so I could have tacos with my girlfriend.

After getting to her house, the officer stepped out of his car and knocked on her door. She opened it and stared at him, then me in a look of confusion.

"Hi, I pulled this gentleman over a few minutes ago because he was in a rush to get over here so fast. Justin? Would you like to take it from here?"

I looked at Courtney, then the officer, who wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. I tried to take her inside, but the officer stood right there in the doorway to witness the event. The things I'd do to get out of a ticket.

"Courtney... I know I've only known you a short time. But, in that short time ... Will you marry me?"

She wouldn't say yes. She's younger than I am and always talked about how she wanted to date a guy forever until making a commitment.

''YES JUSTIN! I WILL MARRY YOU!"

The officer smiled and clapped as Courtney clamped her arms around my body. The neighbors, who had been wondering why a cop car with its lights on was outside her house cheered.

Courtney's parents called me and told me that they were proud that their daughter found such a nice guy.

Me? Well I got out of a ticket.

**** you. I'm engaged.

-Sideburns
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Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Silock has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 10-22-2009, 07:27 AM   #16
burt burt is offline
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Did you get laid, tho?????
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Old 10-22-2009, 07:29 AM   #17
JohninGpt JohninGpt is offline
Dammit
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by big nasty kcnut View Post
Damn that messed up. take the ticket.
No kidding, a ticket is a one time fine, marriage is a life sentence.
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Old 10-22-2009, 07:36 AM   #18
crazycoffey crazycoffey is offline
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Did you get to eat your tacos?
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Old 10-22-2009, 07:54 AM   #19
ROYC75 ROYC75 is offline
Time For Your Wake Up Call !!!
 
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Life sentence !

Book him Dan O !
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ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ROYC75 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:02 AM   #20
Crashride Crashride is offline
We got DANCERS in tampa
 
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This is ****ing hilarious.
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Crashride is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.Crashride is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:09 AM   #21
Chief Chief Chief Chief is offline
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After her verbal affirmation to your question, you then should have sealed the deal by letting her finger your gun while you ate her taco.
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:19 AM   #22
KcFanInGA KcFanInGA is offline
I just peed a little on my leg
 
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Ha..Hahaha! Nice! If the marriage works out (and I hope it does)....best...story...ever.
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:30 AM
Buzz
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:37 AM   #23
Fish Fish is online now
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What kind of cop would actually believe that?
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:39 AM   #24
chasedude chasedude is offline
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poor guy, such a horrible story. should've taken the ticket
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:55 AM   #25
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
Besides, big day tomorrow
 
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He thought the insurance was going to be expensive?


Shit, wait until the alimony and child support go on his record.
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Old 10-22-2009, 09:00 AM   #26
HemiEd HemiEd is online now
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Congrats, nice story. Has anyone mentioned that the ticket would have been cheaper?
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Old 10-22-2009, 09:02 AM   #27
KCUnited KCUnited is online now
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Suicide by cop.
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Old 10-22-2009, 09:05 AM   #28
Pestilence Pestilence is online now
The future is now.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PhillyChiefFan View Post
Nice.



If she was already his fiance, wouldn't the deed already be done?
He's explaining how she BECAME his fiance.
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Old 10-22-2009, 09:29 AM   #29
mikeyis4dcats. mikeyis4dcats. is online now
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I can't believe ANY of you believe that story is true.
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Old 10-22-2009, 09:50 AM   #30
kaplin42 kaplin42 is offline
Thats Right, Sniff the Glue!!!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KC Fish View Post
What kind of cop would actually believe that?

I doubt the cop believed him. More like the cop with F'ing with the dude, and was having a little fun. How many lame excuses do you think a cop has to go through every night, and how fun for a cop be just to get a little pay back on the pretense of helping someone out.
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kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.kaplin42 would the whole thing.
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