Poop Had a shit day... anyone else? - Page 2

Nickhead · 08-16-2017, 02:42 AM

so i have been building this pvc clear tarped greenhouse cover for the garden. the only thing holding me back was the nail gun. so i got the gun... got the cover installed. but i left one of four corners unbraced, and the bottom lateral overlap unsecured. i thought, ill finish it tomorrow. so i wake up to my normal morning shit. the cats are hungry as i starve them while i turd it out. i walk into the dining room to feed the cats, done. then i walk back towards my office and look out the kitchen window and THE WHOLE ****ING THING COLLAPSED due to high winds overnight. so what took me six hours to construct, it took the wind less than ten minutes to take down.

so two hours later, the neighbor rings the doorbell and wakes my wife on a sleepin day (she's off this week). he tells me, are you missing a cat, as there is one in your tree. im like, no, they are all inside, but a pet is a pet.

so two hours later, after trimming half my tree to let the kitty down slowly, my wife is slashed open on her hand trying to help this cat ( i swear we are ****ing cat people, we have four already ) I finally, get it in the carrier, i think the cat thanked us at this point. so i take it to three different vets (not chipped) to see if any reports. nope, nada. take it to the pound. okay. so i take the cat to the pound and due to the number of dogs running free, the cat bites straight thru my thumb and index finger. takes off and jumps up into the top barbed wire of the dog drop off. no way im getting to it besides the fact i am bleeding, covered in cat piss and angry the prick bit me while i saved him. so i left, went home laundered my clothes, bathed and called the ranger and told him the same story.

so tomorrow i am playing the lottery.

ive got worse 24 hour span stories, what are yours?

**BigRichard** · 08-16-2017, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nickhead

all of a sudden my day doesn't seem so bad, at least i never have a milk mustache.

**Rain Man** · 08-16-2017, 03:20 PM

I had a colonoscopy today, but that was actually kind of easy and my colon is as healthy as Seal Team Six. I had to fast for 36 hours before that while drinking a gallon of some sort of laxative. However, before the 36 hours, I had food poisoning that kept me from eating for another 36 hours, so this week has been rough. Things are looking up now, though.

**Iowanian** · 08-16-2017, 03:20 PM

In my experience that isn't in the neighborhood of a shit day.

Except for Rainman...that's the definition of a shit day.

Rasputin · 08-16-2017, 09:12 PM

Woke up this morning, my dog was dead,
Someone disliked him and shot him through the head.

Woke up this morning, my cat had died,
I know I'll miss her, sat down and cried.

Came home this evening, my hog was gone,
People here don't like me, I think I'll soon move on.

Now somethings happened, that would make a saint frown,
I turned my back and my house burned down

Read more: Nazareth - Woke Up This Morning Lyrics | MetroLyrics

GloryDayz · 08-16-2017, 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I had a colonoscopy today, but that was actually kind of easy and my colon is as healthy as Seal Team Six. I had to fast for 36 hours before that while drinking a gallon of some sort of laxative. However, before the 36 hours, I had food poisoning that kept me from eating for another 36 hours, so this week has been rough. Things are looking up now, though.

Lost 10lbs and got anal. That usually sounds like a good day, but you were on the receiving end of the anal, so it sucked.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G920A using Tapatalk

**Buehler445** · 08-16-2017, 10:33 PM

I shit everyday.

Healthy bowel movements are paramount.

Reerun_KC · 08-16-2017, 10:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445

I shit everyday.

Healthy bowel movements are paramount.

Those are better than dammit days.

**Rain Man** · 08-16-2017, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445

I shit everyday.

Healthy bowel movements are paramount.

I learned today that I have a healthy colon, and I developed a newfound respect for anesthesia. Anesthesia is truly miraculous.

**Rain Man** · 08-16-2017, 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GloryDayz

Lost 10lbs and got anal. That usually sounds like a good day, but you were on the receiving end of the anal, so it sucked.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G920A using Tapatalk

I am as svelte as a panther right now. And also see my earlier comment about anesthesia being a really good thing.

Nickhead · 08-16-2017, 11:13 PM

i wouldn't shit any of you, you are my favorite turds

**007** · 08-17-2017, 02:55 AM

I'm joining you on this shit day. This has been a shit night for me. Can't wait for it to be over.

Nickhead · 08-17-2017, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 007

I'm joining you on this shit day. This has been a shit night for me. Can't wait for it to be over.

not sure i can help you, but in order to get over my issues, i am doing home made asian bbq chicken wings and potato wedges with sweet chili sauce and sour cream.

****, i forgot to play the lottery, just my luck. but i did get a 1600 dollar refund on my taxes because the government felt bad i lost my job.

threebag · 08-17-2017, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I had a colonoscopy today, but that was actually kind of easy and my colon is as healthy as Seal Team Six. I had to fast for 36 hours before that while drinking a gallon of some sort of laxative. However, before the 36 hours, I had food poisoning that kept me from eating for another 36 hours, so this week has been rough. Things are looking up now, though.

Wendy's?

GloryDayz · 08-17-2017, 11:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I am as svelte as a panther right now. And also see my earlier comment about anesthesia being a really good thing.

**Rain Man** · 08-17-2017, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by threebag02

Wendy's?

I have no proof, but the most likely suspect is a piece of cheesecake. The waitress tried to talk me into the brownie instead, but no, I felt like having cheesecake. Give me the cheesecake, I said, and put that mysterious cherry sauce on it.

08-16-2017, 02:42 AM
Nickhead EvOlVeD Join Date: Jun 2016 Location: Blue Mountains, Australia Casino cash: $2559868	Had a shit day... anyone else? so i have been building this pvc clear tarped greenhouse cover for the garden. the only thing holding me back was the nail gun. so i got the gun... got the cover installed. but i left one of four corners unbraced, and the bottom lateral overlap unsecured. i thought, ill finish it tomorrow. so i wake up to my normal morning shit. the cats are hungry as i starve them while i turd it out. i walk into the dining room to feed the cats, done. then i walk back towards my office and look out the kitchen window and THE WHOLE **ING THING COLLAPSED due to high winds overnight. so what took me six hours to construct, it took the wind less than ten minutes to take down. so two hours later, the neighbor rings the doorbell and wakes my wife on a sleepin day (she's off this week). he tells me, are you missing a cat, as there is one in your tree. im like, no, they are all inside, but a pet is a pet. so two hours later, after trimming half my tree to let the kitty down slowly, my wife is slashed open on her hand trying to help this cat ( i swear we are **ing cat people, we have four already ) I finally, get it in the carrier, i think the cat thanked us at this point. so i take it to three different vets (not chipped) to see if any reports. nope, nada. take it to the pound. okay. so i take the cat to the pound and due to the number of dogs running free, the cat bites straight thru my thumb and index finger. takes off and jumps up into the top barbed wire of the dog drop off. no way im getting to it besides the fact i am bleeding, covered in cat piss and angry the prick bit me while i saved him. so i left, went home laundered my clothes, bathed and called the ranger and told him the same story. so tomorrow i am playing the lottery. ive got worse 24 hour span stories, what are yours?
Posts: 8,220

08-16-2017, 03:20 PM	#17
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3348491 VARSITY	I had a colonoscopy today, but that was actually kind of easy and my colon is as healthy as Seal Team Six. I had to fast for 36 hours before that while drinking a gallon of some sort of laxative. However, before the 36 hours, I had food poisoning that kept me from eating for another 36 hours, so this week has been rough. Things are looking up now, though. __________________ I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,251

08-16-2017, 03:20 PM	#18
Iowanian Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Utopia Casino cash: $4788454	In my experience that isn't in the neighborhood of a shit day. Except for Rainman...that's the definition of a shit day.
Posts: 61,520

08-16-2017, 09:12 PM	#19
Rasputin Tip of the hat LIV Champs Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: ks Casino cash: $3505421	Woke up this morning, my dog was dead, Someone disliked him and shot him through the head. Woke up this morning, my cat had died, I know I'll miss her, sat down and cried. Came home this evening, my hog was gone, People here don't like me, I think I'll soon move on. Now somethings happened, that would make a saint frown, I turned my back and my house burned down Read more: Nazareth - Woke Up This Morning Lyrics \| MetroLyrics __________________ A Brave Man Once Requested Me To Answer Questions That Are Key 'Is It To Be Or Not To Be' And I Replied Oh Why Ask Me
Posts: 54,959

08-16-2017, 10:33 PM	#21
Buehler445 Supporter Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Scott City KS Casino cash: $2344734	I shit everyday. Healthy bowel movements are paramount.
Posts: 56,766

08-16-2017, 11:13 PM	#25
Nickhead EvOlVeD Join Date: Jun 2016 Location: Blue Mountains, Australia Casino cash: $2559868	i wouldn't shit any of you, you are my favorite turds
Posts: 8,220

08-17-2017, 02:55 AM	#26
007 Shaken. Not stirred. Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: London Casino cash: $14060126 VARSITY	I'm joining you on this shit day. This has been a shit night for me. Can't wait for it to be over. __________________ My dear girl, there are some things that just aren’t done. Such as, drinking Dom Perignon ’53 above the temperature of 38 degrees Fahrenheit. That’s just as bad as listening to the Beatles without earmuffs.
Posts: 65,554