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View Poll Results: Who wins?
kysirsoze 11 27.50%
Bwana 29 72.50%
Voters: 40. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 09-15-2018, 01:47 PM  
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Gladiator 2018 - Round 6 Championship Match - kysirsoze versus Bwana

This is it. The long-awaited championship match. One of these two combatants will lift the coveted Chiefsplanet Gladiatorial trophy.

Vote for the person that you think would win this match in a battle to death or submission. As background, assume that prior to the tournament you received 10 minutes of training on every weapon. The time listed is the amount of time before the match where you learn what the weaponry and venue is. All participants are handed their weapons at t=0 unless stated otherwise.


Venue - Backstage at the Broadway production of*Madison (actors and staff present)
Starting Distance - 99 feet

kysirsoze

Main Weapon - Battle Axe
Backup Weapon - Bo Staff

Prep Time - 2 Minutes
Special Factors - You were kneed in the groin three times by actress Jennifer Lawrence at time t= -5 seconds, right after she was told that she's paid less than her male costars.

Bwana

Main Weapon - Two Handed Sword
Backup Weapon - A loop of piano wire with handles and a loud shrill whistle

Prep Time - 7 Minutes
Special Factors - Any people who might be present (other than an audience) believe you are the villain
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Old 09-15-2018, 02:09 PM   #2
Sofa King Sofa King is offline
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Tough matchup. Let’s hear from the contestants.
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Old 09-15-2018, 02:12 PM   #3
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post

kysirsoze

Special Factors - You were kneed in the groin three times by actress Jennifer Lawrence at time t= -5 seconds
Oh man!

My twins hurt just reading about your triple nard shot. Sorry Kysirsoze, you're not recovering fast enough to put up any kind of fight when I only have to cover a little over 30 yards to reach you. If it's any consolation, I'll also kill of Jennifer Lawrence before I leave.
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Old 09-15-2018, 02:22 PM   #4
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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Bawan will cleave poor kysirsoze in half with his Claymore
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Old 09-15-2018, 03:13 PM   #5
Beef Supreme Beef Supreme is offline
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The nut shot special factor is brutal.
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Old 09-15-2018, 03:32 PM   #6
Buehler445 Buehler445 is offline
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All the people in the arena might think he’s the villain but I’m not bullrushing anyone with a sword.

Nutshot is killer.
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Old 09-15-2018, 03:39 PM   #7
vailpass vailpass is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beef Supreme View Post
The nut shot special factor is brutal.
This. Bawan would have had the edge in a straight up duel but taking a knee to the bag 5 seconds before being charged with a sword?
Sorry soze, you battled valiantly to get here, but there can be only one.
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Old 09-15-2018, 04:33 PM   #8
kysirsoze kysirsoze is offline
SNAP THE ****ING BALL!!!
 
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Easy win. I give the bo staff to the biggest stage hand and now it's two on one. No way he beats me with the help. Not to mention other people will join in.
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Old 09-15-2018, 04:34 PM   #9
kysirsoze kysirsoze is offline
SNAP THE ****ING BALL!!!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Buehler445 View Post
All the people in the arena might think hes the villain but Im not bullrushing anyone with a sword.

Nutshot is killer.
A backstage full of people who see him as a villain. I scream "he's trying to kill me!". I get more help than I need. End of match.
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Old 09-15-2018, 04:37 PM   #10
kysirsoze kysirsoze is offline
SNAP THE ****ING BALL!!!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bwana View Post
Oh man!

My twins hurt just reading about your triple nard shot. Sorry Kysirsoze, you're not recovering fast enough to put up any kind of fight when I only have to cover a little over 30 yards to reach you. If it's any consolation, I'll also kill of Jennifer Lawrence before I leave.
Sword or no, you're not making it 30 yards accosted. You will be mobbed and beaten preparing you for a skull splitting axe blow.
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Old 09-15-2018, 05:06 PM   #11
TrackyJohnJohn TrackyJohnJohn is offline
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I'm assuming the people still voting aren't even reading the thread. Bwana has no chance here. He's outnumbered 100 to 1. One knee from JLaw doesn't change that.
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Old 09-15-2018, 07:08 PM   #12
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kysirsoze View Post
A backstage full of people who see him as a villain. I scream "he's trying to kill me!". I get more help than I need. End of match.
Sure........

Yeah Broadway types are going to come at some guy swinging a sword? A few people back stage may see me as the enemy, but what are they going to do, come after me and face death? If you're lucky, I may get hit with a stray purse which will not be much of a distraction.

Meanwhile, you will be nursing your nads which have not been stuck not once, but THREE times. Dude, you're not getting up. Prepare for a dirt nap.
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Last edited by Bwana; 09-15-2018 at 07:17 PM..
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Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 09-15-2018, 07:09 PM   #13
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TrackyJohnJohn View Post
I'm assuming the people still voting aren't even reading the thread. Bwana has no chance here. He's outnumbered 100 to 1. One knee from JLaw doesn't change that.
Who's mult is this?
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Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bwana is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 09-15-2018, 09:41 PM   #14
kysirsoze kysirsoze is offline
SNAP THE ****ING BALL!!!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bwana View Post
Sure........

Yeah Broadway types are going to come at some guy swinging a sword? A few people back stage may see me as the enemy, but what are they going to do, come after me and face death? If you're lucky, I may get hit with a stray purse which will not be much of a distraction.

Meanwhile, you will be nursing your nads which have not been stuck not once, but THREE times. Dude, you're not getting up. Prepare for a dirt nap.
"Broadway types"? You clearly haven't been backstage at a Broadway show. Professional stage hands are not only strong as hell, they are like the most macho ****ing guys on the planet. The do nothing but snort coke and swap stories about touring with Bon Jovi. You would be ****ing mobbed in a heartbeat. I won't even have to lift my axe.
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Old 09-15-2018, 09:57 PM   #15
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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Wait...
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