Life An open letter to Buck - Page 3

**TinyEvel** · 07-14-2010, 04:35 PM

Dear buck, BuckinKeading, Matt, etc...

I love you Buck. You are like the girl I would kiss and then punch and throw in a well. I mean, I would love to cornhole you and then go full Mel Gibson on your ass via cel phone and text message then post pics of you throwing up in your prom dress on FaceBook, then I would call you the next morning and ask if you'd like to go for waffles and try to get a BJ in the car on the way home.

I love you and hate you at the same time. You are hot but also ugly. You have shitty breath and only one good tit, while the other one with the mole on it is still OK but not really pic-worthy. I will exhaust myself trying to take one-tit pics of you.

I put up with you because I like to keep you around so I can tell my friends you take it up the ass, even though you don't. And on occasion you show up looking pretty good but always end up getting too drunk and embarrassing yourself and I have to take you home and hold your hair while you vomit in the pan my dad drains his Chevy oil in out back behind the garage and I have to ask the nosey neighbors to go back inside their house -- that it's nothing -- just a sick friend who got car sick and whose barf just happens to smell like peach schnapps.

I love the way you snort when you laugh and hate the way you snort when you sleep. I want to buy you something from Victoria Secret catalogue but then throw it in the garbage when it arrives because I don't want you knowing that I am that into you. However I will sniff it and whack off to it before I throw it away. Did I say that out loud?

I want to make you a breakup tape and then play it while I fuck you for two minutes and hold you for 58 minutes. I want to take you to Arby's get an ARBY-Q and two packets of Horsey sauce. When you eat the ARBY-Q I'll make sperm jokes with the horsey sauce, trying to blow it all over your chin (I would also get a Jamoca shake but that has nothing to do with this little game, just that they are awesome and refreshing)

Your pathetic false superiority keeps me coming back for more, kind of like a meth addict who loves an alcoholic. Both flawed in different ways. The blind leading the deaf.

I would write you poetry with misspellings and grammatical errors on the top of a pizza box. I would not recycle but then complain about the BP oil spill. I don't give a fuck about the whales. I do care about the Hoot Owl, only because in some connected way I think it has to do with the longevity of Hooters, which must be preserved at all costs.

I like that you're a fighter and you say what's on your mind. I'd like to keep this going and see where it goes. I just got promoted from assistant night manager to assistant to the night manager. I think I could maybe afford a two-bedroom if my cousin Stu rents the extra room. I can do this.

Let's ride.

**TinyEvel** · 07-15-2010, 12:16 AM

Look, just because you manscape, do a set of pushups, turn on the light saber replica and then put it on the shelf in the closet you exist in and get your mom to take a pic while you flex and suck, it doesn't mean you are God's gift to women, LJ. God's gift to men, maybe, but get off your high horse and put up the numbers and quit fleecing the media. BTW, is your Twitter ID @premium****ent ?

**luv** · 07-15-2010, 12:17 AM

This thread got enjoyable.

Hammock Parties · 07-15-2010, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TinyEvel

Look, just because you manscape, do a set of pushups, turn on the light saber replica and then put it on the shelf in the closet you exist in and get your mom to take a pic while you flex and suck, it doesn't mean you are God's gift to women, LJ. God's gift to men, maybe, but get off your high horse and put up the numbers and quit fleecing the media. BTW, is your Twitter ID @premium****ent ?

You amuse me.

**TinyEvel** · 07-15-2010, 01:00 AM

That's all I'm doing. Amusing. Bytheway, you owe me a neck rub.

ottawa_chiefs_fan · 07-15-2010, 02:32 AM

This place has jumped the shark.

**Buck** · 07-15-2010, 02:49 AM

It wont be long before I convert all of you to Chargers fans.

**Bwana** · 07-15-2010, 07:01 AM

Alriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighty then.

**Bane** · 07-15-2010, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buck

It wont be long before I convert all of you to Chargers fans.

**Lzen** · 07-15-2010, 07:14 AM

The Chargers can walk into an AIDS tree. Oh....wait.....they cured that.

Die in a fire!

LaChapelle · 07-15-2010, 07:20 AM

Gee, I don't know
He has been arrested more than once for tea bagging Narwhals at Sea World
claims it caused no discomfort

blaise · 07-15-2010, 07:24 AM

Does this have something to do with the old man than had sex with Buck and all his friends at the storage facility?

**Bane** · 07-15-2010, 07:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blaise

Does this have something to do with the old man than had sex with Buck and all his friends at the storage facility?

No.Buck said he came so that doesn't count.

Hydrae · 07-15-2010, 08:59 AM

Rep for the awesomeness that is Jamoca shakes from Arby's!

thecoffeeguy · 07-15-2010, 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TinyEvel

Dear buck, BuckinKeading, Matt, etc...

I love you Buck. You are like the girl I would kiss and then punch and throw in a well. I mean, I would love to cornhole you and then go full Mel Gibson on your ass via cel phone and text message then post pics of you throwing up in your prom dress on FaceBook, then I would call you the next morning and ask if you'd like to go for waffles and try to get a BJ in the car on the way home.

I love you and hate you at the same time. You are hot but also ugly. You have shitty breath and only one good tit, while the other one with the mole on it is still OK but not really pic-worthy. I will exhaust myself trying to take one-tit pics of you.

I put up with you because I like to keep you around so I can tell my friends you take it up the ass, even though you don't. And on occasion you show up looking pretty good but always end up getting too drunk and embarrassing yourself and I have to take you home and hold your hair while you vomit in the pan my dad drains his Chevy oil in out back behind the garage and I have to ask the nosey neighbors to go back inside their house -- that it's nothing -- just a sick friend who got car sick and whose barf just happens to smell like peach schnapps.

I love the way you snort when you laugh and hate the way you snort when you sleep. I want to buy you something from Victoria Secret catalogue but then throw it in the garbage when it arrives because I don't want you knowing that I am that into you. However I will sniff it and whack off to it before I throw it away. Did I say that out loud?

I want to make you a breakup tape and then play it while I fuck you for two minutes and hold you for 58 minutes. I want to take you to Arby's get an ARBY-Q and two packets of Horsey sauce. When you eat the ARBY-Q I'll make sperm jokes with the horsey sauce, trying to blow it all over your chin (I would also get a Jamoca shake but that has nothing to do with this little game, just that they are awesome and refreshing)

Your pathetic false superiority keeps me coming back for more, kind of like a meth addict who loves an alcoholic. Both flawed in different ways. The blind leading the deaf.

I would write you poetry with misspellings and grammatical errors on the top of a pizza box. I would not recycle but then complain about the BP oil spill. I don't give a fuck about the whales. I do care about the Hoot Owl, only because in some connected way I think it has to do with the longevity of Hooters, which must be preserved at all costs.

I like that you're a fighter and you say what's on your mind. I'd like to keep this going and see where it goes. I just got promoted from assistant night manager to assistant to the night manager. I think I could maybe afford a two-bedroom if my cousin Stu rents the extra room. I can do this.

Let's ride.

GoHuge · 07-15-2010, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thecoffeeguy

Love it when people quote the OT on the 3rd page of a thread. If you didn't how would people know what you're talking about??

BTW well done Tiny. You went romantic, to masochist, to lover, then ghey lover, and finished as a combatant. Covered the whole spectrum!!

07-14-2010, 04:35 PM
TinyEvel Just a li'l Evel Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bald. Goatee. Jorts. Casino cash: $5457131	An open letter to Buck Dear buck, BuckinKeading, Matt, etc... I love you Buck. You are like the girl I would kiss and then punch and throw in a well. I mean, I would love to cornhole you and then go full Mel Gibson on your ass via cel phone and text message then post pics of you throwing up in your prom dress on FaceBook, then I would call you the next morning and ask if you'd like to go for waffles and try to get a BJ in the car on the way home. I love you and hate you at the same time. You are hot but also ugly. You have shitty breath and only one good tit, while the other one with the mole on it is still OK but not really pic-worthy. I will exhaust myself trying to take one-tit pics of you. I put up with you because I like to keep you around so I can tell my friends you take it up the ass, even though you don't. And on occasion you show up looking pretty good but always end up getting too drunk and embarrassing yourself and I have to take you home and hold your hair while you vomit in the pan my dad drains his Chevy oil in out back behind the garage and I have to ask the nosey neighbors to go back inside their house -- that it's nothing -- just a sick friend who got car sick and whose barf just happens to smell like peach schnapps. I love the way you snort when you laugh and hate the way you snort when you sleep. I want to buy you something from Victoria Secret catalogue but then throw it in the garbage when it arrives because I don't want you knowing that I am that into you. However I will sniff it and whack off to it before I throw it away. Did I say that out loud? I want to make you a breakup tape and then play it while I fuck you for two minutes and hold you for 58 minutes. I want to take you to Arby's get an ARBY-Q and two packets of Horsey sauce. When you eat the ARBY-Q I'll make sperm jokes with the horsey sauce, trying to blow it all over your chin (I would also get a Jamoca shake but that has nothing to do with this little game, just that they are awesome and refreshing) Your pathetic false superiority keeps me coming back for more, kind of like a meth addict who loves an alcoholic. Both flawed in different ways. The blind leading the deaf. I would write you poetry with misspellings and grammatical errors on the top of a pizza box. I would not recycle but then complain about the BP oil spill. I don't give a fuck about the whales. I do care about the Hoot Owl, only because in some connected way I think it has to do with the longevity of Hooters, which must be preserved at all costs. I like that you're a fighter and you say what's on your mind. I'd like to keep this going and see where it goes. I just got promoted from assistant night manager to assistant to the night manager. I think I could maybe afford a two-bedroom if my cousin Stu rents the extra room. I can do this. Let's ride.
Posts: 11,807

07-15-2010, 12:16 AM	#31
TinyEvel Just a li'l Evel Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bald. Goatee. Jorts. Casino cash: $5457131	Look, just because you manscape, do a set of pushups, turn on the light saber replica and then put it on the shelf in the closet you exist in and get your mom to take a pic while you flex and suck, it doesn't mean you are God's gift to women, LJ. God's gift to men, maybe, but get off your high horse and put up the numbers and quit fleecing the media. BTW, is your Twitter ID @premium****ent ?
Posts: 11,807

07-15-2010, 12:17 AM	#32
luv MY LITTLE #15 Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Springfield, MO Casino cash: $6279600	This thread got enjoyable.
Posts: 63,424

07-15-2010, 01:00 AM	#34
TinyEvel Just a li'l Evel Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bald. Goatee. Jorts. Casino cash: $5457131	That's all I'm doing. Amusing. Bytheway, you owe me a neck rub.
Posts: 11,807

07-15-2010, 02:32 AM	#35
ottawa_chiefs_fan Starter Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Ottawa, Canada Casino cash: $9651312	This place has jumped the shark.
Posts: 950

07-15-2010, 02:49 AM	#36
Buck Take a Chill Pill Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: South Carolina Casino cash: $8329900	It wont be long before I convert all of you to Chargers fans.
Posts: 44,562

07-15-2010, 07:01 AM	#37
Bwana It's Five O'Clock Somewhere Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Billings, Montana Casino cash: $2139593647	Alriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighty then.
Posts: 69,730

07-15-2010, 07:14 AM	#39
Lzen Supporter Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Jan Quadrant Vincent 16 Casino cash: $2270692	The Chargers can walk into an AIDS tree. Oh....wait.....they cured that. Die in a fire! __________________ If at first you don't succeed ...skydiving is not for you.
Posts: 41,314

07-15-2010, 07:20 AM	#40
LaChapelle Banned Join Date: Mar 2009 Casino cash: $10004900	Gee, I don't know He has been arrested more than once for tea bagging Narwhals at Sea World claims it caused no discomfort
Posts: 8,588

07-15-2010, 07:24 AM	#41
blaise In Search of a Life Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Plano, TX Casino cash: $9999900	Does this have something to do with the old man than had sex with Buck and all his friends at the storage facility?
Posts: 22,188

07-15-2010, 08:59 AM	#43
Hydrae Sandbox: Leander Lasercats Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Austin, Tx Casino cash: $2377000	Rep for the awesomeness that is Jamoca shakes from Arby's!
Posts: 14,684