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Old 06-13-2013, 04:45 PM  
rico rico is offline
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I Want to Embarrass One of My Groomsmen at My W-Reception,Would Like Your Suggestions
So I got married in Vegas a few weeks ago. Vegas is one backwards-ass city. Had a lot of fun.

So we are having the wedding reception in a few weeks and I am having my groomsmen choose a song to be played when they enter the room and approach the head table with the bridesmaids. I am sure all of you know are aware of what groomsmen entrance songs at wedding receptions are, so no further description necessary.

To say the least, this has been a frustrating process. Most of them have been putting WAY too much time and effort into it. It has been like "pulling teeth" trying to get them to choose the "perfect song."

One of my groomsmen was so conflicted and inde-freaking-cisive in terms of what song he should choose, that he sent this text to me today, "I have my song narrowed down to a few, but can't decide. Can you just think of something cool for me? I know I can count on you for that. Thanks, rico."

PERFECT

I replied with, "sure thing, man. You can count on me! I will come up with something that I know will fit you." That was a bunch of bullshit. Oh, you bet your ass that I am going to attempt to select the perfect song for him. But it's going to be perfect "funny," not perfect "fitting." And no one (including him obviously), with an exception of the DJ, is going to know what the song is until it is actually played when he enters the building and makes his way to the head table.

This particular groomsman, is a friend of mine from college. We were roommates for a couple years. He is a stereotypical hill-rod who literally spends all day listening to the pop-country FM stations on the radio while he dinks around the house doing random shit. He is kind of big and burly, was a successful wrestler in HS, speaks with a gruff voice (like he's growling) and grew up on a farm. He and I CONSTANTLY razz each other when we hang out. We have done this from the first day we met. Constantly giving each other shit. Constantly making fun of each other...about everything. With that said, I am surprised as hell that he actually trusts me with this task.

He is also an obnoxious, biased, tunnel-visioned Chicago White Sox and Dallas Cowboys fan. Hell, I won't be surprised if he is wearing his dumb, goofy-looking adjustable Chicago White Sox cap during pre-reception pictures and during the entire reception. I rarely see him not wearing that damn hat. He's had it for years too. I don't know if there are any songs out there that would piss a White Sox or Cowboys fan off, but if there is one..let me know!!!

Ok, so if this guy chose his own song, it would probably something that I personally would consider to be stupid as hell. Something like: "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" by Trace Adkins, "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy" by Kenny Chesney or "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" by Big and Rich. However, he made the unwise decision to put his "song of choice" in my hands. And as a result, his entrance at my wedding reception is going to be awesome.

So what y'all got? So far, I am stuck on the song below, but will gladly change it if you guys are able to suggest something better. Think of something CORNY as hell that would embarrass a hill-rod.Thanks in advance!!!

And please. No, "Barbie Girl" song. I've actually witnessed dudes enter a reception with that song because they wanted to be perceived as funny. I don't want this guy to come off as trying to be funny. I want 99% of the people there to think he is gay (NTTAWWT), not funny....because that would razz the hell out of him.
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:31 PM   #31
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Originally Posted by Baby Lee View Post
Sounds like someone is begging to be Rick rolled.
Lol, I don't mean to sound gay or anything, but I think Rick Astley is bad ass!

For real. Loved that song when my mom blared it when I was a kid.

As far as the reception entrance potential...I think it would have been a better option had the "Rick roll" not become so popular. When the crowd hears that, they'll think, "oh haha, Rick-roll" instead of thinking, "hmm I wonder if that guy is gay?"
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:35 PM   #32
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Lol, I don't mean to sound gay or anything, but I think Rick Astley is bad ass!

For real. Loved that song when my mom blared it when I was a kid.

As far as the reception entrance potential...I think it would have been a better option had the "Rick roll" not become so popular. When the crowd hears that, they'll think, "oh haha, Rick-roll" instead of thinking, "hmm I wonder if that guy is gay?"
Sorry, I missed that homosexual suggest was mandatory.

Then I have 8 words for you,

'At first I was afraid, I was petrified.'





If you have the video capabilities, the Icona Pop scene from Girls might do the trick

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Old 06-13-2013, 06:42 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by Baby Lee View Post
Sorry, I missed that homosexual suggest was mandatory.

Then I have 8 words for you,

'At first I was afraid, I was petrified.'





If you have the video capabilities, the Icona Pop scene from Girls might do the trick
NICE suggestion on both, but Icona Pop in particular. Those girls are gonna be at Lolla this year...I will probably watching a different concert, so will miss them, but yeah...I'm familiar with them and think that would be hilarious.
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:43 PM   #34
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CP has awesome gay suggestions. I knew I could count on you guys for that!
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:51 PM   #35
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Sorry, I missed that homosexual suggest was mandatory.
Yes, it is mandatory. And not because I personally have anything against the gay community. I have a gay cousin, gay acquaintances...they've been nothing, but nice to me. So whatever they choose to put their thang in is fine with me as long as they aren't Dahmers and as long as their not trying to put their thang near me...which doesn't seem to be a problem.

However, it is mandatory because my hick-friend is not homophobic...but he's definitely more gay-apprehensive than he should be. He is very ignorant when it comes to gay people. As mentioned, he is narcissistic and literally feels that if a person is gay, that means they automatically crave his buns.

He definitely doesn't want to be affiliated with anything gay...so finding something gay for him to enter to is a necessity...anything to make him cringe from embarrassment.
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:53 PM   #36
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How bout this:
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:55 PM   #37
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NICE suggestion on both, but Icona Pop in particular. Those girls are gonna be at Lolla this year...I will probably watching a different concert, so will miss them, but yeah...I'm familiar with them and think that would be hilarious.
Maybe you could give him a seating placard that instead of his name had '90's bitch' on it.
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:56 PM   #38
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Yes, it is mandatory. And not because I personally have anything against the gay community. I have a gay cousin, gay acquaintances...they've been nothing, but nice to me. So whatever they choose to put their thang in is fine with me as long as they aren't Dahmers and as long as their not trying to put their thang near me...which doesn't seem to be a problem.

However, it is mandatory because my hick-friend is not homophobic...but he's definitely more gay-apprehensive than he should be. He is very ignorant when it comes to gay people. As mentioned, he is narcissistic and literally feels that if a person is gay, that means they automatically crave his buns.

He definitely doesn't want to be affiliated with anything gay...so finding something gay for him to enter to is a necessity...anything to make him cringe from embarrassment.
I wasn't suggesting anything, just explaining that I initially thought you were just going for cheesy and embarrassing, not knowing that the gay part was your central aim.

I would suggest 'Under Pressure' but it's a little to solemn for actual homosexuals to be outright gutbusting funny.




Also, that's why the video is so necessary on Icona Pop, the song is not overtly gay, but Andrew Rennells is as gay as flipflops on Fire Island.
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Old 06-13-2013, 06:59 PM   #39
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Can't get much gayer than this...
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Old 06-13-2013, 07:01 PM   #40
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Can't get much gayer than this...
You have lived a SHELTERED life.

I think you meant 'can't get much more overtly gay.'
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Old 06-13-2013, 07:01 PM   #41
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Holy shit, your a fast reader/typer. Those sound pretty gay. I'll have to check into them.
he's like that when he wears his X-Wing Tee.
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Old 06-13-2013, 07:11 PM   #42
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he's like that when he wears his X-Wing Tee.
Haha, where's the "fyp?"

Edit: Nevermind, I forgot I typed that last part and what it was pertaining to.
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Old 06-13-2013, 07:13 PM   #43
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Can't get much gayer than this...
This would be perfect if there weren't going to be a bunch of Churchy family members in attendance.
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Old 06-13-2013, 07:20 PM   #44
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Old 06-13-2013, 08:37 PM   #45
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Retro - Jimmy Cagney. Yankee Doodle Dandy.
Haha, nice...
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