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Old 01-14-2005, 03:18 PM  
ENDelt260 ENDelt260 is offline
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Funny college stories.

Tell 'em here. Bonus points for police involvement, and/or vomiting in public.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:19 PM   #2
ENDelt260 ENDelt260 is offline
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On second thought... this thread was ill-conceived. My stories are all funnier when I and my audience are drunk.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:20 PM   #3
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Phobia is a bastard. I thought I'd throw that out while I still have the chance
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:21 PM   #4
Cochise Cochise is offline
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My roommate and I got hammered my freshman year and were tearing up our room after coming home from a party. It started with him tearing the place apart in a vain search for some controlled substances he was missing but we were pretty loaded and it ended up in us pelting some passersby out on the lawn with empty cans from our 3rd story window.

Unfortunately those passersby were cops and came up for a visit and took us for a nice ride in their car and a visit to their office being that we were both 18, it was a dry campus, and a few other minor details.

That is a tamer one, anyway
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:21 PM   #5
Mr. Kotter Mr. Kotter is offline
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I'll come back tonight drunk....I got a couple of doosies: good thing the statute of limitations has run out.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:22 PM   #6
Mr. Kotter Mr. Kotter is offline
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Originally Posted by David.
Phobia is a bastard. I thought I'd throw that out while I still have the chance
You're buckin' for a temporary ban/Phobia fugg with you day, eh?
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:22 PM   #7
|Zach| |Zach| is offline
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This is less funny and more so disgusting. But I went to MU to hang out and party with a bunch of my friends. It was a good time and everything was kind of winding down. Alot of people were asleep and I was talking to a buddy of mine on a couch.

While we were talking a girl walked in. She looked really drunk and she was walking around. We were looking at her trying to figure out if she needed some help or not. A few seconds later she pulls her shorts and panties down out of nowhere. We both looked at eachother laughing but then she decideds to squat down and take a crap right there in this carpeted room...she then fell asleep right there.

This poor girl happened to be in a sorority and her name was Whitney. Soon enough the whole greek universe found out and she was dubbed "Shitney" on campus. She ended up transferring...
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:22 PM   #8
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Here's just the punchline:

So I walk out of the store, it's downtown, middle of the day. At the stoplight in his squad car is my friend Tom. So I yell at him as loud as I can:
"HEY PIG....Wanna Buy Some Coke?"

Later that night at the bar I puked in the parking lot.

You'll have to guess the rest.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:23 PM   #9
ENDelt260 ENDelt260 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZachKC
This is less funny and more so disgusting. But I went to MU to hang out and party with a bunch of my friends. It was a good time and everything was kind of winding down. Alot of people were asleep and I was talking to a buddy of mine on a couch.

While we were talking a girl walked in. She looked really drunk and she was walking around. We were looking at her trying to figure out if she needed some help or not. A few seconds later she pulls her shorts and panties down out of nowhere. We both looked at eachother laughing but then she decideds to squat down and take a crap right there in this carpeted room...she then fell asleep right there.

This poor girl happened to be in a sorority and her name was Whitney. Soon enough the whole greek universe found out and she was dubbed "Shitney" on campus. She ended up transferring...
Awesome.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:24 PM   #10
JazzzLovr JazzzLovr is offline
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Originally Posted by SDChiefsfan
I'll come back tonight drunk....
Yeah, because that's turned out so well for ya in the past...
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:24 PM   #11
Bearcat Bearcat is offline
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This one time, I threw up on a cop...
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:24 PM   #12
David. David. is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZachKC
This is less funny and more so disgusting. But I went to MU to hang out and party with a bunch of my friends. It was a good time and everything was kind of winding down. Alot of people were asleep and I was talking to a buddy of mine on a couch.

While we were talking a girl walked in. She looked really drunk and she was walking around. We were looking at her trying to figure out if she needed some help or not. A few seconds later she pulls her shorts and panties down out of nowhere. We both looked at eachother laughing but then she decideds to squat down and take a crap right there in this carpeted room...she then fell asleep right there.

This poor girl happened to be in a sorority and her name was Whitney. Soon enough the whole greek universe found out and she was dubbed "Shitney" on campus. She ended up transferring...
omfg
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:25 PM   #13
Cochise Cochise is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearcat
This one time, I threw up on a cop...
It it was a Maryville cop, good work.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:27 PM   #14
ENDelt260 ENDelt260 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearcat
This one time, I threw up on a cop...
I don't think I ever did that. But, the time I referenced in the other thread... being passed out in a puddle of my own vomit at 9am on campus... I was woken up by a cop.

That was fun.

What's really cool, is you can still find mention of it on the UMR website.

Quote:
03/01/99 at 9:00 a.m.: UMR Police locate unconcious student on main campus. Same had been drinking. A fraternity member was contacted who agreed to take custody of same in lieu of incarceration at Phelps County jail. Report copy sent to Student Affairs for disciplinary action.
http://campus.umr.edu/police/mar99.html

I'm sure I've posted that before. But, I just find it really amusing that the UMRPD stores their blotter online for years.

Some of my other drunken misdeeds are on there as well. I think I've got three or four mentions on there. Of course, none list my name.
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Old 01-14-2005, 03:27 PM   #15
Bearcat Bearcat is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZachKC
This is less funny and more so disgusting. But I went to MU to hang out and party with a bunch of my friends. It was a good time and everything was kind of winding down. Alot of people were asleep and I was talking to a buddy of mine on a couch.

While we were talking a girl walked in. She looked really drunk and she was walking around. We were looking at her trying to figure out if she needed some help or not. A few seconds later she pulls her shorts and panties down out of nowhere. We both looked at eachother laughing but then she decideds to squat down and take a crap right there in this carpeted room...she then fell asleep right there.

This poor girl happened to be in a sorority and her name was Whitney. Soon enough the whole greek universe found out and she was dubbed "Shitney" on campus. She ended up transferring...

Huh... I knew a Whitney at NW that had transferred from somewhere.... maybe this is why she didn't say where she transferred from.... "Oh, Shitney!"
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