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Old 11-25-2011, 05:40 PM  
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Sixteen years of human-squirrel diplomacy ... gone in an instant.

I was in the kitchen today, and saw a squirrel out in our plum tree.

For some reason the squirrels like to gnaw on the plum tree's bark, and my wife asked if the squirrel was gnawing. I wasn't sure, but I was eating crackers and decided to throw one out there so the squirrel would have something else to gnaw.

So I open the door and wing out a cracker. Now, the plum tree is about 25 feet from our back door, so you really have to put some arm into a cracker to have any hope of it making a distance near the tree. I was aided by the fact that it was one of those denser round crackers as opposed to a saltine or club cracker, so I went sidearm and winged it like frisbee.

This thing catches the wind, arcs out and then peels back toward the tree. The plum tree is one of those trees that has a lot of dense branches and twigs and stuff, and this thing stays airborne, zips through the branches ... and nails the squirrel right in the shoulder blade. He never knew what hit him.

What are the odds of that? I try to be a good squirrel neighbor, and then I go and nail one with a cracker from 25 feet away. No one's ever going to believe it was an accident, and now I'm going to be having nuts dropped on me every time I go outside.
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Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 05:44 PM   #2
shirtsleeve shirtsleeve is offline
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Where is Eddie? He usually eats these goddam things.
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shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.shirtsleeve has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.
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Old 11-25-2011, 05:45 PM   #3
Reerun_KC Reerun_KC is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shirtsleeve View Post
Where is Eddie? He usually eats these goddam things.
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Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Reerun_KC has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 11-25-2011, 05:46 PM   #4
LiveSteam LiveSteam is offline
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LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 05:49 PM   #5
BigMeatballDave BigMeatballDave is online now
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Old 11-25-2011, 05:52 PM   #6
Bowser Bowser is offline
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Originally Posted by shirtsleeve View Post
Where is Eddie? He usually eats these goddam things.
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Rainman > Cassel
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Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.Bowser is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 06:01 PM   #7
aturnis aturnis is offline
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I was once at my dad's trimming out his house, when I saw a mouse scampering about. I didn't know exactly what to do, but grabbed a piece of scrap wood, pulled back, and let 'er fly. To my amazement, I didn't just hit the mouse, but severed his head 80% of the way from his body. He didn't get back up...
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aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.aturnis Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
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Old 11-25-2011, 06:06 PM   #8
bevischief bevischief is offline
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You did better than Casshole would have done...
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bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 06:08 PM   #9
GloryDayz GloryDayz is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post
I was in the kitchen today, and saw a squirrel out in our plum tree.

For some reason the squirrels like to gnaw on the plum tree's bark, and my wife asked if the squirrel was gnawing. I wasn't sure, but I was eating crackers and decided to throw one out there so the squirrel would have something else to gnaw.

So I open the door and wing out a cracker. Now, the plum tree is about 25 feet from our back door, so you really have to put some arm into a cracker to have any hope of it making a distance near the tree. I was aided by the fact that it was one of those denser round crackers as opposed to a saltine or club cracker, so I went sidearm and winged it like frisbee.

This thing catches the wind, arcs out and then peels back toward the tree. The plum tree is one of those trees that has a lot of dense branches and twigs and stuff, and this thing stays airborne, zips through the branches ... and nails the squirrel right in the shoulder blade. He never knew what hit him.

What are the odds of that? I try to be a good squirrel neighbor, and then I go and nail one with a cracker from 25 feet away. No one's ever going to believe it was an accident, and now I'm going to be having nuts dropped on me every time I go outside.
So you're this guy!!!

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GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 06:17 PM   #10
cabletech94 cabletech94 is offline
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squirrels are good for nothing but eating cable.

booooooooooooo squirrels, booooooooooooooo.
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cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.cabletech94 is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 06:33 PM   #11
listopencil listopencil is offline
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Silently, in the distance, a squirrel army is gathering. Preparing to wreak unholy vengeance upon the Rainman household. Be afraid. No one will be spared.
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listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 06:34 PM   #12
Flachief58 Flachief58 is offline
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Originally Posted by cabletech94 View Post
squirrels are good for nothing but eating cable.

booooooooooooo squirrels, booooooooooooooo.
You should eat em back. That'll show em!
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Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.Flachief58 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.
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Old 11-25-2011, 07:10 PM   #13
whoman69 whoman69 is offline
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Old 11-25-2011, 07:12 PM   #14
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-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.-King- is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 11-25-2011, 07:15 PM   #15
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If he's in a squirrel gang I expect you'll find your tires are slashed in the morning.
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tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.tk13 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.
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