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Old 01-08-2013, 12:57 AM  
'Hamas' Jenkins 'Hamas' Jenkins is offline
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Welp, I've returned.

Welcome, 'Hamas' Jenkins.
You last visited: 01-08-2012 at 07:08 PM

Hi all. I’m sure that a lot of you missed me and more of you didn’t. To some, this post will be like a herpes outbreak. To others it may be something more pleasant, like scabies. I’m going to break my return into two separate threads. One is a football reflection thread; the other will be life updates that I know some of you would like info on.

My takes on 2012:

***** has finally been mother****ed. Thank you Clark. That sump pump of Patriot Way shit was half Millen, half Mussolini.

What a gloriously inept ****bath. My hope is that looking back in several years we will consider ourselves extremely lucky for the shitstorm ***** was awful enough to create for us. I think you could make a fair case that ***** did one of the five worst jobs in NFL history. Staggering that the man was handed four future Pro Bowlers who were under 24 years old when he got here, had the #3 and #34 picks and, over the course of four drafts, with tens of millions in cap room, added only Justin Houston, Eric Berry, and a swath of middling to replacement-level starters. It’s rare that you see such a thorough refutation of a professional philosophy. *****’s resume as a talent evaluator is as barren as his hairline.

However, we were by no means the least talented team in the league. This year was an aberration due to extremely poor coaching and bad (actually good) luck. I think that people often overlook the effect of small sample sizes in football. Matt Cassel’s 2010 is a great example. He threw a ton of passes that should have been intercepted. Luckily , for his worthless ass, they weren’t. Luck swung the other way this year (thanks, Dex!!), and although it was rarely the difference in any one game, I think those breaks contributed to the psychological defeatism that helped crush the team’s spirit. The fumbles that bounced our way and the picks that weren’t caught in 2010 caught up to the team in 2012. The 2011 Chiefs were also preposterously lucky on a game –to-game basis, even if they were quite unlucky from an injury perspective (their Pythag. W-L was 4-12 in 2011 despite an actual record of 7-9). Although it would have been nice to be incredibly unlucky in 2012, picking #1 this year is far better than picking #6 this year and then hanging out in the no-man’s land of 5-11-8-8.

Aside from the tenure of the worst GM in franchise history, things are looking up, and not only because the Chiefs are trading as a penny stock.
Andy Reid is a very good coach. He’s not a great coach, but he’s good enough. What worries me is the propensity of fans to always make a fallacious appeal to authority. It happened with ***** and the Executive of the Decade/You’re not a GM line of refutation, and while lurking I saw similar sentiments about Reid and quarterbacks. That’s where I think we’ll get into trouble. Reid is a much better coach than he is a talent evaluator. Just because he got the most out of McNabb, Vick, or Kolb doesn’t mean that he will automatically pick the best QB. The key is to get the most talented guy and get the most out of him, not blindly trust the GM or coach because they are the GM or coach. Jerry Reese has made terrible picks, Bill Belichick has made boneheaded decisions on the sideline and they are tremendous at their jobs. Football lifers aren’t sacrosanct. Far too many people carried water for Herm, Haley, and ***** in spite of their better judgment because of who they were believed to be. I’m not some oracle because I soured on *****; I just happened to be right in that instance. Conversely, I was way off on Vernon Gholston, Jimmy Clausen, and (*tear*) most likely, Blaine Gabbert. This site functions best when we can have lively discussion based upon posting and support of relevant claims. It’s at its worst when it’s a hive mind blindly following an imperative because someone else told them to.

I hope tonight killed any remaining holdouts of the “Draft Te’o” camp. Geno Smith is, IMO, the only sensible option. It doesn’t mean that he’s risk free, almost no one is (look at RGIII, even). If Geno is worth taking at 12 he’s worth taking at 1. We had the worst record in the league; we have 29 wins since 2006. Even if Geno is a coinflip to be a franchise QB, and he may only be that, that’s a risk worth taking. Honestly, it’s a risk worth taking if he’s only a 1:4 chance.

I don’t really care if we switch to the 4-3, because I think Houston can play the Von Miller role in such a defense, thus obviating the issue of having two undersized DEs.

Offseason Priorities should be:
1) Re-sign Albert. Stephenson looked nice at first then degraded to piss awful.

2)
Re-sign Bowe. He is our passing offense

3)
Avoid overpaying for secondary help. Secondary players rarely provide surplus value in their second contracts. A reclamation project may be worth looking into, but signing DRC would scare me.

4)
Find a slot receiver who we’ll actually play who can actually play. Wylie and McCluster are fodder. Breaston probably wants out and I can’t blame him. Baldwin is the epitome of Scott *****. “Tom [Dimitroff], I wouldn’t trade up for Julio Jones, [Baldwin] is just as good as him.”

5)
Draw and quarter Winston at the draft party. I don’t care if we sign the guy who injects Winstrol into Jordan Black’s ass. I hate him.
Draft Priorities:

Aside from QB at #1, I think we can find solid secondary and WR depth in rounds 2-4. That said, there are a ton of potential players that we shouldn’t pass up merely because we hope that a certain player could get it.

Ultimately, the title of this post says it all. It’s nice to be back.

God-**** Tebow and Draft Geno.
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Old 01-08-2013, 08:56 AM   #106
Dicky McElephant Dicky McElephant is offline
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:05 AM   #107
Der Flöprer Der Flöprer is offline
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:06 AM   #108
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Never heard of it...
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:07 AM   #109
Strongside Strongside is offline
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Member since just after you left, but longtime lurker. Welcome back. Always enjoyed your takes.
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:08 AM   #110
crazycoffey crazycoffey is offline
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Member since just after you left, but longtime lurker. Welcome back. Always enjoyed your takes.

Thank you
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:10 AM   #111
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:14 AM   #112
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:16 AM   #113
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:16 AM   #114
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Not that I should be calling anyone a noob, but you should definitely watch the video in that thread.
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:19 AM   #115
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Welcome back Hamas and Mecca - gone for way to long.
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:19 AM   #116
crazycoffey crazycoffey is offline
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Not that I should be calling anyone a noob, but you should definitely watch the video in that thread.
I was just foolin' about
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:20 AM   #117
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Great post.

Glad Hamas is back.
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:24 AM   #118
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:24 AM   #119
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Old 01-08-2013, 09:31 AM   #120
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