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Old 05-20-2013, 04:00 PM  
Pasta Giant Meatball Pasta Giant Meatball is offline
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The list of 85 by Roastmaster Saul Good. And hey, it's actually saul good.

As a spinoff to the successful NFL Network's version of this and from the drama thread, it has come to fruition that this thread must be created.

Each day Hootie will reveal a member starting with 101 and working his way in order to number 1. I will update the OP as I see the names revealed.

*Warning this thread may cause a severe case of butthurt*

Let it begin!!

Hootie's List

Saul Good - A little about Roaster #2 (by frazod)
Spoiler!

85 BigRedChief
Spoiler!


84. StevieRay
Spoiler!


83. Rustshack
Spoiler!


82. KCnative
Spoiler!


81. Notorious
Spoiler!


80. Braincase
Spoiler!


79. big nasty kcnut
Spoiler!


78. crazycoffey
Spoiler!



77. Phobia

Spoiler!


76 Dave Lane

Spoiler!


75 KnowMo roasted by PGM
Spoiler!


74 Luv roasted by Mr. Flopnuts
Spoiler!

Last edited by Der Flöprer; 06-25-2013 at 08:16 PM..
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:31 PM   #7021
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Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Sweet Daddy Hate < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.
 
Old 06-13-2013, 10:33 PM   #7022
Count Alex's Losses Count Alex's Losses is offline
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Heh. Funny. Not great, just OK. I don't like music jokes.
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:34 PM   #7023
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Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls View Post
Heh. Funny. Not great, just OK. I don't like music jokes.
I was somewhat confused by Bad Company being attributed to "Juke Box Hero", but oh well.
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:41 PM   #7024
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saul Good View Post
83. Rustshack

You probably don't recognize the name, but the next time you read a random post about how ****ing great Iowa State is...think back to this thread...this is who I'm talking about. His posts are like when Bad Company is the band playing the local free concert in the park. At first, you're like "who the **** is Bad Company?" Then, when the first song starts, you're going "I didn't know they played this song". Then, an entire hour passes where you know all the words to the songs that you didn't realize were by Bad Company. You probably thought it was Foriegner your whole life, but it wasn't. Its totally understandable that someone could think Jukebox Hero was Foriegner. It does kind of sound like them, but its Bad Company. Look it up if you dont believe me. Anyway, they aren't good songs. They suck shit, actually. Still, when the concert ends, you're all "all those shitty songs...they were Bad Company all along...I never knew". All those shitty posts...you'll recognize them when you see them...that's Rustshack.

So Rustshack is just your skinny, geeky kid right out of central casting. He got the zits and the glasses, and the floodwater pants and the whole bit. He tries to go goth and be all dark and mad at the world, but he just looks like a pasty queer. He's dressed up as a vampire every Halloween since he was an eighth grader in 1999. Then, when vampire movies got popular, he got pissed off because everyone else dressed up like vampires for Halloween looked cooler than him. Seriously, Rusty...you were trying for Edward from Twilight, but people were getting Count Chocula from Kellogg's. So he would cry like a bitch, and the other kids would make fun of him. He thought about hanging himself but decided against it because vampires can't die from that. So he went to one of the other vampire/goth kids the next day for advice, they told him that he had to think of something even worse, so he went to Iowa State. (Look, not all of these jokes are going to be gems.)

So, anyway, **** you, Rustshack. Iowa State sucks. Steele Jantz sucks. Paul Rhodes sucks. Frazod is fat. Larry Eustachy is awesome for sucking down cool ones from cans with pull-tabs with hot skanks at Mizzou. You suck.

Pros: Isn't a KU fan. Isn't bothered by the fact that Top Gun was laced with latent homosexuality...he appreciates it for what it was...a pretty kickass movie that doesn't need me to defend it from YOU.

Cons: If he did hang himself, he could easily be mistaken for a flaccid penis dangling from a string if the person who was looking at him was kind of far away...or was close by but wasn't wearing their necessary prescription glasses or something. Probably knows enough about computers to track me down in real life if he took this the wrong way and decided to smear goat's blood on my door (or whatever the **** renaissance festivaly people do whenever they want to convey disapproval).

Outlook for Rustshack in 2014: Everyone will forget who he is again. Years from now, people will still talk about the time Dave got a DUI on the way home from that Foreigner concert.

Outlook for the Cylcones in 2014: Somewhere in the 5-7 to 7-5 range. Just like they are every year.
Lol, this was a good one. Glad Rustshack was acknowledged/roasted. You explained it perfectly in your first line. I am just glad someone besides me has noticed him....no one ever seems to acknowledge him. Haha, I like him, he's good shit.

He always sticks out to me for a few reasons. Of course, the Iowa State thing...The Cyclones are cool, I've liked some of their wrestlers they've produced. When Iowa State and Iowa play in football, I'm apathetic (ND fan)...In fact, sometimes I catch myself leaning towards Iowa State because I like their colors more than the Hawks...they resemble the Chiefs, slightly.

Every time I notice him on here, I think about that Steele Jantz thread he created. Haha, good ol' Steel Jantz. I won't lie, that dude was MONEY vs. Iowa a couple years ago. He basically carried the Cyclones over the Hawks in OT in that game. That thread cracked me up though.

He also sticks out to me because of his signature on here. The "Follow This Guy On Twitter."

To be honest, (and I know I will be alone here) this roast is my favorite out of all of them so far. Including the Hootie ones. Call me crazy, but this roast hit the spot for me. Lol, well done.
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:47 PM   #7025
Count Alex's Losses Count Alex's Losses is offline
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Mostly it's just hard to roast a boring ****ing poster like RustShack. He should be honored he's even being considered worthy of a roast.
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:51 PM   #7026
J Diddy J Diddy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls View Post
Mostly it's just hard to roast a boring ****ing poster like RustShack. He should be honored he's even being considered worthy of a roast.
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:51 PM   #7027
Saul Good Saul Good is offline
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Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls View Post
Mostly it's just hard to roast a boring ****ing poster like RustShack. He should be honored he's even being considered worthy of a roast.
I just realized the direction I'm going in your roast that I will never get to because these will be worn out long before then. It will blow your ****ing mind, and nobody will see the plot twist coming.
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Colon is 0.7 WAR or 5M in value. He makes 500k. Getting pretty close, and since he's producing war each of the next 4 years of club control, he's fair value for Upton straight up. More than fair actually.
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Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.
 
Old 06-13-2013, 10:51 PM   #7028
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Saul Good is killing it. Keep it up.
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I'm just a little pussy from Iowa
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Old 06-13-2013, 11:04 PM   #7029
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Originally Posted by rico View Post
Lol, this was a good one. Glad Rustshack was acknowledged/roasted. You explained it perfectly in your first line. I am just glad someone besides me has noticed him....no one ever seems to acknowledge him. Haha, I like him, he's good shit.

He always sticks out to me for a few reasons. Of course, the Iowa State thing...The Cyclones are cool, I've liked some of their wrestlers they've produced. When Iowa State and Iowa play in football, I'm apathetic (ND fan)...In fact, sometimes I catch myself leaning towards Iowa State because I like their colors more than the Hawks...they resemble the Chiefs, slightly.

Every time I notice him on here, I think about that Steele Jantz thread he created. Haha, good ol' Steel Jantz. I won't lie, that dude was MONEY vs. Iowa a couple years ago. He basically carried the Cyclones over the Hawks in OT in that game. That thread cracked me up though.

He also sticks out to me because of his signature on here. The "Follow This Guy On Twitter."

To be honest, (and I know I will be alone here) this roast is my favorite out of all of them so far. Including the Hootie ones. Call me crazy, but this roast hit the spot for me. Lol, well done.
Thank you. When you're drunk, high, and blessed with a larger than average sized penis, writing roasts is easy.


(Truth be told, I'm only two of those things.)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Prison Bitch View Post
Colon is 0.7 WAR or 5M in value. He makes 500k. Getting pretty close, and since he's producing war each of the next 4 years of club control, he's fair value for Upton straight up. More than fair actually.
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Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.Saul Good is obviously part of the inner Circle.
 
Old 06-13-2013, 11:07 PM   #7030
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Saul Good View Post
Thank you. When you're drunk, high, and blessed with a larger than average sized penis, writing roasts is easy.


(Truth be told, I'm only two of those things.)
Just keep writing while you're drunk and high. HYUK HYUK
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Old 06-13-2013, 11:11 PM   #7031
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Originally Posted by Saul Good View Post
84. StevieRay

Stevie is a devout Christian. He briefly flirted with the idea of becoming a priest because he wanted a job that encouraged being a sexual predator, but he couldn't figure out how to show off his chest hair while wearing the clerical collar. Eventually, he decided to become an Elvis impersonator so that he could have the best of both worlds.

Easily the most passive-aggressive member of our fine community, Stevie loves to take cheap shots at other posters under the guise of being concerned about their emotional and spiritual well-being. He's elevated it to an art-form. This is the closest he will ever get to being an actual artist despite the fact that he fancies himself a painter. Maybe I'm a philistine, but any asshole with a can of spray paint and a bad attitude can produce the kind of "art" Stevie shits out. I've paid $3 for landscapes on cardboard in Tijuana that were better than the portraits of black people Stevie adds to the side of charter schools. Maybe if he had thought of doing portraits of Andre the Giant and writing "obey", he could have become the modern day Andy Warhol. Instead, he's Bazooka Joe without the punchlines.

His claim to fame is that he's a Chiefs superfan. Not just anyone can do that, you know...you have to have a costume...or at least some red face paint and Chiefs bed sheets to wear as a cape or something. Okay. Anyone can do that, but it's still pretty sweet. They get their own locker room at Arrowhead and everything. I mean, it's not technically a locker room per se, but he and X-factor do change in the same port-a-potty in the parking lot before games. (I guess I was right the first time. You have to be able to fit inside a port-a-potty to be a superfan, so not just anyone can do it...sorry, Fraz.)



Pros: I like the way the word "pompadour" sounds. Now that the new Liberace movie has come out, his Elvis costumes actually seem relevant. Does that sweet "stick your arm out straight and wiggle your hand" thing really well.

Cons: Looks inside his kleenex after blowing his nose. (What the **** are you hoping to find?) Mixes his "Jesus Juice" too stiff. Remember, Stevie, putting it in a Pepsi can isn't enough. If the first one has too much booze, the kids are going to get wise to your plot. Fast-forwards "Passion of the Christ" to the scenes where Jim Caviezel has his shirt off.

Outlook for 2014: Let's say higher. No way does this year's list even get finished, so who gives a **** about next year, anyway?
Nice ending.
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Old 06-13-2013, 11:13 PM   #7032
Count Alex's Losses Count Alex's Losses is offline
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And a mighty big bag I am.
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Old 06-13-2013, 11:14 PM   #7033
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Okay I need help with the superfans. I recognize the x factor and of course stevieray, but who else is in that picture?
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Old 06-13-2013, 11:21 PM   #7034
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Old 06-13-2013, 11:36 PM   #7035
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls View Post
Mostly it's just hard to roast a boring ****ing poster like RustShack. He should be honored he's even being considered worthy of a roast.
And he WILL BE honored. That's what makes it even funnier to me. Haha, I know he's been frequenting this thread. Just yesterday he stopped by and said something like, "so can someone please do the top 10?" or something. I got the vibe that he has just been ITCHING to be acknowledge, mentioned and/or roasted in this thread.

Haha, I like RustShack, he's funny to me. He's good shit, IMO.
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