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Old 07-30-2013, 01:04 PM  
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is online now
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Paralyzed Man Wakes to Find His Dog Bit Off His Testicle



Fluffy white dogs are a menace & should be eradicated (or, if you're feeling humane, universally sterilized). Finally my innate prejudice against them is justified.

Quote:
An Arkansas man paralyzed from the waist down told police he awoke Monday morning to a "burning pain," only to find his dog chewing on a ball. His ball, that is.

According to the official police report, the 39-year-old Trumann resident regularly sleeps in the raw, and was fully nude when he woke up yesterday around 7:45 AM to discover his dog "had eaten one of his testicles."

The unidentified owner had rescued the "small, white, fluffy" stray just three weeks ago, and had yet to take it in for a checkup.

Sadly, the dog's first visit to a vet was to be euthanized.

The Arkansas Department of Health will test the dog's remains for rabies.

Meanwhile, adding insult to injury, the man was transported to St. Bernards Regional Medical Center to be treated.
http://gawker.com/paralyzed-man-wake...ticl-963044875
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Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Cave Johnson is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:46 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pestilence View Post
If he's paralyzed from the waist down....how did he feel a burning pain?
That part had me curious, too.
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:50 PM   #17
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Why did I click on this thread. WHYWHYWHY
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:51 PM   #18
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:54 PM   #19
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Why did I click on this thread. WHYWHYWHY
You're not having a ball?
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:55 PM   #20
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:56 PM   #21
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:57 PM   #22
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I wonder if he's off to the rodeo?
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:58 PM   #23
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:59 PM   #24
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Had it put down, thats sad, i'm sure he loved the little squirt.

No more Gravy Train for that pooch.
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Old 07-30-2013, 01:59 PM   #25
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Old 07-30-2013, 02:10 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gonzo View Post
I wonder if he's off to the rodeo?
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Old 07-30-2013, 02:11 PM   #27
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Old 07-30-2013, 02:16 PM   #28
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Old 07-30-2013, 02:20 PM   #29
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Old 07-30-2013, 02:21 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Donger View Post
Obviously the dog was just playing fetch.
You can't spend all day yelling, "Get the ball, boy! Get the ball!" and not expect a little confusion come nightfall.
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