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Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Count Zarth Count Zarth is online now
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I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
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Old 05-19-2014, 11:58 AM   #16
PackerinMo PackerinMo is offline
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You should have a big order of nachos with the works, jalapenos,sour cream etc., you will be shitting your ass out.
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Old 05-19-2014, 11:58 AM   #17
srvy srvy is offline
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There is an enema in someones future.
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srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.srvy has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.
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Old 05-19-2014, 11:58 AM   #18
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taco bell
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:00 PM   #19
PackerinMo PackerinMo is offline
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How many days can you go without shitting before you die? This thread got me curious.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:02 PM   #20
tooge tooge is online now
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You should be effaced. You should start dilating soon. Push hard, but not too hard, and breath alot. You will be fine.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:02 PM   #21
Count Zarth Count Zarth is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PackerinMo View Post
How many days can you go without shitting before you die?
I don't know but I passed on Waldo Pizza the other night because I was afraid of getting too backed up.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:04 PM   #22
Dayze Dayze is online now
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I routinely go 2-3 days without making a deposit.
I'm sure I'm broken. lol
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:05 PM   #23
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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That's not going to get him into a Boardwalk Empire situation, is it?

You know, the scene where the kid spikes the other kids drink with this stuff, then the kid shits blood and dies?
Good God no.

It's a saline laxative. All it does is draw water into the bowel. If you drank more than the recommended dosage it can cause other issues but perforation of the intestine certainly isn't one of them.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:05 PM   #24
King_Chief_Fan King_Chief_Fan is offline
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clogged drain?...........
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:06 PM   #25
Dayze Dayze is online now
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:06 PM   #26
PackerinMo PackerinMo is offline
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We now have a shit thread next to the Ham thread, ugh.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:07 PM   #27
ptlyon ptlyon is online now
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Two words: obstructed bowel

That's serious shit
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:08 PM   #28
Dayze Dayze is online now
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enema time. my newphew years back was stopped up for like 4-5 days for whatever reason, and he had to get 'cleaned out'.
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:09 PM   #29
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
Two words: obstructed bowel

That's serious shit
Highly unlikely.

If he had an obstruction, he'd likely be vomiting.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:09 PM   #30
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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enema time. my newphew years back was stopped up for like 4-5 days for whatever reason, and he had to get 'cleaned out'.
Saline laxative works just as well as is far less "intrusive".
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