Home Mail MemberMap Chat (0) Wallpapers
Go Back   ChiefsPlanet > Hall of Classics

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Stop, Chiefs Stop, Chiefs is offline
it hurts
 
Stop, Chiefs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Casino cash: $69005
I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
Posts: 177,044
Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 11:58 AM   #16
PackerinMo PackerinMo is offline
Knights of Columbus that hurt!
 
PackerinMo's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Somewhere in 'Merica
Casino cash: $17697
You should have a big order of nachos with the works, jalapenos,sour cream etc., you will be shitting your ass out.
__________________
Posts: 7,874
PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 11:58 AM   #17
srvy srvy is online now
Supporter
 
srvy's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: KC
Casino cash: $25553
There is an enema in someones future.
Posts: 3,756
srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.srvy Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 11:58 AM   #18
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Dayze's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Overland Park
Casino cash: $25576
taco bell
__________________
Life is 99% inspiration, 1% Perspiration, and 1% Attention to Detial.
Posts: 27,907
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:00 PM   #19
PackerinMo PackerinMo is offline
Knights of Columbus that hurt!
 
PackerinMo's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Somewhere in 'Merica
Casino cash: $17697
How many days can you go without shitting before you die? This thread got me curious.
__________________
Posts: 7,874
PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:02 PM   #20
tooge tooge is offline
MVP
 
tooge's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Liberty, MO
Casino cash: $12623
You should be effaced. You should start dilating soon. Push hard, but not too hard, and breath alot. You will be fine.
Posts: 8,862
tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.tooge has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:02 PM   #21
Stop, Chiefs Stop, Chiefs is offline
it hurts
 
Stop, Chiefs's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2002
Casino cash: $69005
Quote:
Originally Posted by PackerinMo View Post
How many days can you go without shitting before you die?
I don't know but I passed on Waldo Pizza the other night because I was afraid of getting too backed up.
Posts: 177,044
Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.Stop, Chiefs is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:04 PM   #22
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Dayze's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Overland Park
Casino cash: $25576
I routinely go 2-3 days without making a deposit.
I'm sure I'm broken. lol
__________________
Life is 99% inspiration, 1% Perspiration, and 1% Attention to Detial.
Posts: 27,907
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:05 PM   #23
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
What? What?
 
htismaqe's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Casino cash: $8859
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante84 View Post
That's not going to get him into a Boardwalk Empire situation, is it?

You know, the scene where the kid spikes the other kids drink with this stuff, then the kid shits blood and dies?
Good God no.

It's a saline laxative. All it does is draw water into the bowel. If you drank more than the recommended dosage it can cause other issues but perforation of the intestine certainly isn't one of them.
Posts: 61,900
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:05 PM   #24
King_Chief_Fan King_Chief_Fan is offline
Praise Him
 
King_Chief_Fan's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: none ya
Casino cash: $12727
clogged drain?...........
Attached Images
File Type: jpg draino.jpg (3.5 KB, 363 views)
__________________
Ephesians 2:8-10

English Standard Version (ESV)

8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
Posts: 8,567
King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.King_Chief_Fan Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:06 PM   #25
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Dayze's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Overland Park
Casino cash: $25576
__________________
Life is 99% inspiration, 1% Perspiration, and 1% Attention to Detial.
Posts: 27,907
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:06 PM   #26
PackerinMo PackerinMo is offline
Knights of Columbus that hurt!
 
PackerinMo's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Somewhere in 'Merica
Casino cash: $17697
We now have a shit thread next to the Ham thread, ugh.
__________________
Posts: 7,874
PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.PackerinMo is too fat/Omaha.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:07 PM   #27
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
Bono & Grbac wasn't enough
 

Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Sioux City, IA
Casino cash: $10020149
Two words: obstructed bowel

That's serious shit
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Advertise here: $19.99 a month
Posts: 11,350
ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.ptlyon 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:08 PM   #28
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Dayze's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Overland Park
Casino cash: $25576
enema time. my newphew years back was stopped up for like 4-5 days for whatever reason, and he had to get 'cleaned out'.
__________________
Life is 99% inspiration, 1% Perspiration, and 1% Attention to Detial.
Posts: 27,907
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:09 PM   #29
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
What? What?
 
htismaqe's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Casino cash: $8859
Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
Two words: obstructed bowel

That's serious shit
Highly unlikely.

If he had an obstruction, he'd likely be vomiting.
Posts: 61,900
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-19-2014, 12:09 PM   #30
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
What? What?
 
htismaqe's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Casino cash: $8859
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dayze View Post
enema time. my newphew years back was stopped up for like 4-5 days for whatever reason, and he had to get 'cleaned out'.
Saline laxative works just as well as is far less "intrusive".
Posts: 61,900
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:39 AM.


This is a test for a client's site.
A new website that shows member-created construction site listings that need fill or have excess fill. Dirt Monkey @ https://DirtMonkey.net
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.