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Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Count Zarth Count Zarth is offline
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I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
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Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.Count Zarth is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:22 PM   #46
booger booger is offline
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:26 PM   #47
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Enough cheap whiskey should knock that hamster out
Armageddon!!!! Armageddon!!!!

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Old 05-19-2014, 12:29 PM   #48
hometeam hometeam is offline
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Farting is prelude to shit. It will happen my son.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:34 PM   #49
Dayze Dayze is offline
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:34 PM   #50
booger booger is offline
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Armageddon!!!! Armageddon!!!!

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Old 05-19-2014, 12:36 PM   #51
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:37 PM   #52
Dayze Dayze is offline
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maybe you shouldn't invite him over.
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:38 PM   #53
ChiliConCarnage ChiliConCarnage is offline
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ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.ChiliConCarnage Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:39 PM   #54
Reerun_KC Reerun_KC is offline
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:40 PM   #55
Dayze Dayze is offline
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I can eat at Taco Bell, and I feel like someone in a movie who needs to dismantle a bomb with the clock ticking down.
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:41 PM   #56
eDave eDave is offline
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I wonder if your system will back up, and you'll shit out your mouth?
He does that all the time.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:43 PM   #57
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:44 PM   #58
Dayze Dayze is offline
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if a muscular dude rings your doorbell asking if you want him to clean your pipes....say no. Lessoned learned on my part
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Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 12:45 PM   #59
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
What? What?
 
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if a muscular dude rings your doorbell asking if you want him to clean your pipes....say no. Lessoned learned on my part
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Old 05-19-2014, 01:03 PM   #60
Dartgod Dartgod is offline
Wasted away again...
 
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I wonder if your system will back up, and you'll shit out your mouth?
Too late.
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Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dartgod is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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