***Official I am Old Thread***
 

I don’t have any teenagers, and spend roughly zero time around teenagers. There are teenagers in my family, but they are 7 hours away and I’ve watched them grow up on Facebook and via text message.

Podunk, MO where I grew up and my family lives held prom this past weekend, and I am puzzled by the men’s fashion.

Go rent a tuxedo, and have the slacks hemmed 3 inches above your shoe, wear white socks and athletic footwear. WTF?

And it’s all of them, not just my goofy great nephew who somehow landed a smoke show as his date. I feel like a pervert, but I could only dream of someone that looked like her in high school.

Does Roger Goodell copy teen fashion, or does teen fashion copy Roger Goodell?

We wore sneakers to homecoming in 2002 with a tux or suit lol. Don't remember white socks. But the normal tux and shit to prom.

I have no idea, but here’s a preemptive response to pics or it didn’t happen.

He must be filthy rich.

That son of a bitch LMAO

There's only one way that pic makes sense. Your nephew is dealing monster dong.

Well at least he isn't a broccoli head.

last time I did jury duty I dress somewhat business casual for that and probably close to half of the other people there for jury duty (there were at least 100 people) were wearing sweatpants and t shirts or hoodies. I didn't think that much of it but I noticed it.

That’s what I love about these high school girls…

I have a Dr appt tomorrow for a very painful left thumb, a very painful right elbow, and a left hip pain that won't go away... and I have absolutely no idea how it got to this point, there have been no big accidents or falls

When you just wake up outta the blue with persistent pain, thats when you know you're getting old

Is your balls hair gray Dole?

You keep getting older and they keep staying the same age?

He’s a farm kid. If he plays sports, I’m unaware of it. He’ was kind of my favorite when they were little and I was around more because he was goofy and hyperactive and had cartoon ears.

LMAO

I can't believe you just started this thread. I have been cursing under my breath all afternoon as the hotel I am at in Anaheim CA near Disneyland is all families with little kids running up and down the halls screaming and yelling non stop. ROFL

I had jury duty about 7 years ago and it specified coat and tie.

High school guys these days have it made no game needed just slay stunners. Used to have to fight compete or do something outlandishly stupid to land those unicorns early 90s.

Did you sniff your nephews fingers or her chair after she got up?

What do her toes look like?

Your nephew got a Chris Jones in his pants?

Has been since I was in my 20s, as was my chest hair and a lot of the hair on my head.

They didn’t even exist when I graduated in 1981.

Agreed. She would have stuck out like a sore dick in my graduating class now they're everywhere.

ya they don't do that here lol

I rooted for you during the 1996 elections in Atlanta.

He’s a flaming homosexual so the hot girls feel safe around him.

She better not break his heart... And... Girls these days.. Yoga pants... OMG. Would of been heaven in my 16 - 21 yrs.. My wife is super hot to me but.... Yoga pants..

Serious question. Do you take cholesterol meds? Could be your source of pain.

Class of 82... I went to liberty and my girlfriend went to Winnetonka... She was hot as pancakes...

Nope, none of that so far... just keep waking up to some new injury that I had no idea about to begin with

I'm eligible for AARP, that kinda says it all lol

He would be posting on CP right now if that's the case

Need to know if she’s 18 before I decide what to jack off to tonight

Following this post.

For a friend.

At the FBI.

This thread is giving off some weird vibes.

Can't help you then. You're just getting old.

Me? I'm 68. It's the cholesterol meds that made me hurt. Backed off of those after Mosbonian's thread a while back. Pain has went away big time.

You show up for court like that in our county and they send you home to change...and if you are late because you came dressed wrong there is hell to pay i am told.

Damn. She's hotter than the hottest girl in my class, by a factor.

I really hate that kid. :grr:

Are you sure that's not one of his teachers?

***Official Old Guys With Bald Heads and Goatees Talk About High School Aged Girls Thread***

Hey, Aqualung!

It’s pretty gross.

Aging can be a challenging topic to discuss.

I know! Who the hell rents a tux and not the shiny black shoes? And who’s the ****ing tailor?

Old you say, I say, I say son I have a 50th HS reunion this year.

I have no clue how old she is. Hell, I’m not even sure how old Kyler (my great nephew) is. She’s 23 in the world in which I grew up.

I doubt it. His grandpa would have buried him in a bean field by now.

Most people don't know this, but the reason that high schools hold homecoming in the first semester and prom in the second semester is to ensure a regular schedule of reminding people like me that girls won't go out with us.

Pictures from our school. Girls looked amazing, one young man was in his Marine uniform, lots of western cowboy looks . mid America still gets it

It's ok to admit that a high school girl is good looking.


It is NOT ok to talk about having sex with her or ogle her, or think about her in an inappropriate way.


There are a lot of girls in my school that I easily would have been scared to talk to in HS.

Yeah, ummm... WTF you creepy weirdo?

Most men do not need prostitutes.
Scho just being Scho.

I think what is so startling to me is that so many here are so starved.
And really sad.

We should probably just legalize prostitution.

You already did you liar.

I just try not to think about the fact that these girls are now young enough to be my granddaughter. And have been for a while. :sulk:

**The official Thirsty old men thread***

May I suggest joining the incel online network horny fellers

Same thing happened to me two months ago, somehow I injured my chest and upper back. No clue how.

The next time I do a gladiatorial tournament, one of the potential weapons will be the ability to withhold your opponent's prescriptions for two days before the match.

This thread is weird, but I read that Tyler Shough is likely the last player who’ll be drafted to the NFL with a birthdate before the year 2000.

That was a little tough to read.

I hear ya! About 10 months ago I started having severe hip and shoulder pain on my left side. Disabling, limped around like an old man. Was having to use the stair chair I installed a couple years ago and the wheel chair ramp I just made a few months ago.

The shots they gave me relief for a month or so, then another was needed. I was starting to think this was just how it was going to be!

Turns out it was muscle atrophy along with burcitis. After going to PT a few times and doing daily workouts for at least an hour each morning for a few months, the pain is now gone! The workouts are now a part of my daily morning routine.

**edit** This has allowed me to rebuild the upper deck completely and many other projects without pain this spring.

Yeah, at the risk of "howling at the moon" there are so many things the younger generations are doing that irritate me. The list is long.

But then I have to think back how the stuff we were doing in the 60s irritated our elders. :D

Yep, that won’t always be the case but a lot of times, chronic pain can be managed (or avoided) with strength training and exercise.

Every person on this planet should lift weights if they’re able to, IMO. Or at least do calisthenics and body weight exercises.

There were maybe 3 girls in my entire high school that was on her level. Lucky little shit. I hope he did grandpa proud in the after-prom.

The worst thing about it is... once you hit 60, these aches and pains become part of your existence. Nothing really seems to heal up and go back to where it was pre-injury. This is why Big Pharma loves to sell treatments, rather than cures.

As I began aging out of prime NFL talent territory many years ago, I told myself that I wouldn't be old as long as there was an NFL player who was older than me. God bless Morton Andersen. He bought me an extra decade of youth.

Know the feeling...had to learn to come to the realization that most of the things I did at their age made both my parents cringe.....but I have lived long enough to inherit the mantle of grumpy old man from my father.

I will wear that crown gladly and carry on the tradition of shaking my head at the younger generation. What is funny is that the younger generation that shakes their head at us and says they will never be like us when they grow old will do the same thing we are doing and our parents did ..

It's a right of passage.

Entry level old man dilemma: I found a gray hair in my temple area. My first through is to pull it. But my hair is thinning on top...I'm not sure if it would ever grow back! So should I pull it and further thin my hair or should I just take the gray?


Yeesh

Is he funny?

Girls like guys that make them laugh.

There are fine girls in every generation.

Hopefully the young man didn't high five himself to death.

I've got teenagers, and certainly miss the days of being able to say "Go to your room" and having at least someone listen.

Now the dog has even figured out based off the reactions of the 6 teenagers we've cycled (or are cycling) through the house - "I don't have to listen to this guy. What is he gonna do?"

Thanks for giving us a thread to bitch about being old. I think i needed it.


... NOT! goddamnit wtf.

Feel like i aged more just clicking on this thing. dafuq is happenin

What happened to pic. Am I too late to be a pervert with OP?

That looks like a grown woman...in body shape, in facial structure

The justifications are everything we all knew you men did.
I’m glad this thread exists.

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="und" dir="ltr">LOL <a href="https://t.co/l0rwqwUas1">pic.twitter.com/l0rwqwUas1</a></p>&mdash; Giga Based Dad (@GigaBasedDad) <a href="https://twitter.com/GigaBasedDad/status/1915321060133867878?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 24, 2025</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

Too fat and honestly a little too much cankle for me

This is a serious question for sure. Been on statins for a couple years. It was mentioned to look out for joint pain. Beyond minor arthritis I notice if I have an arm extended or bent in the same position for a long time, it feels like rigor-mortise has set in to my elbow as I try to move the joint. Like dag-nab-it that hurts.

His has been using Nair since 1974. Those balls are like a couple of smooth saggy walnuts.

People come, people go....
Some grow young, some grow cold.