Freaky Deaf couple Vs Olathe Fire Department

[R&GHomer]

They wake me and my wife up at five this morning to more of that daaats et, daaat uh, uuuuuk eeee arder. As I’m lying their staring at the ceiling contemplating how much it would cost to sound proof the wall, when all of a sudden their fire alarm goes off. They don’t miss a fuggin beat. Uuuuuuk eeee arder, daats ut, fuggin fire alarm blaring. A few minutes go by and the alarm is still going and so are they. I finally get pissed, write a note about their fire alarm going off and go over. Dude opens the door, so I hand him the note, he looks at me and closed the door like he didn’t even know how to read.

Ten minutes later they are still going at it and the fire alarm is still blaring. This is where it gets good. The Fire Department shows up. They start pounding on the door, ringing the door bell and the deaf rabbits are still getting their freak on. Next thing I know, I can hear the Fireman knocking on the bed room door. Now I’m not sure if they had finished on their own or if the fireman got their attention, but all of a sudden I hear a scream and some indiscernible comments by the fireman. At this point I’m no longer mad; I’m on the floor laughing my friggen head off. I would’ve given almost anything to have seen the look on his face as he got a full on frontal of that beast.

[Donger]

They wake me and my wife up at five this morning to more of that daaats et, daaat uh, uuuuuk eeee arder. As I’m lying their staring at the ceiling contemplating how much it would cost to sound proof the wall, when all of a sudden their fire alarm goes off. They don’t miss a fuggin beat. Uuuuuuk eeee arder, daats ut, fuggin fire alarm blaring. A few minutes go by and the alarm is still going and so are they. I finally get pissed, write a note about their fire alarm going off and go over. Dude opens the door, so I hand him the note, he looks at me and closed the door like he didn’t even know how to read.

Ten minutes later they are still going at it and the fire alarm is still blaring. This is where it gets good. The Fire Department shows up. They start pounding on the door, ringing the door bell and the deaf rabbits are still getting their freak on. Next thing I know, I can hear the Fireman knocking on the bed room door. Now I’m not sure if they had finished on their own or if the fireman got their attention, but all of a sudden I hear a scream and some indiscernible comments by the fireman. At this point I’m no longer mad; I’m on the floor laughing my friggen head off. I would’ve given almost anything to have seen the look on his face as he got a full on frontal of that beast.

I've never heard a fireman scream before.

[R&GHomer]

I've never heard a fireman scream before.

It was her screaming, I couldn't make out what he was saying.

[Saulbadguy]

Pics?

[Deberg_1990]

Pics?

Your one sick man Saul.......

[Frazod]

ROFL
Rep for making me laugh my ass off!

[Amnorix]

It was her screaming, I couldn't make out what he was saying.

Let me help: Ohmygod, my eyes! MY EYES!!!

[Spott]

Did the fireman get his freak on with her, too? Maybe she would be turned on by his really long hose.

[Iowanian]

I have a relative that is a KC fireman....................

What are the odds?

I've heard of a certain type of movie that starts with this type of plot.

"hi.......behbeh.......we're here to put out your fire..........will *this* hose reach"

Then you'd have to sleep through that PLUS the baow chica boaw baow....chica chica chic chica waaah waooow chica chica music.

[Skip Towne]

Terrific

[R&GHomer]

Did the fireman get his freak on with her, too? Maybe she would be turned on by his really long hose.

Not unless he has some kind of fat fetish. They where their for over 45 minutes :hmmm:

[jAZ]

ROFL

[KCWolfman]

Hose em down. I hope they used cold water, that separates them faster.

[Brando]

From Backdraft to Backfat these are our bravest citizens!

[R&GHomer]

Pics?

Absolutely Fuggin Not. :Lin: :loser:

[R&GHomer]

From Backdraft to Backfat these are our bravest citizens!

Those two brave souls. I wonder if their insurance covers mental problems that might develop because of it. I mean it’s almost as bad a seeing a burning baby.

[PastorMikH]

Firemen don't get paid enough for the jobs they have to do.

[Brando]

Maybe bicycle Willy will be suffering from stage fright for the next week. Maybe you'll be able to get some sleep now.

[R&GHomer]

Maybe bicycle Willy will be suffering from stage fright for the next week. Maybe you'll be able to get some sleep now.

My Wife and I where just talking about that. For the first time in over a week we didn't wake up to them going at it. Thank God for small miracles and the Olathe Fire Department.

[Braincase]

Ghostof is a firefighter?

[MOhillbilly]

EEP ORK EEK OP OP...........

[BIG_DADDY]

That's some funny shit, you gotta get those people to move though.

[Iowanian]

I think you should ask her to Sing that Danzig "mother" song when she's taking the pipe........

That would be entertaining. If she takes requests, you could have friends over to play cards or watch the game, and mute at halftime.

[Brando]

If they start up again you should paint "Fornicator" on their door in goats blood.

[R&GHomer]

Good Gawd the hits just keep coming. Now she is out walking around the complex again shouting nonsense. Of course she has to be wearing the tight bike shorts and bikini top. Damn I wish I had a bebe or pellet gun. How much fun would that be?

[Iowanian]

Now is your chance to get her.......

It sounds like you're stalking this hottie.

[Skip Towne]

She sounds like the lovelies I see at Golden Corral.

[Iowanian]

She sounds like the lovelies I see at Golden Corral.

Easy KCchiefsman........

[R&GHomer]

Now is your chance to get her.......

It sounds like you're stalking this hottie.

Hey, I’m just sitting up in my office with my window closed and I can still hear her shouting to herself every time she passes by. She is literally just walking around the complex. You have to admit, it would be funny as hell to ping her sniper style with a bebe gun ROFL

I didn’t even mention how she does her makeup, ever see the Dru Carey show? Not as bad as meme, but darn close.

[Spott]

You really need to record the deaf chick getting her freak on and post in the net so we can all share the delightful sounds with you.

[Iowanian]

That aud clip has Ebaums and college humor fame written all over it..............

[Brando]

I think you need to take one for the team and give her the Linebacker. Hut hut hut HUT!

[Brando]

either that or pay Rich Scanlon to give her the linebacker.

[elvomito]

just tell us where you live. we'll do the rest

i'm sure they'll move after we mail them a copy of themselves. (with subtitles of course)

[R&GHomer]

You really need to record the deaf chick getting her freak on and post in the net so we can all share the delightful sounds with you.

I don’t really have anything to record with. I might be able to hook up a mike to my computer; it sits close to the wall of horror, so it might work. I don’t know how good it will come out, but I could give it a try I suppose.

[KCWolfman]

I don’t really have anything to record with. I might be able to hook up a mike to my computer; it sits close to the wall of horror, so it might work. I don’t know how good it will come out, but I could give it a try I suppose.
The wall of horror? That's great. I can see you cringing on the opposite side of the apartment in full fetal position with shakes more severe than a heroin addict on the second day of a cold turkey stop. If you do record, please occassionally say something like "mmm-mm-ooother" or "please God, make it stop" to add to the hilarity.

[Ghostof]

Ghostof is a firefighter?



This made me laugh




Guys want to hear another story?

[KCWolfman]

No.
Hell, no!!! I just ate lunch.

[Swanman]

Hell, no!!! I just ate lunch.

I want to be able to eat lunch at some point this week, so I'll pass.

[Ghostof]

Ah

shucks


Its not that bad really.


It only caused me to be sent to the hospital.



or maybe I could talk about the time up north of Liberty


or maybe I could talk about the golf course....and what it really means to be in the rough


theres just so many options.

[KC Kings]

They wake me and my wife up at five this morning to more of that daaats et, daaat uh, uuuuuk eeee arder. As I’m lying their staring at the ceiling contemplating how much it would cost to sound proof the wall, when all of a sudden their fire alarm goes off. They don’t miss a fuggin beat. Uuuuuuk eeee arder, daats ut, fuggin fire alarm blaring. A few minutes go by and the alarm is still going and so are they. I finally get pissed, write a note about their fire alarm going off and go over. Dude opens the door, so I hand him the note, he looks at me and closed the door like he didn’t even know how to read.

Ten minutes later they are still going at it and the fire alarm is still blaring. This is where it gets good. The Fire Department shows up. They start pounding on the door, ringing the door bell and the deaf rabbits are still getting their freak on. Next thing I know, I can hear the Fireman knocking on the bed room door. Now I’m not sure if they had finished on their own or if the fireman got their attention, but all of a sudden I hear a scream and some indiscernible comments by the fireman. At this point I’m no longer mad; I’m on the floor laughing my friggen head off. I would’ve given almost anything to have seen the look on his face as he got a full on frontal of that beast.

Didn't this same thing happen on an episode of "Benny Hill"?

[R&GHomer]

I think you should ask her to Sing that Danzig "mother" song when she's taking the pipe........

That would be entertaining. If she takes requests, you could have friends over to play cards or watch the game, and mute at halftime.


I’d imagine just about anything she’d sing would be entertaining to say the least.

Iid ewww evur noo dat ooor mah erro, uuvereh ing ahh ont uuubeee, Eww ar daa ind enig ah ails.

[Iowanian]

She sounds perfect for James Brown Songs.

[R&GHomer]

She sounds perfect for James Brown Songs.

I evv in umerica “Que Boyfriend for pooper shot” ah ACKKKDKDKKCKC ACK. ROFL

:thumb: Good call.

[Brando]

If I were you I would pass her a note that says, "This time the fire department. Next time Animal Control."

[R&GHomer]

bump

[Phobia]

bump

Nice post, Gunther Fan.

[R&GHomer]

A friend wanted to read it. Sorry. + he has actually seen the beast in real life.

[Molitoth]

tis me whom hath seen the beast!

So im on my way to R&G's house one day and I see this tremendously plump nasty chik walking down the street with biker shorts and makup caked on her face like she just pulled her head out of a poo infested toilet. As i gorge my eyes out, i nearly miss his house, but make it inside to tell him about the walking growth i had witnessed. Then he reminds me thats the thing that he has been telling me at work that had moved in next door. hahahaha I feel sorry for him having to wake up to her nasty ass sitting outside in a bikini sanbathing in the front lawn. Think marylin manson +300 pounds.

[Brando]

tis me whom hath seen the beast!

So im on my way to R&G's house one day and I see this tremendously plump nasty chik walking down the street with biker shorts and makup caked on her face like she just pulled her head out of a poo infested toilet. As i gorge my eyes out, i nearly miss his house, but make it inside to tell him about the walking growth i had witnessed. Then he reminds me thats the thing that he has been telling me at work that had moved in next door. hahahaha I feel sorry for him having to wake up to her nasty ass sitting outside in a bikini sanbathing in the front lawn. Think marylin manson +300 pounds.

This thread is worthless without pics

[Braincase]

This thread is worthless without pics

I'm all for keeping this thread worthless.

[Brando]

I suppose you want another Ghostof story, too.

I think Ghost of is on one of those computes inside of a Maximum Security Penitentiary.

[Baby Lee]

Heeyyy!! Howds jur newds???
Wood-ju like to sing-a tune?????

http://www.howsyournews.com/mp3/01_HowsYourNews.mp3

[Brando]

For the good of society, I hope so.

I think that Ghost of is West Coast slang for "Plunger Rape".

[TEX]

R & G Homer,
How could they hear you at the door if they couldn't hear the fire alarm? :hmmm:

[Ghostof]

Just for that last comment.




A few weeks after breaking up with my ex, who licked my sperm puddle off the carpet floor, I started seeing another chick over in Missouri. Now this one was slightly smaller, still around 150 lb. though. We started screwing around and she didnt shave down south....EVER. Hearing stories about the deaf chick made me think. You gotta wonder if she shaves down south. If she does, you also gotta wonder if she wears a thong. Theres a great image...huh....some 300 pound chick wearing a black thong, only the morning that she slipped it on, it was white. It turned black over the course of the day from the seepage running down her ass crack.

Anyways, this chick and I were messing around on her floor. She stood up and said she be right back. She came back wearing a nighty. She laid back down on the floor and I started running my hand down south. All I felt was bush. Damn, all my other ex's were either shaved or had a landing strip down there. This chick had pubes growing all over the place down there. I didnt care at the time and started in. She climaxed and right before i climax, i pull out. She takes off the condom, turns it inside out and cleans it off with her tongue.

oh hell, another freak

THEN...she tells me that she wants to take a shower with me. but only one catch...theres no water involved. She was laying in the tub, naked, and I stood above her, peeing on her. She didnt care where at, she was soaking it up. She even got a good mouthful.

A few days later I never called her again. She did something the next day that I had never seen in my life, nor will I ever want to see again. I never talked to her again either. She scared me.

[Baby Lee]

Just for that last comment.




A few weeks after breaking up with my ex, who licked my sperm puddle off the carpet floor, I started seeing another chick over in Missouri. Now this one was slightly smaller, still around 150 lb. though. We started screwing around and she didnt shave down south....EVER. Hearing stories about the deaf chick made me think. You gotta wonder if she shaves down south. If she does, you also gotta wonder if she wears a thong. Theres a great image...huh....some 300 pound chick wearing a black thong, only the morning that she slipped it on, it was white. It turned black over the course of the day from the seepage running down her ass crack.

Anyways, this chick and I were messing around on her floor. She stood up and said she be right back. She came back wearing a nighty. She laid back down on the floor and I started running my hand down south. All I felt was bush. Damn, all my other ex's were either shaved or had a landing strip down there. This chick had pubes growing all over the place down there. I didnt care at the time and started in. She climaxed and right before i climax, i pull out. She takes off the condom, turns it inside out and cleans it off with her tongue.

oh hell, another freak

THEN...she tells me that she wants to take a shower with me. but only one catch...theres no water involved. She was laying in the tub, naked, and I stood above her, peeing on her. She didnt care where at, she was soaking it up. She even got a good mouthful.

A few days later I never called her again. She did something the next day that I had never seen in my life, nor will I ever want to see again. I never talked to her again either. She scared me.
Does her trail to glory reach all the way up to her belly button? All the way to her chest hairs?

[Baby Lee]

So, the condom sucking and golden shower were ok with you... but, she managed to top them, huh?
I'm picturing certain a scene from 'Pink Flamigos.'

[ptlyon]

My neighbor's roommate used to date a stripper that gave his dog handjobs.

That ain't right.

Never date strippers, kids. They're all f*cking insane. Just bang 'em, and move on.

Delt - the first time you marry for love, the second time you marry a stripper

[Baby Lee]

Never seen-- hell, I've never heard of that.
Aside from the fact that it should have been Pink Flamingos. . .

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069089/

[Baby Lee]

:eek: Time to head to the video store.
Are you at least familar with John Waters? He kind of looks like Steve Buscemi's gay older brother. This movie, and a number of similarly shocking low budget movies [Hairspray is probably the most known]sprang from his mind.
http://ia.imdb.com/media/imdb/01/I/56/35/12m.jpg

[Brando]

Just for that last comment.




A few weeks after breaking up with my ex, who licked my sperm puddle off the carpet floor, I started seeing another chick over in Missouri. Now this one was slightly smaller, still around 150 lb. though. We started screwing around and she didnt shave down south....EVER. Hearing stories about the deaf chick made me think. You gotta wonder if she shaves down south. If she does, you also gotta wonder if she wears a thong. Theres a great image...huh....some 300 pound chick wearing a black thong, only the morning that she slipped it on, it was white. It turned black over the course of the day from the seepage running down her ass crack.

Anyways, this chick and I were messing around on her floor. She stood up and said she be right back. She came back wearing a nighty. She laid back down on the floor and I started running my hand down south. All I felt was bush. Damn, all my other ex's were either shaved or had a landing strip down there. This chick had pubes growing all over the place down there. I didnt care at the time and started in. She climaxed and right before i climax, i pull out. She takes off the condom, turns it inside out and cleans it off with her tongue.

oh hell, another freak

THEN...she tells me that she wants to take a shower with me. but only one catch...theres no water involved. She was laying in the tub, naked, and I stood above her, peeing on her. She didnt care where at, she was soaking it up. She even got a good mouthful.

A few days later I never called her again. She did something the next day that I had never seen in my life, nor will I ever want to see again. I never talked to her again either. She scared me.

Is that when you started hacking up hookers on Prospect?

[Brando]

I must've missed that day of school.


Ha hahahaha...you and school LOL That's two things that go together like Ghost of and a hot chick.

[Brando]

On the contrary... I was quite the nerd in my school days.

Glad to see a lot hasn't changed :p

[Brando]

Well, now I get laid once or twice a year. But, yeah, other than that it's pretty much all the same.

You don't give golden showers to ramdom, shit eating, fat skanks?
Shame on you :)

[Brando]

Not intentionally.
Probably for the best. Keeps you out of Sheriff Joe's jail.

[Brando]

Eh... I've spent some time there. It ain't all that bad.
Did you take home your pink underoos?

[Brando]

I was in work release. Didn't have to wear the stripes and pink undies.

I've got a buddy who did some time in stripes. He kept the pink boxers. Mildly amusing since the reason they switched to pink was to discourage theft. My buddy isn't exactly hurting for money. I'd imagine some of the destitute criminals aren't letting the color stand in the way of some free undies.

What did the "man" accuse you of?

[Ghostof]

Actually, all these stories thus far have been made up.




Which also proves my point that you guys are gullible believing everything a stranger types here


and also believing that the Chiefs have a chance for a playoff spot

[Brando]

Actually, all these stories thus far have been made up.




Which also proves my point that you guys are gullible believing everything a stranger types here


and also believing that the Chiefs have a chance for a playoff spot

You spend entirely too much time in mom's basement.

[Iowanian]

Actually, all these stories thus far have been made up.




Which also proves my point that you guys are gullible believing everything a stranger types here


and also believing that the Chiefs have a chance for a playoff spot

I knew it....................

I didn't suspect you could score with a non-hooker for a minute.

[Brando]

Driving with a BAC of .20
That's a bif no no there huh? :P Didn't you explain that it was just your Aqua Velva?

[Brando]

Well, I sure didn't tell him I was coming home from penny draft night.

I had had my AZ license for one day. I remember when I went into the MVD to get an ID. They look me up in the computer... broad behind desk... "Well, didn't hang on to that long, did ya?"

LMAO...my older bro lived out there with my folks for about a year. He got pulled over after gonig to "Big Ass Beer Night" down in Tempe. I'm not sure of the bar it was at.
The cop that pulled him over told him to sleep it off in his car. He slept it off and drove directly to work the next morning. Damn lucky.

[Brando]

Big Ass Beer Night. That would be the Timberwolf. I still have a couple Big Ass Beer glasses at home.

Sadly, the TimberWolf fell victim to Tempe's anti-smoking law, and is now closed.

Anti-smoking law...GRRRRR!!! You know how to make my blood boil sir!

[Ghostof]

More bars need anti smoking bans.


Lawrence has one..


Every city needs one.


Just because waiters put you in a non smoking section, doesnt mean you arent still breathing in second hand smoke.

If you have to light up, do it outside so it doesnt affect everyone else.

Its your fault you are addicted to smoking, go smoke outside.

[Brando]

More bars need anti smoking bans.


Lawrence has one..


Every city needs one.


Just because waiters put you in a non smoking section, doesnt mean you arent still breathing in second hand smoke.

If you have to light up, do it outside so it doesnt affect everyone else.

Its your fault you are addicted to smoking, go smoke outside.

If you go to a bar and are drinking alcohol you have no right to complain about smoking. I will agree with eating establishments but not bars.

[Ghostof]

Thats obvious, sorry I didnt include that. I am not talking about bars, just stating about eating establishments.

At bars, anything goes.

[Demonpenz]

no smoking section in a place is like a no pissing section of a pool

[Ghostof]

Get f*cked.


Its a restaurant...people want to eat, not deal with smokers adictive issues.

Take that crap outside where you can pollute the environment and then throw your cigarette butt on the ground, like all the others instead of throwing it away.


If its a bar, get drunk, smoke, be merry...if its an BBQ joint, smoke outside.


Hell, if a bill came up that said ban all smoking, I'd sign it and raise peoples awareness and have as many as I could sign it.

[Demonpenz]

on a side not i love to smoke, because the worst thing they can do is tell you to go outside. I love lighting up a cool menthol and watch all the libbies scatter

[Demonpenz]

Its a restaurant...people want to eat, not deal with smokers adictive issues.

Take that crap outside where you can pollute the environment and then throw your cigarette butt on the ground, like all the others instead of throwing it away.


If its a bar, get drunk, smoke, be merry...if its an BBQ joint, smoke outside.


Hell, if a bill came up that said ban all smoking, I'd sign it and raise peoples awareness and have as many as I could sign it.

If a bill came with the phrase "Gostof is the biggest pussy" I would probably sign it

[Brando]

No smoking in bars make me about as sick as fat deaf neighbors plugging their sh*tter with a meat stick.

[Ghostof]

Anti-smoking law...GRRRRR!!! You know how to make my blood boil sir!



I seen this and thought I'd troll a bit on a Tuesday afternoon.


Lots of sensitive smokers here.

[KC Kings]

Its a restaurant...people want to eat, not deal with smokers adictive issues.

Take that crap outside where you can pollute the environment and then throw your cigarette butt on the ground, like all the others instead of throwing it away.


If its a bar, get drunk, smoke, be merry...if its an BBQ joint, smoke outside.


Hell, if a bill came up that said ban all smoking, I'd sign it and raise peoples awareness and have as many as I could sign it.

I smoked for 10 years, and now that I have quit smoking I can't stand the smell of cigarettes. I can tell if there is a smoker in the car in front of me, when I go to a bar I can smell the smoke in my car for the next couple of days, and the smell of an ash tray turns my stomach.

That being said, I was in O'Charlies last night, walked right through the smoking area to the bathroom, and it stunk like smoke. I couldn't smell the smoke when I got back to my table, it didn't affect my food or my experience, so to expect them to rule against smoking indoors would be petty and ridiculous. The only restaraunts I ever have problem with, are places like CJ's in Grandview, and the Train place over in KCK. Those places reek of smoke, but instead of whining about it and trying to make everybody else change to please me, I no longer go to those restaraunts.

As far as the health risk for non-smokers, there are millions of smokers that smoke all their lives and never get cancer. Sure, children of smokers are 20 times more likely to have asthma and allergies and all sorts of other chit, but if you think a passing drift of second hand smoke is detrimental to your health, you are a jack nut.

[Brando]

Somehow I'm guessing even if the owner of the Timber Wolf was a non-smoker he has a lower opinion of the ban than even me.

The Tempe smoking ban doesn't really affect me anymore. They banned smoking, so I started driving 10 minutes more to drink in Scottsdale. Then, I bought a home in Scottsdale. Problem solved. Tempe doesn't want smokers in their city? Fine, I'll leave.

Course, a lot of non-smokers seem to make their way to Scottsdale as well. Guess it's not as much fun to hang out in empty bars.

The New York State smoking ban killed the night life in Syracuse. No one goes out anymore. They just throw big parties and smoke in there homes. I am constantly getting calls from friends telling me about all the places that have closed down.
That was a great shot in the arm for the rust belt economy that they have.

[Ghostof]

Scottsdale..thats cool


I had some friends that lived on "Pinnacle Peak" I think thats what it was called.

[Brando]

I live in Old Town. So I can walk to the bars.

Old Town is sweet

[KCWolfman]

I live in Old Town. So I can walk to the bars.
The community of Phoenix thanks you for your patronage and their safety.

[CosmicPal]

You really need to add this story to craigslist.org

It is certain to make their "Best of" list.

[Brando]

Much better Avatar Cos!

[Brando]

What did he have before? I forget.

It was a smiley with a headband flashing the peace sign. It looked like Roy before the tiger mauled him.

[Rain Man]

The New York State smoking ban killed the night life in Syracuse. No one goes out anymore. They just throw big parties and smoke in there homes. I am constantly getting calls from friends telling me about all the places that have closed down.
That was a great shot in the arm for the rust belt economy that they have.


Not to mention all of the lost hospital and mortuary jobs.