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View Full Version : Conspiracy? Coincidence? Elvis & Jesus


Braincase
12-21-2004, 02:22 PM
Jesus said: "Love thy neighbor." (Matthew 22:39)
Elvis said: "Don't be cruel." (RCA, 1956)
Jesus is the Lords's shepherd.
Elvis dated Cybill Shepherd.

Jesus was part of the Trinity.
Elvis' first band was a trio.

Jesus walked on water. (Matthew 14:25)
Elvis surfed. (Blue Hawaii, Paramount, 1965)

Jesus' entourage, the Apostles, had 12 members.
Elvis' entourage, the Memphis Mafia, had 12 members.

Jesus was resurrected.
Elvis had the famous 1968 "comeback" TV special.

Jesus said, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink."(John 7:37)
Elvis said, "Drinks on me!" (Jailhouse Rock, MGM, 1957)

Jesus fasted for 40 days and nights.
Elvis had irregular eating habits. (e.g. 5 banana splits for
breakfast)

Jesus is a Capricorn. (December 25)
Elvis is a Capricorn. (January 8)

Matthew was one of Jesus' many biographers. (The Gospel According to Matthew)
Neil Matthews was one of Elvis' many biographers. (Elvis: A Golden
Tribute)

"[Jesus] countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as
snow."(Matthew 28:3) Elvis wore snow-white jumpsuits with lightening bolts.

Jesus lived in state of grace in a Near Eastern land.
Elvis lived in Graceland in a nearly eastern state.

Mary, an important woman in Jesus' life, had an Immaculate Conception.
Priscilla, an important woman in Elvis' life, went to Immaculate
Conception High School.

Jesus was first and foremost the Son of God.
Elvis first recorded with Sun Studios, which today are still
considered to be his foremost recordings.

Jesus was the lamb of God.
Elvis had mutton chop sideburns.

Jesus' Father is everywhere.
Elvis' father was a drifter, and moved around quite a bit.

Jesus was a carpenter.
Elvis' favorite high school class was wood shop.

Jesus wore a crown of thorns.
Elvis wore Royal Crown hair styler.

Jesus H. Christ has 12 letters.
Elvis Presley has 12 letters.

No one knows what the "H" in "Jesus H. Christ" stood for.
No one was really sure if Elvis' middle name was "Aron" or "Aaron".

Jesus said: "Man shall not live by bread alone."
Elvis liked his sandwiches with peanut butter and bananas.

Dr. Johnny Fever
12-21-2004, 02:25 PM
Some religions believe Jesus was actually born in September.

MichaelH
12-21-2004, 02:29 PM
Some religions believe Jesus was actually born in September.


Oh great, I'm real late with my Christmas shopping then.

Zebedee DuBois
12-21-2004, 02:30 PM
I think the "H" was for Horatio.

Boon
12-21-2004, 02:32 PM
Jesus was born in a manger.
Elvis was born im Mississippi.

htismaqe
12-21-2004, 02:33 PM
Some religions believe Jesus was actually born in September.

Yep, like the Hindu's for instance...

Dr. Johnny Fever
12-21-2004, 02:53 PM
Yep, like the Hindu's for instance...
It seems, if I'm remembering correctly, that Mormon's believe that also. Someone who is christian told me last week that the bible even "illudes" to it....????

htismaqe
12-21-2004, 02:57 PM
It seems, if I'm remembering correctly, that Mormon's believe that also. Someone who is christian told me last week that the bible even "illudes" to it....????

Actually, I was making fun of you.

Several DENOMINATIONS believe different things about Christ, including stuff like him being born in September.

Other RELIGIONS don't believe anything about Christ. Only Judaism and Islam, other than Christianity, even acknowledge his existence.

;)

ptlyon
12-21-2004, 02:59 PM
They both wore capes.

Oh, and they both rode a Harley Davidson.

Dr. Johnny Fever
12-21-2004, 03:11 PM
Actually, I was making fun of you.

Several DENOMINATIONS believe different things about Christ, including stuff like him being born in September.

Other RELIGIONS don't believe anything about Christ. Only Judaism and Islam, other than Christianity, even acknowledge his existence.

;)
Yea.........................well.....................................fine. damn it.

Zebedee DuBois
12-21-2004, 04:43 PM
They both wore capes.

Oh, and they both rode a Harley Davidson.

On second thought, the "H" stood for Harley.

Dartgod
12-21-2004, 04:55 PM
First Down Jesus?

Dave Lane
12-21-2004, 05:01 PM
Some religions believe Jesus was actually born in September.

Some believe he never existed...

Dave

Rain Man
12-21-2004, 05:07 PM
Jesus' killer condemned him from a throne.

Elvis died on the throne.

Braincase
12-21-2004, 05:44 PM
First Down Jesus?

Touchdown Jesus!

stevieray
12-21-2004, 05:56 PM
Touchdown Jesus!

touchdown symbol is arms pointing up... :hmmm: