I'm a bachelor for a week.

[Rain Man]

My wife is going out of town on business, and you know what that means. I'll be ordering in a LOT of chinese food and watching a LOT of television.

I'm so boring that even I can't stand to be around myself sometimes.

[|Zach|]

http://www.imaginarygirlfriends.com/

[Ultra Peanut]

Did you stock up on ramen noodles yet?

[Rain Man]

I'm thinking about taking off my shoes when I get home AND NOT PUTTING THEM AWAY. This is going to be incredible.

[Saulbadguy]

Hookers?

[Rain Man]

Maybe. Let me go check out www.imaginaryhookers.com.

[Rain Man]

Did you stock up on ramen noodles yet?

Rich bachelor. I'm going to be a rich bachelor. We're talking Sesame Chicken every night if I want it. With those little paper-wrapped chicken things that she hates.

[MichaelH]

Lucky Bastard!

[FloridaChief]

I'll be ordering in a LOT of chinese food

Since your ordering, I'd like some Moo Goo Gui Pan...

[|Zach|]

Did she leave town because of your unexplained new found intrest in butt sex?

[Rain Man]

Did she leave town because of your unexplained new found intrest in butt sex?

Yeah. Apparently there's some etiquette about "ask first" that I missed. Like I'm going to ask Emily Post or something.

[FloridaChief]

Since your ordering, I'd like some Moo Goo Gui Pan...

Okay. How bout some General Tso's chicken, then?

[stevieray]

I've heard the food at Diamond Cabaret is awesome.

[FloridaChief]

'Kay, I see I'm getting nowhere with this...


Chicken Almond Ding is a nice 3rd choice. And throw in an order of beef fried rice and an eggroll. But the eggroll must NOT contain seafood of any type. I'm afraid I'm a tyrant about this...

[Rain Man]

I've heard the food at Diamond Cabaret is awesome.

Hmm, I've heard of this restaurant. Maybe I'll have to go check out this restaurant. And this restaurant isn't far from my work.

[Rain Man]

'Kay, I see I'm getting nowhere with this...


Chicken Almond Ding is a nice 3rd choice. And throw in an order of beef fried rice and an eggroll. But the eggroll must NOT contain seafood of any type. I'm afraid I'm a tyrant about this...


Why would I order anything else if they've got sesame chicken? I don't understand.

[Skip Towne]

Just a week? Poor guy.

[FloridaChief]

Why would I order anything else if they've got sesame chicken? I don't understand.

Allright!

Throw in some hot and sour soup and it's a deal...




But no fish in the eggroll--just you remember that!!!

[Kerberos]

My wife is going out of town on business, and you know what that means. I'll be ordering in a LOT of chinese food and watching a LOT of television.

I'm so boring that even I can't stand to be around myself sometimes.

You could break down and take GoChiefs to a movie ... he needs some excitement and who knows he might even help you out with your newfound facination with BUTT SEX! He says hes a virgin butt we all know better !!

ROFL

Cliff

[Bowser]

With no wife to answer to, I'd say it's time to go steal a bike.

[Phobia]

The last time your wife went out of town for a week, we both know where.... This time, I know nothing of it. She must have enjoyed the Texas weather more than she enjoyed the anal rampage. :(

[Hammock Parties]

My favorite chinese food is sesame chicken or kung pao chicken with chicken fried rice, an egg roll or two and a nice bowl of egg drop soup. Good shit.

[Bowser]

My favorite chinese food is sesame chicken or kung pao chicken with chicken fried rice, an egg roll or two and a nice bowl of egg drop soup. Good shit.

FLIED LICE, YOU CLAZY PLICK!!!!

[FloridaChief]

My favorite chinese food is sesame chicken or kung pao chicken with chicken fried rice, an egg roll or two and a nice bowl of egg drop soup. Good shit.

You left out the obligatory "creme of sum yung jedi soup", fool...

[Rain Man]

My Bachelor Week Diary: Hours 1 and 2.

My wife headed off to the airport two hours ago. I'm footloose and fancyfree, a drop of water on a sizzling grill.

I look left, look right. I'm still in the house. Let's get this show on the road. First things first, I'm going to need clothes. I go down to the basement and throw a load of clothes in the washer. I mix different colors, purely because I can. It feels great!

Then I decide that I'll need food. It's off to the grocery store. Woohoo! What do I like? What do I like? I practically jog through the aisles, like a kid in a candy store, but a candy store that also carries produce and meat and stuff. I get a frozen pizza for lunch, and I buy milk, eggs, and those awesome little Jiffy blueberry muffin mixes. I buy a 2-liter Dr. Pepper and I may drink it all today; who knows? Limits are out the door. I think about buying some tollhouse cookie dough, but I don't want to burn out too fast. The cats need food and I buy them some - all beef flavors, because they're on a bachelor week, too.

Then it's back home, and it's time to further shed my responsibilities. The way to do that is to get all of the bills paid. One by one, I knock them out, writing checks and affixing stamps and entering them in the checkbook.

Then everything's set. But wait! The washer has turned off! I go back downstairs and transfer the clothes to the dryer, and put another load in. I start the dryer, and don't even add one of those little static cling sheets. Back to basics.

Now I'm upstairs, getting ready to write a survey for a client, but I thought I'd visit chiefsplanet first. Wow!

[alanm]

Why would I order anything else if they've got sesame chicken? I don't understand.Mongolian Beef.:thumb:

[Gaz]

Leave the toilet seat up.

xoxo~
Gaz
Wild, wild man.

[Phobia]

Bachelors don't do laundry, Kevin. Please start again.

[alanm]

My Bachelor Week Diary: Hours 1 and 2.

My wife headed off to the airport two hours ago. I'm footloose and fancyfree, a drop of water on a sizzling grill.

I look left, look right. I'm still in the house. Let's get this show on the road. First things first, I'm going to need clothes. I go down to the basement and throw a load of clothes in the washer. I mix different colors, purely because I can. It feels great!

Then I decide that I'll need food. It's off to the grocery store. Woohoo! What do I like? What do I like? I practically jog through the aisles, like a kid in a candy store, but a candy store that also carries produce and meat and stuff. I get a frozen pizza for lunch, and I buy milk, eggs, and those awesome little Jiffy blueberry muffin mixes. I buy a 2-liter Dr. Pepper and I may drink it all today; who knows? Limits are out the door. I think about buying some tollhouse cookie dough, but I don't want to burn out too fast. The cats need food and I buy them some - all beef flavors, because they're on a bachelor week, too.

Then it's back home, and it's time to further shed my responsibilities. The way to do that is to get all of the bills paid. One by one, I knock them out, writing checks and affixing stamps and entering them in the checkbook.

Then everything's set. But wait! The washer has turned off! I go back downstairs and transfer the clothes to the dryer, and put another load in. I start the dryer, and don't even one of those little static cling sheets. Back to basics.

Now I'm upstairs, getting ready to write a survey for a client, but I thought I'd visit chiefsplanet first. Wow!Wow!! Just reading about this... I'm ready for a nap. :)

[alanm]

Bachelors don't do laundry, Kevin. Please start again.Phil's right Kevin. You should leave all the laundry strewn about the house for when the wife gets back. It somehow makes them feel wanted.

[Rain Man]

Bachelorhood Diary, Day 1.


After the first couple of hours, things slowed down a little bit. I nuked a frozen dinner for dinner, and made myself some of those delicious Jiffy blueberry muffins. In order to clear my plate for running wild, I worked until 1 a.m. on a survey for a client.

I've got three more nights to run wild. The possibilities are endless!

[Skip Towne]

Bachelorhood Diary, Day 1.


After the first couple of hours, things slowed down a little bit. I nuked a frozen dinner for dinner, and made myself some of those delicious Jiffy blueberry muffins. In order to clear my plate for running wild, I worked until 1 a.m. on a survey for a client.

I've got three more nights to run wild. The possibilities are endless!
I'm on the edge of my seat.

[Phobia]

I've got three more nights to run wild. The possibilities are endless!

I'll probably be in town thursday. Wanna go to your favorite titty bar? I know I can't count very well, but maybe your wife can't either.

[Jenson71]

Is anyone watching the bachelorette? I told this girl I'd watch it tonight...

[Hammock Parties]

Is anyone watching the bachelorette? I told this girl I'd watch it tonight...

So you're whipped without the pussy....way to go.

[Jenson71]

So you're whipped without the pussy....way to go.

Hell I ain't watching it. Someone tell me what's going on.

[stevieray]

You gotta play some music. LOUD.

At least one song.

[Hammock Parties]

Hell I ain't watching it. Someone tell me what's going on.

Thou art redeemed.

[|Zach|]

You gotta play some music. LOUD.

At least one song.
http://www.mattscdsingles.com/acatalog/vanilla%20ice%20funky.jpg

[dtebbe]

Words to live by...

Once a day either way....

Use your imagination.

DT

[Rain Man]

Bachelorhood Diary, Day 4.


I had to buy more dishes because all of the old ones are dirty, and I don't know what to do with them. I appear to have lost all of my underwear. I think that the cats have gone feral. I can't find my car.

[Straight, No Chaser]

Bachelorhood Diary, Day 4.


I had to buy more dishes because all of the old ones are dirty, and I don't know what to do with them. I appear to have lost all of my underwear. I think that the cats have gone feral. I can't find my car.

Dude.
I can't believe what I'm reading. You're writing about my life too :thumb:

I can't wait until the next entry. How long did you say she'll be out of town?



---->

[HarryParatestes]

Bachelorhood Diary, Day 4.


I had to buy more dishes because all of the old ones are dirty, and I don't know what to do with them. I appear to have lost all of my underwear. I think that the cats have gone feral. I can't find my car.


I've read this book before... Flowers for Algernon

ROFL