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View Full Version : Tom Sizemore's Fake Dick


nychief
02-11-2005, 10:16 PM
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Actor Tom Sizemore has been jailed for violating his probation by failing a drug test after he was caught trying to use a prosthetic penis to fake the results, a Los Angeles County prosecutor said on Friday.
Sizemore, 43, who played a battle-hardened sergeant in the war movie "Saving Private Ryan," was placed in custody on Thursday. He was ordered to remain behind bars until a hearing on Feb. 24, unless he posts $25,000 bond, Deputy District Attorney Sean Carney said.

Last month, Judge Antonio Baretto had agreed to allow Sizemore to travel to Cambodia to shoot a new film on condition that he pass a drug test every day prior to his departure.

Carney said the actor's failed attempt to fake his drug test results came on the first day of the new requirement.

The actor is required to undergo random drug tests as a condition of probation for his convictions on separate charges of methamphetamine possession and beating his ex-girlfriend, former Hollywood madam Heidi Fleiss.

During Thursday's proceedings, prosecutors told Judge Baretto that Sizemore failed three drug tests in three days, the first after he was caught using a fake penis sewn into his boxer shorts and filled with a clean urine sample kept warm by a heating pack.

Carney said the ruse was revealed when the temperature of the sample proved too cool to have come from Sizemore's body, and he was asked to remove his pants.

According to prosecutors, Sizemore had been caught once before trying to use a similar device, sold over the Internet under the brand name the Whizzinator, and had failed drug tests on at least five occasions.

Carney said two drug tests on the days following the fake penis incident showed Sizemore had methamphetamine in his system.

During the hearing, Sizemore's lawyer told the court that his client was destitute, living in a garage in Whittier, California, and that he was an expectant father, Carney told Reuters.

But Baretto told Sizemore that his drug use was "out of control," adding, "I had hoped and wanted to see a positive performance."

Rain Man
02-11-2005, 10:24 PM
Desitute? Can a destitute man afford a Whizzinator? Huh? Huh?

nychief
02-11-2005, 10:39 PM
Desitute? Can a destitute man afford a Whizzinator? Huh? Huh?
ROFL

theultimatekcchiefsfan
02-11-2005, 11:35 PM
The wife and I actually sat next to this guy at a restaraunt in LA and he shared his pizza with our little nephew who we were watching that day. He seemed like an ok guy for the Hollywood type. We talked to him about Private Ryan and Lock-Up. He was all excited because he had just got his first headline billing for he was working on "Red Planet" at the time.
It had several big stars in it, but he insisted that he was the STAR of the movie.

Anyway who knew he had a fake dick at the time.

This was pre-Heide Fleiss.

warpaint99
02-12-2005, 01:32 AM
http://www.thewhizzinator.com/images/Wiz_Man.gif http://www.thewhizzinator.com/Image/Original-Whizzinator-Logo.gif

Miles
02-12-2005, 02:10 AM
Man the government should really consider regulating the Whizzinator market. Only one company making them really screws the consumer.

Taco John
02-12-2005, 03:15 AM
YES, WE SELL DEHYDRATED URNIE SEPARATLEY (http://www.thewhizzinator.com/whiz2.htm)

OldTownChief
02-12-2005, 03:33 AM
My dicks bigger than Tom Sizemores

Rausch
02-12-2005, 04:27 AM
http://i.cnn.net/cnn/2003/LAW/08/15/actor.trial.ap/story.vert.sizemore.ap.jpg

"I am SO ****ed..."

Miles
02-12-2005, 04:39 AM
Roll the Dice...Take a chance.

Rausch
02-12-2005, 04:47 AM
Roll the Dice...Take a chance.
ROFL

Digital Takawira
02-12-2005, 07:28 AM
He was all excited because he had just got his first headline billing for he was working on "Red Planet" at the time.


well, of course he was all excited. he was tweaking his balls off. meth is funny like that.


meth=stupidest drug on earth. why people want to stay up for multiple days straight is beyond me. i love sleep too much to do some bullshit like that.

Braincase
02-12-2005, 09:20 AM
I hear headsnap has purchased the "Lord Hamercy" model, guaranteed to make a nun cry.

seclark
02-12-2005, 09:25 AM
maybe it's just me, but two dicks in the same pair of pants sounds f@cked up.
sec

Baby Lee
02-12-2005, 09:30 AM
Tom Sizemore's Fake Dick
And that, children, is how garage bands get their names.

siberian khatru
02-12-2005, 09:44 AM
YES, WE SELL DEHYDRATED URNIE SEPARATLEY (http://www.thewhizzinator.com/whiz2.htm)

Urnie Conwell?

nychief
02-12-2005, 01:19 PM
Gee, I wonder what "Size"more he bought?

BigChiefFan
02-12-2005, 03:54 PM
Urnie Conwell? ROFL ROFL
ROFL :thumb: Funny stuff.

Talisman
02-12-2005, 04:10 PM
And that, children, is how garage bands get their names.
ROFL

KCWolfman
02-12-2005, 04:20 PM
How can someone fail a drug test 5 times and still be on probation?

I realize most of you scream about how unfair drug sampling and illegal drugs are in this society, but obviously you have to screw up royal before you are ever seriously charged and committed to serving any time.

Miles
02-12-2005, 04:46 PM
How can someone fail a drug test 5 times and still be on probation?


I imagine being a somewhat known actor and having some money help a lot.

KCWolfman
02-12-2005, 05:00 PM
I imagine being a somewhat known actor and having some money help a lot.
Not as much as the dough itself.

Anyone with money can get a lawyer and scam scam scam for 3, 4, and evidently even more violations and still stay on the streets.

My B-i-L failed 3 screens and still wasn't jailed after he was caught producing meth in his house, within 70 yrds of a school, with 3 kids living in the house. He is no one famous, just had plenty of dough to keep getting out of it.

Sure-Oz
02-12-2005, 06:00 PM
Tom Sizemore's best role "Lock Up" starring Sylvestor Stallone adn the guy that does the Volvo voice.