Chocolate Jesus

[Bob Dole]

Would you buy one?

KANSAS CITY, Mo. - A symbol of Christianity that sits atop church steeples, dangles from necks and hangs on walls is now ending up in the mouths of the faithful, over the objections of some religious officials.

A mass-produced chocolate cross is being sold this Easter by Russell Stover Candies Inc. in about 5,000 stores nationwide, which experts say is apparently a first for a major American company.

"Obviously they've seen that there's a market for chocolate crosses at Easter," said Lisbeth Echeandia, a consultant for Candy Information Service, which monitors candy industry trends. "I don't see it growing tremendously but I think there would be growth in the Christian market."

However, not all Christians are happy about it. Chomping on a chocolate cross can be offensive to some, said Joseph McAleer, a spokesman for the Roman Catholic diocese in Bridgeport, Conn.

"The cross should be venerated, not eaten, nor tossed casually in an Easter basket beside the jelly beans and marshmallow Peeps," he said. "It's insulting."

"It's in poor taste," agreed the Rev. John Vakulskas, a Catholic priest in Alton, Iowa.

But the Rev. John Matusiak, of the Orthodox Church of America, could see how a cross in any form would carry more meaning than other Easter symbols. "Better for people to give a kid a cross instead of bunny," he said, "but it is kind of creepy to eat a cross."

Kansas City-based Russell Stover, the third-largest American chocolate manufacturer, said it is targeting some of the most devout Christians — Hispanic Americans.

Pangburn, which Russell Stover bought in 1999, has long had a hold in that market. The milk chocolate cross is about 6 inches high, adorned with a floral bouquet and filled with caramel made of goat's milk, popular in Mexico and Latin America. Its packaging features Spanish more prominently than English.

Russell Stover President Tom Ward doesn't expect the chocolate cross to overtake the chocolate bunny, but he does expect it to bring in new customers who "wouldn't buy rabbits."

"I think it's a market that's potentially overlooked," said chocolate expert Clay Gordon, who runs the chocolate Web site Chocophile.com.

Ward said Russell Stover considered making other traditional images out of chocolate but eventually opted not to.

"A molded Jesus, for example, would not be a good call and a cross with Jesus on it wouldn't be a good idea either," Ward said.

[jspchief]

I prefer to eat three chocolate sixes.

[Phobia]

I wouldn't dare eat a Chocolate Jesus, but I would eat a virgin Mary.

[Rausch]

**** 'em if they can't take a joke...

[Bob Dole]

**** 'em if they can't take a joke...

Chocolate is no joking matter, mister.

[Mr. Laz]

don't care much for chocolate, regardless of it's shape

[Hammock Parties]

****ing stupid just like the rest of the holiday.

[luv]

I took a stroll down the Easter isle at Wally World the other day, and I noticed the chocolate crosses. I didn't think anything of it though. It's a cross, not a crucifix. And chocolate is chocolate. These same people complaining probably ate the chocolate bunnies; first biting off his ears, then his head. . .just like the rest of us. How humane is that? And if there's a difference between eating animals and people, what about gingerbread men? I know I can't be the only one who bites their heads off first (even though I make them suffer sometimes by starting with the arms and legs). Anyhow. If they make it and it sells, good for the company. If it's a sin to eat a chocolate cross, that's gonna be on the heads of whoever is buying and selling. No one else has any right to judge.

[Bob Dole]

****ing stupid just like me.

Don't be so hard on yourself. It's most likely genetic.

[Hammock Parties]

Don't be so hard on yourself. It's most likely genetic.

Editing quotes is the weakest form of smack.

[teedubya]

Well as hard as people try to make Christmas about Santa, and Easter about the Easter Bunny, I think that Chocolate Crosses arent a bad idea.

[teedubya]

Editing quotes is the only kind of smack that I am good at.

Well, keep trying. You will get it some day bucko.

[Hammock Parties]

Well, keep trying. You will get it some day bucko.

My smack may not be top shelf, but I never stoop to the editing-quotes level.

[Rain Man]

I think the chocolate Jesus would be more popular if it came with a gooey raspberry center.

[Hammock Parties]

I think the chocolate Jesus would be more popular if it came with a gooey raspberry center.

1 Corinthians 11:23-26. For I have received of the Lord that which also I delivered unto you, That the Lord Jesus the same night in which he was betrayed took chocolate: And when he had given thanks, he brake it, and said, Take, eat: this is my body, which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of me. After the same manner also he took the raspberry filling, when he had supped, saying, This filling is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye slurp it, in remembrance of me. For as often as ye eat this chocolate, and lick up this filling, ye do show the Lord’s death till he come.

[C-Mac]

With all this ridiculous religious commerce, makes me wonder why Jesus just didnt throw those greedy salesman right out of the temple when he had a chance........oh wait he did.

[|Zach|]

1 Corinthians 11:23-26. For I have received of the Lord that which also I delivered unto you, That the Lord Jesus the same night in which he was betrayed took chocolate: And when he had given thanks, he brake it, and said, Take, eat: this is my body, which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of me. After the same manner also he took the raspberry filling, when he had supped, saying, This filling is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye slurp it, in remembrance of me. For as often as ye eat this chocolate, and lick up this filling, ye do show the Lord’s death till he come.
ROFL

[Hammock Parties]

I plan to eat a chocolate rifle on JFK's birthday, too.

ROFL

[Rain Man]

I poured a bag of M&Ms out on my desk a while back, and they landed in a pattern that looked just Jesus. I ate them, and now I can heal diabetics.

[luv]

1 Corinthians 11:23-26. For I have received of the Lord that which also I delivered unto you, That the Lord Jesus the same night in which he was betrayed took chocolate: And when he had given thanks, he brake it, and said, Take, eat: this is my body, which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of me. After the same manner also he took the raspberry filling, when he had supped, saying, This filling is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye slurp it, in remembrance of me. For as often as ye eat this chocolate, and lick up this filling, ye do show the Lord’s death till he come.


Okay, if whoever complained about eating chocolate crosses read this, they'd have you crucified. Wait a sec, then maybe someday we'd be eating a chocolate raspberry filled gochiefs for Easter instead. And I prefer strawberry filling myself.

If they thought eating chocolate crosses was a sin, wonder what they would think of changing th Word of God? :hmmm:

[Rain Man]

If they thought eating chocolate crosses was a sin, wonder what they would think of changing th Word of God? :hmmm:


I hear that you'll get beaten if you even mention the name of King James in church.

[luv]

I hear that you'll get beaten if you even mention the name of King James in church.


Wow. I guess I should never take my Bible to church.

[C-Mac]

Wow. I guess I should never take my Bible to church.

I think he was just reflecting back a few hundred years......

[RealSNR]

The people who made the chocolate are retarded. They're marketing the crosses to Christians... obviously. Do they seriously think the people they're marketing to WON'T find these offensive? Some of them won't, but a lot of them will.

[Bob Dole]

The people who made the chocolate are retarded. They're marketing the crosses to Christians... obviously. Do they seriously think the people they're marketing to WON'T find these offensive? Some of them won't, but a lot of them will.

They should have made a chocolate crescent moon and star.

[Dave Lane]

If you had to eat a jesus chocolate then is it hands and feet first?

Dave

[stevieray]

1 Corinthians 11:23-26. For I have received of the Lord that which also I delivered unto you, That the Lord Jesus the same night in which he was betrayed took chocolate: And when he had given thanks, he brake it, and said, Take, eat: this is my body, which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of me. After the same manner also he took the raspberry filling, when he had supped, saying, This filling is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye slurp it, in remembrance of me. For as often as ye eat this chocolate, and lick up this filling, ye do show the Lord’s death till he come.

This is exactly why you will never get laid.

[chiefs4me]

This is exactly why you will never get laid.




Well that.....and he has to leave his computer in able to meet someone.:rolleyes:

[Hammock Parties]

This is exactly why you will never get laid.

Because I enjoy making fun of scripture? Riiiiight. Those hardcore church wenches really put out, too.

[stevieray]

Because I enjoy making fun of scripture?

No, because you need to cutdown the celebration of Easter to feel good about yourself.

Women don't like insecure, still playing with toys momma's boys.

[Hammock Parties]

No, because you need to cutdown the celebration of Easter to feel good about yourself.

Women don't like insecure, still playing with toys momma's boys.

LOL

Cut it down? The humor was ripe for the taking...I believe you can STFU.

Could you not find your easter basket today?

[luv]

LOL

Cut it down? The humor was ripe for the taking...I believe you can STFU.

Could you not find your easter basket today?


Easter is tomorrow.

[stevieray]

[QUOTE=gochiefs]LOL

I believe you can STFU.
/QUOTE]

I believe you couldn't back this statement up if a bobba fett gang bang were at stake.

[Hammock Parties]

[QUOTE=gochiefs]LOL

I believe you can STFU.
/QUOTE]

I believe you couldn't back this statement up if a bobba fett gang bang were at stake.

Just **** off already. This site was better without you.

[4th and Long]

I believe you couldn't back this statement up if a bobba fett gang bang were at stake.
ROFL

[Darkwolfe]

Just **** off already. This site was better without you.


Uh, I wouldn't go down that road junior. You're not going to like the results.

[luv]

Just **** off already. This site was better without you.


Boys! Boys! Back to your corners!!

[Hammock Parties]

Uh, I wouldn't go down that road junior. You're not going to like the results.

Actually I'm going to love the results. Stevieray can get the **** off my internet. I should've done it along time ago.

[JazzzLovr]

This site was better without you.



irony n. For the most accurate definition, please see post #35.

[stevieray]

Just **** off already. This site was better without you.

ROFL

Start a poll, mommas boy.

If you lose, you leave.

[4th and Long]

ROFL

Start a poll, mommas boy.

If you lose, you leave.
And the gauntlet has been thrown dowm.

5 bucks says it never gets picked up.

[Darkwolfe]

ROFL

Start a poll, mommas boy.

If you lose, you leave.

Do it gochiefs, come on.. It'll be the best thing you've ever done for the board.

:thumb:

[Hammock Parties]

Stevieray doesn't exist as far as I'm concerned.

[JazzzLovr]

Stevieray doesn't exist as far as I'm concerned.

:shrug: Your loss.

[Hammock Parties]

:shrug: Your loss.

My gain.

[4th and Long]

Someone owes me 5 bucks! :cuss:

[stevieray]

Stevieray doesn't exist as far as I'm concerned.

I existed two years before you needed this board to define your life.

[Darkwolfe]

I existed two years before you needed this board to define your life.

gochiefs has a life???? :hmmm:

[PastorMikH]

This site was better without you.


Say, if you switch the speaker and recipient, this statement is quite true.


If Stevie left, the Coolness of the Planet would be cut in half.

[PastorMikH]

Originally Posted by gochiefs
Stevieray doesn't exist as far as I'm concerned.

I existed two years before you needed this board to define your life.



Just makin' sure Stevie is heard.

[stevieray]

gochiefs has a life???? :hmmm:

His parents would prolly kick him out if the planet didn't keep him out of their hair 18 hours of the day.

Though I will admit he's made progress from being a total dweeb. some of his football takes are pretty solid.

[4th and Long]

Hey stevie, I know you're popular and all, but you could at least clean out your PM box once in a while. It's hard to send "The King" fan mail otherwise. ;)

[Darkwolfe]

His parents would prolly kick him out if the planet didn't keep him out of their hair 18 hours of the day.

Though I will admit he's made progress from being a total dweeb. some of his football takes are pretty solid.


Guess he got promoted from dweeb to :lame:

I suppose if his football takes are ok then we'll have to let him be.

Poor kid.

[Hammock Parties]

I think you folks have misinterpreted my comments. I prefer the site sans Fall Down Elvis. I don't care what the rest of you prefer.

[PastorMikH]

Anyone else feel like we are watching Ralph Malph trying to get the best of Fonzie?

[Darkwolfe]

Anyone else feel like we are watching Ralph Malph trying to get the best of Fonzie?


Good one Mike. :thumb:

[stevieray]

I think you folks have misinterpreted my comments. I prefer the site sans Fall Down Elvis. I don't care what the rest of you prefer.


If you didn't care, why state they have misinterpreted them?

Face it, you can't handle the truth. You've posted your anti Easter comments on multiple threads, be a man when you get called out on it. Acknowledging you could wrong is very liberating, as opposed to saying someone can get off YOUR internet...

ROFL

[|Zach|]

No, because you need to cutdown the celebration of Easter to feel good about yourself.


Anyone else find this post to be funny? You have to think about it for a little while. ROFL

[Rausch]

The people who made the chocolate are retarded. They're marketing the crosses to Christians... obviously. Do they seriously think the people they're marketing to WON'T find these offensive? Some of them won't, but a lot of them will.

It's a chocolate cross. A piece of wood.

Funny how it's ok to make angel cookies on christmas but no crosses on easter. I guess angels have a better sense of humor.

[Bowser]

I really hope I wouldn't be the only one to be amused if the Chocolate Jesus thread ended up in the Romper Room.



Man, lots of tension on the Planet, lately. We need to sign Surtain, ASAP!

[|Zach|]

I really hope I wouldn't be the only one to be amused if the Chocolate Jesus thread ended up in the Romper Room.



Man, lots of tension on the Planet, lately. We need to sign Surtain, ASAP!
We need to throw a party...

http://www.amcwholesaleinc.com/image/detail_866.jpg

[Rausch]

I really hope I wouldn't be the only one to be amused if the Chocolate Jesus thread ended up in the Romper Room.



Man, lots of tension on the Planet, lately. We need to sign Surtain, ASAP!

I've been making gingerbread Bartee's for weeks, and biting their heads off...

[|Zach|]

I've been making gingerbread Bartee's for weeks, and biting their heads off...
ROFL

[Bob Dole]

Funny.

Nobody really complained when Depeche Mode came out with the song.

Your own chocolate Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own chocolate Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who’s there

[Bowser]

We need to throw a party...

http://www.amcwholesaleinc.com/image/detail_866.jpg

Ooooh! I get first swing at that sumbitch!

I've been making gingerbread Bartee's for weeks, and biting their heads off...

ROFL

You any good with the voodoo doll, by chance?

[Rausch]

ROFL

You any good with the voodoo doll, by chance?

Did you see what happened to Howard Dean?... :)

[JazzzLovr]

Did you see what happened to Howard Dean?... :)

ROFL

[stevieray]

Funny.

Nobody really complained when Depeche Mode came out with the song.

Your own chocolate Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own chocolate Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who’s there

people are people
so why should it be
We should make Jesus chocalatety?

[Rausch]

people are people
so why should it be
We should make Jesus chocalatety?

Let me make sure I understand this: people are getting angry because christians will be eating the body of Christ?

:spock:

[Hammock Parties]

Let me make sure I understand this: people are getting angry because christians will be eating the body of Christ?

:spock:

ROFL

[stevieray]

Let me make sure I understand this: people are getting angry because christians will be eating the body of Christ?

:spock:

I don't think a cross is the same as receiving communion.

[Rausch]

I don't think a cross is the same as receiving communion.

Hey, they could have a priest bless it and BAM! All good!

:D

[C-Mac]

Surprised no one has tossed this one in......

"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image,
or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth" -Exodus 20:4

[Jenny Gump]

Surprised no one has tossed this one in......

"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image,
or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth" -Exodus 20:4

You have a lot of nerve bringing religion into this thread. WE are talking about chocolate!

[keg in kc]

What, Jen? Chocolate isn't religion? Speak for yourself. The power of chocolate is the only thing I believe in.

[Jenny Gump]

What, Jen? Chocolate isn't religion? Speak for yourself. The power of chocolate is the only thing I believe in.

Chocolate definitely heals the soul sometimes. You may have a point.

[4th and Long]

Chocolate definitely heals the soul sometimes.
It also appears to have a profound psychological impact on the female of the species.

[C-Mac]

Chocolate definitely heals the soul sometimes. You may have a point.

I heard on the news a couple a months ago that a group of researchers claimed that chocolate helps a woman during her monthly cycle.

I would like to know how much the chocolate organizations paid out on that one.
:D

[Chiefs Pantalones]

"Would you buy one?"


Wouldn't that be slavery?

[Dave Lane]

Surprised no one has tossed this one in......

"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image,
or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth" -Exodus 20:4

Crap and I just bought some Swedish Fish.

Dave

[C-Mac]

Crap and I just bought some Swedish Fish.

Dave

Well as long as you dont all of a sudden feel the urge to start worshipping them or using them to enhance your next religious expierence....you should be good to go!

[Dave Lane]

Well as long as you dont all of a sudden feel the urge to start worshipping them or using them to enhance your next religious expierence....you should be good to go!

Well if I like them a whole lot and like hum religious songs while I eat them will I still be OK?

Dave

[C-Mac]

Well if I like them a whole lot and like hum religious songs while I eat them will I still be OK?

Dave

OK for what?........and what the heck kind of fish makes you want to hum religious songs while you eat them?

[KS Smitty]

OK for what?........and what the heck kind of fish makes you want to hum religious songs while you eat them?

Angel fish????

[C-Mac]

Angel fish????

Clever........you sinner!

[KS Smitty]

Clever........you sinner!

ROFL Me= :evil: :)