T or F? CHEATERS WILL ALWAYS CHEAT.

[el borracho]

Saw this quote in another post and wondered if everyone agrees: "CHEATERS WILL ALWAYS CHEAT. THAT'S WHAT THEY DO. THAT'S WHY WE CALL THEM "CHEATERS". BECAUSE THEY CHEAT."

If the above is absolutely true, that means that anyone who has ever cheated in a relationship is sure to cheat again. While in principle this may sound logical, I would think there are many people who have cheated at some point in their life and gone on later to have faithfull relationships. Do people not learn from their experiences? I would guess that many happily married people have cheated in past relationships. Is this not true?

By the way, I would recommend against taking a cheater back because I do think people learn from their experiences. Don't cheaters learn that cheating has consequences if their actions cost them something that they later regret? That is one of the reasons I would always recommend behaving oneself, even when things turn sour- the cheater will later regret losing a good person more than they would regret losing someone who behaved like a jackass at the end.

[Demonpenz]

winners never cheat and cheaters never win, and if you never cheat or never win then your ****ed

[Hammock Parties]

Winners often cheat.

[el borracho]

Demonpenz and Gochiefs cheated!! They posted replies before the poll was completed!

[Demonpenz]

Cheaters may win the game, but they lose at life

[el borracho]

Cheaters may win the game, but they lose at life
You should know- CHEATER!

[Hammock Parties]

Demonpenz and Gochiefs cheated!! They posted replies before the poll was completed!

That's not cheating, that's being a rebel.

[Demonpenz]

i used an unfair advantage in college, but i had to keep up with those damn white people

[cowboy_big_rich]

reminds me of High School

Used to just put a straight line with an incoherent line on T/F questions if I didn't know and then try to convince the teacher I had the right answer.


heh heh

Never did work out for me much

[Demonpenz]

sometimes it's just crafty

[Calcountry]

winners never cheat and cheaters never win, and if you never cheat or never win then your ****edTell that to the Denver Broncos

[Frazod]

True. Cheaters cheat. It's in their nature, and nature cannot be changed. The lesson to be learned is not to get mixed up with them in the first place or to cut your losses after they've f#cked you over.

[Demonpenz]

Sometimes cheaters are loved. Gaylord perry

[Bob Dole]

Bob Dole's personal experience is that the statement is true.

[KCWolfman]

As usual, the poll leaves a great deal to be desired.

Cheating? How? A 16 year old who sweetheart promises to another and then breaks that promise isn't exactly the necessity to be a cheating spouse. But I find that if you don't take your vows of marriage seriously with one person, you probably never will.

[Mr. Kotter]

Bronco fans...can you please weigh in on this??? :p

[Mr. Kotter]

Tell that to the Denver Broncos"

Heh, great minds... :p

[Rain Man]

In romance, I think that people who cheat once will cheat again.

The lone exception to my "Cheaters always cheat" recognition is that I can see someone who's a non-cheater having a moment of weakness and making a one-time, one-night mistake. But that's the only exception.

[Phobia]

As usual, the poll leaves a great deal to be desired.

Cheating? How? A 16 year old who sweetheart promises to another and then breaks that promise isn't exactly the necessity to be a cheating spouse. But I find that if you don't take your vows of marriage seriously with one person, you probably never will.

That's my vote. My personal experience tells me that cheaters always cheat. When I met my ex-wife, unbeknownst to me she was supposedly engaged to some other dude. Then I did him a favor. She cheated on me repeatedly before I finally gave her the boot (don't stay in hell for the kids). I'm 100% certain she'll repeat the cycle with her current husband. And I'll call him and laugh and laugh and laugh.

But, I'm sure there are those reformed cheaters out there and possibly even amongst us.

[Phobia]

"

Heh, great minds... :p

Think much faster than slow minds.

[Sure-Oz]

most likely, always a risk i guess.

[Bob Dole]

"

Heh, great minds... :p

Are never present around this place.

[Mr. Kotter]

Are never present around this place.

Not true; we just save our wisdom for when you aren't around....and type in code, and have not given you the handy-dandy decoder ring. :harumph:

[Mr. Kotter]

Think much faster than slow minds.

Hey...I'm don't have ESP, and I don't always read the entire thread before I respond. Are you takin' lessons from Jim tonight? Heh.

Gotta admit, it's more fun to be mostly "observing" in those kinds of threads anymore...heh.

[KCWolfman]

I am also curious as to how many that have voted "false" have had their own indiscretions.

[Mr. Kotter]

I am also curious as to how many that have voted "false" have had their own indiscretions.

I've had a few, but the key for me...you learn from your mistakes...I've done that. I can't even remember the last time (in real life, heh).....seriously.

[KCWolfman]

I've had a few, but the key for me...you learn from your mistakes...I've done that. I can't even remember the last time (in real life, heh).....seriously.
A few means more than once.

Would you forgive your wife is she said "hey, I had an indiscretion, but I learned from my mistake?". After the first time, I learned my answer is "no".

[el borracho]

As usual, the poll leaves a great deal to be desired.

Cheating? How? A 16 year old who sweetheart promises to another and then breaks that promise isn't exactly the necessity to be a cheating spouse. But I find that if you don't take your vows of marriage seriously with one person, you probably never will.
Rain Man, I am not. :deevee:

If you want to refrain from voting while offering detailed info in a post, feel free.

[Spott]

As far as relationships go, cheaters will always cheat again.

[el borracho]

Cheating? How? A 16 year old who sweetheart promises to another and then breaks that promise isn't exactly the necessity to be a cheating spouse. But I find that if you don't take your vows of marriage seriously with one person, you probably never will.
By the way, my definition of cheating would include both scenarios you mention. In my mind, breach of commitment on any level = cheating.

[el borracho]

I am also curious as to how many that have voted "false" have had their own indiscretions.
I voted false and have never cheated in a relationship.

[Spott]

I am also curious as to how many that have voted "false" have had their own indiscretions.

The people that voted false just haven't caught the cheater cheating again.

[KCWolfman]

Rain Man, I am not. :deevee:

If you want to refrain from voting while offering detailed info in a post, feel free.
Sorry, not intended as a slam. I just think that many people would take the question in a variety of ways.

There are varying degrees of cheating and what is truly serious cheating.

A girl who decides to hold hands with another boy in the fourth grade is radically different from a 21 year old husband who screws around a week after he is married.

[J Diddy]

Sorry, not intended as a slam. I just think that many people would take the question in a variety of ways.

There are varying degrees of cheating and what is truly serious cheating.

A girl who decides to hold hands with another boy in the fourth grade is radically different from a 21 year old husband who screws around a week after he is married.



Um what about a week before the wedding....

[Mr. Kotter]

A few means more than once.

Would you forgive your wife is she said "hey, I had an indiscretion, but I learned from my mistake?". After the first time, I learned my answer is "no".

It was childhood and very early adulthood for me; not sayin' it was right....but like I said, I can't remember the last time...been at least 20 years.... :hmmm:

Would I forgive my wife; depends on circumstances but as a middle aged adult it would be harder...

[KCWolfman]

Um what about a week before the wedding....
I guess if it doesn't bother you that your future wife would do so, it shouldn't bother you that you should do so.

Personally, if it is a traditional wedding with a real engagement, IMO it is still screwing around.

[KCWolfman]

It was childhood and very early adulthood for me; not sayin' it was right....but like I said, I can't remember the last time...been at least 20 years.... :hmmm:
Very cool you are honest about it and learned. But as I stated, you did it more than once, therefore, you didn't learn right away.

[Chiefs Pantalones]

Once a cheater, always a cheater, IMO. Because you rarely find a girl that WANTS to change, but they are out there.

But guys don't cheat though. If you have sex with another girl, you were just finding something to do with your time that you were apart from her. And she's not to be concerned, because it was just sex, it's not like you were going to start a relationship with that other woman. If you get caught, explain, say it was just sexual, she'll understand.

[Mr. Kotter]

Very cool you are honest about it and learned. But as I stated, you did it more than once, therefore, you didn't learn right away.

True. Where I grew up, it's amazing I learned it at all... :shake:

[KCWolfman]

True. Where I grew up, it's amazing I learned it at all... :shake:
That is another interesting aspect. I wonder how many people who do cheat on their spouses are from environments where their parents did the same?

[Mr. Kotter]

It was childhood and very early adulthood for me; not sayin' it was right....but like I said, I can't remember the last time...been at least 20 years.... :hmmm:

Would I forgive my wife; depends on circumstances but as a middle aged adult it would be harder...

Holy shit....I just realized this thread is only about infidelity.... ROFL

I was thinkin' cheating in games, on a test, on homework....heh. :doh!:

As for indiscretions with wife, never. With "steady girlfriends"....early yes; after 19-20 yrs old, no.

Guess I better read the thread more carefully next time....heh. ROFL

[Mr. Kotter]

That is another interesting aspect. I wonder how many people who do cheat on their spouses are from environments where their parents did the same?

Very high, according to the studies I've seen.

[KCWolfman]

Holy shit....I just realized this thread is only about infidelity.... ROFL

I was thinkin' cheating in games, on a test, on homework....heh. :doh!:

As for indiscretions with wife, never. With "steady girlfriends"....early yes; after 19-20 yrs old, no.

Guess I better read the thread more carefully next time....heh. ROFL
LMAO

[Chiefs Pantalones]

I think cheaters can change, but I wouldn't put money on it. If I know of a girl that has cheated on someone before, I stay the heck away from her.

I know you should give girls second chances, but if you're dating a girl that you know has cheated on guys in the past, no matter what, there is always a little doubt in the back of your mind that says she's f$cking the pool man.

[KCWolfman]

I think cheaters can change, but I wouldn't put money on it. If I know of a girl that has cheated on someone before, I stay the heck away from her.

I know you should give girls second chances, but if you're dating a girl that you know has cheated on guys in the past, no matter what, there is always a little doubt in the back of your mind that says she's f$cking the pool man.
You are the pool man.

[Mr. Kotter]

....she's f$cking the pool man.

Let's leave chiefs4me out of this....okay? :p

[keg in kc]

Do I need to vote. I mean, it was my quote, after all.

I'll explain. I do think past experience shapes future behavior. I do not, however, believe that people who cheat will change, at least not on their own, because I believe that in the great majority of cases, their pattern of behavior is the result of a serious psychological problem. And the only way to fix that - if it can be fixed - is through professional counseling or therapy. Which means that person is going to have to first recognize that their behavior is a problem, then admit that they need help and then choose to change.

Now, I should clarify that I'm talking about serious relationships here, whether it's adulterous behavior or someone who cheats in the middle of a long term relationship. I'm not talking about someone who had a fling behind the back of his/her high school sweetheart or had an indiscretion or two in college or their twenties. I'm talking about the kind of person in the previous thread who had an established, obvious pattern of behavior. She'd committed adultery with the individual previously, then left her fiance for him. That marks her as a lost cause in my book.

But, hey, I'm not a forgiving guy. I was once. I'm not now. I wouldn't even welcome someone back if they tried therapy and came crawling back. Fidelity, to me, is a cornerstone of a relationship, and I'm as loyal a person as you'll find. You break that committment, with me, and you're done. End of story.

[Chiefs Pantalones]

ROFL

Nah, Russ, before anything, I always make sure she doesn't have a boyfriend before asking a girl out. I don't want to be the cause of something so bad as a break up, or a homewrecker or whatever, if I could. If she says she has a boyfriend, I just say, ah no prob, then walk away. Some people get off on going after other guy's women, that's not me. I just don't think it's right.

[Frazod]

I'd say it's pretty much accurate.

I've cheated on a gal once. I don't see myself turning into a chronic cheater, though. I remember when I was just about to get down to business, as it were, thinking about the fact that by taking that action I was ending my relationship. I ended things immediately upon my return to Phoenix. I suppose I coulda busted out my cellphone right before we hopped into bed, called up the gf, and ended things right then... and dodged the label of cheater. But, oh well... guess I'll just have to be tainted. I think that might've screwed up the mood a bit, too.

I don't have what it takes to carry on a lie like that. Plus, I just don't get the motivation. If you wanna f*ck around... f*ck around. You wanna be with one person, do that. The two lifestyles just don't mesh in my head. Maybe I'm weird.

Course, what may prevent me from ever cheating again is just not ever being in a serious relationship again. Come to think of it... I haven't had anything closely resembling a relationship w/ a gal since that incident... that was just a couple months shy of two years ago.

I had a college gf that I'm pretty sure has cheated on anyone she's ever been with. It's actually kinda funny to watch the behavior repeat itself. I remember my last semester of college, long after she and I had been an item, she was cheating on her boyfriend at the time (let's call him Joe) with me. (Hey, a guy's gotta get laid. :)). Eventually her and "Joe" break up. I'm told that after I graduated, she started dating a new guy ("Bob", let's say). Apparently, she cheated on Bob with Joe. Heh, so I guess the lesson to learn is, if you're dating that gal... and any of her exes live in the same town as y'all... that's who she's f*cking behind your back.
I never cheated on my ex-wife until after I found out she had cheated on me (with one of my best friends, among others). We initially split, then foolishly got back together. While we were split, she enrolled at MU and I was stationed at Great Lakes. I assumed that she was still unfaithful, but at that point it didn't matter, because I didn't give a shit. I didn't f#ck around a lot, but I certainly didn't lose any sleep over it when I did.

After a year of continuing the sham of a dead marriage with a woman I no longer really cared about and certainly didn't trust or respect, and driving from Chicago to Columbia every other weekend, I'd had enough (and so had my car). She was all set to move up here, and I told her not to bother.

Never cheated on anyone else - be it various girlfriends or my current wife. At this point, I've pretty much got an Al Bundy philosophy on women - one's plenty. :D

[Chiefs Pantalones]

These numbers are from a couple years ago, because that's when I took this class, but if I remember correctly, as of that year, 90% of women stay faithful, and 75% of men stayed faithful, in marriage. I don't think those numbers are correct though, but I do remember the women being 90%, but not sure about the men.

[BIG_DADDY]

Always no. A great majority of the time, yes. Move on. Great for a fling, not a relationship.

[Chiefs Pantalones]

Yeah, and I've got a 13 inch cock, too.

I'll look for the notebook tomorrow, and if the numbers happen to be correct, you're probably gonna have a KCENDelt260'scockStalker with that statement. ROFL :p

[Simplex3]

If we go with the 90-10 rule and say that 90% of cheaters being serial cheaters constitutes "All", then yes. The ability to cheat in a serious relationship past 18-20 years old (teenagers don't have serious commitments to anything but their genitalia) is a character trait and those rarely change.

Now, in Brando's case, where the other guy the bitch was f**king was married, she is 100% destined to f**k around again. She has absolutely no respect of relationships at all, hers or anyone else's.

[Phobia]

Holy shit....I just realized this thread is only about infidelity.... ROFL

I was thinkin' cheating in games, on a test, on homework....heh. :doh!:

As for indiscretions with wife, never. With "steady girlfriends"....early yes; after 19-20 yrs old, no.

Guess I better read the thread more carefully next time....heh. ROFL

Translation - "The wife is looking over my shoulder now"

[BIG_DADDY]

Now, in Brando's case, where the other guy the bitch was f**king was married, she is 100% destined to f**k around again. She has absolutely no respect of relationships at all, hers or anyone else's.

Very few people have respect for other people's relationships especially when the other person is hot, willing and ready to rock.

[Earthling]

All I know is what Mama taught me; if you are keeping score and lose, then you deserve to lose.

[Simplex3]

All I know is what Mama taught me; if you are keeping score and lose, then you deserve to lose.
Yeah, but if you don't keep score the other person will always tell you that you lost.

[Earthling]

Yeah, but if you don't keep score the other person will always tell you that you lost.

We must be related.

[jcroft]

In my experience, it's ALMOST true. Almost all of the cheaters I know have never changed, and probably never will. However, I do know one or two people who used to cheat and have managed to stop.

In general, I think it's true that cheaters will always cheat, but there are a few exceptions.

[Slayer Diablo]

False. Although a lot of cheaters do continue their pattern, there are almost as many times when cheating is understandable and a person would only do it for that time. For example, if you're being taught by someone who has absolutely no idea what they're doing and you're not planning to take classes or a career involving the topic, then sure...after all, there's no point in paying for a tutor or something like that when you absolutely know that you won't need the class. Does this mean everyone who does this is going to cheat their way through other classes? Absolutely not.

[Mr. Kotter]

Hahahaha... when I saw Slayer had the last post on a relationship topic I knew it was going to be rich... but, I had no idea he wouldn't even realize it was a relationship topic.

Hey, I made the same mistake. :harumph:

[Slayer Diablo]

Hahahaha... when I saw Slayer had the last post on a relationship topic I knew it was going to be rich... but, I had no idea he wouldn't even realize it was a relationship topic.

Damnit! :doh!: I admit to only reading the title and first sentence.

Alright, so for the REAL topic at hand, my answer is TRUE (btw, could a mod please change my vote to reflect that?) simply because there's no reason for cheating in a relationship even once. Once that becomes part of what someone does, they're not gonna go completely away from it for the rest of their lives unless they get hit by a car pretty soon after the first time. This is why rehibilitation didn't work for murderers when clinics were made specifically for that reason.

[Ebolapox]

technically, the act of cheating makes on a cheater... so once again, per the phrase, 'cheaters' always 'cheat', as the act of 'cheating' makes one a 'cheater'

-EB-:spock:

[badgirl]

I don't beleive its always true, the reason being, someone may be with someone and fall out of love, for several reasons, their relationship goes down the drain and they cheat, maby their partner was a bitch or bastard and abusive, mentally or physically and then someone comes along who is really nice to them, and it happens.

Then later on in years they meet someone who they truely love and although there are problems, they may be nothing like in their earlier relationship and don't cheat.

I beleive maturing has a lot to do with being a cheater, if a guy is say 20 he may still be a little wild, but later on in years when he has been married to someone he really loves and has a family with, becomes say 40, he has probably matured throughout his years and may never cheat on his spouse.

I think cheaters also learn by their mistakes when they lose their family and its too late to go back and change things, and then when they do find the person they truely love, they stay faithful. IMO

[Simplex3]

I beleive maturing has a lot to do with being a cheater, if a guy is say 20 he may still be a little wild, but later on in years when he has been married to someone he really loves and has a family with, becomes say 40, he has probably matured throughout his years and may never cheat on his spouse.
Cheaters typically quit cheating at 40 because they can no longer get quality pu**y.

IMO.

[Mr. Kotter]

Cheaters typically quit cheating at 40 because they can no longer get quality pu**y.

IMO.

You must not be any where close to 40 yrs old.... :shake:

[Frazod]

I personally think there are a shitload of cheaters on here skewing the poll. :hmmm:

[Mr. Kotter]

I personally think there are a shitload of cheaters on here skewing the poll. :hmmm:

Yeah, it's kinda like Jr HS and HS...."I fugged so-and-so this weekend" BS that was much more fiction than truth.

That and a lot of the "non-cheater" types haven't even clicked on this thread...

[stevieray]

I think it's true with infidelity and of course, the Invescos.

[Slayer Diablo]

I don't beleive its always true, the reason being, someone may be with someone and fall out of love, for several reasons, their relationship goes down the drain and they cheat, maby their partner was a bitch or bastard and abusive, mentally or physically and then someone comes along who is really nice to them, and it happens.

Then later on in years they meet someone who they truely love and although there are problems, they may be nothing like in their earlier relationship and don't cheat.

I beleive maturing has a lot to do with being a cheater, if a guy is say 20 he may still be a little wild, but later on in years when he has been married to someone he really loves and has a family with, becomes say 40, he has probably matured throughout his years and may never cheat on his spouse.

I think cheaters also learn by their mistakes when they lose their family and its too late to go back and change things, and then when they do find the person they truely love, they stay faithful. IMO

If everyone went by that method, everyone would cheat on everyone with everyone else...sounds kinda like how the 60's & 70's are portrayed today.

There's no reason for anyone to cheat...if it a relationship with an abuser, they should leave; if it's a stalker, we have laws to protect the person who's being stalked; if the person goes into a stroke and the doctors don't think they'll come out of it, either: wait until they come out of it to break up, divorce right away if married, or leave a note that says "Sorry, I don't think it's going to work." Basically, it just comes down to a person taking responsibility for their own actions.