Feral cats and stupid bitches

[ENDelt260]

.

[Saulbadguy]

Haha. UP go your dues! How do you think they will pay for the fixing?

[Saulbadguy]

We used to have alot of feral cats on our property (also a condo), but they found out people were leaving food out for them. There was a law passed (from our HOA) saying you would get a $50 fine if they caught you doing it.

Haven't seen a cat since. I bet some of your neighbors are leaving food out.

[Donger]

I think it's be cool to have a critter like The Feral Kid from The Road Warrior running around.

[siberian khatru]

I preferred your old threads about feral bitches and stupid cats.

[Saulbadguy]

All the cats did was keep other, smaller pests away. I never really saw the harm in keeping them around. The only thing that annoyed people was the paw prints on their cars.

[Katipan]

F*ck yeah they are. The f*cking notice acknolwedges that. Asks people not to leave any food out for a couple days before the put out the traps so the cats will be hungry and go for the bait.

I'm seriously just..... argh. Beyond words. The next woman I see is getting slapped really, really hard. For all of her gender.

Not it!

[Donger]

Just poison the bait in the traps.

[siberian khatru]

Just poison the bait in the traps.

Wait, are we talking about the cats or the bitches?

[Katipan]

You're excluded. You bring me beer and food, and have never suggested I feed a stray cat cause he's too f*cking cute to kill.

Plus... you'd shoot me.

...sounds like I'm already feeding a stray cat.

Can I bring you home and keep you?

[Boozer]

Prestone.

[Boozer]

Also, nothing stops you from getting your own traps and taking care of business yourself. Or taking them into the humane society. In fact, if you see a "full" trap, grab that sucker yourself, take it to the HS (or the canal).

[Katipan]

Will you bathe me and keep my nails clipped?

I promise not to neuter you.

[Boozer]

Yes something does. My extreme laziness.

Swing by WalMart and pick up an air rifle.

[Katipan]

Your fingers are crossed, aren't they?

I promise not to unless you really really deserve it.

[Saulbadguy]

Must all threads degenerate in to this madness?

[Donger]

Wait, are we talking about the cats or the bitches?

Can you poison money?

[Coach]

Must all threads degenerate in to this madness?

It's Chiefsplanet. It's to be expected.

[morphius]

Just guessing that if there are that many cats running around, its probably helping to keep a rodent population down. Just a guess though.

[Donger]

Can you poison money?

Actually, that's incorrect. If'n we were trying to poison the bitches, we'd need to poison THEIR bait.

So, who knows how to poison a pussy?

[Psyko Tek]

Actually, that's incorrect. If'n we were trying to poison the bitches, we'd need to poison THEIR bait.

So, who knows how to poison a pussy?


yoou marry it

[Boozer]

Then I'll have to find someone to fire it. I might have trouble hitting my truck while it was parked. I don't think I could nail a moving cat.

Practice makes perfect.

Or you may want to opt for the flamethrower. HOA will love that.

[morphius]

Can't the domestic pussy handle that? And the dogs?
But the domestic cat would most likely do that inside, these catch them while they are still outside.

[Katipan]

Come to my house and fondle my air rifle.

or is it an air glock?

whatever.

[morphius]

Damnit, morph. If all you're gonna do is talk logic, stay the hell out of my threads.

This is a place for aimless ranting and light sexual innuendo.
Ummm. I think one of those cats saw who stole your tail gate, you should take them all out!

[morphius]

I knew it!
The worst part is he told the others and now they just laugh at you whenever they see you outside.

[Donger]

I'm probably the only person on this board that has visions of multiple Puss N' Boots from Shrek 2 in my head after reading this thread.

[Raiderhater]

I'm probably the only person on this board that has visions of multiple Puss N' Boots from Shrek 2 in my head after reading this thread.


Probably.

[Donger]

Probably.

Hey. It's a GREAT f*cking movie. Plus, I get to fantasize about humping Cameron Diaz as a large, green monster.

[Katipan]

Are you the monster, or is she?

[Donger]

Are you the monster, or is she?

What do you think I am? A freak?

Of course she's the monster.

[chiefs4me]

Are you the monster, or is she?








ROFL.......ouch

[Donger]

ROFL.......ouch

Ouch?

[Katipan]

Ouch?

Let's face it. Shrek has to be packing.

[Donger]

Let's face it. Shrek has to be packing.

Right, right. I forgot with whom I was speaking for a second.

[Raiderhater]

Hey. It's a GREAT f*cking movie. Plus, I get to fantasize about humping Cameron Diaz as a large, green monster.



Uhm.....

[Donger]

Awesome. Leave it to Donger to take this thread up a notch. Animated green monster sex. That's hot.

You've never seen Shrek 2, let alone 1.

[Donger]

I saw the first Shrek. On a date. At the dollar theater.

Good lord. You're a pedophile, too?

[Boozer]

Good lord. You're a pedophile, too?

Looking for like-minded friends?

[Donger]

Looking for like-minded friends?

Just trying to ascertain what kind of "dates" Endelt would take to see Shrek.

[PastorMikH]

Here you go END, I’ll help you write a letter. Feel free to copy/paste this as your own and send to the local Humane Society and/or the animal control department of your local police department if you want.

Dear Sir,

I am writing you in regards to some feral cats we have in our neighborhood. These cats have been a nuisance for some time. They get into the trash, climb up on cars and scratch the paint, disturb the peace at night with their fighting and so on. Some of the other neighbors have a plan that includes catching, spaying/neutering these cats then turning them back loose to run wild throughout our neighborhood. Here is the note I found at my mailbox…

There are currently five feral cats running around our property. On such-and-such date, we're gonna capture them in traps we got from the humane society...
...they WILL NOT be destroyed
"...instead, they will be spayed/neutered and released back on to the property...
(You might want to type the rest of the note)

To me this sounds ridiculous! These 5 cats are a nuisance as well as possible carriers of disease, why would we want to turn them loose again? All that has happened is the assurance that these cats won’t reproduce. Furthermore, it is my understanding that cats have to have shots every year, which means these cats will have to be trapped every year. Add in my question concerning care, wouldn’t it be considered neglect if proper care isn’t given these cats once such ownership is assumed? I would prefer you step in concerning the matter of these feral cats, see to it they are taken care of properly. If they can be taken care of, let them be placed for adoption. If not, I feel the humane approach is better than being injured due to traffic and other animals.

Sincerely,


I thought about adding this: "There were 6 cats until last summer. One of them hoped in my buddy’s truck and drove it to Mexico. We never saw the cat or the truck again."

[Katipan]

He taught my daughter to say "**** face"...

The evidence speaks volumes.

[PastorMikH]

Swing by WalMart and pick up an air rifle.


They probably have a couple of managers that could provide pointers about shooting the cats as well.

[Boozer]

I thought about adding this: "There were 6 cats until last summer. One of them hoped in my buddy’s truck and drove it to Mexico. We never saw the cat or the truck again."

If only Phil hadn't hired day laborer cats at the Home Depot to work on Brian's deck.

[Donger]

He taught my daughter to say "**** face"...

The evidence speaks volumes.

Heh. My four-year old boy recently told the deli guy at the grocery store to "stop being a f*cking idiot." My wife was NOT amused.

[PastorMikH]

If only Phil hadn't hired day laborer cats at the Home Depot to work on Brian's deck.


ROFL ROFL

[morphius]

why is it that I never have the video camera on when I need it. I just got to watch our Lab fall down about 6 steps and land with a great face plant. Classic moment.

[Skip Towne]

why is it that I never have the video camera on when I need it. I just got to watch our Lab fall down about 6 steps and land with a great face plant. Classic moment.
Brian Griese's dog no doubt.

[Donger]

Too?

Heh. Yes, that does sound rather disturbing, doesn't it.

"Too" as in "that and fat chicks?"

Bad joke.

[Boozer]

It was her idea. She was 24 at the time, IIRC. That was four or five years ago.

Was that Melekalikimaka...Melahamia?

[jspchief]

GBlowfish is soo going to call the SPCA on all your asses.

[Jenny Gump]

Feral cats and stupid bitches.


Yes????

[morphius]

Which are you answering to?
Yup, a labrynth...

sheesh.

[morphius]

I think I've had just about enough of your lip for one day.
Damn, when was the last time anyone heard End say that he has had enough of anything?

[Hammock Parties]

Get your lawnmower out...

[Katipan]

Damn, when was the last time anyone heard End say that he has had enough of anything?

Food, beer and pot all the time.

[morphius]

Food, beer and pot all the time.
You are not really helping here, you know that don't you?

[Katipan]

I have never told you I had enough beer.

Liar, ONE time I didn't take you home.

You said enough that night.

[Katipan]

You are not really helping here, you know that don't you?

Have any stubble yet, hun?

[morphius]

Have any stubble yet, hun?
A girl in HS told me she wished she had my eyes so that people wouldn't look at the rest of her. I'm going to stick with that for my goat.

[Katipan]

A girl in HS told me she wished she had my eyes so that people wouldn't look at the rest of her. I'm going to stick with that for my goat.

Who cares about eye color when the lights are low?

Priorities, baby.

[morphius]

Who cares about eye color when the lights are low?

Priorities, baby.
No diagram for you...

[Katipan]

No diagram for you...

Awww I was just trying to get you to grow a goat.

I wanna see what the lesbian got.