Pencil in penis backfires

[Hammock Parties]

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1722414.html?menu=news.quirkies

Pencil in penis backfires

A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex.

Zeljko Tupic, from Belgrade, told doctors he had experienced erectile difficulties in the past.

So as he prepared for a night with his new lover, he decided to insert a thin pencil into his penis.

Tupic had to cut his sex session short when the pencil shifted and became lodged in his bladder, forcing him to call an ambulance, the daily Kurir reported.

Doctor Aleksandar Milosevic from Belgrade's Zvezdara hospital, who succesfully removed the pencil, said: "At first the patient did not tell us what really happened, but x-rays proved the truth.

"Tupic said he had no idea there were things like Viagra available but agreed that in future he will try pills before he takes any more chances with pencils."

[Pierce]

Ouch.

[cdcox]

Tupic... toothpick... heh, heh.

[Simplex3]

At no time have I ever even considered the possibility of putting anything IN my d**k. This guy is an idiot.

[mike_b_284]

Ouch.


Captain Obvious

[Smed1065]

I just would have to start licking her if I could not get it up, he-l no pencil no way!

I feel sick to my stomach or should I say bladder now. :)

[plbrdude]

that whole story reeks of unnaturalness.

[JBucc]

Tying the pencil to your dick I could understand...

[Nzoner]

That gives new meaning to get the Led out.

[beavis]

There's a short story by Chuck Palahniuk about a similar situation. I think it was called guts if I remember correctly. Apparently, this isn't unheard of in other cultures.

[KChiefsQT]

I just got the chills and I don't even have a penis. Who posts this shit anyways???? :shake:

[JBucc]

Who else

[HolmeZz]

Atleast he didn't try to sharpen it.

[4th and Long]

This guy either had a huge urethra or one really small pencil.

[Hammock Parties]

This guy either had a huge urethra or one really small pencil.

I am curious about the length of his member, unless he shortened the pencil somehow.

[HolmeZz]

I've gotta stop opening this topic. My dick's starting to hurt.

[4th and Long]

I am curious about the length of his member, unless he shortened the pencil somehow.
Be more concerned about the circumference of the pencil.

*cringing*

[Nzoner]

I am curious about the length of his member

Well color me shocked

[Phobia]

Well, there goes my plans for valentines day. Any other ideas?

[Rain Man]

If this happened in America, all of our pencils would soon come with a warning on the side. "WARNING: INSERTING PENCIL INTO YOUR PENIS MAY CAUSE INJURY."

[KChiefsQT]

I am curious about the length of his member, unless he shortened the pencil somehow.
oh wow. This keeps getting wierder.

[4th and Long]

Well, there goes my plans for valentines day. Any other ideas?
Fret not. Just purchase one of those oversized pencil eraser that slip over the end of the pencil. Insert that end first. No way in hell will it slip into your baldder.

You're welcome.

[Hammock Parties]

Well, there goes my plans for valentines day. Any other ideas?

Get your missus to show you how to insert some tables into word.

[Simplex3]

Well, there goes my plans for valentines day. Any other ideas?
Grab a glass rod and a hammer.

[KChiefsQT]

How are you men with dicks reading this shit? My body is crawling all over.

[4th and Long]

How are you men with dicks reading this shit? My body is crawling all over.
Ever been kicked in the nuts?

Nuff said.

[Hammock Parties]

How are you men with dicks reading this shit? My body is crawling all over.

I'm not affected by such things. I guess some people faint at the sight of blood.

[KChiefsQT]

Ever been kicked in the nuts?

Nuff said.

So, now you're implying I have nuts?




ROFL

[Simplex3]

I'm not affected by such things. I guess some people faint at the sight of blood.
Born without one, huh?

[Rain Man]

How are you men with dicks reading this shit? My body is crawling all over.

I innocently clicked on a tubgirl link once, and ever since then, nothing can shock or disgust me.

Well, other than the Broncos.

[4th and Long]

So, now you're implying I have nuts?




ROFL
No. :p but if you had experienced that pain, you'd understand how we can talk about this with relative calmness.

[Hammock Parties]

Shouldn't the article have been titled, simply "Pencil in penis?"

I mean...OBVIOUSLY it backfired.

[Nzoner]

How are you men with dicks reading this shit? My body is crawling all over.

Once you've had your dick caught in a zipper nothing else really seems too painful.

[4th and Long]

Once you've had your dick caught in a zipper nothing else really seems too painful.
Thank you, Ted Stroehmann.

http://www.cinema.com/image_lib/1019_007_thumb.jpg

[stevieray]

How are you men with dicks

As opposed to?

[Nzoner]

Thank you, Ted Stroehmann.

http://www.cinema.com/image_lib/1019_007_thumb.jpg


"We got a bleeder!!"

[Rain Man]

That scene was painful, but there were two parts that really stand out to me as hilarious.

The first was when Markie Post (the mom) jumped in and sprayed Bactine on him.

The second was obvious. "Just yank it down." followed by "We have a bleeder!"

[stevieray]

That scene was painful, but there were two parts that really stand out to me as hilarious.

The first was when Markie Post (the mom) jumped in and sprayed Bactine on him.

The second was obvious. "Just yank it down." followed by "We have a bleeder!"


mmmm. markie post.

[KChiefsQT]

As opposed to?
men without dicks

[stevieray]

men without dicks

today's women?

[KChiefsQT]

today's women?
I've met some men... that just couldn't have dicks, or a set of jewels. It wouldn't be possible.

[Rain Man]

mmmm. markie post.


Mmmmm.


I told my parents that I watched Night Court because of John Laroquette, but truthfully it was just to watch Ms. Sullivan jiggle up to the bench.

[stevieray]

Mmmmm.


I told my parents that I watched Night Court because of John Laroquette, but truthfully it was just to watch Ms. Sullivan jiggle up to the bench.

I liked the episode where she took care of the baby at home. In nightgowns and robes.

I'm old school. I like something left for the imagination.

[stumppy]

I am curious about the length of his member................

Maybe you can catch up with him in a bathroom peeker.

[Hammock Parties]

Maybe you can catch up with him in a bathroom peeker.

I think the airfare would be prohibitive.

[Sure-Oz]

At no time have I ever even considered the possibility of putting anything IN my d**k. This guy is an idiot.
No ****ing shit, wtf

[Jenny Gump]

In nursing school, I had to take care of a sicko that stuck a pencil in his penis with a balloon around the end. Shoved that latex balloon as far up as the pencil would take it. He somehow attempted (but failed) to blow up the balloon, which I'm thinking would have been some kind of flexible feat in itself. However, he damaged his urethra with the pencil. What an idiot.

"Hi you sick f*ck. I'll be your student nurse today."

[Archie F. Swin]

Some people will do anything to make their backpack lighter.

[dj56dt58]

In nursing school, I had to take care of a sicko that stuck a pencil in his penis with a balloon around the end. Shoved that latex balloon as far up as the pencil would take it. He somehow attempted (but failed) to blow up the balloon, which I'm thinking would have been some kind of flexible feat in itself. However, he damaged his urethra with the pencil. What an idiot.

"Hi you sick f*ck. I'll be your student nurse today."
I'm gonna have nightmares from these posts...

[greg63]

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1722414.html?menu=news.quirkies

Pencil in penis backfires

A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex..."


What an idiotic moron. :shake:

[greg63]

In nursing school, I had to take care of a sicko that stuck a pencil in his penis with a balloon around the end. Shoved that latex balloon as far up as the pencil would take it. He somehow attempted (but failed) to blow up the balloon, which I'm thinking would have been some kind of flexible feat in itself. However, he damaged his urethra with the pencil. What an idiot.

"Hi you sick f*ck. I'll be your student nurse today."


ROFLROFLROFLROFL

[pak1983]

was it a number 2?

[Rausch]

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1722414.html?menu=news.quirkies

Pencil in penis backfires


What kind of God-frosaken opiates and hallucinogens must you be on to go ****whit enough to think this wouldn't backfire?...

[Nightwish]

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1722414.html?menu=news.quirkies

Pencil in penis backfires

A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex.

Zeljko Tupic, from Belgrade, told doctors he had experienced erectile difficulties in the past.

So as he prepared for a night with his new lover, he decided to insert a thin pencil into his penis.

Tupic had to cut his sex session short when the pencil shifted and became lodged in his bladder, forcing him to call an ambulance, the daily Kurir reported.

Doctor Aleksandar Milosevic from Belgrade's Zvezdara hospital, who succesfully removed the pencil, said: "At first the patient did not tell us what really happened, but x-rays proved the truth.

"Tupic said he had no idea there were things like Viagra available but agreed that in future he will try pills before he takes any more chances with pencils."
I'm not sure which is scarier, getting a pencil stuck in your penis, or being operated on in the Balkans by a guy named Milosevic!

[Dunit35]

I knew a girl that stuck a pencil in her vagina. She was real young and it got stuck and had to go to the ER.

[el borracho]

Zeljko Tupic? I thought for sure it was Rich Scantron who did this.

[SLAG]

I knew a girl that stuck a pencil in her vagina. She was real young and it got stuck and had to go to the ER.


I had heard of a girl breaking off a hot dog up in there once.

[Rausch]

I'm not sure which is scarier, getting a pencil stuck in your penis, or being operated on in the Balkans by a guy named Milosevic!


Uh, I do.......

[chagrin]

speechless

[chagrin]

Okay, maybe not - I can't believe nobody has posted the words "pencil dick" yet.

[MahiMike]

Another reason why I always use a pen instead of a pencil...

[Dartgod]

The pen(cil) is mightier than the....er, sword.

[J Diddy]

I wonder if it erased his balls....

[Chiefnj]

Is there ever a time when sticking a pencil in your penis wouldn't backfire? Has there ever been an occassion in the history of mankind where someone did this and at the end of the event said "God-damn, this turned out better than I thought!"?

[greg63]

Is there ever a time when sticking a pencil in your penis wouldn't backfire? Has there ever been an occassion in the history of mankind where someone did this and at the end of the event said "God-damn, this turned out better than I thought!"?


...Not that I know of.

[plbrdude]

Is there ever a time when sticking a pencil in your penis wouldn't backfire? Has there ever been an occassion in the history of mankind where someone did this and at the end of the event said "God-damn, this turned out better than I thought!"?


i fail to see how the results of doing something like that could ever be good. i can't even imagine what one would be thinking.

[Kclee]

Okay, maybe not - I can't believe nobody has posted the words "pencil dick" yet.

Or this one:

Lucky Day: Hold it El Guapo! Or I'll fill you so full of lead you'll be using your dick for a pencil!

[Frankie]

Pencil in penis backfires.Correction,... frontfires.

[ROYC75]

Yep, he had a pencil dick.

[ROYC75]

Okay, maybe not - I can't believe nobody has posted the words "pencil dick" yet.

OK dickhead, I didn't read the whole thread comments, you beat me to the punch, err dick.

[Extra Point]

Not the sharpest tool in the shed........

[Rooster]

Or this one:

Lucky Day: Hold it El Guapo! Or I'll fill you so full of lead you'll be using your dick for a pencil!


ROFL Classic ROFL

[chagrin]

OK dickhead, I didn't read the whole thread comments, you beat me to the punch, err dick.

That'll teach ya to write me off so quick!

err, uh...nevermind

[plbrdude]

:LOL:

[Nightwish]

That'll teach ya to write me off so quick!

err, uh...nevermind
Yeah, it gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "write off," doesn't it? ROFL

Rep for that!

[Frankie]

If this method worked gochiefs would write the next "War and Peace."
(At least in volume, if not quality :p)

[mike_b_284]

Is there ever a time when sticking a pencil in your penis wouldn't backfire? Has there ever been an occassion in the history of mankind where someone did this and at the end of the event said "God-damn, this turned out better than I thought!"?

ROFL ROFL ROFL

[Hammock Parties]

If this method worked gochiefs would write the next "War and Peace."
(At least in volume, if not quality :p)

What?

[Frankie]

What?
Never mind. It was supposed to be a joke. At a second look it's not that funny. Not one of my wittiest moments on the CP. Carry on. :)