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HMc
01-29-2007, 09:20 PM
Dear Believer,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your threads, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan, HMc.

chop
01-29-2007, 09:22 PM
Thanks for sharing your ignorance with us.

milkman
01-29-2007, 09:25 PM
Thanks for sharing your ignorance with us.

You haven't been around much lately, have you?

Simplex3
01-29-2007, 09:30 PM
LMAO

trndobrd
01-29-2007, 09:32 PM
not sure about the rest, but as to (i):

although a football is refered to as "pigskin" it is actually cowhide. The Chiefs receivers seem to err on the side of caution on that one.


Not sure about your "footie". Cowhide form red cows?

BigRedChief
01-29-2007, 09:32 PM
Dear Believer,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your threads, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan, HMc.
Holy Shit. Thats the post of the year! :clap:

KcMizzou
01-29-2007, 09:33 PM
LMAO

That was awesome.

Eleazar
01-29-2007, 09:33 PM
Well, funny, but this needed a new thread why?

kstater
01-29-2007, 09:35 PM
This must have taken hours to put together. Best post I have seen in a long time.


:bravo:

HMc
01-29-2007, 09:37 PM
while i'll take the credit for finding it and applying it, it aint mine, its been going round the net for years. I like it though.

booger
01-29-2007, 09:39 PM
rep

Sully
01-29-2007, 09:41 PM
One of the better episodes of West Wing included this.

BigRedChief
01-29-2007, 09:43 PM
Well, funny, but this needed a new thread why?
shaadup he's on a roll.:)

Manila-Chief
01-29-2007, 09:46 PM
HMc ... Very humorious ... well done!!! Your point is well made!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DJay23
01-29-2007, 09:53 PM
Holy Shit. Thats the post of the year! :clap:
I'll second that.

Logical
01-29-2007, 10:00 PM
Dear Believer,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your threads, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan, HMc.:clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap:

Logical
01-29-2007, 10:02 PM
Well, funny, but this needed a new thread why?Why not the mods are letting Believer create multi spam threads.

Simplex3
01-29-2007, 10:04 PM
Why not the mods are letting Believer create multi spam threads.
Bingo. This is worse than Hootie, who they put the clamps on.

Pitt Gorilla
01-29-2007, 10:09 PM
One of the better episodes of West Wing included this.That's what I thought of as well.

stumppy
01-29-2007, 10:14 PM
Bingo. This is worse than Hootie, who they put the clamps on.


Go figure.


Killer post H.

Bwana
01-29-2007, 10:17 PM
Bingo. This is worse than Hootie, who they put the clamps on.

Yep, this guy needs his nads cut off as well.

Believer
01-29-2007, 10:33 PM
Dear Believer,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your threads, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan, HMc.

Perhaps you should consult an Orthodox Jew on this matter as the Books you pulled these from are from what makes up the Torah.

When Jesus Christ fulfilled Old Testament prophesy and Died on the Cross as payment for all sin, we were freed from the bondage of the Law. We became a New Creation, and a New Covenant was established.

For example, if you read Romans, Paul gives a comprehensive description of why we no longer use circumcision as a way to fulfilling law. If one is doing so, Paul writes, we need to live by the law perfectly or be condemned. But by Faith, we have Salvation. We are still to not sin but we are not condemned by it if we are In Christ and go to Him with it if we do sin.

Btw, Practicing Homosexuality is sin, but no more than Lying, fornication,greed, envy, arrogance, not honoring your parents, not putting God before idols (which could include anything we worship ahead of Him, like, say football, or work, or realtionships etc)

sin is sin. And the wages of sin is death. But Jesus Christ has washed away the sins of those who believe upon Him.

Hammock Parties
01-29-2007, 10:38 PM
Dear Believer,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your threads, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan, HMc.

Religion is full of ignorant biggots eh? Gotta love ignorance, especialy when theres a ton of proof towards the subject....

Believer
01-29-2007, 10:44 PM
Religion is full of ignorant biggots eh? Gotta love ignorance, especialy when theres a ton of proof towards the subject....

once again, Christians are freed from that law by the New Covenant.

of course, by bashing the first 5 Books of the Bible, this thread is really being more Anti-Semitic than Anti-Christian.

do you really want to go there?

Hammock Parties
01-29-2007, 10:46 PM
once again, Christians are freed from that law by the New Covenant.

of course, by bashing the first 5 Books of the Bible, this thread is really being more Anti-Semitic than Anti-Christian.

do you really want to go there?

shit, id fight the ignorance of religion to the grave man. Religion is total bullshit, live your life, not some omniprescent made up figure. Do you believe in magic? probably not, then how can you believe in a magic being?

KcMizzou
01-29-2007, 11:08 PM
Snopes is your friend:
http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/drlaura.asp

This is a great letter, but it wasn't written by HMc. Sorry for raining on the parade.Eh... HMc already said as much anyway. People just dont read all the comments.

noa
01-29-2007, 11:10 PM
Eh... HMc already as much anyway. People just dont read all the comments.


Gotcha. I missed that post. Sorry.

Thig Lyfe
01-29-2007, 11:14 PM
Snopes is your friend:
http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/drlaura.asp

This is a great letter, but it wasn't written by HMc. Sorry for raining on the parade.

I knew I had read that somewhere before. Still, kudos to HMc for digging it up and using it in a perfect context.

Halfcan
01-29-2007, 11:25 PM
Why not the mods are letting Believer create multi spam threads.

BeLIEver is a dumbass and is just spewing a bunch of crap to piss everyone off.

Sully
01-29-2007, 11:29 PM
<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rHaVUjjH3EI"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/rHaVUjjH3EI" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

Logical
01-29-2007, 11:47 PM
BeLIEver is a dumbass and is just spewing a bunch of crap to piss everyone off.True enough, but the Mods letting him continue to do it is worse.

BigRedChief
01-30-2007, 08:23 AM
BeLIEver is a dumbass and is just spewing a bunch of crap to piss everyone off.
And doing a damn good job at it.

CarolinaChiefz
01-30-2007, 09:02 AM
I don't post here often, but enjoy reading the thoughts and conversation, especially with regards to the passion we all have for the Chiefs.

On to Believer....

While he and I have different approaches, I, too am a Christian. Now, I don't generally make it a habit to post my beliefs on sports bulletin boards, usually because that's not what these forums were designed to do. And I'm also possess the desire to not have someone else's beliefs shoved down MY throat, and I try to act reciprocally.

Having said that, I think that Believer is acting out of genuineness (is that a word?). His methods may differ from mine or other Christians, but ask yourself this:

Would it be easier for him/her to just shut his mouth and/or keyboard than to post something like this in public? Does he realize that he'll likely be ridiculed for sharing this? Does he wonder why, whenever Al Davis' appears in public, his skin now looks to be covered in a vaseline-type substance usually reserved for burn victims (sorry..had to go football with it a second!)?

I would imagine that he does.

And while I don't know this person, I tend to think that people usually take the path of least resistence...almost exclusively in their lives. What I'm getting at is this...The easiest thing for him to do is simply to do NOTHING. Whether stated properly or not, I think he/she is simply doing what he/she thinks is the right thing to do.

I get that you feel spammed. If it were a solicitation for 800.GAMBLING, Ron Popeil's latest unnecessary appliance, or Time/Life's collection of the greatest Pan flute masterpieces, I'd likely feel the same.

Again, for clarity...I'll say it again: I get it.

But even given the spam factor, there DOES seem to be an inordinate amount of vitriol for something as simple as someone sharing his/her beliefs, and doing so without malice or condemnation of anyone here (though, admittedly, I haven't read through all of the posts...forgive me if I mis-speak here!).

Just my thoughts. Either way, I wish each of you the peace of mind and heart that I have, and hope that I haven't added fuel to the fire.

Brock
01-30-2007, 09:06 AM
Having said that, I think that Believer is acting out of genuineness.

Definitely not. Believer is a troll who is a former banned poster.

CarolinaChiefz
01-30-2007, 09:07 AM
Could be, Brock. Again...I don't know the history. Just kind of came out of left-field...and I apologize if I'm missing something here.