Getting to know Chiefaroo's Johnson

[ChiefaRoo]

Chiefaroo has signed a life time contract with his Penis.

The penis might be the most important part of my body. Its importance might be even more prominent than sight. This year, Chiefaroo massively upgraded his penis' productivity by bringing back last years girlfriend and bringing in two rookie talents to give Mr. P the once over from time to time in what are known as booty calls.

There's going to be a goal of deep penetration while in the missionary position for Mr. P. It will likely include his penis as an initiator, backed by his two balls. Their play last year in support of Mr. P suggests this could be a rewarding team game plan.

But what do we know about Chiefaroos' johnson, other than he's probably good?

Well, first of all he's got plenty of game day experience and has enjoyed a fairly productive career.

Here's what I've accumulated.

Full Name: Henry "Red Rooster" Spankenmonk
Born: January 11, 1977
Wichita, KS
Height: 7"+
Weight: about a lb.
Age: 30
Pos: Missionary, Doggie and the patented "T-bone" maneuver
Experience: 14 years
College: Wichita State - Where he learned how to work "The Shocker" into foreplay

He earned lots of playing time after Chiefaroos latest nightlife successes and that's plenty respectable.

What about specific skills? Here's what I got for positives from the ladies:

* perfect size
* perfect gap-filling, stuffer
* specializes against the shaven
* good technique
* collapses the hand block consistently
* almost always a bull-rusher

Negatives.

* not very fast (which is a good thing, lets move this to positive)
* doesn't move all that great - Sometimes he gets drunk and experiences "whiskey dick"
* often plays high - but only when drinking Guiness

[acesn8s]

A Planeteer with penis envy? ChiefsPlanet has never had such a poster.

[DaneMcCloud]

Rep.

[Smed1065]

It must be late. I call nuthooks!

[elvomito]

From KFFL

ChiefaRoo | H. Spankenmonk soon departing?
Tue, 22 May 2007 16:59:01 -0700

Bai Ling, of the Bangkok Bulletin, reports ChiefaRoo member Henry "Red Rooster" Spankenmonk is being courted by a currently unknown sex-change surgeon from the Bifchop section of Bangkok, Thailand, where sex change operations cost around $1300. Chiefaroo has declined to comment but sources report that high-pitched squeals have been heard coming from his bungalow in Wichita, KS.

Spankenmonk has recently been heard expressing feelings of being underutilized, and would like to get more balls in practice and on gameday when the pads are on.

Although Spankenmonk is currently under a lifetime contract, it is reported the Thai surgeon has offered ChiefaRoo a considerable compensation package in return for his release. A latex dishwashing glove, bowl of wax, thermos of antifreeze, and a rubber nipple is rumored to be included in that offer.

We will have continual coverage as this develops over the next few days.

[BigRedChief]

From KFFL

ChiefaRoo | H. Spankenmonk soon departing?
Tue, 22 May 2007 16:59:01 -0700

Bai Ling, of the Bangkok Bulletin, reports ChiefaRoo member Henry "Red Rooster" Spankenmonk is being courted by a currently unknown sex-change surgeon from the Bifchop section of Bangkok, Thailand, where sex change operations cost around $1300. Chiefaroo has declined to comment but sources report that high-pitched squeals have been heard coming from his bungalow in Wichita, KS.

Spankenmonk has recently been heard expressing feelings of being underutilized, and would like to get more balls in practice and on gameday when the pads are on.

Although Spankenmonk is currently under a lifetime contract, it is reported the Thai surgeon has offered ChiefaRoo a considerable compensation package in return for his release. A latex dishwashing glove, bowl of wax, thermos of antifreeze, and a rubber nipple is rumored to be included in that offer.

We will have continual coverage as this develops over the next few days.Much funnier than the orignal post.:harumph:

[boogblaster]

Chiefa rofl has a penis of envy ...every stud-field mouse in history would die for ...

[|Zach|]

From KFFL

ChiefaRoo | H. Spankenmonk soon departing?
Tue, 22 May 2007 16:59:01 -0700

Bai Ling, of the Bangkok Bulletin, reports ChiefaRoo member Henry "Red Rooster" Spankenmonk is being courted by a currently unknown sex-change surgeon from the Bifchop section of Bangkok, Thailand, where sex change operations cost around $1300. Chiefaroo has declined to comment but sources report that high-pitched squeals have been heard coming from his bungalow in Wichita, KS.

Spankenmonk has recently been heard expressing feelings of being underutilized, and would like to get more balls in practice and on gameday when the pads are on.

Although Spankenmonk is currently under a lifetime contract, it is reported the Thai surgeon has offered ChiefaRoo a considerable compensation package in return for his release. A latex dishwashing glove, bowl of wax, thermos of antifreeze, and a rubber nipple is rumored to be included in that offer.

We will have continual coverage as this develops over the next few days.
ROFL

[ChiefaRoo]

Much funnier than the orignal post.:harumph:

I did the best I could using the Alphonso Boone template. What do you want poetry?

PS - You're fired

[TinyEvel]

I'm glad I stopped drunkposting.

[ChiefaRoo]

I'm glad I stopped drunkposting.


I wasn't drunk I had just played poker for 12 hours straight Tyney E.

[Pushead2]

This is the worst thread on the board. Think harder Homer

[88TG88]

Chiefaroo please explain the the patented "T-bone" maneuver.

[ChiefaRoo]

Chiefaroo please explain the the patented "T-bone" maneuver.
That's when you have her in front with her ankles over your shoulders towards the end of the bed while your standing up and then in one quick motion you grab both ankles taking them off your shoulders and bringing them down and together so she's shaped into a right angle while your still standing. Wahhlahhh! T-bone.

If she's limber you can do a modified T-bone where you only grab one leg, she stays on her back and you go horizontal and perpindicular to her. But be careful not to fall off the edge of the bed.

PS - In both maneuvers it is considered bad form to ever break your stride if you know what I mean. A properly performed T-Bone will require one continuous motion.

It's usually a good idea to train in one of these before you move into advanced positions. I have one in my house.
<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/m5bGjduR4GM"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/m5bGjduR4GM" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

[ChiefaRoo]

This is the worst thread on the board. Think harder Homer

Pay homage you lowly n00b

[88TG88]

ROFL ROFL ROFL wtf kind of gyro sex are u doing.

[ChiefaRoo]

ROFL ROFL ROFL wtf kind of gyro sex are u doing.

I like to move around and make it an athletic event. Right now I'm looking for a one legged chinese girl.

[JohninGpt]

There are some folks a man just doesn't want to find himself shaking hands with. Henry is one of those.

[runnercyclist]

Chiefaroo is as smart as a horse and hung like Einstein

[StcChief]

Hello Johnson meet Cigar Cutter. :p

[KCChiefsMan]

.

[ChiefaRoo]

Who wants to kiss my ring? Or in the ladies case something else....

By the way my baows have been nominated for Baows of the year by Playgirl magazine. They're pert, well sized and produce the most powerful sperm known to man. In fact, I could easily get a room full of girls pregnant just by letting one load fly in the room itself as my guys are airborne and have a fire and forget capability.

[Thig Lyfe]

From KFFL

ChiefaRoo | H. Spankenmonk soon departing?
Tue, 22 May 2007 16:59:01 -0700

Bai Ling, of the Bangkok Bulletin, reports ChiefaRoo member Henry "Red Rooster" Spankenmonk is being courted by a currently unknown sex-change surgeon from the Bifchop section of Bangkok, Thailand, where sex change operations cost around $1300. Chiefaroo has declined to comment but sources report that high-pitched squeals have been heard coming from his bungalow in Wichita, KS.

Spankenmonk has recently been heard expressing feelings of being underutilized, and would like to get more balls in practice and on gameday when the pads are on.

Although Spankenmonk is currently under a lifetime contract, it is reported the Thai surgeon has offered ChiefaRoo a considerable compensation package in return for his release. A latex dishwashing glove, bowl of wax, thermos of antifreeze, and a rubber nipple is rumored to be included in that offer.

We will have continual coverage as this develops over the next few days.

Bai Ling is a hack. When I worked for the Bulletin I was supposed to get a check for 500 bahts. Never got one.