Feeling Better About The Chinese Threat Today

[FAX]

I just learned that the head Chinese guy at the place where they made the lead Sesame Street toys killed himself today.

For those of you who don't recall the details, US toy companies recently recalled exactly 44 gamillion toys that had been manufactured in China due to high lead content in the little toys. Now, the Chinese guy responsible has committed seppuku.

I've often worried about our country being overrun by the Chinese. They are a disciplined lot with tons of money to spend on weapons and insidious "all you can eat" buffets that have caused American fingers to get so fat that they won't fit through a trigger guard.

But now, there's cause for hope. Chinese die from embarrassment. All we have to do is make them look silly and they will kill themselves. Ladies and gentlemen, these are happy days. If we can get close enough, I think that we can probably knock off most of them with the "pull my finger" trick.

FAX

Disclaimers: Sorry if re-post.

[Planetman]

Dude hung himself in a toy factory. I'm guessing he saw what they did to their equivalent of our Head Of The FDA a few months back and saved the government the trouble of killing him anyway.

[Redrum_69]

Rumor has it he got pissed off..because he worked for Fishel Plice.

[Redrum_69]

Fisher-Price to Recall Nearly 1M Toys
By AUDRA ANG, Associated Press Writer

Thursday, August 2, 2007

(08-02) 03:34 PDT BEIJING, China (AP) --


China said it would work with the United States to improve product safety amid a massive U.S. recall Thursday of plastic preschool toys made by a Chinese vendor, including the popular Big Bird, Elmo, Dora and Diego characters.


The remarks came just ahead of toy-maker Fisher-Price's announcement that it was recalling almost 1 million toys, the latest in a string of Chinese product safety scandals.


China "attaches great importance to product quality and food safety and is highly responsible," said Wei Chuanzhong, an official with the General Administration for Quality Supervision, Inspection and Quarantine, one of China's product safety watchdogs.


"We want to cooperate with other countries including the U.S. to strengthen cooperation and communication," Wei was quoted as saying Wednesday on the administration's Web site.


However, Wei added that while China would "not avoid our problems, we also do not agree to playing up the situation regardless of the facts.


An official surnamed Xia said the General Administration for Quality Supervision, Inspection and Quarantine had heard about the recall but could not comment because they were investigating the case.


The problem with the recalled toys was detected by an internal probe and reported to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, David Allmark, general manager of Fisher-Price, told The Associated Press Wednesday.


Fisher-Price and the commission issued statements saying parents should keep suspect toys away from children and contact the company.


The commission works with companies to issue recalls when it finds consumer goods that can be harmful. Under current regulations, children's products found to have more than .06 percent lead accessible to users are subject to a recall.


Allmark says the recall was "fast-tracked," which allowed the company to quarantine two-thirds of the toys before they even made it to store shelves. In negotiating details of the recall, Fisher-Price and the government agreed to withhold details from the public until Thursday to give stores time to get suspect toys off shelves and Fisher-Price time to get its recall hot line up and running.


Allmark said the recall was troubling because Fisher-Price has had a long-standing relationship with the Chinese vendor, which had applied decorative paint to the toys. Allmark said the company would use this recall as an opportunity to put even better systems in place to monitor vendors whose conduct does not meet Mattel's standards.


He added: "We are still concluding the investigation, how it happened. ... But there will be a dramatic investigation on how this happened. We will learn from this."


The recall follows another high-profile move from toy maker RC2 Corp., which in June voluntarily recalled 1.5 million wooden railroad toys and set parts from its Thomas & Friends Wooden Railway product line.


The company said that the surface paint on certain toys and parts made in China between January 2005 and April 2006 contain lead, affecting 26 components and 23 retailers.

[chasedude]

It's it about time to start banning imports from China? This is getting ridiculous!

[Rain Man]

Potential methods of embarrassing the Chinese.

1. Let's mention that they built a wall that didn't go all the way around their country. That seems to me like it would be embarrassing.

Genghis Khan (to troops): "Run around the wall! Just run around it!"

2. Engage them on MySpace and offer to trade pictures of buxom women we see on the streets.

3. Mention that one of their leaders' name was pronounced "dung".

[Hog's Gone Fishin]

We should make an anouncement that after interviewing 50% of the population on earth that is is a definite fact that chinese men have the smallest penises in the world.

[ottawa_chiefs_fan]

I just learned that the head Chinese guy at the place where they made the lead Sesame Street toys killed himself today.

For those of you who don't recall the details, US toy companies recently recalled exactly 44 gamillion toys that had been manufactured in China due to high lead content in the little toys. Now, the Chinese guy responsible has committed seppuku.

I've often worried about our country being overrun by the Chinese. They are a disciplined lot with tons of money to spend on weapons and insidious "all you can eat" buffets that have caused American fingers to get so fat that they won't fit through a trigger guard.

But now, there's cause for hope. Chinese die from embarrassment. All we have to do is make them look silly and they will kill themselves. Ladies and gentlemen, these are happy days. If we can get close enough, I think that we can probably knock off most of them with the "pull my finger" trick.

FAX

Disclaimers: Sorry if re-post.

If you don't write for a living - you should - you are consistently the most original and funny poster on these boards - and don't let my low post count fool you - I am a man of few words.......but have been faithfully following this site for quite some time....

[nychief]

he was probably just killed. they execute you for shit like that...