Hammock Parties
01-26-2008, 11:34 PM
http://www.modbee.com/columnists/agostini/story/192075.html
Why are the Raiders 19-61 since 2002, you ask? Because Al Davis wants to dominate -- his team, not necessarily the NFL.
Davis to Lane Kiffin: You can stay as coach, but your office has been relocated across the street. We'll call if we need you.
About Kiffin's take this week that everything is rosy and cheery between him and Rob Ryan: Never mind.
It must be Super Bowl "dead week" when the talking points are the Brady baby, the Brady boot and the Brady bouquet.
Tom Brady can't win. He's even been accused of throwing the football that swelled Marcia's nose, and so what if he wasn't yet born.
For the record, Peter zonked Marcia.
All you need to know about Brady's ankle: A herd of rampaging elephants won't keep him off the field next Sunday.
First Peyton, now Eli in the Super Bowl: Archie Manning's revenge.
For all his brilliance and impact on the NFL, Brett Favre showed -- with his final pass Sunday -- why his teams have won only one Super Bowl.
Remembering the man who dedicated his life to Ceres youth baseball: the late George Costa.
My idea of a 49er fantasy: The Seahawks' Mike Holmgren finishes his coaching duties next season, then jumps into the 49ers' front office.
Modesto Metro Conference football teams never have won a playoff game on the field, but: They reside in a school district that never would fire a coach for losing the section final (Clovis West's Marty Martin).
Jim Brown called out Tiger Woods for not reacting more harshly to Kelly Tilghman's "lynch" phrase. Brown doesn't get it. Woods is too busy setting records to be the next Al Sharpton.
Tilghman is not a racist. She can be demolition-derby glib.
It starts in Motown: The Canadian Tour's return to Del Rio CC in April will kick off the circuit's 18-tournament 2008 schedule.
The Miami Heat has lost 15 in a row. Back to the boardroom, Pat Riley.
Pranksters are breaking into conference calls featuring college basketball coaches. The solution: Have the jerks report to Bob Knight.
No. 2 Kansas trots out Sasha Kaun. Rhymes with Chaka Kahn.
The Warriors are considering a Don Nelson-Chris Webber reunion while their fan base screams, "Nooooooooooo!"
The Buccaneers' Mike Alstott retired and closed a 12-year career. No more "Alstott up the gut!"
The Saint Mary's Gaels feature forward Ian O'Leary, whose father is Ripon High graduate Mike O'Leary. His grandfather is former Ripon Unified Superintendent Joe O'Leary.
Fun to watch 24-7: Monta Ellis, Golden State.
It took a Roger Federer loss in the Australian Open semifinals to appreciate his incredible run (10 consecutive Grand Slam finals).
The Giants' Peter Magowan and Brian Sabean are trapped between Congress and the Mitchell Report -- the ultimate BALCO sandwich.
The NFL didn't get its Patriots-Favre Super Bowl, but Patriots-New York will suffice.
To Kiffin: Preserve your sanity. Let Davis win, which means you win because you've escaped.
Kiffin's new hero: Jon Gruden.
The end game: Davis, standing tall and alone amid the embers and ashes of his once-great franchise.
Why are the Raiders 19-61 since 2002, you ask? Because Al Davis wants to dominate -- his team, not necessarily the NFL.
Davis to Lane Kiffin: You can stay as coach, but your office has been relocated across the street. We'll call if we need you.
About Kiffin's take this week that everything is rosy and cheery between him and Rob Ryan: Never mind.
It must be Super Bowl "dead week" when the talking points are the Brady baby, the Brady boot and the Brady bouquet.
Tom Brady can't win. He's even been accused of throwing the football that swelled Marcia's nose, and so what if he wasn't yet born.
For the record, Peter zonked Marcia.
All you need to know about Brady's ankle: A herd of rampaging elephants won't keep him off the field next Sunday.
First Peyton, now Eli in the Super Bowl: Archie Manning's revenge.
For all his brilliance and impact on the NFL, Brett Favre showed -- with his final pass Sunday -- why his teams have won only one Super Bowl.
Remembering the man who dedicated his life to Ceres youth baseball: the late George Costa.
My idea of a 49er fantasy: The Seahawks' Mike Holmgren finishes his coaching duties next season, then jumps into the 49ers' front office.
Modesto Metro Conference football teams never have won a playoff game on the field, but: They reside in a school district that never would fire a coach for losing the section final (Clovis West's Marty Martin).
Jim Brown called out Tiger Woods for not reacting more harshly to Kelly Tilghman's "lynch" phrase. Brown doesn't get it. Woods is too busy setting records to be the next Al Sharpton.
Tilghman is not a racist. She can be demolition-derby glib.
It starts in Motown: The Canadian Tour's return to Del Rio CC in April will kick off the circuit's 18-tournament 2008 schedule.
The Miami Heat has lost 15 in a row. Back to the boardroom, Pat Riley.
Pranksters are breaking into conference calls featuring college basketball coaches. The solution: Have the jerks report to Bob Knight.
No. 2 Kansas trots out Sasha Kaun. Rhymes with Chaka Kahn.
The Warriors are considering a Don Nelson-Chris Webber reunion while their fan base screams, "Nooooooooooo!"
The Buccaneers' Mike Alstott retired and closed a 12-year career. No more "Alstott up the gut!"
The Saint Mary's Gaels feature forward Ian O'Leary, whose father is Ripon High graduate Mike O'Leary. His grandfather is former Ripon Unified Superintendent Joe O'Leary.
Fun to watch 24-7: Monta Ellis, Golden State.
It took a Roger Federer loss in the Australian Open semifinals to appreciate his incredible run (10 consecutive Grand Slam finals).
The Giants' Peter Magowan and Brian Sabean are trapped between Congress and the Mitchell Report -- the ultimate BALCO sandwich.
The NFL didn't get its Patriots-Favre Super Bowl, but Patriots-New York will suffice.
To Kiffin: Preserve your sanity. Let Davis win, which means you win because you've escaped.
Kiffin's new hero: Jon Gruden.
The end game: Davis, standing tall and alone amid the embers and ashes of his once-great franchise.