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pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:39 PM
... who simply does not care. He is in 5th grade and has simply given up.

How do you motivate a 5th grader who thinks he has achieved academically all he is going to achieve?

He thinks his skills on the basketball court (he really is pretty good actually) will carry him through life.

I have tried "fatherly" sit downs with the kid and explained to him that if he wants to play pro ball, he will need to go to college. But that no college will let him play if he can't make decent grades. He is a smart kid but he has to stop giving up so quickly and actually pay attention in class.

I have tried getting him interested in books and reading using things he likes. Animals and sports.

I have tried "tough love" and told him that if he keeps giving up on everything, that he would wind up working the midnight shift at walmart.

I have ignored him and told him to come back when he actually wants to pay attention and learn.

I have tried stepping him through the process (reducing fractions for example) step by step.... AND HE GETS IT. He just simply does not want to do it.

Dunno what to do for him anymore really. His parents are not involved and obviously don't push him to achieve. He thinks he is dumb, and he is not. But when he gets home, instead of doing his homework.... his parents let him plant himself in front of the TV.

*sigh*

Parents.... any suggestions on what else I can do to motivate this kid?

Skip Towne
02-08-2008, 05:43 PM
You teach 5th grade?

Hammock Parties
02-08-2008, 05:44 PM
Write a letter to his parents.

Good parenting is really the only way to correct this. I was like this once with an Algebra II class. I hated my teacher's guts. I blamed failing entirely on her. I thought I had it good when the semester was over and finally the stupid class was over. I would take Algebra II next year with a different teacher.

Nope. Went to summer school. ROFL

Fortunately I liked the teacher.

BigVE
02-08-2008, 05:44 PM
It will be hard for you to motivate him...it will really need to come from is parents. If your "preaching" one thing and they are preaching something else it will be tough. Good luck. If all else fails just buy him some bling.

Iowanian
02-08-2008, 05:46 PM
There are 3 types of learners, visual, auditory and kinesthetic.

Find out HOW he learns. Does he do better with a hands-on activity vs listening to instruction? Find games, group activities that allow him to absorb some things, while he's learning. Give him tastes of success and challenge him.

If he's quitting because things are getting a little tough now, how does he expect to react when he meets his match in competative level? He'll have to work even harder than the other guy to beat him.

Keep beating the message in different ways until you find one that gets his attention. He might be absorbing a lot more of your message than you think.

Earn his trust, lead by example....Show him the way.

munkey
02-08-2008, 05:49 PM
Parents.... any suggestions on what else I can do to motivate this kid?


You can only do your best to teach him...If you don't like teaching go into counseling. Isn't that what your trying to do anyway?

stevieray
02-08-2008, 05:51 PM
kindness(love) and encouragement(blessings)

Rain Man
02-08-2008, 05:52 PM
Show him pictures of Michael Vick and Peyton Manning, and ask him why he thinks their outcomes are different.

MTG#10
02-08-2008, 05:53 PM
The kid is black, correct?

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:53 PM
You teach 5th grade?

No, I posted this for shits and grins. LOL

Really though, I am not a 5th grade teacher. My job at school is to work with kids one on one who are either trouble makers, or borderline special ed.

I basically give those kids the one on one attention they need to make it through the class and try to set an example for them to follow.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:54 PM
If you don't like teaching go into counseling. Isn't that what your trying to do anyway?


Erm... no.

I love teaching. I am looking at working in a private school next year as the computer lab teacher.

munkey
02-08-2008, 05:54 PM
Earn his trust, lead by example....Show him the way.


Unfortunatly most teachers SUCK at this...And when some do they try to instill their own values in the child which don't exaclty agree with that childs family values and core beliefs.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:55 PM
The kid is black, correct?

:shake:

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:56 PM
Unfortunatly most teachers SUCK at this...And when some do they try to instill their own values in the child which don't exaclty agree with that childs family values and core beliefs.

And while I agree with you that many teachers SUCK, in general... not just in this one facet, I am not trying to instill anything more than a work ethic.

I doubt most parents would have a problem with that. At least I would hope not. lol

MTG#10
02-08-2008, 05:56 PM
:shake:

Is that a no? Im just trying to confirm my theory that stereotypes exist because they are usually true. Seriously I dont know any white 5th graders that think they are good enough at B-Ball to depend on it as a career.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:58 PM
There are 3 types of learners, visual, auditory and kinesthetic.

Find out HOW he learns. Does he do better with a hands-on activity vs listening to instruction? Find games, group activities that allow him to absorb some things, while he's learning. Give him tastes of success and challenge him.

If he's quitting because things are getting a little tough now, how does he expect to react when he meets his match in competative level? He'll have to work even harder than the other guy to beat him.

Keep beating the message in different ways until you find one that gets his attention. He might be absorbing a lot more of your message than you think.

Earn his trust, lead by example....Show him the way.

I asked him one day how he thought he would make it into pro ball when he just gives up when things get a little bit hard.

All he did was shrug and say "I dunno.... I just will". *sigh*

I hope you are right though and some of what I am telling him is sinking in.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 05:59 PM
Is that a no? Im just trying to confirm my theory that stereotypes exist because they are usually true.

mixed race

black & hispanic I believe

MTG#10
02-08-2008, 06:00 PM
mixed race

black & hispanic I believe

His confidence at such a young age is actually quite admirable.

Deberg_1990
02-08-2008, 06:02 PM
Is that a no? Im just trying to confirm my theory that stereotypes exist because they are usually true. Seriously I dont know any white 5th graders that think they are good enough at B-Ball to depend on it as a career.

Nope, hes Asian. Phillipino to be exact. :)

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:02 PM
His confidence at such a young age is actually quite admirable.

Malboro Chief?

munkey
02-08-2008, 06:03 PM
Erm... no.

I love teaching. I am looking at working in a private school next year as the computer lab teacher.


Sorry...It sounds like your trying to be a parent to him. Why would a "teacher" give tough love to a child that is not his own?

So this kid won't be a problem next year...chalk it up to the one that just didn't get it then. Overall I would say if the parents are not envolved your screwed.

I wouldn't lose sleep over it....BUT I do understand in a way what your looking for and want for the child.

It's why teaching is something I would never go into..I think it's human nature to care but it's such a two way street...I honestly couldn't imagine.


Good luck

munkey
02-08-2008, 06:06 PM
I asked him one day how he thought he would make it into pro ball when he just gives up when things get a little bit hard.

All he did was shrug and say "I dunno.... I just will". *sigh*

I hope you are right though and some of what I am telling him is sinking in.


So you talk about "pro-ball" when he's in 5th grade? Do you have kids of your own? Just a question...

bogey
02-08-2008, 06:06 PM
If he doesn't improve, take away his sports. When I was in High School many moons ago, I was flunking history. As soon as my teacher (and parents) worked it out with my coach that if I don't improve in history I don't play, all the sudden I got much better in history.

munkey
02-08-2008, 06:09 PM
And while I agree with you that many teachers SUCK, in general... not just in this one facet, I am not trying to instill anything more than a work ethic.

I doubt most parents would have a problem with that. At least I would hope not. lol

The thread move to page two so fast I didn't see this or the previous post envolving your job description...

Sorry...

Not that that changes things much :p

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:10 PM
Sorry...It sounds like your trying to be a parent to him. Why would a "teacher" give tough love to a child that is not his own?

So this kid won't be a problem next year...chalk it up to the one that just didn't get it then. Overall I would say if the parents are not envolved your screwed.

I wouldn't lose sleep over it....BUT I do understand in a way what your looking for and want for the child.

It's why teaching is something I would never go into..I think it's human nature to care but it's such a two way street...I honestly couldn't imagine.


Good luck

Trying to be a parent? Yes and no.

He sure as shit does not have anyone at home pushing him to reach his potential.

As for just letting him be since I won't have to deal with him next year.... that just is not me. If this kid takes just one thing from the many that I have been trying to hammer into him all year, all the frustration I have gone through this year will have been worth it.

Until the day he leaves to go to middle school, I feel like I have to do everything possible to help him reach his potential. It is simply not in my nature to just let him be and let his teachers next year deal with the problem.

I cannot believe that at 11, his attitude is already so deeply ingrained that he can't be helped. But as every year passes, and each teacher thinks to themselves that the next teacher will deal with it, it will become harder and harder for him to make changes.

Believe me though... I know exactly what you are saying.

munkey
02-08-2008, 06:11 PM
If he doesn't improve, take away his sports. When I was in High School many moons ago, I was flunking history. As soon as my teacher (and parents) worked it out with my coach that if I don't improve in history I don't play, all the sudden I got much better in history.

Ah...You said "Parents"...This kid obviously doesn't have any...

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:11 PM
So you talk about "pro-ball" when he's in 5th grade? Do you have kids of your own? Just a question...

No kids of my own.

And the pro ball is him talking.... not me.

He says he wants to play pro ball so I try and use it to help motivate him. Nothing more.

Rain Man
02-08-2008, 06:12 PM
If this kid makes the pros, someday he'll look back and identify pr_capone as the greatest barrier he had to overcome.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:13 PM
If this kid makes the pros, someday he'll look back and identify pr_capone as the greatest barrier he had to overcome.

ROFL ROFL ROFL

Bill S Preston
02-08-2008, 06:16 PM
Grab a ruler and spank his ass till he sits down and does his work. His parents should spank his ass when he gets home till he sits down and does his homework. I used to go out and play football every day after school. I started doing bad in classes. My dad popped my football. I still went out and didn't do my homework. I came home one day and got in a big fight with my dad, telling him that school was stupid, and all the other moronic crap you think as a kid. He told me to go cut a branch down from a tree in the backyard(I choose a smaller one which stung like shit), which he proceeded to hit me with 12 times, one for each year of my age. After that, I came home and did my homework after school, and I didn't get in another fight with my dad.

bogey
02-08-2008, 06:17 PM
Ah...You said "Parents"...This kid obviously doesn't have any...

Alright, forget the parents (sadly) bring in a coach. This kid will relate to a coach. Have the coach explain to him the importance of an education.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:18 PM
Grab a ruler and spank his ass till he sits down and does his work. His parents should spank his ass when he gets home till he sits down and does his homework. I used to go out and play football every day after school. I started doing bad in classes. My dad popped my football. I still went out and didn't do my homework. I came home one day and got in a big fight with my dad, telling him that school was stupid, and all the other moronic crap you think as a kid. He told me to go cut a branch down from a tree in the backyard(I choose a smaller one which stung like shit), which he proceeded to hit me with 12 times, one for each year of my age. After that, I came home and did my homework after school, and I didn't get in another fight with my dad.

LOL

That is how I grew up as well... except back then the teachers were actually allowed to slap a kid around a bit.

I tended to behave and do my work at school........ unless there was a sub. :)

Phobia
02-08-2008, 06:21 PM
Write a letter to his parents.

Good parenting is really the only way to correct this. I was like this once with an Algebra II class. I hated my teacher's guts. I blamed failing entirely on her. I thought I had it good when the semester was over and finally the stupid class was over. I would take Algebra II next year with a different teacher.

Nope. Went to summer school. ROFL

Fortunately I liked the teacher.
Shut up. I wouldn't take life advice from you if I needed to know which wookie was a sexual predator.

Bill S Preston
02-08-2008, 06:24 PM
LOL

That is how I grew up as well... except back then the teachers were actually allowed to slap a kid around a bit.

I tended to behave and do my work at school........ unless there was a sub. :)



Crazy how that works huh?

munkey
02-08-2008, 06:30 PM
No kids of my own.

And the pro ball is him talking.... not me.

He says he wants to play pro ball so I try and use it to help motivate him. Nothing more.

You know its sad when parents don't get envolved. I see it everyday with some of my daughters friends (I have 3) and I can't for the life of me understand why they don't give a $hit.

Here's a conversation my wife started with one of her friends on the way to a basketball game:

Wife: So what does your father do?
Kid: He's dead
Wife: Oh...I'm so sorry...What happened?
Kid: He died of Liver cirrhosis..he was 34.
Wife: Is your mom coming?
Kid: No...She's tired and wants to sleep in today.

This is a 13 year old girl...I can tell you now she won't go anywhere in life. She has no support what's so ever.

dj56dt58
02-08-2008, 06:31 PM
tell em to straighten up or he'll end up like goatse

Skip Towne
02-08-2008, 06:32 PM
No, I posted this for shits and grins. LOL

Really though, I am not a 5th grade teacher. My job at school is to work with kids one on one who are either trouble makers, or borderline special ed.

I basically give those kids the one on one attention they need to make it through the class and try to set an example for them to follow.
So you're a goon?

FAX
02-08-2008, 06:38 PM
There are 3 types of learners, visual, auditory and kinesthetic.

Find out HOW he learns. Does he do better with a hands-on activity vs listening to instruction? Find games, group activities that allow him to absorb some things, while he's learning. Give him tastes of success and challenge him.

If he's quitting because things are getting a little tough now, how does he expect to react when he meets his match in competative level? He'll have to work even harder than the other guy to beat him.

Keep beating the message in different ways until you find one that gets his attention. He might be absorbing a lot more of your message than you think.

Earn his trust, lead by example....Show him the way.

Great points, all. I have found that kids develop when someone listens to them. Even when they don't make any friggin' sense at all. Grown ups love to talk, but they rarely have time to listen. Listening to a kid is like planting magic beans in their head.

I have no idea how you might find the circumstances to spend some one-on-one time with this young person and let things develop to the point that he begins to speak. But, were that to happen and you could just listen to the feller - no advice, suggestions, life lessons, etc. - I wonder if he would begin to engage the world a little more.

FAX

Skip Towne
02-08-2008, 06:40 PM
Shut up. I wouldn't take life advice from you if I needed to know which wookie was a sexual predator.
Sorta like taking marital advice from Slayer.

MTG#10
02-08-2008, 06:46 PM
Malboro Chief?
How is "His confidence at such a young age is actually quite admirable" a racist comment? I am no racist, please dont categorize me with that tool.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:48 PM
So you're a goon?

LOL

Nah, most of my kids love me. But with the kids who feel that they can do whatever they want to in school.... yeah, I can be a hard ass.

I understand that a kid may simply "not get it" on occasion. I am patient and try to help them through the problem. On the other hand, I will not tolerate a kid simply giving up EVERYTIME they come up against something they don't fully comprehend.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 06:49 PM
How is "His confidence at such a young age is actually quite admirable" a racist comment? I am no racist, please dont categorize me with that tool.

Perhaps I misunderstood.

I was relating that "confidence" comment to the fact that he is of mixed race.

Were you talking about his belief that he will play pro ball?

If so, my apologies.

If not, then my reply stand. :p

Mr. Flopnuts
02-08-2008, 07:05 PM
Perhaps I misunderstood.

I was relating that "confidence" comment to the fact that he is of mixed race.

Were you talking about his belief that he will play pro ball?

If so, my apologies.

If not, then my reply stand. :p


How's the gym going? I haven't seen your number change in over a week.

JBucc
02-08-2008, 07:13 PM
Is this him? http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=869_1201052822

If it is, I think you should offer to become his agent.

MTG#10
02-08-2008, 07:20 PM
Perhaps I misunderstood.

I was relating that "confidence" comment to the fact that he is of mixed race.

Were you talking about his belief that he will play pro ball?

If so, my apologies.

If not, then my reply stand. :p
Yes about his belief he will play pro ball. Theres not many kids that young already thinking of their future.

Simplex3
02-08-2008, 07:22 PM
Grab a ruler and spank his ass till he sits down and does his work.
Bingo.

Simplex3
02-08-2008, 07:23 PM
Show him pictures of Michael Vick and Peyton Manning, and ask him why he thinks their outcomes are different.
LMAO

Iowanian
02-08-2008, 07:45 PM
I can see how this is valid pr..

In many situations as men who volunteer or work in situations, you find yourself in the position of being one of the only positive male role models in some kids lives.

Coaches, teachers, big brothers/sisters, hell, I've had neighbor kids who needed someone to fix their bike and provide them with advice.

Particularly in an elementary setting, you have the opportunity to make a difference. You can't fix them all, but you can sure as hell do your best.

blueballs
02-08-2008, 07:53 PM
To bad that you are not closer to Columbia
there will be few players doing community service

Valiant
02-08-2008, 07:54 PM
... who simply does not care. He is in 5th grade and has simply given up.

How do you motivate a 5th grader who thinks he has achieved academically all he is going to achieve?

He thinks his skills on the basketball court (he really is pretty good actually) will carry him through life.

I have tried "fatherly" sit downs with the kid and explained to him that if he wants to play pro ball, he will need to go to college. But that no college will let him play if he can't make decent grades. He is a smart kid but he has to stop giving up so quickly and actually pay attention in class.

I have tried getting him interested in books and reading using things he likes. Animals and sports.

I have tried "tough love" and told him that if he keeps giving up on everything, that he would wind up working the midnight shift at walmart.

I have ignored him and told him to come back when he actually wants to pay attention and learn.

I have tried stepping him through the process (reducing fractions for example) step by step.... AND HE GETS IT. He just simply does not want to do it.

Dunno what to do for him anymore really. His parents are not involved and obviously don't push him to achieve. He thinks he is dumb, and he is not. But when he gets home, instead of doing his homework.... his parents let him plant himself in front of the TV.

*sigh*

Parents.... any suggestions on what else I can do to motivate this kid?

Without the parents getting involved you are ****ed.. Maybe a call to family services or the parents parents...

Valiant
02-08-2008, 08:00 PM
Shut up. I wouldn't take life advice from you if I needed to know which wookie was a sexual predator.


LOL.. okay thats rep..

Hammock Parties
02-08-2008, 08:01 PM
... who simply does not care. He is in 5th grade and has simply given up.

How do you motivate a 5th grader who thinks he has achieved academically all he is going to achieve?

He thinks his skills on the basketball court (he really is pretty good actually) will carry him through life.

I have tried "fatherly" sit downs with the kid and explained to him that if he wants to play pro ball, he will need to go to college. But that no college will let him play if he can't make decent grades. He is a smart kid but he has to stop giving up so quickly and actually pay attention in class.

I have tried getting him interested in books and reading using things he likes. Animals and sports.

I have tried "tough love" and told him that if he keeps giving up on everything, that he would wind up working the midnight shift at walmart.

I have ignored him and told him to come back when he actually wants to pay attention and learn.

I have tried stepping him through the process (reducing fractions for example) step by step.... AND HE GETS IT. He just simply does not want to do it.

Dunno what to do for him anymore really. His parents are not involved and obviously don't push him to achieve. He thinks he is dumb, and he is not. But when he gets home, instead of doing his homework.... his parents let him plant himself in front of the TV.

*sigh*

Parents.... any suggestions on what else I can do to motivate this kid?

maybe figure out what the kids parents are like. He may not have any good role models when it comes to stuff like that, because the parents are the same way. Find him a role model that he could relate to in a way so that he could figure out that type of stuff really. its a tricky subject, because if they aren't getting the reinforcement at home, there isn't much you can do in the classroom. so id start with the home life first i guess.

Valiant
02-08-2008, 08:07 PM
You could also found out who the coach is(if a rec club) if it the schools team just tell the coach how it is..

If that works have the coach bench his ass until he starts wanting to learn.. Being a councilor, then you need to find out the easiest way the kid likes to learn and adopt those strategies in his classrooms..

If the parents outright refuse help, tell them that the teachers and school will grade him at his education level and fail him.. He can then repeat the 5th grade, transfer or be home schooled..


Really sucks that you do not have parents that care.. But unfortunately you cannot win them all.. Don't spend too much extra time on him and neglect other kids though..

Valiant
02-08-2008, 08:09 PM
maybe figure out what the kids parents are like. He may not have any good role models when it comes to stuff like that, because the parents are the same way. Find him a role model that he could relate to in a way so that he could figure out that type of stuff really. its a tricky subject, because if they aren't getting the reinforcement at home, there isn't much you can do in the classroom. so id start with the home life first i guess.



Or found out who his favorite NBA players are and see if one will come talk to him.. About school, learning and worthless parents and succeeding in spite of them..

Hammock Parties
02-08-2008, 08:15 PM
if the child is burdoned with half-ass stuff in about all facets of life than thats all the child is going to know. He needs a role model to show him the values of education and so forth.

Priest4Prez
02-08-2008, 08:27 PM
I have the same exact problem. that is where academic eligibility comes in. that is modivation enough to keep your grades up

Tribal Warfare
02-08-2008, 09:09 PM
I suggest finding someone who was/is gifted athletically, but chose another profession other than athletics who's very successful to talk to the kid who can truly relate to him.

l0rd0s3
02-08-2008, 09:29 PM
I like the idea of trying to get a professional or even collegiate athlete to talk to the kid. Sometimes that "star power" can awe them or motivate them to work a little harder.

Worth a try, though.. like everyone said, its gonna be a lot harder without the support at home.. he's lucky to have someone like you in his life.

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 09:30 PM
Thanks for the replies guys..... I know some people up at WSU. Gonna see if I might get a player to write the kid a letter about what it takes to play college ball and the importance of keeping their grade up.

Don't really know anyone who excelled at athletics and did not choose that as their career. lol

Hammock Parties
02-08-2008, 11:26 PM
you're from down in wichita?

pr_capone
02-08-2008, 11:31 PM
you're from down in wichita?

Not by birth... or choice really, but yeah. :p

Tribal Warfare
02-08-2008, 11:35 PM
know some people up at WSU. Gonna see if I might get a player to write the kid a letter about what it takes to play college ball and the importance of keeping their grade up.



I would really try to arrange a face to face meeting because it's more personal. Plus, most players would honored to do it because it's a compliment to their ability, and some could be going for a teaching degree also. It would be a good experience in mentoring children, and who knows they become friends

Hammock Parties
02-08-2008, 11:38 PM
im not sure if you said in your original post, but what race is his family? a lot of the time when it comes to mexicans or blacks they don't have the role models in the media at all. They only see exactly what is portrayed of them and thats no good junkie for the blacks and illegal immigrant that works for crappy money doing shit jobs. It really is a problem in society along with the parents, because everybody portrays anybody that isn't white in somewhat of a negative manner.