So Rene Descartes walks into a bar...

[RealSNR]

And he's already a bit tipsy. When he asks for a beer, the bartender asks him, "Hey now, don't you think you've already had enough?"

Descartes says, "Nah. I don't think so" after which he promptly disappears from existence

[WoodDraw]

Nothing like some good philosophy humor, although generally his response is "I think not!" which works a bit better than "I don't think so".

[bowener]

Nothing like some good philosophy humor, although generally his response is "I think not!" which works a bit better than "I don't think so".

Dammit, you beat me to it.

Philosophy is my major, and the one I typically hear is, "Descartes walks into a resteraunt and the waitress promptly asks him if he knows what he wants to eat. Descartes stops for a second and answers, 'I think not.' And poof, he disappears."

I am actually reading his meditations right now for my class I have in 9 hours or so. Very interesting.

[RealSNR]

Nothing like some good philosophy humor, although generally his response is "I think not!" which works a bit better than "I don't think so".I would agree, but this was the way I heard it today from a philosophy professor.

[Reaper16]

I'm a philosophy minor, so I can join in here.
There is this old story about Samuel Johnson (most notable as the author of the first English dictionary) walking with a friend, discussing philosophy. The subject of George Berkeleey came up. Johnson kicked a rock across the road and said "I thus refute Berkely."
A similar Berkely story goes like this: James Joyce is having a party at his home down the street from Berkeley. George goes to Joyce's home, knocks on the door, but no one answers. He can see everyone partying through the window, but no one answers the door. When Berkeley asks Joyce about it the next day, telling Joyce that no one would open the door for him, Joyce asks him "Since when have you been one to be stopped by matter?"

[Jenson71]

That doesn't make any sense, Reaper. James Joyce and George Berkley lived about two centuries apart from each other.

(I'm a history major)

[DaneMcCloud]

Roswell

[Boon]

Man, this is some funny shit right here!
I'm bout to piss my pants laughing.

[gblowfish]

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel,

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away--
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And René Descartes was a drunken fart.
'I drink, therefore I am.'

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he's pissed.

Eric Idle

[siberian khatru]

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel,

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away--
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And René Descartes was a drunken fart.
'I drink, therefore I am.'

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he's pissed.

Eric Idle

Bastard beat me to it! :D

[RealSNR]

That doesn't make any sense, Reaper. James Joyce and George Berkley lived about two centuries apart from each other.

(I'm a history major)
Q: How do you get a history major off your porch?
A: Pay for the pizza

:D

[dj56dt58]

what the fu...where am I?

[Third Eye]

I am actually reading his meditations right now for my class I have in 9 hours or so. Very interesting.

Interesting, but ultimately flawed. Particularly when he breaks off into extension.

[bowener]

Interesting, but ultimately flawed. Particularly when he breaks off into extension.

It may be flawed for us, but for him, it was absolutely perfect.

I am not a fan though.

[bowener]

Q: How do you get a history major off your porch?
A: Pay for the pizza

:D

What the hell does a philosophy major do?

Make the name tags of pizza-boys??

(FTR, those that did not read above, I am a phil. major).

[Reaper16]

That doesn't make any sense, Reaper. James Joyce and George Berkley lived about two centuries apart from each other.

(I'm a history major)
It may have been someone else... I heard the joke like three years ago. Of course, it may have been told as James Joyce, because its not like the content of the story is factual, either. :)