What Serious Advice would you offer this guy? [Archive]

teedubya

03-13-2008, 11:20 PM

Rausch

03-13-2008, 11:34 PM

He's a man of many weaknesses too afraid to pull himself up by his own bootstraps and take command of his own life. The children thing is an excuse the battered use because they're too aftraid what might lurk outside the controlling structure MANX has forced them under for years.

They've been under a dominant person for so long it makes them uncomfortable to have to be the dominant person. Or perhaps they just don't like it.

In short: Quit being a pu$$y. Let that other person know what you want and if they don't comply then give them the old fashioned thermo-nuke-inna-boot right up under yestarday's lunch...

Huffman83

03-13-2008, 11:37 PM

Start drinking heavily.

But man up!!! It's pathetic! And not even in a sexist "The man should make the decisions." kind of way.

This is about respect. You don't treat anyone like that. Especially your spouse.

Unless she's paying your bills.....

Then shut up and rub her feet.

Rausch

03-13-2008, 11:40 PM

Unless she's paying your bills.....

Then shut up and rub her feet.

Don't you dare ruin the setup I've got going on here.

Otter

03-13-2008, 11:42 PM

When you think the last time was he got a blowjob?

Hammock Parties

03-13-2008, 11:44 PM

I would unload a nine...

RIGHT IN HER ****ING FACE

Huffman83

03-13-2008, 11:45 PM

When you think the last time was he got a blowjob?

I'm sure he has no idea of what you're talking about.

Valiant

03-13-2008, 11:48 PM

He's a man of many weaknesses too afraid to pull himself up by his own bootstraps and take command of his own life. The children thing is an excuse the battered use because they're too aftraid what might lurk outside the controlling structure MANX has forced them under for years.

They've been under a dominant person for so long it makes them uncomfortable to have to be the dominant person. Or perhaps they just don't like it.

In short: Quit being a pu$$y. Let that other person know what you want and if they don't comply then give them the old fashioned thermo-nuke-inna-boot right up under yestarday's lunch...

The same advice if the genders were reversed.. Get the hell out of the relationship..

SBK

03-14-2008, 12:45 AM

That couple needs counseling, and it sounds like he needs to be a man. That doesn't mean abuse her or anything, but he's not a kid, he needs to let his wife know that they are equals. Then he needs to get both of them help, that's a very destructive relationship.

BWillie

03-14-2008, 12:51 AM

I would buy myself a new boat with her savings account. File for divorce, and then never have to care for another man's kids again. Then I'd drink a bunch of rum and go to Vegas.

Rausch

03-14-2008, 12:52 AM

I would buy myself a new boat with her savings account. File for divorce, and then never have to care for another man's kids again. Then I'd drink a bunch of rum and go to Vegas.

We should talk more...

RustShack

03-14-2008, 12:58 AM

Shove my dick in her mouth then blow it in her face, man up and pimp slap the bitch. He probably makes the money, show her who runs the show.

blueballs

03-14-2008, 01:07 AM

wait for it

wait for it

anti-freeze

teedubya

03-14-2008, 01:08 AM

Personally, Id make her sit on the toilet for a couple of years.

CoMoChief

03-14-2008, 02:08 AM

kepp

03-14-2008, 06:56 AM

This reminds me of an ex-neighbor. Every time he saw me outside doing stuff around the house he would come over and ask for advice about his "relationship". The two of them weren't married, she had kids and she definitely carried his jewels in her purse. She would (according to him) incite her kids to make fun of him for being overweight, ugly, etc and then join in. They had the same issues about money. I told him to move out of there and get on with your life...you're being abused. But he never did, so I finally told him to stop asking for advice if he wasn't going to follow it. The dude was seriously codependent.

DTLB58

03-14-2008, 06:59 AM

I would take her name off any joint banking accounts, take any credit cards away if there are any and give her say a $100 bucks a month allowance and tell her to STFD and STFU.

If she don't like it she can leave.

Seriously, If they really want to keep the marriage they can go into counseling and that should either make or break the relationship.

DTLB58

03-14-2008, 07:01 AM

This reminds me of an ex-neighbor. Every time he saw me outside doing stuff around the house he would come over and ask for advice about his "relationship". The two of them weren't married, she had kids and she definitely carried his jewels in her purse. She would (according to him) incite her kids to make fun of him for being overweight, ugly, etc and then join in. They had the same issues about money. I told him to move out of there and get on with your life...you're being abused. But he never did, so I finally told him to stop asking for advice if he wasn't going to follow it. The dude was seriously codependent.

Good advice, both times. :clap:

MIAdragon

03-14-2008, 07:14 AM

This.

http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a293/Snatch1986/stfu.jpg

Stryker

03-14-2008, 07:17 AM

Grow a set of nuts and

http://media.vintagecotton.com/shirt/95/pimp_hand01.gif

Braincase

03-14-2008, 07:18 AM

He needs to get mad, recount all the ways she is domineering, if she interrupts tell her that he's not finished so sit the **** and shut the **** up if she has any interest in saving this marriage. At the end of it all, he's gotta look her straight in the eye and ask her if this is the same way her first marriage ended.

He might have two step kids, but unless he stands up for himself, he's not being much of a role model. He needs to pull himself up to a level playing field and just once make her feel as bad as she makes him feel.

Either that, or he leaves a note saying that he's checking into a hotel or staying at a friends house and he's planning on contacting an attorney unless she agrees to go to counseling.

KC Kings

03-14-2008, 07:22 AM

Three words come to mind...

Five Across the Eyes

That is four words, but for the best effect you say 'the eyes' quickly so they are blended into a 1 syllable word.

Chief Chief

03-14-2008, 09:06 AM

I agree with Braincase.

Note that the wife always knows she's right. She most likely won't go to counseling because she knows in her mind that she's not doing anything that needs fixing. So he could invite her to counseling but she'll probably refuse to go, in which he's then justified in threatening legal action unless she goes to a counselor. Even then, she'll probably go just to go and won't heed the advice of the counselor. But at least he'll see her true colors and realize that she's beyond hope or help. The kids should go to their own counseling session with the guy just so they learn how to show proper respect to their stepdad. Yep, it looks like the kids will be the victims as their parents' relationship will be severed but at least the body count won't increase to 3 and hopefully the kids will see that their mom is really the cause of the broken marriage.

Fish

03-14-2008, 09:27 AM

I have serious doubts about ever changing a woman in that bad of mental shape. I've seen friends try to "help" a woman like that in the past. Thinking she was a project that they could fix into a quality person.

Uhh uhh.... it doesn't happen....

Cut your losses and tell the crazy lady to get help.

Sully

03-14-2008, 09:31 AM

The problem is all inside your head, she said to me
The answer is easy if you take it logically
Id like to help you in your struggle to be free
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover

She said its really not my habit to intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning wont be lost or misconstrued
But Ill repeat myself at the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
Fifty ways to leave your lover

Just slip out the back, jack
Make a new plan, stan
You dont need to be coy, roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, gus
You dont need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, lee
And get yourself free

Just slip out the back, jack
Make a new plan, stan
You dont need to be coy, roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, gus
You dont need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, lee
And get yourself free

She said it grieves me so to see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again
I said I appreciate that and would you please explain
About the fifty ways

She said why dont we both just sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning youll begin to see the light
And then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
Fifty ways to leave your lover

Just slip out the back, jack
Make a new plan, stan
You dont need to be coy, roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, gus
You dont need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, lee
And get yourself free

You just slip out the back, jack
Make a new plan, stan
You dont need to be coy, roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, gus
You dont need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, lee
And get yourself free

Ultra Peanut

03-14-2008, 09:34 AM

SEVER

Bowser

03-14-2008, 09:37 AM

Sure-Oz

03-14-2008, 10:18 AM

I'd bust her lip open with a bowling ball...

the guy has major insecurities, id start getting the control back, but the guy needs to grow a pair first.

penguinz

03-14-2008, 10:23 AM

Suggest some entry level english courses at the local community college.

el borracho

03-14-2008, 10:52 AM

1st option: leave
2nd option: get counseling

teedubya

03-14-2008, 01:09 PM

Suggest some entry level english courses at the local community college.

ROFL

Mama Hip Rockets

03-15-2008, 02:58 AM

Personally, Id make her sit on the toilet for a couple of years.

ROFLROFL

Iowanian

03-15-2008, 07:49 AM

He should quietly finish his snifter of cavasier, and then do it her in butt.

teedubya

03-15-2008, 10:44 AM

Is that the best you got, Iowanian? Also, it's http://www.cv-us.com/images/courvoisier_logo.jpg

Iowanian

03-15-2008, 10:47 AM

I was waiting for the most obvious, and should be well known Iowanian answer.

Did anyone not know what it was going to be?

"SPARE THE ROD, SPOIL THE BROAD!"

http://www.bgstudios.com/images/Deficiency.jpg

Mr. Laz

03-15-2008, 10:53 AM

err ...... stand up for yourself?!?!

seriously, she makes you "feel inferior"?

you don't have to fight, don't have to get petty ...... just stand up for youself and don't let her browbeat you.

"yes, i took 20 bucks out of the bank .... it's my money too, deal with!" *walk away*

she only has the power you give her, so don't give her so much.

dj56dt58

03-15-2008, 10:57 AM

What did the five fingers say to the face?

Buehler445

03-15-2008, 11:00 AM

He seriously needs to attempt to communicate with her. It has to be in a situation with no distractions and tell her how he feels. If she shuts him down, call a lawyer. Without effective communication, nothing else can happen. He can try to assert himself, but it doesn't sound like he is very good at that.

The other alternative is burn the house down, then she will be pissed enough to hit him. At that point, it becomes a "civil dispute" in which the cops will do nothing. Bust her in the kneecaps with a shovel.

Let me know how option #2 works out.

Iowanian

03-15-2008, 11:04 AM

I'll paint this picture.

This man is about 110lbs. Wifezilla is about 290 and wears nylon stretchy pants. The wife is bossy to everyone and fancies herself the queen of the trailer park. She likely has a small herd of their kids friends who she wants to call her "mom" and tell them all what to do about their problems. The husband is a weaker, meager man who lacks a lot of self confidence. She chose him for this reason. Like prison, once he submitted to her dominance, he's destined to be her bitch for the rest of his sentence. When he stands up to her it'll be a fight as she won't tollerate him being disobedient. He'll speak up and raise his voice, she'll turn into the trailer park, loudmouth sow that she is and beat him down.

he'll cower, lower his head to avoid eye contact...and shuffle into the kitchen to finish the dishes.

bringbackmarty

03-15-2008, 11:17 AM

he should just go ahead and buy her a strap on, so she can finish ****ing him in the ass before she runs off with an ex con, or a construction worker or something.

bringbackmarty

03-15-2008, 11:18 AM

to me it sounds like she wants to fight. he should give her one. choke the bitch out and then shove it in her ass, it's what she clearly wants.

bringbackmarty

03-15-2008, 11:19 AM

well it's made my marriage better, that's for sure.

T-post Tom

03-15-2008, 11:20 AM

Personally, Id make her sit on the toilet for a couple of years.

:clap:

T-post Tom

03-15-2008, 11:24 AM

Sounds like he suffers from vaginal dryness. He should buy a water-based lubricant and use copious amounts when she's having her way with him.

Rain Man

03-15-2008, 11:46 AM

What did the five fingers say to the face?

Two in the ... wait, that's a different finger conversation.

dj56dt58

03-15-2008, 11:51 AM

Two in the ... wait, that's a different finger conversation.

ROFL

Bwana

03-16-2008, 12:26 AM

Is this the same guy?