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dorseybowe
12-03-2008, 01:45 PM
NEW YORK, NY - Plaxico Burress has finally admitted who - or what - he was aiming at when he accidentally shot himself.

On Friday, November 28, Giants receiver Plaxico Burress left a New York City nightclub after accidentally shooting himself in his right thigh. Burress checked into a hospital under a pseudonym but was soon recognized by hospital staff members and the media was notified.

After taking counsel with his lawyer, Burress finally surrendered to the police on Monday, with an explanation they were not expecting: Burress was aiming at a leprechaun who had been getting fresh with his wife!

Weekly World News tracked the leprachaun down for his side of the story. Seamus O’Shaughnessy said to reporters “I dinnea lay a hand on the lass tha’ she dinnea want! She made the first move sure as I’m standin’ here! He asked for an apology, an’ sure enough he got it! Not my fault if the daftie tripped over his sweatpants an nearly blew off his John Thomas.”

However before O’Shaughnessy could answer any further questions he disappeared with the reporter’s wallet and pants.

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/headlines/burress-blames-leprechaun-for-injury/

dorseybowe
12-03-2008, 01:46 PM
Here's the pic:

smittysbar
12-03-2008, 01:50 PM
:spock:

InChiefsHeaven
12-03-2008, 03:02 PM
No, this story was from when he shot himself last St. Patricks day...

...this latest incident he was shooting at an elf...same reason...

Extra Point
12-03-2008, 06:35 PM
Always after me lucky gams!

CoMoChief
12-03-2008, 06:39 PM
I then heard the leprachaun escaped and fled down to Mobile, AL where he was then caught.....we sort of....

<param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZVqZ3N9YnnY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZVqZ3N9YnnY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed>

MichaelH
12-03-2008, 06:40 PM
I didn't know they served Absinthe in NYC.

KcMizzou
12-03-2008, 06:54 PM
I then heard the leprachaun escaped and fled down to Mobile, AL where he was then caught.....we sort of....

<param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZVqZ3N9YnnY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZVqZ3N9YnnY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed>Never gets old...

SAUTO
12-03-2008, 07:12 PM
Never gets old...

I laugh my ass off every time its posted

DeezNutz
12-03-2008, 07:22 PM
Never gets old...

I've never seen that. Too funny.

SAUTO
12-03-2008, 07:24 PM
i'm tellin you guys that at the 26 second mark edge james is there holding a video camera LOL

Sweet Daddy Hate
12-03-2008, 07:54 PM
It's great clip, but it's even better with Patrice O' Neil bagging on it:http://www.vh1.com/video/play.jhtml?id=1534016&vid=91490

KChiefsQT
12-03-2008, 10:22 PM
Never gets old...

Hahaha... wow I didn't realize how classy the town folk of Mobile, Alabama were.

KcMizzou
12-03-2008, 10:26 PM
Hahaha... wow I didn't realize how classy the town folk of Mobile, Alabama were.I like the ancient leprechaun flute.

teedubya
12-03-2008, 11:20 PM
yeah that ancient leprechaun flute was priceless... so is the lady in the car talking about crackheads.

DeezNutz
12-03-2008, 11:58 PM
I like the ancient leprechaun flute.

That's a big one-hitter.

CoMoChief
12-04-2008, 08:21 AM
I like the sketching of the leprachaun. ROFL

Sweet Daddy Hate
12-04-2008, 09:03 AM
Another Gem:

http://www.vh1.com/video/play.jhtml?id=1534016&vid=91493

Sweet Daddy Hate
12-04-2008, 09:05 AM
These are just fuckin' GOLD.

http://www.vh1.com/video/play.jhtml?id=1534016&vid=91494

Sweet Daddy Hate
12-04-2008, 09:07 AM
Oh yeah:

http://www.vh1.com/video/play.jhtml?id=1534016&vid=91494

Dylan
12-04-2008, 12:22 PM
The odds of anything happening to Plaxico Burress is almost nil according to The New York Times.

The New York Times
About New York

By JIM DWYER
Published: December 2, 2008

When Handguns Are Accompanied by Stupidity, Anything Can Happen

At the moment, a football player who accidentally shot himself in the leg at a nightclub is causing far more excitement than the murder by knife of Edwin Thomas, a bus driver on the B46 route in Brooklyn who scolded a fare beater. Stupidity is the reigning crime of the century in New York.

The mayor has virtually demanded the immediate imprisonment of the football player, Plaxico Burress, for three and a half years, and called for the prosecution of a hospital that treated his gunshot wound and failed to report it to the police. He also seeks some unspecified form of disgrace for the Giants on grounds that the team may have been lackadaisical in calling the cops.

Anything other than prison for Mr. Burress, Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg said, would be a “sham, a mockery of the law.”

It sort of depends on your definition of a sham and a mockery. Mr. Burress wouldn’t be the first to get off easier than the law seems to require on a gun charge.

In the real world occupied by nonmillionaire nonathletes, the cases of 986 people arrested in the city last year on the same charges as Mr. Burress have been completed — and 90 percent resulted in convictions for less serious crimes, half of them misdemeanors or violations, said John M. Caher, a spokesman for the New York State Division of Criminal Justice Services.

Mayor Bloomberg has made antigun work a central piece of business in his second term, a righteous cause that has absorbed the energy of mayors for at least 30 years: Handguns have long been the prime instruments of human destruction in New York and other big cities. Bringing a loaded gun into a nightclub does not make one a criminal mastermind or even a menace to society, but it surely is reckless — especially if you end up firing it while trying not to spill a drink.

At Mr. Bloomberg’s instigation, the state stiffened the penalty for carrying an unlicensed gun in 2006. It is now the legal equivalent of robbery or burglarizing a home, a C felony that carries a mandatory minimum sentence of three and a half years. Before that change, there was a minimum sentence of one year for gun possession, but judges could waive it if they decided it was unduly harsh. The new law took away that discretion.

Now, in subway posters and billboards, the city bluntly promises state prison time for illegal guns, “no exceptions.”

Except that there are.

“Less than 10 percent of the people charged with second-degree criminal possession of a weapon, which carries the mandatory prison sentence, are ultimately convicted of that charge,” Mr. Caher said.

The Bloomberg gun law of 2006 has made a difference in sentencing, though generally not for hard-core criminals, who would have faced serious time even without the tougher penalties, defense lawyers said on Tuesday.

Under the old law, said Matthew W. Knecht, supervising attorney with the Neighborhood Defender Service of Harlem, a young defendant with a clean record would have been able to enter a program and earn a chance at probation.

“If it wasn’t someone young or particularly sympathetic, the unwritten rule was that you were doing a year,” Mr. Knecht said. “Now, regularly, we’re getting time upstate — two years on a first arrest with no priors.”

The full impact of the law will take three or four years to show itself. Extended sentences are one measure. Another will be finding out what prison does to first offenders who might not otherwise have gone upstate.

Plaxico Burress may change the calculus entirely if he winds up in prison. Even if 90 percent of those arrested for gun possession continue to get some form of leniency, his incarceration would be a more powerful advertisement than covering the entire fleet of subway cars with posters.

“The whole point of increasing the penalties in the law and being very public about it is to really eliminate the inappropriate possession of guns in New York City,” said Lisa Schreibersdorf, the director of Brooklyn Defenders Services. “You’re a role model; it’s like the guy with the dogs,” referring to Michael Vick, the football player who was imprisoned in a dogfighting case.

“But you can’t sentence someone only because they’re a role model,” she said. “The law doesn’t impose a bigger responsibility on someone because they happen to be a public person.”

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/03/nyregion/03about.html?scp=1&sq=jim%20dywer%20handguns&st=cse

Dylan
12-04-2008, 12:25 PM
Welcome back Plax:

Sports of The Times
Giants Leave Door Open to a Burress Return

By WILLIAM C. RHODEN
Published: December 3, 2008

Excerpt:
On Wednesday, Reese, who helped engineer last season’s Super Bowl run, said that if Burress survived a blizzard of legal issues, he could be a Giant in 2009. “Provided he plays by Giants rules,” Reese said.

Without going into detail, Reese said the Giants’ front office was on the same page about Burress’s possible future with the Giants — namely that he had one — provided he was not in jail and provided he had a 180-degree attitude adjustment.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/04/sports/football/04rhoden.html?ref=sports

gotsa to run. ...