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View Full Version : Poop so, I just sharted. :(

Ceej
02-23-2009, 03:24 AM
So, here I am lying in bed, uncomfortably. I have been heavily fatigued the last day for whatever reason. So, I decide to try and sneak a toot out of my b-hole. That was a mistake. I just brown jizzed out of my brown eye. Last night I think I set some sort of record for like, 9 straight hurls. I am very rarely sick - so hopefully this isn't the flu or anything. It has been running through the family the last week or so. Prayers and condolences are appreciated. :)
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HMc
02-23-2009, 03:44 AM
vid pls
kcxiv
02-23-2009, 04:49 AM
haha, Shit happens man even worse when you get the stomach flu. I had it a few weeks back. I didnt get out of bed only to use the crapper, i didnt even eat for like 2 days. Just lots of fluids.
booger
02-23-2009, 06:15 AM
At least your sick and didn't just eat too many tomaters.

It coulda happened at the dinner table with the in laws, now that would be embarrassing.:)
booger
02-23-2009, 06:16 AM
what color was it?
Kerberos
02-23-2009, 06:35 AM
At least your sick and didn't just eat too many tomaters.

It coulda happened at the dinner table with the in laws, now that would be embarrassing.:)

I smell KlosterGate?

Wasn't Phil wearing someone elses underware after that?
Ceej
02-23-2009, 06:38 AM
Kc - shit happens? Well played!! LOL. And booger, at the time I didn't even think to get a sample. What the hell was I thinking?
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Ceej
02-23-2009, 06:42 AM
Oh, and for the record - I successfully just farted without any seepage. YESSSSSS!!!!!
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Kerberos
02-23-2009, 07:25 AM
Oh, and for the record - I successfully just farted without any seepage. YESSSSSS!!!!!
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When you least expect it...........EXPECT it.
luv
02-23-2009, 07:32 AM
Oh, and for the record - I successfully just farted without any seepage. YESSSSSS!!!!!
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Thanks for the play-by-play.
Fritz88
02-23-2009, 07:50 AM
awesome.
booger
02-23-2009, 07:55 AM
Kc - shit happens? Well played!! LOL. And booger, at the time I didn't even think to get a sample. What the hell was I thinking?
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you can look butt don't taste it
booger
02-23-2009, 07:57 AM
I smell KlosterGate?

Wasn't Phil wearing someone elses underware after that?

he borrowed some from teh neighbors iirc.
booger
02-23-2009, 07:58 AM
i pooped in a wishing well once, it was solid like a floating log though
Phobia
02-23-2009, 08:02 AM
Man, you're and idiot for sharing so much information. I don't know why anybody would do such a thing.
booger
02-23-2009, 08:24 AM
:LOL:
Gonzo
02-23-2009, 08:33 AM
There's a stomache virus going around, I had it then my wife and boy got it.

It lasts about 24-48 hrs.

Enjoy that.
gblowfish
02-23-2009, 09:49 AM
Color
Odor
Volume
Texture

Inquiring minds want to know...
Pioli Zombie
02-23-2009, 09:52 AM
Have a nice big bowl of chili or a liverwurst sandwich. Blast it out I say.
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blueballs
02-23-2009, 09:53 AM
If you knew how to eat right
you wouldn't fart at all
Pioli Zombie
02-23-2009, 09:54 AM
Have some chocolate slimfast and some mueslix.
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Pioli Zombie
02-23-2009, 09:56 AM
Have a woman vomit burp some shellfish into your mouth like in the 40 year old virgin.
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bevis369
02-23-2009, 10:14 AM
:fart::thumb:
Kerberos
02-23-2009, 12:17 PM
If you knew how to eat right
you wouldn't fart at all

My wife begs to differ.

You feed "ME" anything and I will have gas. Beeno just makes it worse.
Pablo
02-23-2009, 12:32 PM
I haven't had a good shart in a while.

Last time I did, it was a yellow turkey gravy looking mix. An incredibly unique peppery aroma accompanied my ass-mucus bomb.
Mr. Laz
02-23-2009, 12:37 PM
this place :doh!:







LMAO
ClevelandBronco
02-23-2009, 12:41 PM
Sounds like Ebola virus. You should be just fine.
Pioli Zombie
02-23-2009, 12:50 PM
Notable Colon killers

Any chinese restaurant in Olathe

Texas Roadhouse

Taco Johns

Wendys

Cracker Barrel
Kerberos
02-23-2009, 01:07 PM
Notable Colon killers

Any chinese restaurant in Olathe

Texas Roadhouse

Taco Johns

Wendys

Cracker Barrel


IMO just about ANY chinese food will bring on a case of the squirts depending on what dish you enjoy.

Taco Johns is/was a "Fine Scarffing Establishment" or at least last time I ate at one they were KICK ass after drinking for about 6 hours. Ours closed down here after the Big Red One left Ft. Riley in the mid 90's.

Wendys??? Meh...Here they are my favorite Burger joint.

Cracker Barrel??? They have some damn good hashbrown cassarole dude? :thumb:
Pioli Zombie
02-23-2009, 01:11 PM
IMO just about ANY chinese food will bring on a case of the squirts depending on what dish you enjoy.

Taco Johns is/was a "Fine Scarffing Establishment" or at least last time I ate at one they were KICK ass after drinking for about 6 hours. Ours closed down here after the Big Red One left Ft. Riley in the mid 90's.

Wendys??? Meh...Here they are my favorite Burger joint.

Cracker Barrel??? They have some damn good hashbrown cassarole dude? :thumb:


one time i was coming out of a cracker barrel rest room and my kid yells out for all to hear "Dad, did you have diahrrea?"
Ceej
02-23-2009, 01:12 PM
Whoever you were that prayed for me. Thanks.

No sharts this morning. Whew! I was concernicus.
Bowser
02-23-2009, 01:12 PM
Bananas and cheese, man. I would recommend mass quantities fo both.
Pioli Zombie
02-23-2009, 01:16 PM
i do not recommend Hardees at any time. Or Go, Chicken, Go.

I once had Go, Chicken, Go and it made me crap, chicken, crap
Kerberos
02-23-2009, 02:36 PM
one time i was coming out of a cracker barrel rest room and my kid yells out for all to hear "Dad, did you have diahrrea?"


While walking down the isle at Wal-Mart my kid will, Without warning, just hold his nose and YELL loudly... " You farted daddy... YOU STINK" whether is was me that farted or not.

Needless to say he and I shop only on Sunday mornings at 0630 or 0700. Not very many shoppers that early in the morning.