chick brearks up with BF. gets pissed. crushes his balls.

[Fritz88]

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0224092assault1.html

Student Busted For Squeeze Play
Cops: Colorado woman in on-campus groin assault of ex-boyfriend

FEBRUARY 24--Does this woman look like a testicle crusher? Well, that's what cops claim University of Colorado student Chalie Simon did to a former boyfriend early Saturday morning during a confrontation at a campus apartment. Simon, a 19-year-old sophomore, went to Job Donkor's home at about 4 AM and became irate when he sought to remove her from the residence. That's when Simon allegedly "grabbed his testicles and squeezed hard," according to a police report. Donkor, 23, replied, "Yeah, it hurt a lot," when a cop asked about Simon's squeeze play. Donkor told police that he had dated Simon "on and off" during the prior 18 months, and that they had broken up "approximately 20 times." Simon was apparently angry because Donkor had not, as promised, called or sent her a text message by 3 AM (police noted that another woman was sleeping in Donkor's bedroom when they arrived). Simon, pictured below in a Boulder County Sheriff's Office mug shot, was arrested on assault, trespass, and domestic violence charges. (2 pages)

http://i.cdn.turner.com/trutv/thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art4/0224092assault1.jpg

http://i.cdn.turner.com/trutv/thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art4/0224092assault2.gif

[Katipan]

I bet she spent the rest of her night smelling her hand.

[speak24]

stay away stay away...

[Fritz88]

I bet she spent the rest of her night smelling her hand.

wow, i never thought i'd say this.

gross.

[Al Bundy]

Well at least he wasn't in her mouth when she got pissed.

[milkman]

New man rule #1.
When breaking up with a girlfriend, always wear a cup.

[Frazod]

I'd hit it.

With my car.

[Fritz88]

New man rule #1.
When breaking up with a girlfriend, always wear a cup.

awesome rule.

Print'em

[milkman]

I'd hit it.

With my car.

And go through a red light with a camera to do it?

[Fritz88]

I'd hit it.

With my car.

ROFL

[Katipan]

All she wanted was a text message.

Geez.

[Frazod]

And go through a red light with a camera to do it?

Sure, why not? :evil:

[milkman]

All she wanted was a text message.

Geez.

Sorry Charlie.

Fucking another girl right now.

How would that go over in text?

[Buck]

Lets see pics of her hands.

[Fritz88]

Call this gay or whatever you want but I remember my buddies and I would
play this game where we actually crush each others balls.

I still have nightmares from those days.

I also remember one night I woke up screaming to an imaginary cat eating my balls.

Another crazy story. I have a friend, he said that 30 years ago, he went outside his house and saw a little kid. My friend was a few years older than that kid. He said that he crushed that little boy's balls so hard. Now, the little boy grew up and got married.
He is now impotent and can't have kids. My friend is living with this dilemma of wanting to amend for that mistake and tell that guy, I told him not to do it because he could get himself into some serious trouble.

[unothadeal]

Lets see pics of her hands.

She had man hands

http://www.whatsnextblog.com/man_hands.png

[Katipan]

Sorry Charlie.

****ing another girl right now.

How would that go over in text?

It's better than a voicemail.

[Frazod]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:

[Go Mizzou & Chiefs]

wow he must have done summin really badd

[Katipan]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:

ROFL

I love her

[Fritz88]

wow he must have done summin really badd

yeah, he did not text message her.

[milkman]

It's better than a voicemail.

Especially if the other girl is moaning in the backgroud, right?

[Frazod]

ROFL

I love her

She was very mean to me. :(

[Buck]

Sorry Charlie.

****ing another girl right now.

How would that go over in text?

Twitter would be better

[Katipan]

She was very mean to me. :(

I'll kill her

[milkman]

Twitter would be better

I have no idea what that means.

[Frazod]

I'll kill her

You rock. :rockon:

[Shaid]

Another crazy story. I have a friend, he said that 30 years ago, he went outside his house and saw a little kid. My friend was a few years older than that kid. He said that he crushed that little boy's balls so hard. Now, the little boy grew up and got married.
He is now impotent and can't have kids. My friend is living with this dilemma of wanting to amend for that mistake and tell that guy, I told him not to do it because he could get himself into some serious trouble.

Just fuck his wife and get her pregnant. Problem solved. :D

[Fritz88]

I have no idea what that means.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twitter

it's for your friends to know where you at, what you eat, when you poop, and what is the color of your undies.

[Hammock Parties]

Could have been worse.

http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/561/icepirates4.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

[speak24]

nnnnnnooooooooooooooo....

[Donger]

That's what eventually happens to all men who live in Boulder.

[CrazyHorse]

The penis envy is really getting out of hand.....so to speak.

Women going for mens groins every time they get pissed has got to stop. I think it warrants a good punch in the teeth.

[Crush]

My balls hurt just thinking about it.

[Donger]

The penis envy is really getting out of hand.....so to speak.

Women going for mens groins every time they get pissed has got to stop. I think it warrants a good punch in the teeth.

I remember an incident when I was about 16. I was being cocky with a young lady at a party and she was a little tipsy. She decided to grab my crotch and squeeze. I responded by grabbing her crotch and attempted to lift her off the ground by her crotch.

She released her hold rather quickly.

[Frazod]

My balls hurt just thinking about it.

Your name matches your post. LMAO

[Katipan]

That's what eventually happens to all men who live in Boulder.

Same chick?

[Donger]

Same chick?

Yes. Her nickname is Pebble.

[Katipan]

I remember an incident when I was about 16. I was being cocky with a young lady at a party and she was a little tipsy. She decided to grab my crotch and squeeze. I responded by grabbing her crotch and attempted to lift her off the ground by her crotch.

She released her hold rather quickly.

Secret handshake!

[Donger]

Secret handshake!

I doubt that I was the first male to venture into that cavern, but I doubt that she was so quick to treat the male package as Play-Doh again after that.

[Katipan]

I doubt that I was the first male to venture into that cavern, but I doubt that she was so quick to treat the male package as Play-Doh again after that.

I would have had a crush on 16 year old Donger.

[Donger]

I would have had a crush on 16 year old Donger.

Quid pro quo, my dear. You squeeze me, and you'll get squeezed.

[Frazod]

I remember an incident when I was about 16. I was being cocky with a young lady at a party and she was a little tipsy. She decided to grab my crotch and squeeze. I responded by grabbing her crotch and attempted to lift her off the ground by her crotch.

She released her hold rather quickly.

I knew a guy named Stan who referred to that move as "the Claw."

I assume Stan is probably in prison now.

[Crush]

Your name matches your post. LMAO


I did not mean to set that up. :)

[Crush]

There is definitely extra crazy in those eyes.

[blueballs]

If the stupid fuck let her in
when another one was cooling in the bedroom
it's hard to have sympathy

[Frazod]

There is definitely extra crazy in those eyes.

Yes.

I've always had a thing for crazy women with big brown eyes. That generally ended badly. :spank:

[cabletech94]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:

All redheads are nuts!!!!

[KcFanInGA]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:

Redheads are crazy. The only one I ever really thought was ok used to date my brother, and then she tried to put him up on felony charges for trying to wake her up by fingering her. The only one I ever hooked up with acted like a robot (no personality), and she was a friend of the girl I was dating at the time, so that wound up badly. And I havent seen anyone mention the dudes name from the post. Job donker? what the fuck? His parents must have been trippin, smokin, and watchin porn when he shot out, huh?

[Hammock Parties]

Quid pro quo, my dear. You squeeze me, and you'll get squeezed.

You're delightful, I ever tell you that?

[bluehawkdoc]

She wouldn't have pulled that crap if he had been wearing this.



85836

[Gracie Dean]

okay,

I would never do something like that, but...

can you really "pop" one?

what would happen? would someone need surgery to repair?

[blueballs]

can ligaments in you boobies
be pulled out of their sockets
-sorry the images hurt that much

[Crush]

okay,

I would never do something like that, but...

can you really "pop" one?

what would happen? would someone need surgery to repair?


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Testicular_torsion


Side note: This entire thread is scaring me.

[Sofa King]

There is definitely extra crazy in those eyes.

i agree... she looks like a ball crusher psycho lady...


cute, with a mind of meddle...

[Gracie Dean]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Testicular_torsion


Side note: This entire thread is scaring me.

Wow,

nasty

how awful



so.......

tell me this...does one ever "sit wrong" or walk wrong?

I could not imagine having to deal with the boys like that...seems like it would be a hazzard

boobs just hang there totally different issues

[Bearcat]

I bet she spent the rest of her night smelling her hand.

Best first reply ever. LMAO

[Dylan]

chick brearks up with BF. gets pissed. crushes his balls.


ROFL


i did not read the article -- i was too busy laughing at the title. ... lol

[Delano]

tell me this...does one ever "sit wrong" or walk wrong?

I could not imagine having to deal with the boys like that...seems like it would be a hazzard

Yes. This is a constant hazard for a man. One wrong move and you are in agony for several minutes.

In my honest opinion, women could probably be a little more sympathetic. Whenever this happens to me, I am laughed at, when in fact I should be consoled and offered a recovery blowjob.

[Kerberos]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:


Her name wasn't Rose was it? :hmmm:

[PhillyChiefFan]

She looks like she's got about 3 scoops of crazy in her.

[big nasty kcnut]

My two female best friends are redheaded twins the sweetest girls i know. The nutcracker girl is just crazy you don't mess with mr. Happy. Doing something like that might break my code of not hitting ladies.
Posted via Mobile Device

[Frazod]

Her name wasn't Rose was it? :hmmm:

Danielle. Danielle Marie.

I also learned to never date women with the middle name "Marie." Had a whole string of those, each worse than the last. When this one told me her middle name was Marie, my first instinct was to run like hell, and she told me I was being stupid and that her name had nothing to do with anything. Of course, she ended up being the worst of the lot.

[alpha_omega]

This is one of the few times where punching a woman would be totally justified.

[Jilly]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:

oh come on! Don't hate the whole race because of it!

[Frazod]

oh come on! Don't hate the whole race because of it!

Is your middle name Marie?

[Jilly]

Is your middle name Marie?

:redface: ummmm.... yes

[Fritz88]

This is one of the few times where punching a woman would be totally justified.

you'd end up dropping the soap. Not worth it my friend.

[Frazod]

:redface: ummmm.... yes

:eek:

[Jilly]

:eek:

I'm not crazy. I really am not crazy.

[Otter]

One of my ex-psychos told me that a guy she once dated hit her once. To get back, she ground up sleeping pills in his beer. Once he was out, she jerked him off until he got hard, then glued his dick to his stomach with Krazy Glue and hit in the balls with a cast iron skillet. Then left. According to her, he never bothered her again.

Now, I don't know if the story was true or not, but she was certainly mean enough to it.

I never dated another redhead after that.

:eek:

I had a bad red head experience as well. Casual dating went from 'where's my ring' to an ugly break up to me being stalked to 'my new boyfriend is going to kick your ass' to showing up at my house at 2am.

Fucking nightmare. Anyone who says the red head thing is just a myth never dated one. At least a natural one.

[Frazod]

I'm not crazy. I really am not crazy.

According to my research, you must be. LMAO

[Jilly]

I had a bad red head experience as well. Casual dating went from 'where's my ring' to an ugly break up to me being stalked to 'my new boyfriend is going to kick your ass' to showing up at my house at 2am.

****ing nightmare. Anyone who says the red head thing is just a myth never dated one. At least a natural one.

OH COME ON! We're just eccentric.....but damn it, we're passionate!

[gblowfish]

Future quadruple divorcee.

[chagrin]

I think the dude's name being Job Donkor is the funniest part of this story

[chagrin]

OH COME ON! We're just eccentric.....but damn it, we're passionate!

you damn straight...I mean, I don't know you of course, just sayin - red heads are rippin hot

[kaplin42]

Could have been worse.

http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/561/icepirates4.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Ice Pirates FTW!!!

All redheads are HAWT!!!!


FYP

[Baby Lee]

Someone borrow htis' testicle hammer of gentleness?

[cabletech94]

Ice Pirates FTW!!!




FYP

Yea, I always have had that hawt attraction myself.

Usually ended up with me noticing, "why the hell is she circling my block at 4 am?" Psycho probly spent 1000 bucks in gas that summer.